Mob didn't really know how to cook.
She knew how to make breakfast, mostly, and that wasn't really cooking. Just making omelets and putting ketchup on them and scooping rice and nato and cutting up vegetables and tiny pickles…and pouring milk into cereal when she and Sho were just having breakfast on their own. This was not cooking…but dad didn't seem to mind. Even if he had just eaten the same exact thing, omelets and ketchup and nato and rice and pickled vegetables, for breakfast.
As long as dad didn't mind then it was ok.
"Are you almost done?" asked Dad. Mob nodded with her back turned to him…and she knew that she was being rude…but she had to watch the food or it would burn and then they wouldn't have anything to eat and dad would be mad…and she didn't want dad to be mad. He had been really nice that morning, he had managed to talk to Sho without hitting him, and she didn't want to upset him. Not that Sho was home right now, and not that she ever got punished, but still. She didn't want to make him upset. They had to have a nice dinner.
"Just a second, dad." Said Mob. It was more polite to talk. She wanted them to have a nice dinner and to have a nice dinner she needed to be polite…so that was what she was going to do. She was going to be good and polite and she was going to get dinner on the table and then she and dad would eat and then she would be able to go to her room and be alone…and she needed to be alone for…reasons…
All kinds of reasons.
But first she needed to get dinner on the table. She usually plated Sho's food for him, he always took either all of one thing or nothing from anything, but dad was an adult and he could pick out his own portions. So she just used her powers to put everything on the table. She didn't drop anything. She was careful, well she had to be careful, because she had a lot on her mind…not that dad needed to know what she had been thinking about…
Nobody could know, ever, what she had been thinking about for this whole day. Not even her own dad.
"Careful." Said Dad
"Dad, I have this." said Mob
"Still, Daughter, be careful, I wouldn't want anything to happen to you." Said dad. She felt him reaching over with his powers…and she could do this herself. She wasn't a baby and she could do this on her own…and also if she all of a sudden needed help then dad might have asked why she needed help…because he could be surprisingly nosy sometimes. Not that she would ever call her dad nosy to his face…and not that she should even have been thinking of him as nosy…but he really could be sort of nosy sometimes…
And this was not one of those times when she wanted him to be nosy.
Not that she ever wanted him to be nosy. That was why Sho had gotten upset, maybe, because dad had been getting all nosy and into his life and stuff. He had asked about the present that Sho had made for Emmy and then he had gotten upset…and Mob didn't know why…but she did know that Sho didn't want dad to know about all of that. It was a sort of a…thing…for him because Fukuda had betrayed him…but Mob didn't want to think about Fukuda or how he had betrayed Sho…or all of the other things that he had done…
She just wanted to think about getting dinner on the table for her and her dad. That was all.
"Here you go, dad, I hope you like it." Said Mob as she finished putting everything down on the table. She put his omelet with rice in front of him and his ketchup glass. He liked to pick up food with his fork and then dip it in a glass of ketchup…and Mob got the feeling that it wasn't good manners to do that but she didn't want to tell dad what to do. He didn't like it and also if she told dad not to do that then she would have to fight with Sho about his cup of ranch dressing and she didn't want to fight with Sho. Not that he was there, he and Shimazaki were having a sleepover, but even with him not being there she wasn't about to fight with dad at the dinner table…or ever.
"Thank you. Delicious as usual, Daughter." Said dad even though he hadn't even taken a single bite. She didn't know how he could say that without even tasting it. For all he knew she could have messed up. Her mind had been elsewhere when she had been cooking…not that she was going to tell him that her mind had been elsewhere…because then he would ask what had been on her mind and she didn't want to lie to him…but she also was not going to tell him the truth…
Because she absolutely did not want to talk about this with her dad.
She hadn't even been able to talk about this with Minegishi and they had been born a girl. This was…Mob wasn't sure what it was…well what it had been. She wasn't sure what it had been aside from the fact that it had felt good and that she sort of wanted to do it again…even though it felt gross too…like she was doing something gross….because it was gross…but also good…but also….
