Bittersweet
…a few months later
The air was stale. The family took it upon themselves to have a barbeque to 'celebrate'
something that they were under the impression that Drake was going to do. He sat on
the lawn chair in the backyard about to open a bottle of beer. Drake needed to
breathe. He didn't have a relationship with Susannah Wagner like everyone in his
family seemed to think. There were no bells and whistles. There was nothing telling his
heart to pursue things to the next level. That kiss under the Spin City Records awning
in the puke inducing Lifetime movie clichéd light rain didn't do anything to him. The
only thing he got out of that trip was learning that Alan Crimm was a jerk and that the
band was better served self-publishing their own CD's. The sex one month later was
just 'an act'. There was no sense of pleasure. He didn't ask her what she was feeling,
but he swore to himself this had nothing to do with not being able to let go of Emme's
spirit.
"There you are." Susannah sat on the blue lawn chair next to him, "We need to talk."
"Yeah. Yeah we do. But not here." He took a drink from the beer bottle before standing
up. There was no way they could talk in private. Walter would be firing up the grill, Josh
would try to put the big umbrella up over the faded brick colored picnic table but Mindy
would have to come out to finish the job, Audrey and Beverly would be taking care of
the food not minding their gender specific rules despite being modern women, and
Megan would probably be upstairs watching Jenny Penny. She was an introspective
adolescent. But Drake hated to tell her she didn't exactly own that behavior.
"I wouldn't be surprised if Drake pops the question to Susannah today." Audrey said to
Beverly while they were in the kitchen slicing vegetables for the crystal-dipping tray.
"They've had quite a few extended lunches." And how convenient that she started to
offer her nutritionist services for the kids at Emme Jessica's Place as soon as Drake
returned from New York City a few months ago.
Mindy walked by and kept her feelings to herself. There were still a great many things
that she did not like about Drake. As far as Mindy Crenshaw-Nichols was concerned
he was still a conceited, full of himself man who thought he was the savior to teenage
cancer patients. She was sorry, but all she saw was conceit lately. She had a feeling
that he was stringing this nice girl Susannah along for another ride.
"What's wrong, Mindy?" Josh asked trying to put the big umbrella up to shade the
picnic table.
"Your brother's an ass."
There. She said it and helped her husband finish putting up the big yellow and green
striped shade umbrella.
There were some moments where during all his cancer and beyond that he was
changed for the better. Color her skeptical, but Drake Parker was still self-absorbed
and that Emme Jessica's Place was only created to boost his ego.
"Why? Did you and Drake have a fight?"
"No."
"Then why would you say that? Especially after all that he's been through and all that
he's accomplished?"
The reasons she gave didn't matter for Josh Nichols was always going to love his
brother.
Drake hated the extra mayonnaise in Audrey's potato salad it weighed it down and all
you could taste was the goop.
He was glad that Susannah was in agreement over what he had to reveal to the family
today.
"Uncle Drake, do you want half of my hot dog?"
There were times when Drake wished that his precious niece was his daughter.
"Why, Jenny Penny? I think it's because you want to have dessert."
"Drake, I wish you wouldn't open your mouth. I made s-u-g-a-r-f-r-e-e-j-e-l-l-o for her."
Mindy replied
Talk about being uptight.
"I don't want Jello." Jenny whined. Drake smiled. Good for her knowing how to spell.
"I think she could have a piece of pie."
"You're not the parent, Drake."
"Come on, Mindy." Josh intervened.
Good God. Drake didn't know how Josh could handle being married to Mindy. He'd
have jumped off a bridge if he ever had to share living space with her.
"Does anyone want another round of hamburgers and hot dogs?" Walter asked. His
two favorite places were on the golf course and in the backyard at his Weber gas grill
with all of the modern features.
"No, I couldn't eat another bite." Audrey said
"I'll help you clean up." Mrs. Watson offered.
Both of them winking that the sooner they did this the sooner Drake would be making
his announcement, but it wasn't going to be what they wanted to hear.
"I'm going to the mall.." Megan started to say.
"No, you're going to stay here, Megan. It's not everyday we get the whole family here
anymore."
