It wasn't Sho's birthday.

Sho was born on December first. That was in the winter. It was July now and July was nowhere near December. So he hadn't been expecting any gifts…but he did have a gift. He was getting a gift right now for….some reason. Sometimes he just got presents for no reason, usually from big sis, but this was not from big sis. No, it was from her best friend…and Sho's mortal enemy. Minegishi, best friend stealing no eyebrow having, Toshiki. They were giving him a gift and…and he didn't trust it. It was square, and wrapped in newspaper, and for all he knew it was a bomb or something…or maybe when he unwrapped the paper he would get some terrible disease…or maybe there would be knockout gas and then when he woke up he would be in some room in Korea where he only had a TV to watch and they'd feed him dumplings all day….or something.

Maybe nothing like that, since he hadn't done anything that bad to them, but he did not trust this gift one bit. Not one little itsy bitsy teeny tiny bit.

"The polite thing to do when you're given a gift is to accept it." Said Minegishi. They were holding this square thing in front of them…and Sho watched them. What was their angle? What did they want? Were they trying to get him out of the way so they could be Shimazaki's best friend? Or their girlfriend who was not a girl? He didn't know.

But he knew what he would do if he had been in their place.

He would have gotten rid of Minegishi. He would have bribed them or threatened them so that they would stay away from Shimazaki for the rest of their life. That was just good strategy. They were trying to be best friends with Shimazaki, and were trying to trick him into falling in love with them, and if Sho was trying to do that he would get rid of his only rival. Then he would have Shimazaki all to himself and then he could be the one that Shimazaki hung out with all day and slept next to and kissed….not kissed because that was a weird thing to want from his best friend…but Shimazaki liked girls and boys too….and he was….

Sho decided to focus on the problem at hand.

"You open it first." Said Sho. Minegishi sighed. They had no reason to sigh. They were the one who had come into Sho's house, well to play with big sis but still, and they were the one who was bothering him while he was drawing ideas for new tattoos for Shimazaki. He said that since they were in Toyko, and this was where his tattoo guy lived, he was going to get something new done on his leg and he asked Sho to come up with ideas. That was what he was going to do, what he should have been doing, and what he had been about to lock himself in his room to do if Minegishi hadn't stopped him with a present that he hadn't even asked for.

"Why do you have to be so difficult?" asked Minegishi

"I'm not being difficult. How do I know that you're not trying to kill me? That could be booby trapped or something." Said Sho

"Why in the hell would I go and do a thing like that for?" asked Minegishi

"Because you're trying to be best friends with Shi-with Ryou. You're trying to beat me. I won't let you." Said Sho

"Oh for the love of….yes. There's a plant in here and the minute you open it vines are going to pop out and strangle you to death. Then Ryou and I can spend our days throwing things at people, messing with aquariums, and listening to the same damn album over and over again on a loop. Oh whatever shall I do?" asked Minegishi

"Ha! You confessed!" shouted Sho. He pointed and yelled as loud as he could, so loud that he felt his throat get all red…and that would hurt a lot later….and it hurt a lot now…but it was worth it. Minegishi had confessed and now the whole world would know the truth and then Shimazaki would make him his best friend in the whole world and he would beat Minegishi, who only had boobs going for them really and who cared about boobs, and then he and Shimazaki could hang out all day and…and it would be the best thing ever.

Better than diving into a big pile of cats and rats and mice and hamsters.

And better than going to the bookstore, too, which was Minegishi's idea of fun. Shimazaki didn't even like reading, he liked books on tape because he could do other things while he listened, and there was no way he would like to be dragged into a bookstore and forced to sit there all day reading books and drinking coffee and whatever else Minegishi and big sis had been doing together all day. No amount of boob touches, tongue kisses, and whatever else they did together would make a trip to a bookstore worth it.

So Sho was, clearly, the winner…well he would be…once Shimazaki figured out the Minegishi was fighting dirty.