Also something that she was not going to think about while she was eating dinner with her dad.
Instead she picked up her fork and ate her food. She didn't much care that she had made the same thing for breakfast. She was just happy to have been able to share this meal with dad…hopefully not for too long…she checked her phone. She loved her dad, she loved a lot, but she also wanted to be alone for…reasons. Personal reasons that dad didn't need to know about. She had her room to herself tonight and…and that was nice for….reasons.
Reasons which she was going to do her best not to think about.
She started to eat. The sooner she ate the sooner she would be done the sooner she would be able to go to her room and….figure something out. Something that had been on her mind all day. Something which was something and…and she was just…going to figure it out and then…and then that was that. She had taken her bath already, and she was going to let Sho skip his bath tonight because he was at a sleepover and she didn't want to fight with him, so she could just…be alone tonight….that is unless dad wanted to hang out….
He was looking at her like he wanted to hang out.
His eyes were on her and his aura was on her and she knew that when he got like that he wanted to hang out. She knew that he loved her the most out of anyone else and she knew that she had to be a good daughter…but she also knew that this was not a Sunday. Their day together was Sunday and yes, sometimes, on days other than Sunday they hung out…but this was not going to be one of those days. This was going to be one of those days when they ate dinner and did their own thing and waited for Sunday to happen…
Even if it did make dad kind of sad….and she did hate it when her dad was sad….
"Dad….are you ok?" asked Mob. If dad wanted to hang out with her…and he was sad…then she would hang out with him…even if she wanted to be alone for…many reasons. She loved her dad and she wanted him to be happy and when you loved someone then you put their feelings ahead of your own…and stuff.
"I'm fine, why do you ask?" asked Dad. Mob….well she couldn't lie to him…but she also couldn't tell him the whole truth. She couldn't tell him that she wanted to be alone and that she was hoping that he didn't want them to hang out…even though he always wanted them to hang out…but she would only hang out if he asked…because she did want to be alone since Sho almost never slept away from home…not since Fukuda had betrayed him…
But dad didn't need to know about all of that.
"Because you were looking at me like you weren't fine." Said Mob. There. That was also the truth. Dad had been looking at her like…like he had been lonely…like he had wanted them to hang out…and she did want to make him happy…but she also wanted to be happy…and sometimes it was hard juggling her own happiness and someone else's….but maybe you weren't meant to juggle happiness. Maybe you were meant to just….do everything you could to make the people you love happy.
"I wasn't trying to look at you in any particular way, I just enjoy looking at you, we've spent our entire day apart." Said Suzuki. Mob….didn't know what he meant there. Well she knew what he said, the words and their meanings, but she had to translate this into dad. He hated admitting weakness, and he had a weird definition of weakness, so he might have just been saying what those words meant or….or he was just trying to tell her that he was lonely and he wanted to hang out. Dad could be very hard to understand sometimes.
"We had breakfast together. Remember?" asked Mob
"Yes, I remember….but we still spent the rest of the day apart." Said Dad
"We did….were you lonely?" asked Mob. She didn't want to spend the whole night trying to translate all of this from dad to Mob. She just…she wanted him to tell her if he wanted to hang out or not, if he was lonely or not, and then she would hang out with him…even though she had some stuff to figure out. A lot of stuff….stuff that she wished that mom had been around to help her figure out…
Because mom was a girl.
Mom was a girl and she was a girl and also she was her mom…and she had been in love before…and she had done more than kiss before…not that she wanted to think about her mom and dad doing that. Mom just…she knew about those things because she had done those things twice to get her and Sho…so she knew about this, about the stuff that Mob…didn't know about. Not that she wanted to do all of that! No! At least she thought that she didn't….but what she had done that morning had to do with all of that…so did that mean that she wanted to do all of that but just hadn't realized it? And why did she always think about Hatori? Was she in love with him again? Or did she just want to know what it was like to kiss hi…and stuff?
Mom could have helped her with that if she had been around.
