Too much of dad's love could be scary.
Mob loved her dad, she really did, but sometimes…sometimes she loved him not as much as she should have. Like when he was keeping her up all night…and when she was telling her how to play her game. She wanted to play WITH him and not FOR him but he didn't seem to understand that difference. Or maybe she just wasn't making herself clear. She didn't know. She was too tired to know.
"Mob? Hey? Wake up!" Minegishi snapped their fingers in her face. Oh. She'd fallen asleep. She had fallen asleep sitting in the lunchroom chair…and now her back kind of hurt. Not as bad as dad's though. His back had hurt a lot last night…probably because he hunched when he sat and also he was kind of old.
"No, let her sleep. She's little and little people need all the sleep they can get." Said Shibata
"She's ten, not two. Mob, come on, you're not supposed to sleep here. I swear to God is Shimazaki gave you anything I am going to murder him." said Minegishi. Mob opened her eyes. She didn't want anyone to get murdered on her account. She had already gotten him beaten up. She didn't want him dead too.
"Hey, the worst thing I've given her is my pen. That's it. Well that and also some sake but that wasn't today. You don't have to blame me for everything you know." Said Shimazaki. Mob was too tired to ask him why he had to tell Minegishi all of that stuff. They hated it when she drank and smoked, they said that they didn't want to ruin her life and stuff, but Mob had to. Dad loved her now more than he ever had at any point in her life…and too much of his love was just….not good.
"I can and I will." Said Minegishi
"You are pretty much the only usual suspect." Said Shibata
"I don't have to sit here and take this. I can eat lunch wherever I want to." Said Shimazaki
"Alright then. Goodbye." Said Minegishi with a wave. Shimazaki didn't go anywhere though. He just picked up his spork and went back to eating.
"I can go wherever I choose and I choose to be here." Said Shimazaki
"Can you choose to be quiet?" asked Minegishi
"I choose to not be quiet." Said Shimazaki
"Well can you choose to choose to-" said Minegishi
"Wait, can you guys go back to the beginning. You lost me." Said Shibata scratching his head. Shimazaki reached over and took his cookie while he wasn't looking. Mob used her powers to put it back. That would start a fight. The last thing she wanted right now…or even…was a fight. She was too tired to deal with that and even if she wasn't tired then she still would not have wanted her friends to fight and stuff.
"Please….don't fight." Said Mob. She was tired. She was too tired to have people fighting. She just…she needed to sleep but she wasn't going to sleep since this would probably be the only time that she got to see her friends all day. Dad had been so weird lately. He never wanted to spend this much time with her before. Maybe he was making up for all the time that he had missed out on before…and also maybe he was spending extra time with her because he wasn't spending any time with Sho…even though Sho was his kid too.
Sho was so lucky.
He was having lunch with Fukuda. He was mad that she and dad had taken over the whole Minecraft world even though Sho had said a thousand times at least that the game was way too boring and stuff. Mob didn't know what he was so upset about. Playing Minecraft with dad was no fun at all. He was way too bossy and stuff. He was bossy and also he didn't need a lot of sleep, it seemed, and he didn't care if she got tired or not. Maybe he was scared of dying in his sleep. That was a thing that happened…and Mob wished that he hadn't told her about that. She had been alive for ten whole years without knowing about that and now that she knew she couldn't un-know. So now she had something new to worry about in addition to Sho being upset, all the school work that she hadn't done, her friends fighting with each other, and also how they had mined up all the obsidian is seemed. Also she broke another diamond pickaxe and those weren't easy to craft.
She needed a drink.
She took a drink of coffee. Plain coffee. Dad had gotten her a bunch of travel mugs. She was using the Elsa one. She liked Elsa. She knew that Elsa would have been happy to spend time with her dad considering the fact that he had died and all. Elsa would have been happy that her dad accepted her and was proud of her powers and didn't make her wear gloves and stuff. Mob should have been happy that dad loved her now more than he ever had before. She should have been happy that she had dad's attention. Hid good attention. Not the kind of attention he gave Sho…when he even got dad's attention. She should have been happy.
But mostly she was just tired.
"Mob, what's wrong with you today? Talk to me." Said Minegishi. Mob made her eyes stay opened and even though she really just wanted to get some sleep. She wanted to go to her own bed, well the bed that was in the room that she shared with Sho, and just get some sleep already….but she knew that she couldn't. Dad had barely let her out of his sight to go and eat lunch. He wouldn't let her just go home on her own and stuff. He used to leave her alone all the time.
What had changed?