"Sho, be nice. Don't yell at people, ok?" asked big sis. He could hear her voice carrying from their room. She was putting her books away. Well her manga. She liked to read, too, and Shimazaki wouldn't have wanted to be with her either. So he didn't have to worry about her…and she was in love with Hatori anyway. They were more alike and stuff…so he didn't have to worry about her…

And he wasn't going to start.

Even though his brain was telling him to worry about her. About how she and Shimazaki hung out and smoked together. About how they listened to music and hung out in his room and…and it would have been ok for her to kiss him and let him touch her boobs, and Shimazaki liked boobs for some reason, and Sho didn't because…because he didn't think that they were interesting…and not because he didn't like girls. He just…like girls for their minds…and stuff. Yeah. And he had a girlfriend anyway and he wasn't about to be a weirdo and ask to touch her boobs…or anything like that….

And he was normal, ok!?

"He's fine! You just keep putting your stuff away." said Minegishi. Sho glared at them.

"You didn't have to help me. I could have told her that I was fine." Said Sho. He didn't need help with big sis or with anything. He certainly didn't need help from Minegishi, or gifts, so they could just go back to their own house and be boring there. That would have been best for everyone. Then he could have had some peace to draw Shimazaki's new tattoo and then when he woke up, he was tired from having fun all day which was something that Minegishi wouldn't know if it walked up and peed on their leg, and when he woke up then they could have more fun and Sho would tell him his tattoo ideas and then…and then that would be that….and stuff. It would be good and…and they would be together and…and they would just….be together and stuff. Sho didn't know. His stupid was full of stupid goldfish and he hadn't even DONE anything but think about Shimazaki….and he wondered if Minegishi got a goldfish in their stomach when they thought about Shimazaki….

The thought make his insides fill with ice water.

And now the goldfish in his stomach was swimming in ice water. Minegishi thought about him. Minegishi held his hand. Minegishi kissed him. Minegishi touched him…if they wanted to they could just touch the dragon on his back or his chest….if they just felt like it…and they could do all of that stuff, that adult stuff, with him too…and that was….

Sho wanted to hit them…but he didn't because big sis might not have been in the room but she was home and she would not have liked it if he beat up her best friend…even if they deserved it.

"Yeah, well, I'm just a kind and helpful individual, now aren't I?" asked Minegishi

"I know that you're not serious. What don't you just get lost or something?" Said Sho. He hoped that Minegishi didn't see themselves that way. If they did then they needed to have their head examined. They were the biggest jerk in the whole world! And they were boring! And they had no eyebrows and it was creepy! And they didn't know the first thing about having fun, especially not having fun with Shimazaki. Like…like how they watched TV without the narration on….and also they hated throwing things at people…and they had no idea how to pet a dog so it rolled over on it's belly and wagged it's tale. Really the only thing that Shimazaki liked about them was their boobs and he really should have told them that so that they could just move on already.

Really.

Because Shimazaki did not do the boyfriend and girlfriend thing and also if he did do the boyfriend and girlfriend thing then he would have done that with someone who was fun. Someone who knew how to play and someone who didn't call him stupid when he did fun stuff like make caramel waffles or play 'will it blend' or climb trees to go and play with the baby birds…and stuff. Shimazaki should have just sat down and told them that there was no help and that they needed to find a boyfriend who was more their speed, like a librarian or an old person or one of those people who spent all their time watching the grass grow, and then he and Shimazaki could be…well not…he didn't want Shimazaki to be his boyfriend! Dad would have killed Shimazaki and maybe Sho too!

And also it would have been weird if he wanted his best friend to also be his boyfriend!

So he didn't want Shimazaki to kiss him and hold him and tell him that he was the coolest person in the world! He didn't because they were best friends and….and…and kissing wasn't that great! And he didn't laying bed at night thinking about the best kiss he'd ever had and what it would have been like if it had bene him and Shimazaki all alone in that coatroom and…and he had never thought about that! Not even once in his whole life!

Really!

