Mob didn't like ignoring people.

She didn't like pretending that someone who was in the room was not. She didn't like not responding to people when they talked to her…especially not her friends. So she didn't much like treating her friend this way. She didn't know why he was being treated this way anyway. She loved Shimazaki and he loved her, not in the way that he loved Minegishi of course, but they did love each other. She remembered him saying that before they ate the sugar cubes together. He loved her and he would do really gross stuff, the grossest stuff that had ever been imagined, before he let her get hurt….so really she should not have been ignoring him….

But Minegishi said that she had to.

"Ignore him." said Minegishi as they ran their hand up and down her back. Mob nodded, her head resting on their lap. They were watching TV now, well Mob was sort of watching TV. It was hard to watch TV when Shimazaki was teleporting in and out of the room leaving things in front of Minegishi's feed. Mostly plants.

Minegishi liked plants.

A lot of their plants had gotten hurt after Mob had ate the sugar cube…and that had all been her fault. She had been the one who had suggested that they eat sugar cubes and she was the one who had lost control of her powers and trashed the house. None of that had been Shimazaki's fault. None of it. He had just been trying to show her a good time. That was all. She had just been hanging out with him and then they'd had…a time…and then she had lost control of her powers and now…now they all lived in another house and Minegishi's plants had been saved and everyone else's stuff had been fixed or replaced….and Mob just wished that things could have been better….that everyone could just go back to the way that they had been before….but they couldn't go back…

Because Minegishi was still mad at Shimazaki.

"Toshi, come on. Look, these ones are alive this time. Come on, talk to me." Said Shimazaki. He left a potted plant at Minegishi's feet. This one was really pretty purple flowers. She wondered if that was on purpose or if it had just been a lucky coincidence. It must have been a lucky coincidence because he didn't know what color was. She didn't know. She couldn't ask him.

She was supposed to be ignoring him.

She didn't want to make Minegishi upset…but she didn't want to make Shimazaki upset either. He had said that he loved Minegishi and…and Minegishi didn't have to love him back but ignoring him seemed sort of mean…and also Minegishi had said that this was all because of the sugar cubes. They had said, when Mob had come down from the sugar cubes, that she had been too young for that and that Shimazaki knew better than to give her sugar cubes….and Mob didn't think that she had been too young…well she had lost control of her powers….but she wasn't a little kid anymore.

She was almost eleven.

She had lost control of her powers and that was on her. She should have worked harder at not clawing the plaster off the ceiling or throwing things around the house…and she had only done that because her powers had been looking for…she had been looking for Sho and not Sho. Maybe the house had been why, being in a different place, and that was why she hadn't recognized anything….or something. She didn't know. Nothing made sense and everything made sense….and a lot of stuff still didn't make sense…

This feeling of loss didn't make sense.

She'd been carrying this feeling with her for days. She felt like she had lost something, someone, and she didn't know what it was. She had thought that calling Sho would have made her feel better but it hadn't. Sho had been busy and….and she should not have smothered him like dad smothered her. Sho was off helping Fukuda do really important work and Mob should not have been distracting him. Sho needed to learn how to run Claw since he was the one who would inherit not only Claw but the whole world….and she needed to stop smothering him….

And to stop wanting to smother him, too.

She felt almost like she was ignoring him….was that what this feeling of loss was? That she had lost her brother? That she wasn't calling or testing or facetiming or emailing or….or anything like that? But she wasn't supposed to smother him….and he didn't have time for her anyway…and stuff. She didn't know. All she knew was that she wanted her brother…that she missed him more than anything…..that she wanted him back…

And that she wanted her friends to get along.

"Ignore him." said Minegishi. They didn't even look at the flowers that Shimazaki had brought them. They didn't care, it seemed like, but that made no sense. Shimazaki was the person, the boy person, that they cared about most in the whole world. That was why they kissed him and cuddled with him and helped him buy clothes and told him what was in cans and told him if his hair looked nice and read to him whenever he asked them too….but they hadn't done any of those things since the sugar cube times….

And Mob wished that she had never seen those stupid sugar cubes, that she had never gotten hungry and then gotten the idea to eat them, because if she hadn't anted to eat them then none of them would have been in this mess.

"Minegishi, look. There are flowers and they're purple and-" said Mob. Shimazaki was still standing there and his aura was pulled in as close as his barrier was….and his barrier was extra thick now. She could see it. He was trying to keep himself safe….and he didn't need to. Mob was there and she would keep him safe, he knew that, though she had no idea what she was supposed to be keeping him safe from. The bad feelings, maybe, or something. She didn't know. She just knew that she wanted things to go back to the way they were.

