I wrote this so quick and crappy… dammit.
781 words! I'm writing more!
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Guilt
Sometimes Sasuke would lie awake, his body aching from continuous training, his head pounding from exhaustion, and his eyes burning from overuse. Yet, he wouldn't fall asleep. He made himself think of home, and he reminded himself of what he had given up, just how important getting stronger was, and what he could return to when he finally succeeded. Sasuke was punishing himself for not being strong enough to do this on his own that he had to run away to find someone to teach him.
He thought about different things each time. Sometimes he remembered events in the past, most good, some bad. Sometimes he imagined his homecoming or, more likely, the day when his former team caught up and dragged him home by force. Sometimes he just thought about one person. Sakura had changed from they had first been put on a team. Sasuke wondered how much she had changed since then, especially since there were whispers that the Godaime Hokage had taken in an apprentice. She would be strong and very skilled, especially since Sakura had always had the best chakra control. Yet still, when they met up again, Sakura would not be enough to give him a good fight. Kakashi was rarely on his mind, mostly because the teacher was an enigma. They had trained together for a month, Kakashi had pulled Sasuke in line whenever he was getting out of control, but still, Kakashi was nothing but a teacher. Sasuke would love the day he could fight and beat Kakashi. Naruto plagued his mind. Thoughts of the blond infested every thought Sasuke had. No matter who Sasuke was thinking of, Naruto showed up, the infernal idiot who couldn't learn when to just stop, when he should give up, and when he was going to die. Sasuke hated thinking that he would no longer be there to watch Naruto's back and make sure the idiot didn't get killed accidentally.
Naruto couldn't die before they met again, Sasuke knew that couldn't happen. Because when Sasuke finished his training and accomplished his goal, he was going straight back to Konoha and gluing himself to Naruto's side. The blond wouldn't be allowed anywhere unless Sasuke was there. The loneliness, the quietness, and somber mood that permeated through Otogakure was almost too much sometimes. Sasuke was kept underground mostly, he was hidden from other people as Orochimaru's future body, and the few people he did see never liked to spend more time than was necessary in his presence. They had all heard the stories. Uchiha Sasuke was so consumed by his need for strength that he was willing to sacrifice the best friend he had. Imagine what someone like that would do to a nobody who just pissed him off.
Sasuke hated it when he thought of that, because it was true, he had been that consumed, and fighting with Naruto hadn't helped any, especially as he saw Naruto just continue to get stronger and stronger during their match. Orochimaru had explained it to him: Kyuubi. He had learned how the demon was sealed inside of Naruto's body, how Naruto could use that chakra, how the whole village feared and hated the blond, and most of all, how no one knew what kind of long term effects would occur. Kabuto thought it was fascinating. Would the demon eventually break free? Would it merge with Naruto to much that Naruto began to lose himself? Or would the demon be trapped there, unwillingly lending its power? What kind of effects would that have on Naruto? Would he live forever? Would he die young? And what happened when Naruto died?
Sasuke hated thinking about it. All the worst scenarios popped into his mind: Naruto being overcome by the Kyuubi and someone needing to kill him; well that someone would not be Sasuke. He'd had his chance to kill Naruto, and he let it go, he did not want a second shot at it.
Orochimaru also taught Sasuke about Akatsuki. And their plans for Naruto and the other jinchuuriki.
Sasuke knew he had to kill Itachi before the traitor got to Naruto, because then avenging the clan would all be forgotten, all that would be on his mind would be avenging Naruto.
Sasuke needed to make amends with Naruto; he needed to show Naruto that he made a mistake, and that he was sorry for it. He needed Naruto to forgive him. He needed to somehow get rid of the guilt, because why else would the idiot be on his mind at all hours of the day. He just hoped that when he went home he finally be able to stop obsessing over the blond.
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A/N This spiraled out of control… I don't even remember what I had originally had in mind for this story, just something about Sasuke thinking about home. It wasn't supposed to turn out to have this much SasuNaru.