"Well somebody's getting himself all worked up." Said Minegishi

"….am not." Said Sho. He started to count in his head. His aura had been flaring and…and he had been mad…and he had been mad for no reason. Shimazaki didn't like them that way and…and maybe this present was a surrender gift. Yeah. Maybe they were realizing, now, that there was no hope at all and that they just needed to quit. Yeah, that could work out just fine. This was a truce and now they were going to move on….

He hoped that it would be that easy.

"Ok, fine, you're just a calm little monk. Anyway, my little monk, would you accept this gift if I unwrapped it for you? Or have you given up all worldly possessions." Said Minegishi. They were talking to him like they were making fun of him…and they talked to everyone like that…and that was such a dick move! They were such a fucking dick hole! They were the biggest fucking dick hole in the whole world! They thought that they were so cool and stuff but really they were just a weird looking jerk! And also they had no eyebrows!

None at all!

"Give me that fucking box." Said Sho. He was careful to be quiet enough that big sis couldn't hear. She would get all on his back if she heard him cursing. She had a real problem with that for some reason. He didn't get it. People cursed all the time…but she was his big sis and he wasn't going to cause her any more stress than she had now. She was stressed enough that she had even wet the bed the other night…

So he just took the gift.

Well he would have if Minegishi hadn't pulled it away. He glared at them with his eyes and with his aura. Why did they always have to be such a dick hole? That was worse than being an asshole. He didn't know exactly why but he got the feeling that being a dick hole was worse than being an asshole…but they were just as much of an asshole as they were of a dick hole. They were all the gross holes that a person could be!

And also they had no eyebrows so there!

"Say it nicely. How about something more like this? Yes, Minegishi, I would like my gift now. Thank you for taking the time out of your life to not only get me a gift but wrap it too. Boy am I grateful." Said Minegishi. There was no way in hell Sho was going to say that. There was no way in hell he was going to be nice to them. They didn't deserve it. They were too much of a no eyebrow having dick hole to deserve him being nice.

"Just give me my gift. Or you keep it. I don't give a fucking fuck." Said Sho. He held eye contact with Minegishi. His aura was bright, and it flared, and it pushed right up against their's…and they should have been afraid. They should have been scared. They should have been all 'oh Sho, I'm so sorry that I was such a massive dick hole please forgive me' or something like that. They didn't seem the least bit afraid, though, in fact it didn't even seem like they noticed that he even had an aura…

But someone else noticed.

"Sho? Are you being mean? Do I have to stop alphabetizing my manga?" asked big sis. He didn't know why she did that, alphabetizing it like they lived in a library or something, but he didn't want her to stop. Then she would come out here and then she would be upset and if she had been upset enough to have a bad dream the other night then she didn't need him to be a jerk and make her life any worse.

"We're fine, Mob, so you can just…keep that up. Actually let me help you." Said Minegishi. They rolled their eyes and shoved the present into Sho's arms. Sho stuck his tongue out at them, at their back, and they didn't notice. They didn't notice or care or…or anything! They were just walking over to the bedroom…to HIS bedroom…and he wanted to drag them out and tell them to go back to their own house….

But he didn't.

Big sis would have been upset with him and he didn't want to make her any more upset. Instead he just walked over to the couch and sat down with his gift in his lap. He looked at it. This was a book…or a lot of books. This was either a really thick book or a lot of normal sized books. Neither was something that he wanted. He didn't want to do any reading. It was hard and boring and there was no point in reading since if there was anything worth reading then it was worth putting on tape….and he maybe should have just thrown the gift away….

But he needed to know what was in this present.

He opened the present. He pulled the paper away at the tape. Usually he just ripped off the paper until it was confetti but now…now he was a little more careful in case it had been booby trapped, how it could have been booby trapped he didn't know but Minegishi was always reading books and stuff and they were such a jerk that they probably did stuff like that just to be a jerk…and stuff. They were the biggest jerk in the world…

They were such a jerk that they had left the receipt in the bag….and written a note on it.