If that was even possible.

Because Minegishi had never acted like this before. Mean. Mean in the real way, not the Minegishi way, and Mob had no clue how to fix this. How she was supposed to make things better between her friends. They were fighting….fighting and not fighting, and she would have done anything, even the really gross thing Shimazaki had said about, to make things better. There had to have been something that she could do…but she had no idea what. She had never been good at these sorts of things, these talking things, and it seemed like it would end up being one of those talking things since the gifts were not working at all…and Minegishi didn't have to accept them but they could at least say 'no thanks' instead of letting them pile up at their feet.

It was like Christmas but sad.

"Mob, want to watch another one? Or do you want to pick this time. Anything but Frozen." Said Minegishi. Mob would have picked Frozen if she could have picked Frozen. She would have picked Frozen because Frozen made sense. Elsa was afraid of herself but then she got older and learned to control her powers and now she wasn't. Also she had a sister who she loved. She understood Frozen.

She didn't understand this at all.

Shimazaki had told Minegishi that he loved them. They should have been happy. But they weren't. They were so very unhappy that they were ignoring Shimazaki…and he didn't like to be ignored. He had done a lot of screaming, mostly telling her to look at him, and she knew that he hated being ignored. Plus he had that thing, Minegishi said, where if people weren't paying attention to him he forgot that he was real. So there was that. It seemed so mean to ignore him after he had declared his love for them….and also knowing that he didn't like it.

And Mob hated being mean.

This felt wrong, meanness, it felt so wrong. It felt like wearing pants. It felt like she was wearing pants and walking around in pants and she had no choice because in her drawers were more pants. Jeans and dress pants and shorts and leggings and those leather pants Shimazaki wore a lot of the time. This whole thing felt like pants on top of pants on top of pants. It felt like they were all wearing pants….well Minegishi always wore pants….so it felt like she was wearing pants and Minegishi was wearing a dress and Shimazaki wasn't wearing black and…and everything just felt so wrong….

And she had no clue how she was supposed to make this right.

"You can pick….and also Shimazaki left flowers for you. See? They're alive this time." Said Mob as she used her powers to lift up the potted plant Shimazaki had left down on the rug at their feet. There was dirt on the rug now, and it would show since this rug was white, and then Shibata would be upset because he was the only one who did any cleaning around here….but Minegishi should have been happy. Purple was their favorite color and they loved plants.

But why weren't they happy?

They had been super upset about their plants getting ruined. They had shouted at Shimazaki about that…and all he had done was hug them and tell them that he loved them…and also he kept on asking to do more than kissing stuff with them…which had been very gross and stuff….but at the time Mob had just been happy to have seen Minegishi. The loss feeling had gone away when they had been there….but they had not been the person who she had lost. No, she had lost Sho…Sho and not Sho….and she had already lost one person. She did not want to lose two….or three….or anyone at all!

She just wanted things to be ok. Was that so much to ask?

"I see what Shimazaki left on the floor. Now ignore him." said Minegishi. They sounded mad but they were petting her hair now like she was a cat or something. Mob didn't know why. She wasn't that tired. She had been having trouble sleeping but she wasn't going to just fall asleep from being petted like a cat. How could she fall asleep with everything that was going on?

They had called him Shimazaki.

They had called him Ryou for a while now but now he was back to being Shimazaki…and it was all her fault. This hurt him, even if she hadn't been there when he confessed his love for them Mob knew that it would have hurt him, and he teleported away. Mob sat up. Maybe he would come back. Maybe he would come back and then Shimazaki would say sorry again and then Minegishi would call him Ryou and then things would be good between them again and then everything would be ok. That was what Mob wanted. It was so easy for things not to be ok…and that was not ok. She needed her friends to be ok…and she was so sorry for all the things that she had done….

She was just so sorry.

She wondered if kowtowing would make it better. She wouldn't mind it. She would spend the rest of her life kowtowing if that made everything all better. She just….there was enough loss. Any more loss would have been too much loss…and she already felt maybe too much loss. The loss of Sho….this feeling of having lost Sho and not Sho….it felt sort of….sticky. Like no matter where she went or what she did the feeling of loss would stick to her like gum on the bottom of her shoe….and stuff. Maybe the fact that it felt like Shimazaki and Minegishi were losing each other….

And Mob was getting very sick of loss.

Losing mom….losing Sho…..so much loss…and she didn't want to lose anyone else. She didn't want to feel any more loss. She didn't want to feel any more loss. She just….she wanted everyone to be together and to be happy and if….if she had to kowtow for the rest of her life in order to make things better then….then she would do anything. She just wanted everything to be better and she didn't care what happened to herself just so long as everyone was happy.