He had been weird since he had come back from the mission he had been on back during the summer time. Back when baby Mukai had lived with them and dad had gone somewhere else and she had to be the President. He had come back and had just been so…weird. And getting weirder. She wondered if eventually he would just go full circle. She could not imagine dad getting any weirder than he was now. He was only weird to her, too, and not to Sho…even though Sho was a boy and he was a boy so then by that logic Sho should have been the one who he hung out with.
But he didn't like Sho. He liked her.
"I'm sleepy. My dad wouldn't let me go to sleep last night because we were playing Minecraft….but it's ok. He made coffee." Said Mob. She picked up her travel mug and took a sip. Very bitter. More than usual. Dad mostly knew about making tea and that was….ok. This was ok.
"Should you be drinking coffee? You're so little….but then again you might stay little forever…" said Shibata
"I can drink whatever I want to….drink….and stuff." Said Mob. She wanted to put her head down and go to sleep. It was pasta for lunch today with red sauce. She wanted to just rest her head in her pasta and close her eyes…but she wasn't so tired that she was going to get pasta and sauce all over herself like a baby. Well like Sho had when he had been a baby. That was a nice picture. Sho had been such a cute baby. There weren't any pictures of her as a baby. Dad said
"There's nothing in that coffee, right?" asked Minegishi as they took her travel mug out of her hands and took a sip from it. That was ok. Best friends could share germs like that.
"Irish coffee?" asked Shimazaki. He tried to take the travel mug from Minegishi's hands but they pulled it away. That was good. She and Shimazaki weren't best friends so they couldn't share germs…even though Minegishi kissed him all the time…so was drinking from the same cup as Minegishi the same as kissing Shimazaki? She hoped that it wasn't. He was the last boy in the whole world that she wanted to kiss.
She smiled a little.
She could feel his aura. The first boy in the world that she wanted to kiss. She hadn't been able to see him as often as she had before….which wasn't good because he was finally hanging out with her more and stuff….but he was coming right towards her now. That was good. Even if she was super tired she would always be happy to see him.
"Starbucks coffee….so it's from America I think…and also can Hatori sit with us? We have room but I think that the polite thing to do would be to ask everyone. Especially Minegishi since he bothers them." Said Mob
"That guy's been bothering you, Toshi?" asked Shimazaki in a tone that Mob couldn't place. His aura was all pulled in close around him, now, and also it was reaching towards Minegishi's. They didn't really seem to notice.
"He wants to be friends with Minegishi, I think. He's always asking about them and stuff. Like what they like to read and do for fun and what their favorite color is and stuff like that. I think that he wants to make friends with all of us and stuff but he's just asking about us one at a time." Said Mob. It would make sense to get to know everyone one at a time. That way it would be a little less overwhelming than meeting everyone at once. People could be a little bit overwhelming sometimes.
"Did he actually say that? Out loud? That he wanted to be friends with Toshi?" asked Shimazaki
"No but he's always talking to Minegishi when we all hang out together and stuff and asking about them so I figured that he wanted to be their friend. He's already my friend and I want him to be everyone's friend. We could always use more friends." Said Mob
"You know, Toshi, if this guy's been bothering you I can kick his ass. You won't even have to lift a finger. I know how you feel about extra work." Said Shimazaki
"Pass. I can fight my own battles. I don't need you or anyone else to come and save me. Now back to what Mob was saying about Suzuki not letting her go to bed-" said Minegishi. Mob didn't want to talk about that since there was nothing even to talk about. She was tired because dad hadn't let her go to bed. That was all. She would much rather talk about Hatori. He was much more interesting than she was. He was the most interesting boy in the whole world it felt like sometimes.
"I know you can, I know full well that you can, but-" said Shimazaki
"No, no buts. If I have a problem with someone then I can just deal with them myself. Ok? And he's not even bothering me, he's just an annoying kid, that's all. I have no problem with him sitting here, ok Mob? He can sit here until he dies of old age if he leaves me alone…and also can we please talk about what the hell you just said about the very troubling but of information that you just shared with the group, Mob?" asked Minegishi
"Oh? About coffee? I don't know how troubling it is that Starbucks is from America. I think so, that it's from America, so that's where this coffee came from. It's not Irish." Said Mob
"I think they grow coffee in South America, though." said Shibata
"That's an America." Said Mob
"Yeah but that's not the America you were talking about. Starbucks started in Seattle way back when. I've been to the original Starbucks. It's not special. I don't get you guys. There's so much better coffee in the world, you know, like this place down by where I get my tattoos done. Always just the right temperature, never burnt, goes down real easy. Better than that shit you and Toshi drink. We should go there sometime." Said Shimazaki
"My dad doesn't let me go anywhere anymore." Said Mob. She poked at her food with her fork. She would never go anywhere that dad didn't go to and she wouldn't do anything that dad didn't want her to do. She should have been happy that dad loved her, that she had so much of his love and stuff, but mostly she was just tired.
