A/N: You guys are the best! Thanks for all the reviews and encouragment with regard to my own personal "journey" to have a baby. When things get really tough for me, I get on here and bury myself in writing this fic. It's my escape; it's a place where I can put a face to my feelings (Mac) and a place where I have complete control over how things play out. It's been very theraputic for me from day one, and the longer the story gets, the more theraputic it becomes for me.
Anyway, I have the next chapter ready to go, so even though I just posted a couple nights ago, I wanted to give you all a treat (at least I hope it's a treat!). Thanks once more to LadyCommish for her ideas, nudges and friendship. :)
Chapter 79:
Mattie took care of getting Ainsley up and changing her, and warmed up the last remaining bottle from the freezer before bringing both baby and bottle to the master bedroom. "Can you handle feeding her?" she asked Harm. "I didn't realize how late it was, I've gotta get ready to leave."
"Yeah, sure" he said, moving himself ever-so-carefully away from Mac so he wouldn't disturb her. "Thanks for taking care of this, kiddo" he said as he took Ainsley from her big sister.
"Not a problem" Mattie replied leaning in to kiss her father's cheek. "Dad?"
"Hmm?" he answered as he put the bottle to the baby's mouth.
"Can we talk later? You and me?"
"Of course" he replied. "Something wrong?"
"We'll talk later" she replied starting for the door. "Get some rest."
"I will" he said. "Have a good day. I love you."
"Love you too" she replied and was out the door.
Harm lay in the bed next to Mac and gave Ainsley her bottle. She still wasn't completely sure she liked it; she fussed and squirmed some but she took it fairly well. It wasn't until the phone rang that Mac stirred from her sound sleep.
"Ssh" he said, carefully reaching over to pat his wife's back. She needed to sleep some more; she was running on empty and he knew it. As the phone rang for the third time, he was able to get Ainsley down on his lap and reach over to grab the handset.
"Rabb's" he answered.
"Harm, its Sturgis" came the voice. "Where's Mac? We had a meeting twenty minutes ago and the General said she's not coming in today."
"She's not" answered Harm plainly. "She's off today because she's so tired she can barely function, and she needs to get some rest."
"Well we have a case that needs to be resolved" Sturgis replied. "She's being a bit hard nosed about it."
"Funny" said Harm, carefully reaching the bottle around to Ainsley's mouth again, "that's what she said about you."
Sturgis laughed. "I'm sorry Harm" he said. "I never asked how you were doing."
"I'm alright" he replied. "I'll be better when I can get out of bed without asking for someone to shoot me, and even better when I can get back to work, but I'm...okay, I guess."
"That's good" Sturgis replied. "Harm, seriously, I know things are rough but I need Mac to come in to work today. My client really wants to put this whole thing behind him."
"Not happening, Sturg" said Harm. "As we speak she's passed out cold right here next to me, and if I didn't wake her up to feed the baby, I'm damn sure not gonna wake her up to tell her to go to the office."
"Harm...look the man wants to get back with his family, but every time I even mention dealing Mac gets...you know how she gets sometimes" Sturgis told Harm, after all their fights were legendary.
"Yes, I know better than anyone" said Harm, "but regardless, she's not going to be there today and she's not going to work on anything other than getting her strength back, so you and your client will just have to hold your horses until tomorrow!"
"Getting her strength? Believe me when she was tearing up the man yesterday she had plenty of strength" Sturgis scoffed. "We need her here; she has to do her job..."
"Her job for today" said Harm in a tone that left no room for debate, "is to take care of herself so that she can take care of Ainsley and I and do what she needs to do in the office! You're not gonna win this one, Sturgis; she's not coming in today, end of debate!"
"What am I supposed to tell my client?" Sturgis asked. "He already..." Sturgis caught himself in time. If Harm knew that...
"Spill it, counselor" said Harm, "already what?"
"I can't..." Sturgis replied. "Let say he really doesn't care for her or her attitude towards him and...He's really unsettled by the fact she just assumed he did what he's accused of doing."
"That's for the two of you to work out when she gets back" said Harm, bothered a little by what this client thought of his wife, but he knew it was the nature of the beast. "She should be in tomorrow, but I can guarantee you won't be seeing her today."