That was what mattered. Her friends being happy.

"Minegishi-" sais Mob. She needed to say sorry. She needed Minegishi to know that she was so very sorry for what happened and that it was ok for them to be friends with z again. They didn't have to love him back but she still wanted them to be friends. She had ruined everything and it was all her fault and no wonder Sho didn't want to talk to her.

"Mob. Drop it." Said Minegishi

"But…..but I just want…" said Mob

"I said to ignore him." said Minegishi. They had a tone, there, and Mob didn't know what it meant but she knew that it was not a good tone at all. They were upset…and Mob had made them upset.

"I'm sorry about-" said Mob. She just needed to say sorry. When you messed up then you had to say sorry. So that was what she was doing. Saying sorry.

"Mob, leave it. I said to ignore him so ignore him." said Minegishi. Mob didn't get it. Shimazaki had gone off to wherever it was that he had gone off to. Probably to get more plants for Minegishi. Mob didn't want to ignore anyone but it was easy not to pay attention to someone when they weren't in the room.

But she wanted to pay attention to Shimazaki.

Her memories from that time weren't the best but she knew that he had asked her to look at him. She looked at him. She had looked at him and he had still asked her to look at him even though she had been looking at him…and he really did not like to be ignored. It made him upset…and she didn't want him to be upset. Ever. For any reason.

"But….but how can I ignore someone who's not in the room…and I don't want to ignore him anyway. I want…I want you guys to be friends again." said Mob. She just wanted all of her friends to get along…because if they stopped getting along….then they would stop being friends….and she didn't know what she would do if they stopped being friends. They had to be friends with each other and they had to be friends with her, too….well not HAD to be. Nobody had to be friends with her if they didn't want to be friends with her…

But she really wanted them to be friends with each other.

Well what she really wanted was for Shimazaki and Minegishi to be in love and to be boyfriend and they-friend and then married and then they could have babies and then she could play with the babies and the babies would love her and she would love them…and then maybe they could be friends with her babies when she had them….if she ever had them…and then they could be friends with Sho's babies when he and his girlfriend Emmy from England got married and then everyone would be together and happy and the feeling of loss would be gone forever.

Which would have been the best thing ever.

"Mob….we are friends. Ok? He and I….we're friends. I'm just angrier at him now than I have ever been in my entire life." Said Minegishi

"But….but he said that he was sorry." said Mob

"That doesn't change the fact that I'm mad at him." said Minegishi. Mob didn't know why they were still so mad…and she just…she just wanted to make things better…and she had no idea how to make things better…but she had to!

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry that I made you mad at him and I'm sorry that you guys are fighting and I'm just….sorry." said Mob. Minegishi shook their head 'no' and Mob had no clue what they were shaking their head about. Did they not believe her? She was sorry! She was so sorry!

She just wasn't showing it the right way.

She slid off the couch and was about to kowtow, her forehead had almost touched the ground, when she felt Minegishi's aura moving. She could feel it all around her, in the plants hanging from the ceiling and on the walls and piled up in front of her….she could feel Minegishi aura around her and one her, too, in the vines that wrapped around her and sat her back up on the couch.

Mob didn't get it.

When you were sorry you had to show it. So that was what she was had been doing….but maybe…maybe Minegishi didn't want to have it shown. Shimazaki had been showing how sorry he was and Minegishi had just been ignoring him…..and stuff…and Mob had messed up again and…and stuff. She was always messing up…she knew that she was always messing up…she had…she had felt it and…and she knew that before…a long time before…maybe in a different world, even, or a dream or…or this world when she had been little…..she had messed up….

She had messed up before…she didn't know how but she had…and now she was messing up again….

"Stop that. I've told you before that you have nothing to be sorry about. That shit show is on Shimazaki, not you, and you have nothing to apologize for….well for going along with his stupid idea…but you're a kid. He's an adult and he should have known that giving you acid was a TERRIBLE idea." Said Minegishi. Mob didn't think that it had been such a terrible idea. She had lost control of her powers, before, and…and it was never a good thing…but she didn't think that it was worth ignoring Shimazaki for and making him sad.

"But….I said that I was sorry for ruining the house…I didn't mean to and-" said Mob. This was all her fault and if Minegishi had to be mad at someone then it should have been at her. Shimazaki had just been thinking up things for them to do, that was all, and they didn't need to be so upset at him. They should have been upset at her, even though the thought of them being upset at her makes her insides hurt, because she didn't care what happened to her so long as her friends were happy.