Dad could be a very tiresome person sometimes.
"Mob, what did you mean by-" said Minegishi
"Me and Toshi, then." Said Shimazaki
"I'd like to come with you gu-" said Shibata
"Me and Toshi. Then." Said Shimazaki. He and Shibata looked at each other for a while. Shibata lost the staring contest. Though Mob didn't think that it had been a fair contest to begin with since Shibata had been the only one doing the staring. Shimazaki stole his cookie back after he turned away. Mob put it back on Shibata's tray where it belonged.
"You want to get a cup of coffee with me?" asked Minegishi. There was something in their tone, too, and Mob was too tired to figure out what all of these different tones meant and looks and aura and…and she just wanted to go to sleep. She just wanted to move her tray to the side and put her head down and go to sleep…but she couldn't. The lunchroom was not a bedroom, first of all, and second of all Hatori was standing sort of behind their table and he might have been deciding if he wanted to eat with them or not. Mob didn't want to put any pressure on him.
Even though there was a free chair right next to her.
He looked different today. Less shiny. His hair was combed, too, and he had on a new sweater. This one had a rose on it. She missed his cat sweaters. He had on new pants today, too, even though the ones he had on yesterday weren't that dirty. They were new from the store new, not new to her, she could tell because they weren't worn in yet. His fingers weren't red or orange or any color at all, either.
She still liked him even though he looked very different.
She wasn't so tired that her heart wasn't going to go doki doki and stuff. She wasn't so tired that she couldn't imagine him sitting next to her and holding her hand and telling her that when they were the same age he wanted to ask her to be his girlfriend and stuff…which she should not have been imagining since she was sitting with her friends now and these were not the things to imagine while sitting there with your friends and stuff.
"I mean, if you want to. I know how you like coffee and we don't, you know, do a lot together. Outside of work I mean." Said Shimazaki. Mob didn't know why Minegishi's aura was being the way it was. That sounded like it would be a nice time…the sort of thing that she would have liked to do…before dad got all weird and stuff.
"We live together. How is that not doing a lot together? Honestly." Said Minegishi
"I know but that's not the same. We used to hang out together more." Said Shimazaki
"That was before we lived together." Said Minegishi
"I know but still, I had fun, and I thought that you did too." Said Shimazaki
"Your idea of fun is not sitting and drinking coffee for hours on end." Said Minegishi
"Hey, I like coffee as much as the next guy. Like that guy. The one that's been standing there and eavesdropping. The one that smells like Lynx and nacho cheese Doritos." Said Shimazaki
"Never mind him. That's just Mob's friend…and no, I will not get a cup of coffee with you. I'll get one with Mob but she's good company. I always know where I stand with her." Said Minegishi
"….is this still about coffee?" asked Mob. She got the feeling that they weren't talking about coffee anymore….but she had no idea what it was that they could have been talking about besides coffee. People sometimes said something totally different from what they meant…and Mob was too tired to figure this whole thing out. She took another drink of coffee. She was so tired it was hardly helping.
"Yes. What else would it be about, Shimazaki? I know you. I know you and-" said Minegishi
"I just wanted to go to Starbucks with you. I didn't ask you to marry me. I just want to get a cup of coffee with you." Said Shimazaki
"WE have coffee at home." Said Minegishi. They seemed upset, now, and Mob didn't know why. She had no idea what was even going on but she wished that she did so she could just make everyone get along and stuff. She wanted nothing more than everyone's happiness…and also to sleep…
"I know but Shibata always makes it and he can't make a cup of coffee for shit." Said Shimazaki. Mob frowned. That wasn't a nice thing to say at all…even though she'd had his coffee before and it really wasn't very good at all…but then again it was all bitter to Mob. She didn't like coffee that much. It was more about hanging out with Minegishi and stuff.
"Hey, there's nothing wrong with my coffee." Said Shibata. He crossed his arms and looked away from Shimazaki. Mob knew what that face meant. Sho made that face sometimes when something was bothering him. She didn't want her friends to fight. She had enough going on and she didn't need her friends being upset with each other to be added on top of that.