But mom was not around. Mom was…she was somewhere…and Mob was all alone with dad. Not that she would ever even begin to talk to dad about that. If she hadn't asked dad why her breasts hurt all the time, even when she didn't touch them, and if she hadn't asked dad why she had woken up one day all covered in hair like a werewolf, and if she hadn't asked dad how you could tell if you were in love then she certainly wasn't going to ask dad about…about what she had figured out that morning…
What she had figured out about the good feelings…yeah, dad did not need to know about that.
"I…no. Well for you, of course, but Hatori kept me company. I feel like he may be the lonely one. I had thought that he would make friends with Fukuda but they don't seem to get on. It might be the age difference…because they are very compatible. If Hatori had been a woman I would have suggested that they marry. They would have gotten on so well…and their children…well I am curious about what sort of children they would make." Said dad. Mob…she did not want to talk about Hatori. At even the mention of Hatori her insides started to squirm and she had to hold her hair down or it would start to float away. She didn't want to think about Hatori or be near him or…well she did. She wanted to think about him every day and she wanted to be near him and she wanted…
A lot of stuff that she did not want to think about with her dad sitting right across from her…so it was best that she changed the subject.
"Fukuda doesn't get along with anyone. He fights with everyone all the time…but especially on planes." Said Mob. She knew that she was being sort of mean there but…but he did fight with everyone! Sho said that he was turning into a grumpy old man…but he was the same age as dad and dad wasn't getting old…well he was sort of grumpy a lot of the time…but he had been that way when she had been little. He didn't act like Fukuda, either, and Mob…she at least wanted to know what was up with Fukuda because then…then it might have been something that she could fix…
Even though she really did not want to have to spend any more time with him than was necessary.
She pulled her sweater tighter around herself. She wondered what Fukuda would have to say about her now. She was…she was starting to think about all the stuff that Fukuda thought that she was doing, not with Shimazaki though because that was just….not something that she would ever do to Minegishi, but she was thinking about…stuff….and that had led to the good feelings…and when she got good feelings she got sort of….well….gross. Sort of like she had wet herself but also not…and she just…she had no idea if that was normal or if something was wrong with her and she was sick or dying….
But she would not be asking Fukuda about that. No way.
"Really? He's disliked? Fukuda?" asked dad. He said that like it was news to him. He had been on the same plane, all of the times, as she had been. He hadn't noticed…well he had been busy with Minecraft and Terraria and work stuff…so he might not have noticed at all how everyone was on the plane…when Fukuda got them all fighting with each other.
"You didn't realize? But we fight on every single plane ride." asked Mob
"Well I knew that planes rides usually ended in quarrels but I just figured that your friends were a quarrelsome bunch." Said dad. Dad…wasn't wrong. They fought a lot, well Shimazaki upset people so they fought, but Shimazaki…well he didn't do it to be mean…well he sometimes did…but he was a different kind of mean than Fukuda. Shimazaki was mean because he liked to bother people. Fukuda was mean because he was bothered by people….and Mob had no idea what she or anyone else, besides Shimazaki, had ever done to him…
But if there was a way to make it better then she would.
"They can be…but Fukuda…he says stuff that…sometimes people can take as mean…and they don't really like him." said Mob. She didn't know how to put this in words that dad could understand. He spoke Japanese, he knew what she was saying, but sometimes he just didn't get it. He was even more clueless than she was a lot of the time….but that was maybe because he was all dad. She was only half of him and half of mom.
"Oh. He was always very sociable when we were young. We spent more time socializing than working on our school work, back then, and even in university too. I could get away with it, of course, but Fukuda…well he needed my help with his coursework on more than one occasion." Said dad. He seemed….well sort of happy there. Dad happy. He didn't talk about it that often, when he was a kid, and she just…she was having trouble picturing him as a kid. She knew that everyone started off as a kid but dad…it felt like he had started off as…as dad. It was so hard to imagine him and Fukuda as best friends…and Sho said that he and Fukuda had been best friends when they were kids and Sho didn't tell lies. Well at least she hoped that he didn't.