"She needs to be in today" Sturgis pressed. "There really is no room for debating this."
"You're right" said Harm, just as Ainsley spit the bottle out and began to cry. "She's not going in, end of debate. Anything else?"
"Yeah...put her on" Sturgis told him. "I want to talk to her."
"I told you, she's sleeping" said Harm as he tried to hold the phone between his ear and shoulder and pick up the baby from his lap. "Plus you're not exactly tops on her list of favorite people right now. You've really been stressing her a lot over this case, and it needs to stop. She's got all she can handle right now between me and the baby; she doesn't need you or anyone else adding to her mental exhaustion."
"She's adding to her own" Sturgis replied firmly. "She's completely lost control, she's irrational wh..."
"Enough!" exclaimed Harm, causing Ainsley to wail in his arms. "Great, now look what you made me do. Mac is no doubt doing what she feels is right with regards to the case, and if you have a problem with that then I suggest you talk to the General because I don't want you harassing my wife over this matter any further! Is that understood, Commander?"
Sturgis relented, "I'm not harassing her, but alright..."
"I've gotta take care of the baby" said Harm, thankful for the obvious reason to get off the phone. "Was there anything else?"
"Yes, tell her to be here tomorrow and I do hope things get better for you" Sturgis said. "We are, after all, still friends."
Harm nodded. "Yeah, we are" he agreed, knowing that the issue at hand was nothing personal; it was strictly business. "She should be there in the morning; that's my plan anyway. I'll let her know you called."
"Thank you" Sturgis replied. "And good luck." With that he ended the call.
Mac stirred again beside Harm in the bed and made a tiny "mmm" as she struggled with fatigue.
"Hey, babe" said Harm softly as he tried in vain to quiet Ainsley. "Sorry that woke you up; I tried to be quiet."
"She's hungry" Mac said as she tried to sit up. "Why do I feel so funny?"
"What do you mean by 'funny'?" he asked. "And she can't be hungry, she just had a bottle."
"I'm...I just feel funny" Mac said again. "Like my whole body is heavy. And that's her hungry cry."
Harm listened carefully for a moment. "You're right" he said, "it is, but she downed a full bottle not 30 minutes ago. Wanna see if she'll eat any more?"
"I have to sit up first" Mac said yawning and stretching. "Seriously, did I take one of your pills by accident or something?"
He laughed a little. "No, you didn't. You're completely wiped out, sweetie" he said. "You've been in a deeper sleep than you've been in since before the baby was born, and it's hard to wake up from that." Ainsley began to cry harder in her daddy's arms.
"Can you calm her just a second until I go pee?" Mac asked swinging her legs over the side of the bed. "Then you can go if you need to."
"Go ahead" he said as he patted Ainsley's back, holding her close to his shoulder. "I'm fine for now; haven't drank very much today."
"You have to eat" Mac called from the bathroom. "You haven't since yesterday."
"After you feed her" he called back. "I can wait, but her patience seems to be wearing thin." Ainsley had worked herself into an all-out wail.
"How did you get her...Harm tell me you didn't get up again!" Mac's mind was still clouded by exhaustion as she asked this question.
"Mattie brought her to me" he answered. "Brought me the baby and the bottle before she left for school. I was a good boy, I promise."
Mac flushed the toilet and washed her hands. When she came out she asked him "how's the pain today?"
"Better" he said, his voice confident and upbeat. "Maybe I'm beginning to heal up, finally."
"I hope so, but after yesterday I don't want you to put any weight on your legs" Mac told him. "Not until you see Dr. Peddie again."
He nodded, agreeing completely. "I think I can maybe manage the wheelchair today, though" he said as Ainsley continued to holler. "Mommy's almost ready for you, beautiful girl, its okay..."
"I'm not sure I like that idea" Mac said as she came to take the baby from Harm. "I've got you sweetie" she cooed to her. "Mommy's going to fix you right up."
"I'll try it" he said. "If it hurts, I won't do it, period."
"Still, I'm not sure if I like that" Mac said again, the idea of seeing that too much for her to think about.