"You burn it. You, somehow, managed to burn a liquid. You suck so bad at making coffee that you defy the laws of thermal dynamics." Said Shimazaki
"That's not a nice thing to say. Shibata's feelings could be hurt." Said Mob
"Shimazaki, come off it. I don't know what you're getting at but come off it. Ok? I don't know what you find so amusing about this but if you can't come off it then you can go be amused somewhere else. And you, back there, either sit down or don't your hovering is making me nervous. Shibata, get that look off your face it's not that bad. If he wanted to get to you he would have gone after more than your coffee making skills. Mob, tell me what happened with you and your dad." Said Minegishi. They fired off orders faster than even dad could. Mob hoped that he didn't end up getting jealous….or thinking that he needed to get better at giving out orders…
He was bossy enough as it was.
Mob wished that he would just be less…less bossy. Less weird and less bossy. But there was nothing that she could do about that. He was the way he was and she was the way she was and everything was the way it was. Mob couldn't change anything but she could at least be happy that she could have this time to sit with her friends and have lunch…even though she was tired.
Also Hatori was sitting next to her.
"Everyone, this is Hatori. He's mine and Minegishi's friend. He likes videogames and he works in tech support. Also he's wearing a new outfit today and it's very nice. Hatori this is Shibata and Shimazaki. They're friends with me and Minegishi. Shibata makes sure people don't kill my dad and so does Shimazaki." Said Mob. That was how you were supposed to introduce someone. She had done it right. She had said his name and what he liked to do and where he worked and something interesting. That was good manners. The internet had said so.
"Nice to meet you." Said Shibata. He reached over and shook Hatori's hand maybe a little bit too hard.
"Hey." Said Shimazaki. He wasn't looking at Hatori. He was looking, with his aura, at Minegishi, and Minegishi was looking away from him with their aura and Mob really hoped that they weren't fighting or anything like that.
"Back to Mob. What the hell is your dad on? Not letting you sleep?" asked Minegishi
"We were up all night playing Minecraft….he REALLY likes Minecraft." Said Mob. She rubbed her eyes and yawned. She wondered if they could actually get some sleep. She wondered if dad was planning on skipping sleep all together from now on…but didn't people need sleep to live? They'd find out. Mob wanted to go to sleep but also she didn't want to die in her sleep…because that was a thing that she had to worry about now…and stuff.
"No way. That's awesome that you and your dad can play together." Said Hatori
"Yes…it's great." Said Mob. She wasn't lying. This was everything that she had ever wanted. Dad liked something that she liked and they were spending time together. It was great. This was…it had been great. Dad's love was great. Everything was just so…it was great. It really was.
"Suzuki enjoys something? Is that possible?" asked Shibata
"Yes. My dad likes things. I don't know why people always get so surprised when I say that my dad likes things. He likes stuff…but I guess that he just doesn't like to show it…so that could be why people are always so surprised." Said Mob
"What the hell is Minecraft?" asked Shimazaki
"It's game where you mine things to craft with and you craft things to mine with…and also dad tells me what to do and when to do it and we stayed up all night and it was ok for a little bit because there was coffee and the coffee helped but not forever and now I'm very tired." Said Mob
"So that's why our world is so built up now. I thought that you and your brother were just really into it. That's so cool that you and your dad can hang out like that. Me and my dad used to play together too…back when I was your age." Said Hatori
"This may not be the best place to talk about your happy childhood." Said Minegishi. Mob nodded in agreement. She had no idea what Minegishi's parents had been like but she knew that they had been mean to them and also that the government made them live in a group home, which was like an orphanage, for a few years.
"Minegishi feels bad now. Please don't make Minegishi feel bad or you'll have to sit somewhere else…and I don't want you to have to sit somewhere else so please don't make Minegishi feel bad. Ok?" asked Mob. She tried her best not to yawn. She failed.
"Oh, shit, sorry. Sorry Minegishi-san. Like….I'm really sorry. I mean I know that I should have taken into account-" said Hatori
"Are you planning kowtowing too?" asked Minegishi
"Uh…do you want me to?" asked Hatori
"Would you kowtow if I asked you to?" asked Minegishi
"Um…yes?" asked Hatori. Mob didn't think that what Hatori had said had been bad enough, not bad at all he just didn't know, to make him have to kowtow on the dirty lunchroom floor. But then again she wasn't the one who was hurt, Minegishi was hurt, and she didn't get to tell someone else how to deal with the hurt that they were feeling.