"Dad….were you and him best friends? Because Sho says that you were but…you never act like best friends." Said Mob. She and Minegishi were best friends, and Sho and Shimazaki were best friends, and also she suspected that Shibata and Hatori were best friends…and she knew how best friends acted. Dad never acted like best friends with Fukuda…but that may have been one of those things that he just didn't know how to do. She could teach him if he didn't know how. She was already teaching him how to be a better dad to Sho so she could teach him how to be a good friend to Fukuda…and maybe if she taught dad how to be a good friend to Fukuda then Fukuda would like her again.
"We are…well I suppose that he never declared us to be enemies….and I'm not even sure what you mean by 'acting like best friends' because….well…we aren't enemies. Try to speak more precisely. I have…difficulties…with the layers of meaning." Said dad. Mob would have hugged dad if they had been standing up. That was good. Dad had admitted that he had a problem with something…and that was very hard for him. He had told her so. He told her that he and mom used to fight because he didn't know how to understand her or how to make himself understood….and Mob really wished that he had told mom this so that they could have stayed together…but she was always very happy to help out her dad.
"It's ok, I have trouble with it too. I think that I get it from you. Anyway I just meant that you guys never come over to each other's houses and you never play games together or talk about stuff…sort of like how you and Hatori are. You and Hatori act more like best friends than you and dad." Said Mob. She wasn't going to make a big deal out of dad admitting that he was bad at something to her. She was just going to be happy about this in her head…and also maybe show dad that he had a better best friend in Hatori…because then he would be around all the time and…and now she was being selfish. She needed to help dad be better friends with Fukuda. She needed to help him and Fukuda because they had known each other since before she had been born….but Hatori really was the better friend than Fukuda. He was nicer and also he didn't say mean things to people. He didn't even know how to say mean things.
He was always so nice.
He always smile when he saw her…and when they played animal crossing he always visited her house and told her how nice it was…and also he had taught her about animal crossing…and also when they played Minecraft he showed her how to make cool ice palaces…and also…also he modded it for her and….and he was always thinking about her…and he always smelled so nice. She liked sitting close to him, because they had to share a screen, and just…the way he smelled was nice…and he always had the nicest sweaters on…and he almost never had spots on his face these days…and she had never minded his spots and…and he was just…
He was really great…and she needed to stop thinking about him before…she started feeling….good feelings again.
"Well he and I have gotten older. We did that a lot when we were young, a little bit older than you are now, but we were children then. Things changed, life changed, and now we're here. I suppose that I spend more time with Hatori because he's younger and…and that's just how it is with people his age. I don't care for him any more than I care for Fukuda. I suppose that Fukuda is still my best friend, because he is my oldest friend, but Hatori is very good company as well." Said dad
"That makes sense…but I hope that me and Minegishi stay as good of friends as we are now for the rest of our lives. They're my best friend." Said Mob. She and Minegishi hug out every say and talked about stuff and read stuff and watched TV and gardened and…and she didn't want the two of them to end up like dad and Fukuda….but she would work harder at friendship than dad ever had. There. Then she and Minegishi would be friends even when they were forty four…well Mob would be forty four and Minegishi would be…they were seventeen years older than her….and that was a lot of math to do in her head. They would be at least fifty. It was hard to add that much in her head, with all of those digits, she usually just used her calculator. It didn't matter. Even if they lived to be a hundred and a hundred seventeen, that was easier math because of all the zeros, then they would still be best friends.
Even when they were spirits they would still be best friends.
"Yes….Minegishi. May I ask you something about them?" asked dad
"Asking me if you can ask me is already asking me but, yes, you can ask me." Said Mob. Dad stared at her for a minute before shaking his head. She smiled. Dad looked so…well he looked like something. He was usually the master of 'conceal, don't feel' but there he was shaking his head like he had water in his ears. If Sho had been there then he would have laughed…and then dad would have gotten mad…even though he didn't need to get mad at Sho as often as he did….but Mob was making progress with dad about getting mad at Sho for every little thing all the time.