"Babe, all I'll do is slide into it, roll to the bathroom and roll back" he said. "No big thing."
Mac rose from the edge of the bed where she was sitting feeding Ainsley. "But that's where you're wrong, Harm. It's a huge deal." She started for the door.
"Mac, wait!" he said, unsure what to make of her uneasiness. "Please, come here."
Mac turned, and bouncing Ainsley a bit to keep her content, moved to stand next to him.
"Sit down" he said gently, pointing to her side of the bed. "Sit next to me so we can talk."
Mac walked around and sat down as he asked, but she didn't look up from the baby's head. "Okay."
He rubbed her back softly as he began to speak. "It's the nightmare, isn't it? That's why you don't want me to use that thing." He nodded towards the folded wheelchair across the room.
"Its more than that" she sighed. "But yeah...Harm we both had nightmares about that. That's just a bit bizarre."
"Perhaps" he said, "or perhaps it's simply because we're both living with this situation right now. Life has a way of leading our dreams sometimes, but I don't want you to be afraid that anything either of us dreamt about will come to pass. It won't; I know that in my heart."
"But… I don't" Mac said lifting her eyes to meet his for the first time. "Maybe not me leaving or you leaving...but the other part is very...there are so many risks."
"I know there are" he replied. "I can't disagree that there's a chance something could eventually land me in a wheelchair, but I also can't dwell on it. We just got married, we have this beautiful baby, we have Mattie...our life is too good to think about anything bad like that." He reached out and rubbed Ainsley's little head.
"But you have to have surgery, Harm" Mac said. "And soon. How can I not be worried that…?"
He shook his head. "No, don't talk like that" he said softly. "Don't talk like that or think like that. We know there are risks, but we'll get through everything no matter what happens; we always do."
Mac smiled a bit and looked down at their daughter, who was greedily nursing. "Yeah we do, don't we?"
"I can't believe she's so hungry" he said. "Is she supposed to start eating that much more already? She's not even 5 months old yet."
"She's probably growing" Mac said as she cuddled their daughter. "She's getting so big so fast."
"I know it" he said with a proud smile. "At this rate she'll be starting college before we can turn around three times."
"Don't say that" Mac told him a bit wistfully. "I want...I wish she could just stay like this. You know?"
"Spoken like a true mother" he said with a smile. "I doubt there's one of you on the planet who doesn't wish their babies could stay babies forever."
"Like you don't?" Mac laughed a bit and disconnected the baby to switch sides.
His smile remained as he shrugged in reply. "Yeah, I do."
"Harm?" Mac said tentatively once Ainsley was reconnected.
"Hmm?" he replied, his hand against the small of her back.
"Once this is...this thing with your back is resolved...I'm going to call Dr. Kendall and see what tests need to be done" Mac said as she rocked their daughter.
"Sure" he answered tenderly. "Do you think he'll want me to do my test again?"
"Probably, given your recent condition" Mac replied. "It could affect your ability to..."
"Let's hope not" he said with a nervous laugh. "Never been a problem and God willing it never will be!"
"Last night..." Mac said gently. "You weren't exactly yourself, Commander."
"I'm also not healed up completely just yet" he said confidently. "You just wait until I am; I doubt there'll be any concern as to my ability to..." He blushed the tiniest bit as he thought about the matter.
"All done, baby?" Mac asked Ainsley who had stopped sucking and started gumming. "I can't wait, sailor" she winked at him. "Oh, rats!"
"What?" he asked in a panic.
"I am soo late for work" Mac gasped. "It's after 0930 and I have a meeting with Sturgis" Mac ranted. "Now I'll have to put up with..."
"Hold up, hold up" said Harm, waving his hands as he spoke. "You've got the entire day off today. I want you to spend it resting and doing only the things you absolutely have to do around here, and then you can go to work tomorrow and not feel like you stepped off the set of Night of the Living Dead."
"But I have to...Harm, if I'm not there we're only going to backslide and...Oh this is a nightmare" Mac groaned.
"No it's not, babe" he said. "Sturgis called and he and I had a little chat. Things are fine, I promise. Nothing at JAG that can't wait until tomorrow."