What could be better than her friends being happy?

"That's the point. You didn't mean to. Mob….smoking is one thing. Drinking is one thing. That….what you two did was a whole other thing entirely and you are way too young for that…and we're lucky that you only destroyed one house. With your powers being what they are….and you being as young as you are…and the life you've been living…that could have been so much worse than what it was…and you don't need to be risking yourself like that." Said Minegishi. They ran a hand through their hair. It was getting longer again. They made it messy when they ran their hands through it. Mob fixed their hair with her powers. They didn't seem to notice because they did it over and over again. They did and they sighed and Mob knew that she had to say something but…but what? She had already said sorry…and she had no idea what else she could say. Maybe….Minegishi was worried about her…but they had no reason to be worried about her….

Because she had never been in danger.

"But Shimazaki said that nobody ever died from eating sugar cubes. Only people who thought that they could fly and he and I can already fly so….well I don't know why it's so dangerous for people who think that they can fly but can't….but he and I can fly so we were safe." Said Mob. Shimazaki would keep her safe, she trusted him, and Minegishi should have trusted him too. He acted like a crazy person a lot of the time but he was still a good friend.

"Mob…first of all that's a myth. They say that people would take acid, think that they could fly, and then they would jump off of buildings or something…but that's a myth. Nobody actually did that. You'll feel like you're flying…you'll feel a lot of things…and the danger is in what you feel." Said Minegishi

"Because my powers could go out of control." Said Mob. That made sense…and they had gone out of control…but that was just it. Those were HER powers that she was responsible for. There was no need to make Shimazaki feel bad just because she had trouble controlling her powers.

"That and…and you could have seen things or felt things that…that you didn't want to feel. I have no idea what you saw or felt or went but it could have been bad. It's like….I'm guessing Ryou did a lot of screaming and singing?" asked Minegishi

"He was doing both at the same time." Said Mob. She could sort of remember….but not clearly. She had been too busy in her own place, being in wherever that place had been, to think about how he had been until he pulled her out of wherever it was that she had been.

"Yeah, I figured…he always does that. I have no idea why he thought that he wouldn't, why he always thinks that he won't, but he does. He does and I'm sorry if he scared you." Said Minegishi

"I wasn't scared. I felt bad for him. He said mean stuff about himself and also….also he got kind of mad or sad or something about the sun…." said Mob

"He'll get like that…and worse." Said Minegishi

"Why? Why does he get like that? How do it fix it?" asked Mob

"You don't fix it. Unless you have a time machine you can't fix his terrible life….and it was terrible. Don't ever ask him about it. Ever. You do not need to know what he's been through. You have enough problems as it is." Said Minegishi

"But I don't have enough problems. I don't have too many problems to not want to fix-" said Mob. What was the point of having friends if you weren't going to help them out when they needed it? She would always be there for her friends no matter what. She was a very good friend like that. She had always considered herself to be a very good friend.

"No. His terrible life is not your problem. The fact that he won't acknowledge, actually acknowledge, how shitty his life was….and then he does shit like that…and he KNOWS that he shouldn't do shit like that…and he knows that I need to be there for him when he doesn't shit like that. You are ten years old. You are not equipped to handle him when he gets like that." said Minegishi. Mob just did not understand. What was so bad about what had happened? She had trashed the house, like Minegishi had said before, but they just moved. Really it was only a house, Claw had plenty of them, it wasn't like she had hurt a person or anything. She had never hurt a person before….with her powers….at least…

Red.

She had been little and there had been red….and that was all she remembered. Had she hurt someone? She didn't…she didn't even know if that had been real. She had been dreaming, it felt like, the sort of dreaming where you were in so deep that you thought that your dream was reality….so maybe it had all been a bad dream…or something. She didn't know. She didn't know what it was or what it meant…but she knew that even though she had lost control of her powers it wasn't so bad since she had only hurt the house, not a person, and houses were easily replaceable.

People were not.

"But…I don't understand why you're so mad at him. We ate the sugar cubes and it made us both weird…and I ruined the house….and I said sorry….and I just….I'm sorry. I'm sorry about the house and I'm sorry that you're mad now….but I didn't get hurt or hurt anyone…and I just think that maybe…you should accept Shimazaki's apology." said Mob

"I already told you that you have nothing at all to be sorry about. This is on him. Not you. This is all his doing. He's the one who did something stupid, he's the one who put you in danger. He thinks that giving me a bunch of plants is going to make up for the danger he put you in? If that's what he thinks then he has another thing coming. "said Minegishi

"But I wasn't in any danger. He said that he would suck-that he would do something really gross before he let anything bad happen to me. He said that I was safe and loved and stuff." Said Mob

"Mob…do you know why he said that?" asked Minegishi with a sigh. Mob shook her head. Well she sort of knew why he had said something so gross…but she had no idea what possessed him to even think up something like that. Boys were so weird.