"I…do not follow." Said dad
"Nothing. Just…what did you want to ask me?" asked Mob
"Minegishi…they're female, right? Because they have very short hair and wear men's clothes but they have a very feminine face and build…and I've always been curious. Their file…well I suspect that they've been changing it, says that it's none of the reader's business….even though I'm the head of Claw and everything in Claw is my business and I have been tempted to ask them but-" said dad. What?! No! What HAPPENED in his brain that he even THOUGHT of asking them, of asking Minegishi, about their…about…about…about….just…DAD?! WHY?!
"Dad! You can't just ask people if they're a boy or a girl!" said Mob. Minegishi would not have liked that question…because they had said before that unless someone was trying to date them then it was none of anyone's business…and also dad would have been asking about their privates and…and they only answered people who wanted to date them….and the thought of dad dating them….
That was just plain wrong.
Sure Mob loved Minegishi, and if she had to have another parent she would have wanted the other parent to be just like Minegishi, but she didn't want that parent to BE Minegishi…because that would have meant that dad and Minegishi would have gotten married….and Minegishi would have been so unhappy with dad. Also they would have had to kiss dad and…and do other stuff with him….and that was just…wrong. Totally and completely wrong. There was nothing right about that…and also how would Shimazaki have felt? He was so in love with Minegishi that he would have been completely devastated if Minegishi left him for dad…and she just…
She did not want Minegishi for her parent, just for her friend, and she didn't want another parent unless her name was Suzuki Masami.
Her mom Suzuki Masami, not some other woman with the same name, since there were a lot of Suzuki's in the world and a lot of people named Masami and she didn't want some other woman posing as her mother! She wanted her mother! She wanted her mother back! She wanted….to calm down. She didn't even know what she was so upset about. Mom was gone and she was never coming back…and also…also dad wasn't going to find another mom for her.
He still had his wedding ring on.
That meant that he was still married to mom. Wedding rings were sacred, almost as sacred as best friend bracelets, and dad still wore his so he was still married to mom and he was still in love with her and he would never leave her…and stuff. Well she had left him but…but it wasn't like he…he LIKED anyone. He couldn't. He was married…and besides….girls didn't like him. There weren't even any girls in Claw for him to like and to like him…well there had been that one lady when she had been eight….Minegishi said that the lady in Korea had wanted to be boyfriend and girlfriend with dad…and she had always been talking to him and smiling at him…like she liked him….
She had nothing to be mad about since dad hadn't liked her back, he couldn't like her or any girl back, and she was just worried about nothing.
"I know that it's an offensive question. I would be offended if someone mistook me for a woman…no offense. I have nothing against your gender. Actually I hold your gender in high regard. You naturally have skills that I will never have. I simply would not want to be mistaken for anything other than a man." Said dad. Mob shook her head. He didn't get it…but that was ok. He didn't get a lot of things…and also she had been crazy to think of him ever liking Minegishi like that. He would never…and Minegishi never would have liked him back. Not even for…whatever they had with Shimazaki…and Mob was going to stop thinking about this now.
"Dad…it's not about that. It's about you asking about someone's privates. You shouldn't do that." Said Mob. She didn't know if she had said that wrong, she might have, because dad was pulling his aura in close….and he was looking away from her…and maybe that was because she had said privates at the dinner table…but he had been the one asking about Minegishi and also privates was the polite way of saying it. She knew a bunch of curse words for them, Sho knew A LOT of curse words, and she was sure that there must have been non curse words for them, like long science words, but she didn't know any long science words and she didn't want to Google, she had no idea what she would have found, so she was just going to say privates…
And also Dad was the one asking about Minegishi…what they were…even though he had known them for years and he should have known that they were a 'they' by now…and Mob was happy that they would have made a truly terrible couple…and she should not have been happy about that but she was.
"I…had not looked at it that way…and now that I am I can see why your aura is…that way. Thank you, Daughter." Said dad
"It's ok…and also Minegishi is a 'they'. They were born one thing but now they're just a 'they'." Said Mob. She didn't know if it was ok to tell dad that they had been born a girl. Probably not, she decided, since if they had wanted people to know that they had been born a girl then they would have told people that…well everyone knew because Fukuda had said all of that mean stuff about their breasts…but thankfully dad had been too busy doing dad stuff to notice.