"Harm, tell me you didn't...you didn't say I've been complaining about him, did you?" Mac asked as she patted Ainsley back.
"I let him know you weren't happy with him" said Harm, "and that if he thought you were being too hard-nosed, you were just playing the game the same way we all do."
"It's no game, and you know it" said Mac firmly.
He knew she was uptight, and allowed the comment to slide without rebuttal. "Is she finished?" he asked, nodding towards the baby. "If she is, I'll take her for awhile so you can shower."
"She just needs to be burped and you need breakfast" answered Mac.
"Well, let me burp her" he said. "You can go make breakfast or you can shower; whichever you'd rather do first."
"I'm not too hungry, I'll get you something then I want to lie down again. I don't...I still feel funny" Mac said as she walked over and handed him the baby.
"You're not sick, are you?" he asked, settling Ainsley in his lap.
"I don't think so, my head hurts though" she sighed. "I'm probably over tired is all."
"Probably so" he agreed, a little concerned that she might have caught the bug that was going around the office.
"All I want to do is get you fed and lie down, that's all I want to do" she told him stifling another yawn. "What are you up for?"
"Cheese toast and coffee?" he asked as he rubbed circles on Ainsley's back.
"That's it?" she asked.
"Mm-hmm" he said. "Quick and easy, plus I like it."
"Coming right..." She stopped mid sentence and put her hand on the dresser.
"Mac! What's wrong?" he asked, once more in a panic. He laid the baby on the bed and began to try and get up.
"Harm, stay still" Mac ordered. "I'm fine, I'm just a bit tired, that's all. I'll get your breakfast."
"No, you won't" he said firmly. "You'll come back here and get back into bed before you fall over."
"Harm you've got to eat" Mac insisted. "And maybe I do, too." She took a deep breath as her world lurched again.
"Mac! Come on, get back in bed!" he said, wishing he could go help her, but knowing if he tried he might make things worse for her by hurting himself again.
"I think I'd better" she said, moving slowly to the bed. "But what about you? You need to eat."
"I'm fine until you rest for awhile more" he assured her. "I'm not about to send you to the kitchen and have you pass out. Try to go back to sleep; I'll take care of Ainsley until you wake up."
"I just feel so funny" Mac sighed as she sank to the bed. "Like dizzy but not and this headache..." She reached up to massage her aching temples.
"I'm gonna call Harriet" said Harm as he reached for the phone. "Maybe she can come help with the baby while you sleep off whatever this is."
"I'm not really tired" she said. "At least I don't feel like it, but I feel..."
"Like what?" he asked. "Like you should eat, maybe?"
"No, not that" Mac sighed. "Just..."
"I'm worried about you, babe" he said gently. "Do you think a nap will help you feel better?"
"I don't know," Mac sighed. "It's weird." Her voice was soft and getting weaker as she lie upon the pillows.
Harm placed the call to Harriet, and thankfully she was available to come help out. By the time he wrapped up the call, Mac was nearly asleep, her hand on Ainsley's back.
"Mac?" he whispered.
"Hmm?" she whispered weakly.
"Harriet is coming over within the hour" he said. "Go to sleep; you'll feel better."
"I need some Tylenol" Mac said, struggling against her body to rise.
"Be careful" he said, internally cursing his bad back for preventing him from being able to help his wife.
Mac rose with no trouble, but halfway to the bathroom everything lurched again. She tried to hide her startle from Harm and continued on.
By the time she returned to the bed, he could see the exhaustion in her eyes, despite her having slept all night. She was far more tired than either of them had realized, and it was clearly for the best that the General had agreed to Harm's request that she be off for a day.
Mac snuggled against Harm's side once she was in bed, inhaling his scent. "I'm going to try and nap...If Sturgis calls back...tell him something. I just…I can't deal with that now."
"I'll take care of everything" he replied softly. "Rest, my love. You're so tired..."
"Too much" she whispered closing her eyes.
"What's too much?" he whispered. "You're too tired?"
"No" she answered. "Too much, too fast" she replied.