"The gross thing? I guess to show me how much he wanted me to know that he would protect me. I don't know what he was protecting me from but he said that he would always keep me safe. I don't know why he thought up something so gross, though. Boys are so weird sometimes." Said Mob

"What exactly did he say to you?" asked Minegishi

"Um….I don't want to say….because it was gross…and I know why he said it but…but I don't know why he thought it up…or even how he thought it up….but it's ok. I know that he just wanted me to feel safe and loved and I did." Said Mob

"And do you know why, exactly, he told you that you were safe and loved." Said Minegishi

"He said that I had to be in a good mental place." Said Mob

"Exactly. You have to be in a good mental place because….because acid messes with your mind. You see things and hear things and smell things and taste things….you pretty much lose your mind for a little bit…and sometimes things can go wrong. That stuff….smoking is for fun. Drinking is for fun. Acid is….acid is for figuring yourself out. Processing things. Achieving enlightenment….if you're pretensions. You could have really messed your mind up. You could have ended up going to a bad place, a very bad place, and being as powerful as you are a bad trip…like the one he had….that could have messed you up." Said Minegishi

"But…but I'm fine. I didn't go to a bad place….I don't know where I went but it wasn't a bad place….well I mean I don't think that it was…..I don't really know where I went. The room was yellow." Said Mob. She held her hands in her lap. She looked down at them. They were bigger now, and her nails were blue. Her hands had been smaller then and her nails had been normal. She had been little then….maybe she had been little then because she felt little now….and maybe because she was little now. She was little compared to everyone around her…and she always would be. All of her friends were older than her…aside from Sho….but he was gone.

"Mob…where did you go, exactly? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to but…but I just want to know. Where did you go and why…why did you trash the house? That's what I'm so pissed about. You went to a place that you shouldn't have and…and you had no reason to be there. So just…where'd you go off to?" asked Minegishi

"Um….I didn't really GO anywhere. I mean I went to like this…dream place….in my head but I thought that the dream place was real…but really I was in bed with Shimazaki the whole time and he was holding on to me and I was holding on to him…but it was like…like I was outside of me and inside of me at the same time…and I went to a place where….where everything was different and everyone was different and I was looking for….I think for Sho…but Sho was called something else….but I needed to get Sho back….and I think that it was Sho, anyway, and I don't know what the whole thing was or meant…and also I was really little….and I don't know what the dream meant….but it wasn't bad. I don't know why I trashed the house and…and I don't think that me trashing a house is worth being mad at Shimazaki for….that was my fault and you should be mad at me and not him." said Mob

"Mob….I'm never mad at you, you know that. You're the child in this situation and he's the adult and he knew how…how badly that could have gone. I know the life you've lived and I know how much bad shit is there…and when you take acid it can bring up a lot of bad shit. You can get trapped in the worst moments of your life. You can relive every moment of pain you've ever had. You can sit there and have all of your failures stretched out in front of you for an eternity. Acid fucks with your perception of time and yourself and….and you can just…not come out the other side ok. I'm glad that you went to a place that…that wasn't like that." Said Minegishi

"It wasn't bad…but I don't know what it was. I don't know if it was a dream or a…a memory….or a memory of a dream…or a dream of a memory." Said Mob

"Mob…don't look too deep into it. Not at your age. Acid is not for someone your age and it…it's for introspection. It's for figuring yourself out….but you're only ten. You're still figuring yourself out and you don't need to mess your head up….so please don't do that again. I don't want you to…..to end up messing your brain up and…and I don't want you to do that again. Ok? Not even if Ryou asks you to." Said Minegishi. Mob didn't get what they were still so upset about….but also she didn't much want to do that again. She didn't much want to do that again. Smoking was fun, didn't make her head hurt, and didn't give her bad feelings that hung out for a while afterwards.

"Ok, I won't do it again….but can you…can you please stop ignoring Shimazaki. It hurts his feelings." Said Mob. She would never do it again. There. Now everything could be alright again. Now Minegishi would stop ignoring Shimazaki and they would stop being mad and then everything could go back to normal.