"I…don't understand." Said dad. Mob was happy that he was admitting that he didn't understand something but also…also she didn't know what there was to not understand. They wanted to be called they, not she, and that was easy in Japanese. You just had to use the gender neutral conjugation.
"Me neither but we don't have to understand, we just have to call them what they want to be called, otherwise we're being jerks." Said Mob. She knew that she was being sort of mean but…but calling someone something that they didn't want to be called was mean.
"Daughter….your generation has made everything even more complicated than it has ever needed to be." Said dad. Mob didn't know if it was complicated or not. Just call someone what they wanted to be called. It seemed simple enough to her…but then again she was clueless. Maybe it was complicated and she was missing something. She didn't know.
"I don't think that it's that complicated." Said Mob. Maybe dad was the one who was being clueless here. That would have made more sense. He was even more clueless than she was a lot of the time…and she knew that she was being mean to think thoughts like that but she was only thinking the truth.
"It is. When I was a child you were what you were and you didn't get to choose…but your generation seems to really enjoy choice…choice and over complicated. When I was a child everything was what it was and everyone was what it was….and I have never felt this old in my life…and I thought that Hatori was difficult to understand." Said dad
"You're not old, dad, you're forty four." Said Mob. To her that seemed old but she knew that people lived to be a hundred sometimes…and she really wanted dad to live that long…but she also didn't want him to get old. He already squinted when he read and had trouble getting up sometimes because his back hurt…and she wanted him to stay the way he was now for the rest of her life.
"That's old….that's middle aged. You'll understand in thirty three years. Or sooner. You're very bright, you know, you're very good at these social sort of things." Said dad. He smiled at her, with his aura, while he said that. She smiled back with her face and her aura. Maybe if she smiled at dad enough he would learn how to smile both ways.
"Thanks." Said Mob. She didn't think that she was good at talking and stuff but compared to dad she supposed to that she was practically an expert.
"You're welcome. You've always been so social….you'll enjoy Comiket. It's a very social place…well it was in 1987….yes. You'll have fun…but stay away from the doujinshi which is sold in paper bags. I won't tell you why, you're too young to know about that, but you need to stay away from any doujinshi which are sold in brown paper bags." Said Dad. Mob…she knew what was in those books….and she didn't want to think about her dad knowing what was in those books…but she also just…had no clue what he was talking about.
"Dad…what's Comkiet?" asked Mob. She wondered if that was a place that they would go for their Sunday together….it was nice of him to warn her…since he never warned her…not that the name told her anything aside from the fact that they sold comics there….and she did like comics….
"Oh. Hatori hasn't asked you to go with him yet?" asked dad. Mob wondered if she had hit her head or if there was a gas leak in the house or if she had gotten really stoned and forgotten about it, that happened sometimes, because dad had just said that Hatori wanted…to go somewhere…with her. He wanted to ask her to go to a place with him…just the two of them…to a place….with just them…like…like he was planning…like he was going to….
Was he going to ask her out on a DATE!?
She had NEVER been on a date before! Ever! She didn't even know what people did on dates! They…they went places…and ate food…and held hands…and kissed….what!? Hatori…he didn't like girls...or maybe he did because he had liked Minegishi…or maybe he had thought that they were a boy…or maybe…she didn't know! Maybe he just…she had no clue…but he just…maybe he just wanted to eat her? She wouldn't let him, she wanted to live, and people were not food…but he didn't eat his friends. He would have done it already if he had been planning on eating them…but then just…what!? He was going to…to ask her….
Did he think that she liked him?
Dad…dad had told him…that she liked him…which was why she had been avoiding him…even though Minegishi had told her that she was being ridiculous….but still. Did he think that she liked him? Did she like him? Or did she just want to kiss him and also hold his hand and let him feel her up…maybe….well if he wanted to then he could….and she needed to stop her brain up. She was eating, now, so that dad thought that she was just…not thinking about Hatori picking her up and laying her down on her bed and kissing her and holding her hand and then….and she needed to just shut her brain up….and she just…she just….