He felt so guilty as her words registered in his mind and heart. Her life had changed immensely in the last few weeks, and she was forced to deal with his injury when she should have been focused on keeping track of the days until their wedding photo proofs were supposed to be delivered. It just wasn't fair, and he wished he could take on her suffering, just like she wished she could do for him.
Before he could verbally reply, Mac's eyes closed and she drifted off. Once Harriet arrived, Harm ate and went to the bathroom with the help of Bud's chair. He needed to nap himself once he got back in bed, and the couple slept on. At about 1500, Harriet gave the baby a bath as Harm and Mac continued to sleep in each others arms. It was this scene that Mattie saw when she went to the bedroom to greet her father once he had awakened.
"Hey Dad!" Mattie greeted.
"Shh" he said softly as he looked over at Mac. "She's exhausted. Let's take this to the other room."
"But you can't..." Mattie began.
"Yeah, I can. Pull that thing over here for me, please" he said, pointing to the wheelchair.
Mattie shrugged, but did as she was asked. "Is she okay?" she whispered, nodding at Mac.
"Yeah" he answered as he slowly maneuvered himself up off the bed. "Everything from the last few weeks is catching up with her. She's off today, and if she can sleep most of the day and then all of tonight, I think it'll do her a world of good. Is the brake set on there?"
"Yep" she said. "Isn't she going to be pissed you got up?"
"Only if she finds out" he answered with a smile as he took a deep breath and moved from the bed into the chair.
Mattie held her breath as she watched her father move, and cringed at his grimace of pain. "Now what?" she asked, once he was settled.
"Now we go to the living room" he said "so I can lie on the couch while we talk. Care to do the honors?"
"Should I grab a pillow or something?" Mattie asked as she began to push the wheelchair to the master bedroom's doorway.
"There are some throw pillows on the couch" he said.
"Okay" Mattie replied and pushed him to the sofa. "Seriously, dad, is Mac okay? She looks kind of pale." This as she parked the chair next to the sofa and set the brake.
"She probably caught a bug or something" he replied. "She didn't feel good this morning, but I think its all part of being so run down and tired. She thinks so, too."
"Cool" Mattie replied. "Need help moving or just let you go?"
"I think I can do it myself" he said. "But stay right here in case I'm wrong."
"Will do" Mattie replied and nervously shuffled her weight. She wasn't sure how her Dad would take what she had to say, but she had to say it and get it off her chest.
Harm was able to get himself out of the wheelchair and onto the couch without a terrible deal of pain. "Can you put that pillow behind my knees, Mats?"
"Yeah" she said, and did as he asked her. "Anywhere else? Mac puts one by your shoulders."
"Yeah, tuck the other one back there" he said. "That'll be fine. What did we need to talk about?"
Mattie tucked the other throw pillow behind his shoulders then sat down. "This is really hard to say" she began fidgeting nervously.
"Go ahead, sweetheart" he said. "You know you can talk to me about anything." He wasn't sure what was coming, but he knew if Mattie had asked to talk to him about it, it was big.
"It's just with everything going on, I don't want to hurt your feelings" Mattie said. "But I really have to get this off my chest, you know?"
He nodded. "Okay."
"There's a lot of stuff on my mind, and I'm not sure what to do about it" she said and fidgeted again.
"Mattie" he said, his concern growing by the minute. "Are you in some kind of trouble at school? Are you...are you unhappy living here with us? What's the problem?"
"No, no" Mattie said hastily. "Its not you guys. I love you and Mac and the baby, but it is school, or rather someone at school."
"Is someone bothering you at school?" asked Harm. "I can have a talk with your principal and-"
"Dad, chill out" Mattie laughed. "He's not bothering me, not really. I mean, I thought he was a pest at first but now he kinda grew on me."
Harm could feel the wheels turning within his head as he deciphered what his daughter was telling him. "You've...got a crush on a guy?"
"Not really, dad" Mattie replied. "You're probably going to get a call from Principal Martin, because he kind of caught us kissing in the locker room."
"WHAT?" exclaimed Harm, forgetting for a moment that his wife was down the hall sleeping. "Who is this boy? How do you know him? How old is he?" The questions came like a barrage of gunfire as he took in what she had told him.
"Dad, chill" Mattie rolled her eyes. "Mac's sleeping."