"Mob….I'm mad at him. If I look at him, speak to him, then I know that I'm going to say something…something that I might not be able to take back. I might tell him that he needs to think things through for once in his life. I might tell him that since most of his life has been one big shit show acid might not be for him. I might bring up the fact that he put you in danger when he was supposed to be watching out for you and how bad of a fuck up that was. I might….I might bring up a lot of things that I shouldn't. I need some space from him…and he needs to learn to give me some fucking space….and before you say anything I know that I'm being an asshole by ignoring him. it's better that I ignore him now, like an asshole, instead of saying things that he and I might not be able to come back from. Do you understand?" asked Minegishi

"Um….sort of. You're mad and you need space….does that mean that you won't ignore him for the rest of his life?" asked Mob. She hoped that they made up soon. Then things could be normal around here again….or something close to it…or maybe even better than normal because he had confessed to them…and they might have liked him back…and then it could be the most wonderful thing ever….

"No, not unless he ends up dead soon. I just need to calm down and…and I have some things that I need to process. Nothing about you just…some things that he said so me. I need to process them and it's a whole thing that you don't need to know about." Said Minegishi

"Oh. Do you mean how he said that he loved you? Because if you don't love him back you should say so right away. That was he can get his heartbreak out of the way and stuff. I don't think that heartbreak is a good feeling, I've never been dumped or rejected so I don't know….well it hurt when Hatori confessed to you…but he likes boys anyway and he doesn't even like you because you weren't born a boy…but I guess that being rejected would hurt….so if I were him I would try and get my hurt out of the way fast. Like ripping out a loose tooth." Said Mob

"Mob….don't rip your teeth out. Let them come out on their own. Sometimes things need to happen on their own….and sometimes things don't need to happen at all." said Minegishi

"But your teeth need to fall out so you can have new ones." Said Mob

"Not always. Sometimes things need to stay the way they are. Sometimes you're happy with your teeth the way they are and sometimes…sometimes you think that you might want adult teeth….but adult teeth are a lot of work that you won't know how to do…and you mess up and they get ruined and then you have nobody to blame but yourself." Said Minegishi

"But what about brushing and flossing?" asked Mob

"What?" asked Minegishi

"If you brush and you floss then your teeth with be healthy and clean. You just have to brush and floss the right way and if you don't know how then that's ok. There are lots of video on YouTube that you can watch." Said Mob. She wondered if they were talking about teeth still…or why they were talking about teeth in the first place. Minegishi had some very nice teeth, they were all normal colored and where they were supposed to be and stuff, but maybe they wanted them to be….better? Mob didn't know. She'd never gone to a dentist before.

"Mob….sometimes it's not enough to know about brushing and flossing. Sometimes you do it wrong or sometimes it's too much….and sometimes you just…you wake up and you realize that no matter how much brushing and flossing you did it wasn't enough and you messed up and it's on you and maybe you never should have tried in the first place." Said Minegishi running a hand through their hair again. Mob didn't get it. She really, truly, did not get it.

"Minegishi….are we still talking about teeth? Because it feels like we might be talking about something else and I just missed it." Said Mob

"Mob…just promise me that you'll never do acid with Shimazaki again. Promise me that if you want to do acid…you'll ask me…and only when you're older. Old enough to handle it. Ok?" asked Minegishi

"Um…ok. I won't eat sugar cubes again unless I'm older and with you….um….let's watch more TV now. I like this show but I keep forgetting which Sailor Girl is which." Said Mob. She didn't like it when they treated her like a kid…even though she was a kid…and stuff….and she just…she didn't know. She didn't know what else to say or what else to do so she watched TV.

She rested her head on Minegishi's lap and watched TV.

This was warm. This was soft. This was nice. She felt….warm and loved and safe. She knew that Minegishi was keeping her warm and loved and safe…and she was happy there. She was happy and…and she was relaxed. She still felt…nagging at the back of her head was the loss….but she wasn't….feeling it so much…because she had Minegishi there. Maybe it meant nothing. Maybe it had just been a memory of a dream or a dream of a memory…and maybe it had only happened because she missed Sho…and stuff…

She didn't know.

But she did know that she was safe and warm and happy….and she just felt so relaxed. She eventually felt her eyes closing. She felt her eyes closing and she felt her breath slowing down and she just…felt. She felt Minegishi's hand on her back and she felt their stomach pushing against them when they breathed in and out…and she felt…she felt good. So good. So good and safe and warm…

And she felt even better when Shimazaki was there.

Well she felt bad that he would be ignored again but…but she was happy that he was back. She remembered how…how nice it had felt…when she had been there in his arms and safe and warm. There had been so much trust there…she might have even trusted him more than anyone else in the whole world back when they had been eating sugar cubes. There had been something else there, too, something like a sort of…fluttery feeling? She didn't know. She didn't really feel that now. Now she mostly just felt like she could have just gone to sleep…

Well she could have if there hadn't been so much talking around her.

