"You weren't wearing any panties?" Izzie asked handing Mer a cup of orange juice.
"No, they left the most hideous panty lines." She answered. Meredith had just told Izzie about her and McDreamy's midnight rendezvous.
"Nothing good can come of this." Meredith murmured. "He cheated again on his wife. What if, I mean what if, we can all work this out and he leaves Addison. I still have to live with the thought knowing that I broke them up. That and he might cheat on me too."
"You can't think that you are the sole reason they broke up Mer. But I do think that you two have this hot cosmic love affair going on. The kind where if Derek was like 'dead' for twelve years you would still miraculously find each other. But until he finally breaks it off with Addison you shouldn't be seeing him like that. Its wrong." Izzie left her alone with her thoughts to getting ready for work.
Meredith wrapped her coat around her tighter fighting off a chilly draft in the hospital. She had just finished her shift and was going to pick Mallory up form the nursery. Luckily for Meredith she was able to bring her child to work and not be apart from her all day. She rounded the corner spotting Addison in a hushed conversation with a tall very attractive man. His hand reached out to stroke her cheek and Addison's eyes closed at his touch. She was clearly enamored with this mystery man. Meredith turned around trying to avoid an awkward moment and took a different route. For some reason seeing Addison with someone other than Derek made her happy. It made her feel less guilty about sleeping with him last night. But nothing could ever make up for what they did it. She finally reached the nursery and smiled at one of the nurses.
"Hi there." She said walking over to Mallory who was sitting up in one of the playpens giggling with her arms stretched out. Meredith picked her up grabbing her things with her and thanking the nurses. After taking a minute to put her little coat on Meredith and Mallory made their way to the car. She strapped her into the backseat. While Meredith was getting ready to pull out of the parking lot her phone rang. She answered the unfamiliar number trying to figure out who it was.
"Hello?" Meredith said.
"Hi. Meredith is that you?" the male voice replied.
"Yeah, who is this?"
The man chuckled, "It's Mike from the bar. I was wondering what you were up to tonight?" he asked.
"Oh, I'm actually busy tonight with my family." She answered driving onto the road. "Why, were you planning on asking me out?" she teased passing Mallory her pacifier.
"I was as a matter of fact. What do you say?" Mike was nice, but no McDreamy. She couldn't see herself ever really pursing a relationship with him. He was just someone who took her mind off of Derek for one night.
"I'm sorry Mike I can't. Look I'll talk with you later because I can't talk right now." She finished quickly shutting the phone off and parking her car in front of her house. If this was how Meredith's life was going to be for the rest of her life she was not to thrilled about it.
After getting Mallory settled at home she began to prepare her dinner, which consisted of strained peas and beef or something along the lines of that disgusting combination. George and Izzie wouldn't be home for a while so Meredith planed on getting Mallory ready for bed early so she could have some alone time. When the doorbell rang mid spoonful, Meredith cleaned off her hands and walked to the front door. There she found Derek with a grocery bag; he wore his track jacket and those pair of jeans that were loose but tight around his butt. She opened the door and he smiled warmly not needing an invitation to come in.
"Picked up some chicken dinners at that Italian place you love and bought some more jars of baby food for Mallory. Oh and I remembered you were almost out of some diapers so I picked some up for you." He removed his jacket going into the kitchen to find Mallory.
"Hey baby girl." He cooed taking her out of her high chair.
"Derek she hasn't finished her dinner." Meredith said as he bounced her up and down. "Fine when you're wearing her dinner on your shirt don't say I didn't warn you." She sighed opening up one of the dinners he brought. Derek ceased the bouncing and put Mallory back in her high chair.
"Why aren't you having dinner with Addison?" she asked taking a bite of a steamed carrot.
"She's having dinner with an old friend." He answered spooning some of Mallory's strained meal into his mouth. He grimaced at the pungent taste. "Ugh, how do you eat this? How do you eat this?" he asked as Mallory grabbed his nose squeezing it.
"Sure she is." Meredith muttered stabbing at her chicken parm.
"Why would you say that?" Derek asked turning to face her.
"I hate to be the one to point it out to you but you have a loveless marriage. And what you're doing, stringing the both of us along, is just wrong."
"I don't have a loveless marriage." He said turning back to Mallory.
"Oh yeah, then why are you having sex with me and not her? Why do you bring Mallory and me dinner and diapers?" Derek picked Mallory up stroking her curly blonde hair.