"I'm well aware of that, young lady" said Harm sternly. "You're the one who wanted to talk about this, so talk."
"Well, don't yell at me" Mattie replied. "I knew this wouldn't work out."
Harm took a deep breath. "It'll work out just fine" he said, several notches calmer than he had been. "I need to know some things about this guy, Mats. You felt you could talk to me about this, and I'd like to hear what you have to say."
"Well his name is Dave and he's in my astronomy class" Mattie said. "He's really cute and he has this really hot car..."
"Whoa, hold on" said Harm, the protective father in him coming out. "Have you ridden in his car?"
"Only once" Mattie replied. "It's really cool."
Harm eyes grew wide with anger. "I thought we made it clear that you were never to ride in a car with anyone Mac or I don't know" he said, his voice once again quite stern. "Did you not remember that little rule?"
"I did, but Dad I had to..." Mattie began.
He shook his head, trying to calm himself down. He knew yelling at her was no way to get her to talk to him, and that wouldn't do anyone any good. "When did you ride with him, and why did you 'have to'?" he asked.
"Today" Mattie replied. "And I had to because my friend Cathy said if I did he was going to ask me out for Saturday night, and I guess I thought if I didn't let him drive me home, he wouldn't ask me."
"Mattie" said Harm, "I don't want you to ever feel that you have to do something you know is wrong just to get something you want, especially when it comes to guys. I know you only wanted him to ask you out - which by the way is another topic altogether, and one we will cover in short order, missy - but it's a dangerous game to play regardless, and I want you to understand that."
"Dad, it's not a big deal," Mattie insisted. "He's a really nice guy. He's had his license for a year..."
"So he's what, 17, 18?" asked Harm. "You are 15, and that's too young to be going out with a guy that age."
"He's just barely 18 and I don't think I'm too young" Mattie replied. "I'm mature for my age, you said it yourself."
He nodded. "You are mature; sweetie, but still, you're only 15. Does this guy know how young you are?"
"Yeah, he knows" Mattie replied. "His sister is one of my friends."
"Which one?" asked Harm, shifting his legs a tiny bit against the pillows.
"Heather" Mattie replied. "I'm not sure you know her, but Mac does."
He thought for a moment. "I've heard the name, but I don't think I've met her. So this guy is interested in the friends of his little sister? I'm not too sure about that, Mattie..."
"It's not just that," Mattie said. "We have a class together and we work in the school planetarium together."
Again, the mental wheels turned. "How long have you known him?" asked Harm.
"Since school started" Mattie replied.
He nodded. "My gut reaction is, of course, to tell you no, you can't see him, however...since you are so mature for your age and you came to me and admitted you broke one of our rules, I'm willing to talk to Mac about it and maybe, maybe we'll agree to let you go out with him after we meet him - maybe."
"Dad, he wants to go out on Friday. Please, once before you meet him?" Mattie began.
"Sorry, Mats" he answered. "You're still grounded for that little fit you threw the other day, and I'm not gonna let you go out with him before Mac and I talk about it and have a chance to meet him."
"Dad, I don't want him to meet you right now" Mattie insisted. "Please."
He didn't know what to say. "Mattie, I'm still your dad. Being laid up doesn't change that."
"I know but...I...I just don't want you to meet him now and Mac's acting all crazy..." Mattie played with a strand of her hair.
"Mac is trying to keep the family functioning with very little help" said Harm. "I know she's been edgy lately, but most of that is my fault and I don't want you to hold it against her."
"I'm not, I just want to make a good impression and it's kind of embarrassing. She's all jumpy, you're just lying around...We look like the Simpson's or something" Mattie scowled. "Please Dad."
He sighed. "Let me talk to Mac. You're not going out this Friday, that much I can already tell you, but I'll see how she feels about maybe letting you go out next week. Things here should be better by then."
"He might not want to go out next week, I already said yes for this week" Mattie protested. "Please. I'll be grounded the next two weekends for this one night. Please."
"I'll have to talk to Mac" he said again, "and that might not be until later tonight. I'm not making you any promises, understand?"
"Fine" Mattie said. "Can I go to my room now? I have homework to do." It was clear she was mad at him.