"Toshi…come on. At least look at me." Said Shimazaki. Mob kept still. He wasn't talking to her, he was talking to Minegishi, and she wanted to tell him that Minegishi was ignoring him…but maybe he didn't want to hear that. He knew already and…and is feelings must have been hurt enough as it was.

"You had better not be holding another plant, Ryou, and keep your voice down. I think that she might have finally fallen asleep." Said Minegishi. Mob kept herself as still as she could, even her aura, because….because they had called him by his given name…and that must have meant something good….right?

"No, chocolate this time. Or something rectangular and wrapped in paper. Here." Said Shimazaki. Mob felt something hit her on the back. She kept still. Minegishi took their hand off of her back and there was silence for a moment.

"I hate the kind with nuts in it, you now that." Said Minegishi

"And they don't make braille labels for candy. You know that." Said Shimazaki

"Then don't steal me any candy if you know that it's not going to work out." Said Minegishi

"It did end up working out, though." said Shimazaki

"How? You know I can't stand it when my chocolate has nuts in it." Said Minegishi

"You're talking to me again, aren't you?" asked Shimazaki

"I suppose I am…not that you deserve it. Not after the shit you pulled." Said Minegishi

"I said I was sorry. I know that I fucked up. I just….I wasn't thinking and-" said Shimazaki

"Big surprise there." said Minegishi

"I wasn't thinking and I messed up. I shouldn't have popped-" said Shimazaki

"Ryou, if you phrase it like that then I am getting up and leaving and not speaking to you for at least a month." Said Minegishi

"Sorry. I shouldn't have given her acid. I thought that….Toshi I couldn't stop thinking about you and then I wasn't thinking at all and then I messed up and…and I'm sorry. I know that I did something stupid. I know that she could have done more than destroy the house and yell about some guy she likes or something…and I know that I shouldn't have been tripping without you to ground me because, yeah, I went to a very bad place and…and shouldn't have gone there with her since she has enough shit going on. I fucked up and I'm sorry so…so please forgive me. Please, Toshi….or if not then at least look at me." Said Shimazaki. Mob felt Minegishi shifting under her…and then Shimazaki's aura got really bright. Bright like the time she had given him that whole box of dinner candles…but somehow brighter.

"Don't think that I'm forgiving you, Ryou, because I'm not. I'm looking at you now because I know what you've been through and I'm not heartless. I can be an asshole but I'm not going to send you down into that emotional shit. You're here, I'm looking at you, and I'm not going to ignore you anymore…but I need space. I need space to calm down and forgive you…and I need to process…all of this." said Minegishi

"Toshi-" said Shimazaki

"You may not remember what you said but I do. You really ran your mouth the other day. You did." Said Minegishi

"Toshi….I'm sorry. I said shit that only should have stayed in my head." Said Shimazaki

"Yeah, no shit. You asked to go down on me right in front of a TEN YEAR OLD. I thought that you and Hatori had switched bodies or something! Ryou, I would ask what possessed you to say something like that but I know-" said Minegishi

"That's not what I'm talking about, Toshi." Said Shimazaki. There was some silence and now both of their auras were pulled in as close as they could be. Mob didn't get it. What did they have to be so scared of? They were talking about their problems. You should always talk about your problems so that they can get better. Things never work out if you just let them grow and fester. Like when you left a bottle of milk under your bed for a long time. You needed to get rid of it even if it was gross. It would only get grosser and grosser and grosser until it exploded.

"I know what you're talking about." Said Minegishi

"It's true, you know…but that doesn't mean that it has to change the outcome. I know how you feel about all of that and….and I have no clue how I feel. Toshi…when I'm with you I'm happy. I feel all good inside. I feel like…like I can do anything. I feel like….I feel like I'm just…better when we're together. I like to be near you and I like to talk to you and touch you…and that's all I want. I want to hold you and talk to you and, yeah, occasionally go down on you….and don't freak out I'm mostly sure she's asleep….and just….yeah. I love you and we don't have to do anything with that. Neither of us does the couple thing and I know you don't want to have kids…and I have no clue how I feel about having kids…I mean I like them but….but I don't know how to take care of them. I mean I'm not going to lock them in their rooms all day with a HI-FI, a box of records, and a bucket to piss in but….there's a lot about them that I don't know and….yeah. I'm not going to ask that or anything of you." Said Shimazaki. Mob had never heard his voice like that. Low and….kind of…gravelly. Sort of like he might have been sick or something. She had never seen his aura like that either. All pulled in so close…and she had no idea what was happening because….because this was such a weird atmosphere…and she sort of wanted to get up and go to her own bed….but then they would know that she had been awake this whole time and listening to their conversation…..and then things would have been awkward and she did not want that at all.