She needed to stop eating like a crazy person and he needed to act normal before dad got suspicious.
"Hatori…wants me to go with him somewhere?" asked Mob after she chewed, swallowed, and took a big drink of strawberry milk. Ok then. Hatori wanted to go on a date with her…and he had asked dad for his….permission? Well that had been…she supposed that it made sense…but dad had said yes? That was…unexpected…but nice. She…she was…
She was allowed to have a boyfriend…..
Did Hatori want to be her boyfriend? Did this mean that he liked her back and he wanted to be boyfriend and girlfriend with her? But…but she had never had a boyfriend before. The closest she had ever come to being in a relationship was back in the first grade…and she hadn't even done anything…and she had kissed a boy when she had been nine…but she was eleven now and that was a lot of time spent not kissing…and she didn't know how to kiss…or how to do the other stuff…and she wasn't even sure if she was ready for the other stuff…and also Minori had said that they needed to have friends with benefits before they had boyfriends…and she wanted a boyfriend and….
And she drank some more strawberry milk.
"Yes. To Comiket. It's a market where doujinshi, games, tapes, laser disks….well maybe not the tapes and laser disks anymore…but it's a place to shop and meet other people who are fans of things. He asked me this afternoon to go with him, well he asked our whole family, but he's just going to ask you now. You should go. I think that you would enjoy yourself immensely." Said dad. Mob…so he was giving her permission to go out with Hatori…and this was…she felt…a little dizzy. She wasn't even sure if she was in love with Hatori or she just thought that he was attractive like Minegishi said but…but this might have been her only chance at ever having a boyfriend since dad….well he always talked about them spending their lives together and he had never talked about their being room for her husband or boyfriend or whatever…
This was great and she had no reason to feel dizzy.
"That sounds fun…and I would love to go with Hatori…if you think that it's ok…um….yeah. That sounds really good and um…I'm going…to my room to…lay down now…because my food is done and…and I'll do the dishes tomorrow. Goodnight!" said Mob as she used her powers to put her plate in the sink. She rushed off from the table, dad may have said goodnight right back but she hadn't heard him. She couldn't hear anything above the sound of her pulse in her ears and her heart trying to get out of her chest and…
And this was…
She didn't know what this was. Exciting. New. Kind of scary. But most of all…most of all just…the good feeling was back. Well all of the good feelings were back but THE feeling was back….and it was back because…because he liked her. He liked her and…and he would want to kiss her and…and stuff and…and she just…
She laid down on her bed.
She laid down under the covers so that she could not be seen. She didn't want to be seen even though she knew that she wasn't doing anything wrong…and also there was no one else in the room. Not even spirits. Sho was sleeping over next door, dad was eating breakfast, and mom was off to part unknown. She was alone and she was happy and she had never been this happy before….but also she was scared…because she had never thought that he would like her back…and he was a lot older than her…and he probably wanted to kiss her and more than kiss and….and she had never more than kissed anyone before and…and this whole thing was just…she was just….she didn't know what she was….she just knew that she felt…
Good and bad at the same time.
And she…she knew this feeling…and she had felt this feeling before…but never so much and….and she sort of…she sort of liked it. She wanted…she was alone and she could have…there was that thing that she had figured out and...and she was happy but nervous and scared and…and also he liked her back and…and since he liked her back did that make this ok? Or did it make it not ok…or was it just…not something that was not ok but…but also she felt so gross…
Really gross.
She pulled her sweater close. She should not have been feeling this way. Fukuda had said that she did stuff with people and she knew that feeling this way had to do with stuff…and she wasn't sure if she even knew what stuff was let alone if she was ready for it but…but she also…she didn't want to feel gross and…and she just….Minegishi said that this was normal. She let go of her sweater. If they said that this was normal then…then they would never have lied to her…so this was normal. This was normal and she was normal and…and everything that came next was normal….