"Go ahead" he said, knowing the conversation was over. As he laid his head back against the end of the couch, he thought he heard something in the bedroom.
Mac stirred and found herself alone in the bed. She looked around and realized she was indeed alone, Harm was missing and so was the wheelchair. She slid out of bed and put her feet on the floor standing up in a rush. Again, though, as before the entire room moved. Mac reached out to steady herself and in her efforts knocked the lamp off the nightstand.
"Mac?" called Harm from the living room as he moved as fast as he was able to get back into the wheelchair. "Mac? Are you okay?"
Mac sank back on the bed to rid herself of the dizziness and vaguely heard Harm's voice. She didn't make out what he said though so she held her response.
He got himself into the chair and back down the hallway to the bedroom within three minutes, tops. When he arrived, he found her sitting on the bed, her head in her hands. "Baby, what's wrong?" he asked, "I heard a crash. Are you okay?"
"I'm okay" she said though she sounded very far away. "I knocked the lamp over."
He rolled around to where she sat and placed his hands on her knees. "Are you still dizzy?" he asked. "Lie back down. I'll have Mattie bring you some juice; you need something in your stomach."
"I'm still all...I don't remember feeling like this, ever" Mac sighed. Then it dawned on her that he was sitting up. "What are you doing out of bed?"
Rats. He'd been so worried about her, he'd forgotten about the verbal thrashing he was likely to get if she found out he'd been out of bed. "I had to talk with Mattie, and I didn't want to disturb you, babe. I'll get back in bed right now."
"Wait" she said and lifted her head. Her face was white and her skin clammy. She really felt pretty bad and she wanted her husband.
"What is it?" he asked, the lack of color in her face worrying him further.
"Hold me?" she asked. "Just for a second, you need to get back in bed."
"Okay, sure" he replied softly, wrapping his arms around her as best as he could from the wheelchair. "I'm sorry you feel so sick."
"It's not sick" Mac protested. "Its funny, it's not anything I've felt before."
"You've never been this over-tired before, either" he said as he rubbed her back. "Step back and look at everything that's happened in the past few weeks: the week leading up to the wedding, the wedding, the honeymoon and all its 'adventures', Ainsley's sickness, my bad back and now things at the office are stressing you out. Baby, that's enough to make anyone feel worse than they've ever felt before."
Mac started to cry at that, hard sobs from deep inside of her. "I can't...I can't believe anyone could do that, Harm" she cried into his shoulder.
He didn't know what to make of her outburst. "Sshhh...it's okay. Tell me what happened? It's the case, isn't it? The one with Sturgis?"
She nodded. "I can't really tell you" Mac sobbed. "But...we are so lucky to have a child...I just want to be sick."
"Calm down, baby" he said. "Calm down; we don't have to talk about it. You need to lie back down, and I need to do the same, so let me go holler to Mattie to bring us a little snack, and then we'll get some more rest, okay?"
"I don't want to sleep anymore" Mac said as she wiped her eyes with her hand. "I want to make you something to eat and take care of you like I should be doing" Mac sighed. "Where's Ainsley?"
"Harriet took her to the grocery store" replied Harm. "They should be back within the hour, I'd imagine. I want you to lie back down, you don't have to sleep if you don't want to, but you need to rest. Please?"
"But I'm supposed to be taking care of you" Mac said again feeling another spell hit her and leaning against him as it did.
"Dizzy again?" he asked.
"I'm fine" she replied. "Let get you into bed, sailor."
"I can manage myself, I think" he said, wondering in his own mind why Mac wasn't chewing him out for being up in the first place. "Lie back down; I'll be beside you in just a moment."
"Feeling better are you?" she asked as she ease herself back down wanting nothing more than to lay her pounding head in her husband's lap.
"Some, yeah" he answered. "I'm still not supposed to be up for too long; don't want to set myself back, you know?"
"Did it hurt though, sitting up like that?" Mac asked her fingers going to her throbbing head.
"A little" he said, "but not like I did even yesterday. I really think I'm past the worst of it, so long as I don't do anything stupid."