"Then what's the point of even telling me?" asked Minegishi

"Because that was my acid epiphany. I love you. I love you and I have loved you for a while." Said Shimazaki. It took everything inside of Mob not to jump up and start hugging them. This was so great! Now he had confessed and they could confess and then they could be boyfriend and they-friend and…and it would be the best thing ever!

"I know you do….and I….I don't have a fucking clue. You're honest. You don't have a disingenuous bone in your body and…and I love that about you. I love how you own up to your mistakes, too, and there's just…there's never any bullshit with you….but I don't know if I love you….so I'm not going to say it back…and I don't know how I'll feel about you when I stop being pissed…..and you had better believe that I'm pissed. A few nice words and an 'I love you' is not going to change the fact that you fucked up in one of the worst ways possible. So, yeah, you're not off the hook just because you got all sappy on me." Said Minegishi. Mob could feel their aura and it felt…she didn't know if it was happy or sad or mad or scared or…or anything. It was like their aura was everything at once…and she didn't get it. He had confessed. What could be better than a boy confessing to you? Well a girl, if you were into that…but still. Shimazaki may have acted like he was crazy, like the time she gave Sho coffee but worse, but he was still a good person…but Minegishi might not have felt that way….

But it would have been really nice if they had.

"Yeah, I figured, but it was worth a try." Said Shimazaki

"Shut up." Said Minegishi. They sounded mean there, their words were mean, but their tone wasn't…and Mob didn't really know what to make of that or anything at all about this.

"That's what I love about you, Toshi, that and about a million other things…and you have no clue how good it feels to be able to say it." Said Shimazaki

"Yeah, well, I don't know if or when I'll ever be able to say it back." Said Minegishi

"I don't expect you to…but if you did then I'd be so fucking happy. Happier than the time we tripped and your tricked me into thinking I saved John Lennon." Said Shimazaki

"Thanks for warning me, Ryou, now how'd you like to go on tour with us? This brush with death has reminded me what's important and now we're getting the band back together and we'll be putting on nightly shows just for you." Said Minegishi in English and in an accent that made them hard to understand…but Shimazaki seemed to understand…because his aura was so happy then…and she could hear him laughing…and then he got really close…

And then she heard that smacky sound that they made when they kissed sometimes.

Which was good. That meant that they were back together as friends at least…even though she wanted them to be together as more than friends. That was almost as good as her having a boyfriend, her best friend having one, and then Mob could have been happy through them. But that might have just been a friend kiss, a friends who sometimes kissed, kiss. She didn't know and she knew enough not to go and ask. That would have been awkward.

And also if she said something now then they might have stopped talking to each other…and Mob needed them to talk to each other for as long as possible so that they got along again.

"Hey. I'm still mad at you." Said Minegishi

"And I still love you." Said Shimazaki

"And I'm still not sure if or when I'll ever be able to say it back." Said Minegishi

"I'd love to hear you say it back but, hey, we have a good thing going and I wouldn't want to make you say or do anything that you're not comfortable with, alright? Maybe you won't ever feel it back and maybe you will. Maybe it'll take a really bad trip for you to say it back or something but, hey, at least it would come from a better trip than mine…and I need to stop doing that…" said Shimazaki

"You think? I can't believe you did that…and in front of Mob…and you risked her going to the same place you went to." Said Minegishi. Their aura was pointy again…and it seemed like they had lost their good feelings from before…which was sort of sad…because they had been so happy…and Mob didn't want them to fight anymore. Friends shouldn't fight. It wasn't right at all.

"She didn't, though. I was getting lost in my crappy childhood and she was talking about some Ritsu guy she likes or something. Personally I think that she had a great time." Said Shimazaki

"Uh-huh, yeah. Just don't give her any acid ever again for any reason. Got it?" asked Minegishi

"Fine, if it'll make you happy." Said Shimazaki

"Good….not leave me alone until I'm not pissed at you anymore." Said Minegishi. They sounded mean when they said that but Mob didn't say anything. She couldn't. She still had to pretend to be asleep with her body and her aura…even though so much good stuff had happened…and not so good stuff….because now that she had a name more of the dream memory was coming back…about….he had black hair…whoever he was….

Whoever this Ritsu person was.