Welcome to the chapter known as 'Darkness'!
Before I begin, I would like to give someone a very warm 'thank you'. She's one of this site's newest members, and my newest source of inspiration! She's a cool cat that goes by the name of 'Dejichan', and she came to me in my time of need. I was really worried about this story yesterday, but she restored my confidence. I've brought tears to someone's eyes; making someone happy is all I want to do. When she reviewed, I was so happy that I broke out into song!
I'm still going up against the big dogs here, but things have turned exciting! I'm going to put my heart and soul in this, you can count on it! Here we go!
Oh, and before I pull apart the curtain, let me say that I know I'm hinting towards a Hiro/Shuichi pairing...but just wait and see Eiri's side to all of this! The finale is going to rock your world! Enjoy!
By the way, I'm still not accepting flames. I never will.
'Lost Novelist', 'Like We Never Loved At All' and 'A New Member of the Household' are hot Gravitation fics. Read them and other Gravi works! Read them all and have a ball! I told you all I'm excited...hee hee...
Themes of 'Darkness': 'I Need Some Sleep' by Eels (Shrek2 OST), 'About Her' from Kill Bill 2, 'Mystical Princess' by Masashi Hamauzu (Musashiden 2 Blademaster OST), 'Winterlight' by Tim Finn and 'Where' by Lisbeth Scott (Chronicles of Narnia OST)
'The course of true love never did run smooth'-Shakespeare
It was cold. Too cold.
The concept of sleep was a distant, foreign concept; a concept he had been familiar with for the longest time. The thick, frosty air refused to permit peaceful slumber, and his heart refused to stop pounding against its darkened prison. Relentless winds soared throughout the never-ending night; their power grew and grew with each passing minute, and minutes were no different from years. He could hear the winds laughing at him, and he knew the darkness was mocking him. It had come back to haunt him, to tear away the one world he had fallen into.
His bed, which had once been warm with the energy of a certain star, was now a bed of the blackest ice. His blankets provided no warmth; it was as if the entire world was laughing at him. Everything was cold...too cold for human contact. Silence was also abundant, and it was tearing his fragile heart apart. Darkness, silence and ice were tearing him to shreds, each of them bearing their own maniacal laughter...each of them bearing their own triumph, their own sadistic knowledge.
Midnight came in a flash, even though time had come to a complete stop. His eyes were still open, and he felt as if he had just entered his bed mere moments ago. The one that was usually near him was no longer on the face of the planet; that fact battered him every second of his life. His heart wouldn't stop its screaming...the laptop was on his desk...the blankets were as cold as ice...
Every minute felt like a YEAR.
Just a few moments ago, his life had been a party filled with vibrant smiles, innocent embraces and passionate kisses. Sure, it was a chaotic life, but it was a life that offered immeasurable bliss. Shuichi had cared for him, loved him...the young one had given him pure, unconditional love. Some saw the vocalist's devotion as 'infatuation', but the young one knew he cared for the novelist deeply...and wanted to spend the rest of his life caring for him. He had done so much for Yuki: he never failed to give Yuki good morning hugs, always made breakfast (even though he knew he was nowhere near being a gourmet chef), and wished him the best of luck on his novels. The young one's smiles were warmer than the brightest of sunrises, and he never failed to give the novelist any.
Hiro's words were true. Shuichi had given Yuki everything he could have wanted...and now...
...Shuichi was gone.
Fifteen minutes elapsed...and not a single minute brought any relief. The world became colder as time passed, and not a shred of hope could be seen in the midst of the darkness. Everything was in the embrace of icy sorrow...and there seemed to be no end to the pain in sight. Tears tore themselves out of his eyes as he desperately tried to rest, but the embrace of sleep was nowhere near him; even the concept of sleep was laughing at him. He had given up the most priceless treasure, and the entire world knew it.
Two minutes.
It was now seventeen minutes past midnight. Sleep was not going to fall upon him; that was now written in stone. He was restless, far too uncomfortable for peace...and his heart wouldn't stop screaming. Everything was just...too cold.
He removed his cell phone from his pocket, opened it and looked upon its small monitor. The message he wanted to see didn't make itself known; instead, the usual messages were on his monitor, and they instilled even more pain into him. He didn't have any missed calls; not a single soul had called him during the last couple of hours...
After another eternity of silence, he pressed the number '3'...and waited.
He received an answer...but it was not the answer he wanted to hear.
"We're sorry, but the user you are trying to reach is no longer available. We apologize for the inconvenience."