"Dear Sho…..that's Suzuki to you…I know that you're going through a lot and I know that you can't help but be a little asshole right now….takes one to know one you dick hole's asshole….and I hope that these books can help. I wish that they had books like this when I was your age….well I'm not you….so you had better read them….you are not the boss of me….and memorize them. Sincerely Minegishi Toshiki." Muttered Sho as he read. Well that was….a note. He put it off to the side…and…oh. There was an arrow pointing to the other side.

"You're either the B, the Q, or the G and there's nothing wrong with that. Don't let anyone try and tell you that there is." Muttered Sho. He didn't know what they meant by B, the Q,, or G so he just put the note down and picked up the first book…manga book. He liked manga but he didn't get this….

There was a long string of letters but he had no idea what it meant.

"Wonderfully LGBTQ….Warmly LGBTQ…..Wishfully LGBTQ….and Wonderfully again? Wat, this one is four….what?" muttered Sho. Well not he was talking to himself like a crazy person…but he had no idea what that word even was. He tried to pronounce it, he spoke pretty good English, but there were no vowels…and also…well maybe if he opened the book it would make more sense…not that he cared about what Minegishi had gotten him…

He opened one at random…and then closed it fast.

Dad would kill him. If dad saw him with books like this then he would kill him. if dad knew…and did Minegishi want…he didn't know. He couldn't think. He just put all four books under his shirt and ran to the bathroom. He closed the door, locked it, and put the hamper in front of it. Then he climbed into the tub, pulled the curtain around him, and then sat down in the tub. He turned the faucet on with his powers just to be safe. Nobody could know about this….about how he had these books…and about how he was…he wasn't anything! So what if he liked girls and boys? He had a girlfriend! She just lived in England and he hardly ever talked to her…and stuff…but she was real and she was alive and she was his girlfriend and she loved him….and he would love her…..eventually….

And he was normal!

He picked up a book and was about to throw it but…but he changed his mind. He didn't want to…to make a loud noise. That would get big sis in here and then she would want to know what was wrong. He didn't want to tell her that her friend was a jerk who was trying to get him in trouble….even though they said that these books were to help him…and they said that they wished that there had been books like this when they had been his age….and stuff…so maybe they weren't trying to get him in trouble….

And maybe it wouldn't have been such a bad thing to read this….since he already had them….

He opened one up and….oh. This one was about…people who were like Minegishi…not boys or girls he flipped some more. Boys who were girls on the inside and girls who were boys on the inside…and he had always wondered about Minegishi….he would read this later. He was a boy on the inside and the outside. The only reason he wanted to be Shoko would have been to have been able to be Shimazaki's girlfriend…because that would have been normal….and he would have been normal…because he wasn't normal now and….he just…he was in love with Shimazaki and….

And he flipped through the books some more.

He flipped through them until he found a story about a boy who liked another boy…sort of like how he was….the same way. He liked….he liked the coolest guy in the world and…and he felt weird about it…like the kid in the story…and his dad would have been mad at him if he knew…like the kid in the story…and this was just…he felt….it was just….nice…to see…

He had never seen anything like this before.

He had seen people who liked….people who were the same before. Sometimes when he had been places where there had been families there had been families with two moms and two dads…and stuff. Sho…he knew that there were other people like him, Shimazaki was like him, but he had never seen it in a book…like it was just…normal. A normal way to be….and stuff. Being in love with…with someone who was like you….being in love with another boy….and stuff…

He had never seen a book like this before.

Part of him wanted to thank Minegishi. He wanted to come out of the bathroom and thank them for this…even though they were trying to take Shimazaki from him…and stuff….but this had still been a nice gift….and stuff. But they were still trying to get Shimazaki to like them…and they were still a dick hole's asshole…but they were also…just….not so bad. Not great, not really, but not so bad.

They had given him a gift, a nice gift, when it wasn't even his birthday….so they were ok. Just ok.