"Don't kowtow, it's boring. Anyway Suzuki was giving up on his dreams of world domination to become a miner or something?" asked Shimazaki. His aura felt sort of….pointy…which was weird for him. Shibata was looking between Shimazaki and Minegishi. So was Hatori. Mob didn't get it at all. Why did people have to talk with their eyes and faces and auras and stuff? Why couldn't everyone just use their words and stuff? It would be a lot easier for people to understand one another if they all just used their words all the time.
"Um…no. We've been playing this videogame and dad really likes it. He likes it so much that we even stopped watching the Galaxy Express show…which I'm happy about because it's kind of long and stuff…and I'm happy that we're playing together, too, even though I'm sleepy. I like how dad loves me now and I like spending time with him and stuff. I just wish, sometimes, that he would be less…bossy…and also that we didn't have to stay up so late. But it's ok because I love him and he loves me and when your dad loves you then you're supposed to spend time with him. Like how Hatori spends time with his dad…well he did back when he was my age." Said Mob
"Wait…he made you stay up all night? Because me and my dad…well my dad never made me stay up. We stayed up together." Said Hatori
"That's the same thing." Said Mob
"No…it isn't. I could have gone to bed whenever I wanted to. Actually he was always asking me if I wanted to go to bed…because I was, like, ten." Said Hatori
"Wait, he asked you? Dads don't ask you things. They tell you things. They tell you what to do and then you do it because they're the dad and you're the kid." Said Mob. That made no sense. Dad asked her things sometimes, like what she wanted for dinner and stuff, but he never asked her what they were going to do together. He just told her what they were going to do together. That was how it worked when you had a dad and stuff.
"That's just how your dad is. My dad…he was a lot like your dad….well actually, no, he hated me…but he was similar in some ways. Everyone's different and everyone has different parents." Said Minegishi. They were making sense. Parents must have been as unique as people then. But there were some ways that they were supposed to act…right? The moms were nice all the time and the dads were sort of mean…but dad could be nice too….and sometimes mom could be mean…well only to her so that was ok…
Families could be complicated and Mob was too tired to think about that right now.
"I'm sorry that you dad hated you…that's very sad." Said Mob. Dad had never hated her and Sho. Well he loved her…he had told her more times lately than he had ever said it in his life…and he only disliked Sho a whole lot…not HATED him…but that was so mean that a parent could hate their child. She gave Minegishi her cookie. They hated sugar, and a cookie was no consolation for your parents hating you, but cookies were valuable in the lunchroom and they could trade for something else.
"Sugar is poison and I don't give a damn about my dad hating me, he and my mom are long dead and out of this world…but thanks for the gesture." Said Minegishi as they handed Mob back her cookie.
"If you don't want your cookie-" said Shibata
"She wants the damn cookie." Said Minegishi. Mob didn't like that. She already had dad telling her what she wanted and didn't want…but she didn't say anything. She wasn't about to be mean to her friend or anything like that.
"I want it but you can have it…what I really want is to go to bed, though. I'm sorry everyone. I'm just sleepy…and I want to go to bed." Said Mob. She closed her eyes and almost did go to bed when Minegishi shook her awake. She wondered if they thought that she had died, too, like dad had…and she wondered also how she had lived for ten whole years without knowing that people could just randomly die in their sleep and stuff.
"Want me to take you home. You look pretty bad…and this is coming from me. I haven't slept in two and a half days." Said Shimazaki
"Why have you been up for so long?" asked Mob
"Cok-" said Shiamzaki
"Nothing that you need to know about. Anyway instead of telling up that you're exhausted why don't you go and tell your dad? Tell him that you're exhausted and that you need to go home and take a nap because you're ten and you shouldn't be pulling all-nighters over some stupid game…I swear to God." Said Minegishi. Mob hoped that she hadn't made them mad. They were friends and friends were not supposed to be mad at one another.
"But…I don't tell dad what to do. He tells me what to do. That's why he's the dad and I'm the kid. If I try and tell him what to do then he might get…he might get mad at me…and I don't want him to be mad at me…" said Mob. Minegishi sighed.
"Mob…you never stick up for yourself…and you need to. Especially with him. Just….if he gets mad at you and he punishes you then…then I'll be here for you, alright?" asked Minegishi. Mob nodded.
"Ok. I'll…I'll try." Said Mob. She didn't want to make dad mad but she did want to get some sleep…and sleep was important…so she would talk to dad. Even though there was no talking to dad…but maybe there would be, now, since he had been so much nicer, lately. He loved her a lot…enough to stay up all night playing games with her and stuff…and he had even told her that he loved her…and she loved him too….and when you loved someone you wanted them to be happy…
Maybe he would say 'yes' since he loved her so much.