"But they're just Boobs."
Drake was actually grateful for that. Megan was always Megan. There was a great
deal of Parker in her. The need for privacy, the not wanting to intrude on other's
spaces, and a bit of self-interest that mirrored his own when Drake was her age.
By the time the coffee, milk, and water was served with the dessert, with Uncle Drake
able to sneak a piece of apple pie to his favorite niece he couldn't contain the silence
anymore.
"Listen everyone,"
He noticed Audrey and Beverly elbow each other with glee that he was going to say
ask a question to Susannah with a diamond promise.
"I have an announcement to make. I'm not going to mince words. For some reason
there are some people here that think I'm going to propose to Susannah today, well
that's just not going to happen."
Susannah stood up to finish the sentence and speed this moment along,
"We broke up---and before anyone ooh's and aah's over it—It was mutual."
Drake couldn't take any well-meaning questions from anyone although he did want to
slap the smirk off his sister-in-law's face. He took Susannah by the hand and walked
with her to the front of the house.
"I'm sorry that it didn't work out for us, Drake." She sat on the red brick steps.
"It takes two, so there's no need for you to feel that way." Drake sat next to her.
"Friends?" She put her arms around him for a hug and a peck on the cheek. There was
no magic there. Better that they know this now instead of settling for a lifetime of
shared resentment.
"Of course," Drake took his car keys out of his pocket, "Come on, Susannah. I'll take
you home."
When Drake returned everyone was done cleaning up. Audrey relented and let Megan
go to the mall to be with her friends, Walter was on the living room sofa taking a nap,
and Mindy was teaching Jenny how to play checkers at the dining room table.
"Oh, you're back. I'll see you on, Monday, Drake." Mrs. Watson said putting on her
beige cashmere cardigan.
"See you, Mom." He gave Mrs. Watson a hug that had more feeling than the goodbye
one (or any one for that matter) he gave Susannah.
"Where's Josh?" Drake asked his first Mom.
"Upstairs in your old bedroom. Your Dad and I are calling the decorator on Monday so
if there is anything you left behind you might want to grab it now."
"Sure."
Time always marches on. It was just a room. It didn't matter if they turned it into a gym,
den, library, or a bowling alley. It was just a room, although a soundproof recording
studio would be a nice surprise.
"Hey, Josh…"
please no fucking lectures.
"Hi, Drake. I think I'm going to take a few of these license plates. I'm going to put them
up in the garage. Mindy would never let me put them in the house."
Drake was going to let that golden opportunity pass by.
"Do you want the sofa?"
"No. Mindy would never allow it."
Woah. Talk about whipped.
"Good. I can use it in my living room as the sofa bed that came with the apartment is
too small to lay on when you want to watch TV."
Drake sat on the lived in sofa and put his feet up on the coffee table. The only reason
why he didn't claim it was because the previous tenant left a lot of furniture in the
apartment and it was a bigger coffee table with more storage compartments than this
one had.
"I know you don't want to talk about it, Drake, but I am sorry, it didn't work out with you
and Susannah."
"Don't bother yourself with it."
"Daddy! Mommy wants to leave!"
"Come here!" Drake said and scooped his niece up for a big hug and kiss.
"Jenny Penny, did I give you hair noogies and tickles today?"
Josh smiled watching Drake bond with his niece. Mindy was wrong about Drake. Sure
he had his faults like every other homo sapiens on the planet, but he was a wonderful
man and great with children.
"Okay, Sweetie, I'll see you next week." Drake gave her a big hug and kiss on the
cheek.
"Bye, Uncle Drake. Are you coming, Daddy?"
"In a minute."
"Okay."
"Josh, before you ask me, yes, I'm fine. Now go home with your family."
Josh knew better than to push it.
"All right. See you soon, bro. Maybe, I'll join you and Dad on the golf course."
"Loser buys lunch."
"Deal." Josh picked up his license plates and smiled at his brother.
Drake got up and closed the door. He hoped there was still a phone book in here. Yep,
right on the bottom shelf. It was a few years out of date, but that shouldn't be a
problem. He took his credit card out of his wallet.