She rolled onto her side.
Was this normal? This feeling…the slimy sort of feeling…and also what she had done before and….and what she sort of wanted to do again? She couldn't ask anyone, not even Google, but she could just…it wasn't like anyone was there in the room with her and…and she was happy. She was happy and she was not going to let gross feelings ruin her happiness…because this was what she had always wanted. A boy who liked her. A boyfriend. A boy to kiss and hold hands with…and whatever…this was. This thing where she sort of rocked against…whatever stuffed animal she was laying on….
Hopefully not anyone with a name.
Hopefully not Olaf, she had a lot of him, or Elsa or Anna. She didn't know. Her eyes were closed. Her eyes were closed and she was in her head and in her head she was…whatever this was…with Hatori and he said that he liked her and he kissed her and…and she kissed him and…and it was ok to think about kissing him because he liked her in real life and…and this was ok and not gross because they liked each other and…and ok it was gross but also nice…so nice…the nicest thing ever and-
And the lights went out.
Then they came back on again…and that had been her…her powers messed with the electricity sometimes…and also she picked stuff up and threw it around…and judging by the sound of stuff falling she had done that too…..and she just…she was tired. She had never been this tired in her life….that she could remember…but she was tired now and she just wanted to stay under her blanket and close her eyes and go to sleep…even though was still in her day clothes…and she felt all wet and slimy and gross…but she was so tired and…
And she heard her door start to open.
She didn't think. She just slammed it shut. She slammed it shut as hard as she could….which had been mean but…
But she did not want anyone anywhere NEAR her! Nope. Not happening. She sat up and pulled her blanket close to her chest. She was fully dressed but felt completely naked…and she just…she just did not want to talk to anyone. Even if that had been Sho coming home to sleep in his own bed…even if that had been dad coming to tell her that he was lonely and he needed her company…and even if that had been mom back from parts unknown ready to explain where she had gone to and why….
She didn't want ANYONE near her!
"Daughter? You slammed the door in my face." Said Dad. Well it hadn't been mom but…but she especially did not want to talk to her DAD ABOUT THIS! What did he think that he was doing? Just coming into people's bedrooms like that? What if she had been naked? What if she had been completely naked and he had opened that door!? Then what!?
"Yes….I know that I was mean but….but I could have been naked in here! You have to knock!" said Mob
"This…this is my house…" said dad slowly. So? This was her room and she could have been naked and…and she never just let herself into his room and just…..she just needed five minuet to privacy!
"I could have been naked!" shouted Mob. The lights flickered again…and that had not been nice at all…and she should have been nice…but she could be nice tomorrow! Right now she just…she needed….she needed to calm down and…and she just….she needed to be alone!
"Oh….well I bathed you when you were small…" said dad. Did he think that she was still a baby?! She just…she couldn't…she just…she just didn't….she just wanted to be alone!
"Dad! I am not a baby anymore! Just….I'm fine and I'm very sorry that I'm yelling at you and please just…I need to be alone. Ok?" asked Mob. She had her legs crossed as close as she could and she had her blanket up to her chest and she was wearing clothes but she felt like she wasn't and…and she did not want to be taking to her dad while she felt like this!
"Oh…alright. I was concerned and…and I'll just leave you be….goodnight again." said dad. Mob heard him walking away and…and she did not come out of bed. Not until she heard his bedroom door closing. Once his door closed she could sit up and uncross her legs and…and she could just….well she would have to change and…and not think about…..
She did not want to think about anything else for the rest of the night.
She thought about….about how her clothes went in the dirty hamper and about how…how she would have to clean her room…and Sho's side of the room…and she would have to do some laundry because….because her underwear and the front of her skirt were gross and…and she had to do laundry tomorrow and she had to…to make breakfast and…and dinner and maybe she would cook something new…..and that was a good thing to think about…..because cooking was old and safe and…
And she didn't really know how to cook but…but she could learn and…and that would be a good thing to think about because….because she just….did not want to think about…about good feelings or bad feelings or love or…or anything.
She just wanted to be alone.