He became excruciatingly lightheaded, and his entire body lost all of its moisture. Sadness struck him in the form of a thunderbolt and caused him to become viciously dizzy, even though he was under the covers of his bed.
He would have preferred hearing Shuichi's voicemail message.
The young star's cell phone was off.
That fact struck him instantly, and it bore the ferocity of a million blades. The world around him became even colder as he thought of something; Shuichi never turned his cell phone off. If he wanted his phone to be silent, he placed it on 'vibration' mode...but he never turned it completely off.
Lightning threw itself against his house as he closed his cell phone...and buried himself beneath his blankets. His world had turned itself inside out in one swoop, and he was unable to adjust to the horrific changes that had been made. He was unable to do so because he refused to do so; he wanted to see Shuichi's smile. He didn't want to think of the young vocalist in the middle of the horrendous storm; he wanted him to be safe, warm and happy.
He wanted Shuichi to know the truth.
Time continued to attack him, and failed to bring any relief. Every passing second gave birth to venomous pain...and the slow passage of time caused everything to become colder. The silent novelist wandered through a dark tunnel of pain for what felt like an eternity, then he rose from his place. His body became intolerably heavy as soon as he rose to his feet; every piece of his body became a brick of steel. Silence continued to torment him as he scanned his room, feeling as if he had been placed in a new, inhospitable world. Everything, with the exception of the new laptop, was strange to him; the world he had locked himself in was no longer his world. The pictures on the walls, the papers, the files, the bottles of beer...none of it belonged to him. The change in his life had thrown him into a foreign world, a world he no longer wanted to be a part of.
The name of his star left his lips in a painful, mournful whisper...but he received no answer. The entire world was lost in silence; it was as if he had spent the previous months of his life in a jubilant dream. He was now in the middle of an unbreakable nightmare, and nothing seemed real. Even the ground beneath his feet was inhospitable; everything about him was no longer suitable for human contact. It was all so cold...so very cold...
Hours passed with the potency of years, and a new day broke out over his home. However, the darkness refused to leave; the sun was completely blocked from its normal shift. The skies were still black with rain, and the storm was still raging on. There seemed to be no end to the storm in sight, for its power was wild and uncontrollable. It was as if the night had never ended.
He had never been in the midst of an endless night before, and he had no desire to embrace his first one. Disgust and hatred struck his heart as he decided to withdraw from his foreign chambers. He no longer had the desire to rest; he was beyond restless, and he no longer wanted to be in the midst of strange objects. He took one last look at the horrendous objects...then took one last look at the laptop, which he had placed on the table. It was certainly a top-of-the-line laptop; it must have cost a fortune. It was the best of the best, the cream of the crop...and his Shuichi had purchased it for him.
Tears dashed into his eyes, but they were immediately wiped away. He knew he couldn't succumb to his emotions; doing so would render him immobile. Now was not the time to sink into sorrow...even though he desperately wanted to.
He closed the door of his bedroom and made his way down the stairs, trying to ignore the cheerful displays of Christmas bliss. There were strings of lights on the stairs, and they tried their best to make him smile...but their attempts crumbled miserably, for he truly had no desire to sink into pain. The very thought of Christmas stirred up Shuichi's name; the young star was the essence of Christmas.
Voices entered his ears. They belonged to K, Ark, Reiji and Tohma. Yuuji, Hiro and Suguru were nowhere in sight; Yuuji and Suguru were trying their hardest to calm the worried Hiro, who had failed to get even a second of sleep. Shuichi's dearest friend was trapped in the middle of immeasurable anger and sorrow; rivers were causing his body to tremble, but his eyes were bright with frustration. Yuki painfully remember the blow Hiroshi had delivered to him, and knew that Shuichi's friend had no desire to even think about him.
Tohma Seguchi was the first one to spot the silent novelist. The softhearted member of Nittle Grasper gasped, and his gentle eyes widened in sorrow. The others ceased their conversation and followed his gaze. Silence returned to the living room for a moment as Yuki gazed into the faces of his guests. Each of them bore their own set of emotions; Tohma's, of course, was a painting of sadness, Reiji had the look of a fretful mother about her, Ark looked as if he had lost his puppy in the middle of the night, and K carried the anger of a disgusted father. Silence tormented them for another eternity, then Tohma gently broke the silence.
"It's nice to see that you have awakened. How are you feeling?"
"Like I've been dragged through Hell." was the bitter, sorrowful answer. A frown broke out on Tohma's face, and his gentle heart plummeted into a dark pit of pain. Yuki continued after a moment of silence, even though the concept of speech was as foreign as sleep had been.