"Still considering the surgery?" Mac asked moving to sit up. She needed something for her churning stomach.
"Mm-hmm" he answered. "No reason not to do it. I'm a time bomb as long as things remain like they are, and I don't want this to happen again if we can at all avoid it."
"I think I can agree with that" she said managing to rise this time without her world spinning.
He rolled over to his side of the bed, set the brakes on the wheelchair and carefully moved himself from the chair into the bed. "I'm getting better at this" he said as Mac headed to the door.
"Want a soda?" Mac asked him determined to get him what he needed herself.
"Sure" he answered. "That and one of those little cheese and cracker things; that'd be fine."
"Coming up" she said and made her way to the kitchen moving slowly as not to invite dizziness. She made it to the kitchen retrieved their snacks and returned without incident. "Is Mattie mad at you or me?"
"What gives you that idea?" he asked, accepting the soda and crackers from her.
"Music" Mac replied. "It's loud, she only does that when she's pissed."
He laughed a little. "Yeah, she's mad at me. She wants to go out with a guy from school this weekend, and I told her she was still grounded from earlier this week, plus you and I need to meet this guy before she goes out with him."
"You bet we do" Mac agreed. "And you can't let her out of her punishment, Harm." Mac walked around to her side of the bed and sipped her soda. "Damn, this headache won't quit."
"I'm sorry, baby" he said, putting his soda can on his bedside table. "Would it help if I massaged it?"
"Maybe" Mac sighed. "Couldn't hurt. How do you want to do this?"
"Lay your head in my lap" he said softly. "That way I don't have to move much and neither do you."
"You know, before I was thinking there's nothing more I want right now than to lie down with my head in your lap" Mac smiled as she changed her position and settled against him. "So did Mattie tell all about this boy?"
"Some" he replied as he began massaging her temples. "Not all, though. His name is Dave, he's barely 18, she met him at school and he's the older brother of her friend Heather. Do you know her?"
"Yeah" Mac replied. "I met her once. She's kind of flighty though."
"Welcome to the wonderful world of parenting a teenage girl" chuckled Harm. "I think we'll find many of her friends to be, shall we say, less than what we consider ideal. As long as she keeps a level head and we always show a real interest in her life, she'll be fine."
"Yeah, I hope so" Mac sighed. "I only hope and pray they'll choose better life partners than I did, Mattie and Ainsley both."
"Obviously, present company excepted" he said with a little grin.
"Well, you see my husband" Mac sighed. "He sort of has a listening problem."
"Oh my" said Harm. "Does he know about this 'problem'?"
"I think so" Mac replied. "He just keeps doing it anyway. Can you press a bit harder on the left one?"
"Yeah" he answered. "What doesn't he listen to?" He had a pretty good idea, but he wanted to make sure.
"Well you see he has a bad back" Mac said coyly. "But instead of staying bed where he belongs he gets up and rides around the house in wheelchairs. He's lucky I don't feel up to kicking his six.
He shook his head. He knew she wouldn't let him off the hook without some sort of berating. "Well, I'm willing to bet that this husband of yours" he said, "loves you like crazy, even if he's a bit stubborn at times." He continued to rub her temples.
"I love him, too" Mac sighed. "But today I've not been the best wife to him."
"I'm sure he doesn't agree with that" said Harm.
"All I want to do today is lie down" Mac sighed. "I can't believe...this is so un-Marine of me."
He stopped his massage and placed his hands on her shoulders. "Mac, you don't have to be a Marine all the time. Sometimes, lots of times, its okay to just be you - to be my wife, the mother of my baby, the woman I love more than any other in the entire world."
"If you don't stop being sweet" Mac threatened before she started to sit up.
He smiled. "What'll you do, hmm?"
She sat up all the way and leaned over towards him, lips within inches of his. "This" she replied before placing the softest of kissed on his slightly parted lips. "I love you so much" Mac whispered.
He reached out and wrapped his arms around her back, drawing her nearer to himself. "The feeling is" he said, pausing to return her kiss, "very, very mutual."
A/N: Hope you enjoyed the latest in the seemingly never-ending saga of life at the Rabb's! Harm is doing noticeably better, wouldn't you say?