"Hello. This is Michele from Thrifty Car Rental how may I help you?"
"My name is Drake Parker and I'd like to rent a red convertible for a trip to San
Francisco tomorrow…."
Drake hoped that Mrs. Watson wouldn't be too angry if he took Monday off. His phone
was always on 24/7 and if any of those kids needed him he'd turn the car right around
and drive back to San Diego. He just wanted to have some much needed "Drake
time".
Although, this was a promise he made for Emme regarding their plans on what they
were going to do when they both were declared cancer free this was Drake's treat for
himself. He still drove his Pontiac Ventura. That car just wouldn't quit and he had no
intention on giving it up until it flat lined.
If Susannah taught him one thing it was to not settle. Drake wasn't Billy, and she was
no Emme. Whoever and whenever he was supposed to be with it would happen when
it was meant to.
Things always worked out that way.
There was a knock on the door. He half expected to be Josh but it was his Dad.
"Hey, Dad. I'm taking the sofa for my apartment and I think we could use this coffee
table at the center, if that's okay?"
"Sure. It all has to go."
"Why are you up here?"
"I just wanted to---"
"Check up on me? I'm fine. Really. You have no idea on how mutual this was. Please
explain it to Mom and Josh." No doubt he was going to have to explain it to his other
mother on Tuesday when he returned to work.
"We just want you to be happy."
"I am."
He now understood the feminist rally cry of not needing a man to be fulfilled. The same
logic worked for men too.
"I think I'm going to have some ice-cream. Do you want to join me?"
"I'll take a rain check, Dad. I really need to get going myself." Drake stood up.
"Don't forget our golf date next week."
"I won't. Josh is coming—so there's a lunch neither one of us has to pay for."
Walter laughed. It was good seeing his kids happy.
Drake could've told his folks, but it didn't seem necessary. He needed to clear his
head without any interference.
"So what are you going to do in San Francisco?" Michele from Thrifty asked trying to
make small talk with Drake as he finished signing the rent-a-car application thirty
minutes later.
"I don't know," He held the keys with the green and white Thrifty Rent-a-Car logo key
chain which was to the candy apple red Corvette, "I don't know."
Drake buckled the seatbelt and adjusted the rear view mirror. He put on the radio to
Star 99. He already left a voice mail for Mrs. Watson explaining that he wouldn't be in
until Tuesday.
He wasn't looking to meet his soulmate on this trip. That was cliché to think. Stuff like
that only happens in predictable movies. The first thing he was going to do was drive
to the Quiggly Mart to get a corn dog and a two-liter bottle of Mocha Cola. The second
thing he was going to do was just to concentrate on his driving. Drive for eight hours
(although he was convinced he could finish the trip in six) without a care in the world.
Drive along US-101 with nothing but the wind through his hair and the tunes on the
radio. Yeah, cancer was a bitch, but he survived it. He felt he was a better person
because of it.
Maybe, it wasn't just all about making sure Emme Jessica Watson's legacy was
immortalized. Maybe, it was also making sure that Drake Parker didn't get lost in the
shuffle. The only regret he had in this was that his sweetheart didn't make it.
He knew he'd see her again someday.
For now the only thing the living could do was survive. Survivors had it difficult because
although they lived and beat their illnesses there was a lot of guilt over how come they
made it through to the end of the tunnel and the other person did not?
He didn't have the answers. Therapy didn't help him, but driving along the highway did.
It was a highway to somewhere, but he wasn't quite sure what answers if any he was
going to find on this trip. He didn't want to solve the mystery; he just wanted to live
moment to moment without analyzing every little detail of what was going to happen
next and who he was going to meet along the path of life. The California breeze felt
good on his face as the sunset colored the sky in its burnt orange hues.
I'm going to be okay no matter what.
Drake Parker just wanted to breathe.
THE ENDAuthor's Note: Thanks to all who read and reviewed. Especially Allie, Midie, Jillie,
and Morgan. I'm going to miss this story, but all good things must come to an end. I
do have some ideas for my next one.