"I see we're all in the same boat."
K nodded and folded his arms. "I couldn't have said that better myself, Prince Charming."
The tone of Shuichi's manager caused the taste of poisonous guilt to enter Yuki's mouth.
"I tried to come into contact with Shindou at eleven o'clock last night, but here's the thing. His cell phone's been deactivated. I came to two possibilities. He's either really pissed off at you, or something big has gone down. I'm edging towards thesecond possibility, since I know Shindou well. He probably wants you rubbed off the face of the earth, but he wouldn't keep us in the dark."
K was not in the best of moods; that was evident. Several hours ago he had been in the shoes of a valiant, benevolent chieftain; now he was in the role of an angered father. He was still a vigilant beacon of guidance; he had just unwittingly thrown himself in Hiro's parade of hatred. An entire night of suffering didn't exactly bring the brightest of smiles, and anger had the power to tear anyone apart.
"We all called around. Tohma came into contact with your sister. Fujisaki and Ark contacted members of the other bands. Reiji contacted all medical institutions, and I even called my family. None of them picked up anything up from Shindou."
None of them.
The Shindou had fallen off the face of the planet.
"All of them, with the exception of Mika of course, are going to meet us here in a few hours. They've decided to help us in our quest for the missing vocalist."
A smile fell onto K's face, but it wasn't a pleasant one. It wasn't the smile one had at a tea party; it was the smile of a deceitful, merciless lion.
"Do you know what time it is?"
Tohma's heart fell further into sadness, and it carried Reiji's heart with it. The air became immoderately heavy with sorrow...it was almost impossible to breathe...
Yuki took one look at his watch.
It was twelve in the afternoon.
The novelist's knees became dangerously weak, and his chest became tight. The air became thicker as he struggled for the power to breathe, but he no longer had the strength to comprehend the boundaries of reality...for he was lost in the most horrific nightmare. Tears dashed into his eyes once again, and he allowed them to strike the floor as his heart resumed its crying.
There had to be another option. There had to be someone else they could contact.
Ten seconds passed in the form of ten years, then Yuki's heart leapt with urgent desperation. His eyes became wide pictures of desperate hope, and his heart began to pound against his chest heavily...
"Wait! Hold on a minute!"
Tohma's gentle eyes fell into his, filled with profound winds of sadness. "What is it, Yuki-sama?" he asked his dearest companion, noting the look of urgency on the novelist's face. Yuki had apparently uncovered one last lifeline, and he was determined to use it. He swept the hearts of the others into fragile hope with his newborn discovery.
"We've got one chance left. Just hold on a minute, all right?"
"What in the hell are you doing?" K asked him sternly, but his tone didn't emit impatience; it emitted a stream of curiosity. Yuki didn't answer him in words; his movements gave him the answer he needed. All eyes kept themselves glued to the novelist as he hurriedly whipped out his cell phone and pressed a number...
"Don't tell me you're trying to reach Shuichi again, Yuki." Ark said in frustration, his eyes filled with sorrow and helplessness. To him, Yuki was a desperate magician that wanted to use the same magic trick to save his show, but the novelist's intentions weren't clear to him at all. Tohma placed a gentle hand on Ark's shoulder, silently asking him to be patient with his soft eyes.
Silence tormented all of them for thirty seconds, then-
"Tatsuha!"
Tohma's eyes widened and a hopeful gasp tore itself from his heart. He exchanged glances with Reiji, who bore a facial expression that was similar to his. K and Ark exchanged vigilant glances with each other. All of them waited and listened...all of them hoped for some sign of relief...
"Yes, it's me, damn it. Listen. I want to know if you heard anything from Shuichi last night."
The answer was an answer of soft frustration and shock.
"I haven't heard from him in three days, bro. Please don't tell me you two had an argument!"
Yuki's heart fell; his plunge into sorrow made itself known on his face. Sorrow darted back into his eyes and tried to etch itself into his voice, but he refused to let his voice break. His heart dragged the hearts of the others with it; the last chance for relief fell apart miserably. His lifeline had failed.
"Sheesh! He gave you the world and you scared him off. Way t' go, Eiri."
Yuki's voice became a deadly, venomous blade of crimson red fire. He was on the verge of tears; his chest wanted to explode, and his eyes were burning...but he decided to release his sorrow in the form of frustration. "Look." he snapped. His voice would have brought a cobra to tears.
"I'm in no mood for your bullshit, Tatsuha. I've got enough grief on my hands, so don't toy with me."