"It's time for her bath." He replied leaving the kitchen. Meredith sighed and continued to eat her dinner alone, like most nights.
Derek found Meredith on the couch after he put Mallory to bed. She was eating spoonfuls of ice cream and had a bottle of tequila next to her. She saw Derek standing in the doorway staring at the elephant in the room.
"My favorite pair. Tequila and ice cream, rocky road preferably." Derek scooped the bottle up noticing it was unopened.
"There's no room for that in my life." She answered her eyes never leaving the television. He sighed taking a seat next to her and reaching for the remote. Too tired to protest Meredith let him flip through the channels. She put the ice cream down and watched Derek out the corner of her eye. He was tired his eyes said it all. The stubble on his face was growing fast, his usually kept hair was curly and untamed but it looked good. He just looked so tired and defeated.
"How's the house?" she asked deeming it a somewhat safe topic.
"It's good. Five bedrooms three and a half baths, with an amazing backyard for Mallory and Doc to run in." he smiled half-heartedly. Meredith nodded.
"Sounds great." She replied running a hand through her hair. She looked over at him and he caught her starring. Derek picked up her hand and kissed it barely smiling. Meredith pulled back focusing her gaze elsewhere.
"Why did you sleep with me?" she asked quietly. Derek sighed rubbing his eyes. The chirping of her cell phone intervened preventing Derek from answering. Meredith sighed flipping it open.
"Hello?"
"Hey Meredith." Mike spoke into the phone.
"Hi Mike." She smiled twirling her hair on her finger. Derek noticed the schoolgirl behavior and strained his ear trying to hear Mike's part of the conversation.
"What are you up to?" he asked her.
"Oh nothing just watching some television. What are you doing?" Meredith flirted back.
"I was just walking through my apartment and you came to mind. I really had a great time talking with you at the bar."
"Me too." She replied sincerely. It was nice being attracted to someone who had no previous knowledge of your past and current relationships.
"So why don't you let me take you out for dinner sometime?" he pressed.
"I don't know." Meredith said stealing a glance at Derek. His jaw line was tight and his body language was tense a sure sign that he was jealous.
"Mike, I'm really busy for the next few weeks why don't you call me back later and we'll try and plan something."
"I could do that or I could keep calling you. It's more romantic this way." He laughed.
"Goodnight Mike."
"Goodnight Meredith." She closed the phone and looked over at Derek who was still obviously upset about her little phone conversation. The nerve of him! How did he think she felt whenever he kissed Addison right in front of her or used little pet names like "sweetie"
or "hun"?
"What is your problem?" she asked.
"Nothing don't let me keep you from Mike." He replied flipping through some more channels.
"You find anything you like?"
"No, but apparently you have." Derek muttered.
Meredith stood up livid about his little comment. "Get out of my house." She yelled.
"Meredith?"
"You are impossible, you sleep with me once knocking me up and you still stay with your wife. You sleep with me again you don't want to discuss it but get mad when another man takes interest in me. You want me but don't want anyone else to want me, and to top it off you refuse to leave your wife. Talk about having your cake and eating it too. So I'm gonna ask you again, what is your problem?" Meredith finished.
Derek sighed opening his mouth to speak. He stood up, "It's complicated."
"No. Not really." Derek brought his hand to touch and she grabbed it pulling it away from her face.
"You should leave before you do anything you regret." He sighed again and grabbed his coat walking to the front door.
"I never regretted a moment when we were together." Derek said softly and turned to leave.
Pulling up to his trailer Derek surveyed the construction of his house. It really was a beautiful home. He thought that he should name it like Monticello or something; it was sitting on all of this land that was as big as the Kennedy compound in Hyannis Port. There was an unfamiliar car still parked near the site, 'Must be on of the guys working late', he thought pulling his key out of the ignition. He walked up to the trailer listening to the sounds of Addison's laughter. Derek had to admit the sound of her laugh was a sign of her being happy something he wasn't use to which kind of made him happy. She must have been watching Conan or talking to a friend from Manhattan. He entered the trailer and was met with the all to familiar scene of a man's jacket that wasn't his. In fact it was a very familiar jacket that belonged to his ex best friend. He picked it up and made his way to the bedroom there he stopped dead in his tracks as he caught glimpses of their naked entangled limbs. Addison was the first to see him out the corner of her eye.
"Derek!" she said quickly clutching the sheet to her chest. He threw the jacket at the owner shaking his head in anger.
"Mark, I believe this is yours."