The tone of Yuki's voice would have damaged a child for life. It shocked Tatsuha immensely; he had never heard his brother's voice take on such a fatal tone before. Something had torn Shuichi away from his brother, and now Eiri's world had taken on a whole new color; all of that was perfectly clear. A moment of silence passed between them before he regained enough strength to speak, then he took on the tone of a true, concerned brother.
"When did Shuichi disappear, Eiri?"
A huge lump developed in Yuki's chest.
His voice became soft and shaky. It frightened Tatsuha, for he didn't believe that Yuki had the ability to speak at a soft, fragile level. It was as if his brother had transformed into another person...a person that was sad enough to break his heart. The words Tatsuha received from him sent an arrow through his heart, and caused his eyes to widen in fear.
"I don't know."
Even though Tatsuha was miles away, he fell into their newborn world of rain. Sorrow pierced his peaceful day and shattered the boundaries of his routines...filling him with inexplicable dread. His brother was beyond worried, Shuichi was apparently nowhere around...something big had happened last night, and that 'something' had torn his brother's world apart.
Tatsuha was normally a cheerful, talkative individual...but now he was at a complete loss for words. He wanted to offer some kind of comfort, but not a single bit could be found...for the explosion of sorrow was just too great to overcome. An eternity passed between the two brothers, then Yuki spoke, increasing the newborn pain of Tatsuha's heart.
"Look. I don't know when he fell into oblivion. I don't know where he went, I don't know where he could have gone...I don't know anything. All I know is...I want him back. I..."
The lump became bigger, and tears tumbled out of his eyes. His voice became hoarse.
"...I want him to come back. I don't know where he is."
The dam was no longer strong enough to hold anything back.
Yuki fell to his knees and buried his face in his hands. Pain exploded in his chest, rivers tore themselves from his eyes, and his body became insufferably heavy. He no longer had enough strength to hold anything back, and so he decided to allow everything free passage. His body released enough tears to drown him, every part of him burned and burned...
No one of them were able to acknowledge this, but the outbreak of sadness brought all of them closer to each other. They were going to become even closer...but none of them knew that yet...
Yuki's newborn sorrow brought Reiji to tears. She had never seen the novelist on his knees, and thought he was perfectly incapable of showing any sign of emotion. To her, listening to him cry was no different from watching a dying puppy whimper.
Ark and K felt their hearts fall into disbelief, for they too had believed Yuki to be incapable of displaying emotions. The beliefs of the past caused them to feel ashamed of themselves; both of them knew how deadly assumptions were, and yet they had made the novelist out to be a stone-hearted monster. Both of them exchanged glances with other as their bodies became heavy from exhaustion and sadness. K's eyes became the soft, sorrowful eyes of a gentle father; his best friend took on the look of a mournful child. Tohma joined all of them in their sorrow, but he had made no assumptions about Yuki; he knew the novelist was a fragile as a newborn sheep. The gentle hearted Seguchi made his way to the stairs and placed his arms about his brokenhearted companion, feeling rivers wrench themselves out of his own eyes.
Silence tortured all of them for another eternity, then Tatsuha spoke. His voice was very gentle; it was the voice of a comforting mother.
"Listen to me. I'll help you find Shuichi. Everything's gonna be okay, so stop your crying; it's scaring me. Trust me, okay?"
Silence.
"I'll be there soon. Everything's gonna be fine, bro. Don't worry."
The call came to an end.
Tohma tightened his embrace on Yuki, and Yuki placed his arms around him. The novelist had failed to find any relief, and was hungry for comfort. Their tears tied them together in a bond that would never be broken...and held them in an endless world of night. Time slowly drew itself by them...as all of them became closer in the midst of pain...
"I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry, Shuichi..."
"Sssshh. Everything's going to be all right. Sssshhh."
Their world became an abyss of dark sorrow...as tears tore themselves from their eyes. Reiji broke into soft sobs as she listened to Tohma comforting whispers...Hiroshi Nakano entered the room and felt his heart shatter...and Yuuji lowered his head, his own eyes filled with tears. Silence tormented all of them for another long eternity...then Claude K.Winchester, who was known as 'K', dialed a number that brought even more tears to everyone's eyes.
"Hey there. It's me, K. Yeah, I'd like to file a missing person's report on someone. Goes by the name of Shuichi Shindou."
-I'd like to dedicate this chapter to my newest pal, Dejichan. Thank you, once again, for restoring my hope in this.
Tohma's support is going to be explained soon, so no worries! I hope all of you enjoyed this, and thanks to everyone!