Hatori did not want to get up that morning.
He never wanted to get up any morning. It was too damn early…but he had to get up and get to school. He had a test today, a math test, and…well he didn't want to take it but he had to. Thank God he got to use a calculator. Thank God that his teacher had no idea what you could program a graphing calculator…and thank God that nobody knew what he could do….because then he would have been fucked. Nope. He was going to get through third year the same way he had gotten through first year and second year.
A hell of a lot of cheating.
"Hatori! Breakfast time!"
That was weird. Mom never called him Hatori. Whatever. He was going to get up…eventually. Right now he just wanted to be warm and comfy for a little bit. He reached out and felt….well it felt like he should have been feeling….well it felt weird. Like….like there were other people or…or something. He didn't know. He just knew that he didn't want to get out of bed. He had a test today and he hated tests and he knew that mom would look through his bag and take his calculator away, she knew all of his tricks, and then dad would back him up and then they'd take his laptop away and his phone and his TV because without that stupid calculator he was going to fail and…
And something bad was going to happen.
Something bad was going to happen and…and he didn't want to go to school today. He didn't want to go to school today because…mom and dad were going to kill him for failing and he didn't much feel like getting killed so…he didn't feel like dying. He didn't feel like anyone dying. So he wasn't going to get out of bed. He was fifteen years old and he could decide for himself when he was and was not going to get out of bed. He was fifteen years old and he could decide for himself if he was and was not going to go to school and mom and dad….he loved them so much…and he wanted to see them…and he wanted to get out of bed and….
"Hatori! Time for breakfast!"
Hatori never got to sleep in these days.
"I'm up! I'm up!" said Hatori as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. The world was blurry. The room was bright…he had forgotten to close the blinds again…and the light was not his friend right now. He reached up to grab the cord for the blinds but missed, no glasses no depth perception, and hit the stack of manga he had left on his windowsill.
It was poetic, actually, that it was Evangelion manga since it all came tumbling down.
He was funny in his own head. He'd had to save that one for Suzuki. He'd think that it was funny…well maybe not. He had said before that he was incapable of laughing…but everyone could laugh. If babies could laugh, and they had no idea what comedy even was, then Suzuki was capable of laughing. He just might not have found it funny since Mob had said that they hadn't watched past the first movie…which in retrospect was a good thing since…well the once scene which he had forgotten about but had things in it that a little girl should not have seen….god. Being a responsible adult was exhausting. He stacked his manga back up on the windowsill. Responsible adults probably put their books on shelves…or whatever. Also they didn't spend the whole day sitting in bed even though they really wanted to. Responsible adults had work to do and having work to do meant getting up bright and early every single morning whether they wanted to or not.
Which meant that responsible adults never got to sleep in.
Which sucked, really, because he was dead before noon. Down by four, up by noon, and then he could greet the day. That was his preferred lifestyle but now, well, now he had actual work to do in his life that clashed with said lifestyle. He'd gone so long without having much of anything to do, well besides be Mob's friend and remember Suzuki's Netflix password for him, but now he had…well a lot to do. A hell of a lot to do. More than he had ever wanted to do in his life…
But he needed to get his ass out of bed and just…go to work like a responsible adult.
He was twenty now and he had to work. He was not fifteen….he hated those dreams…and he was not going to school. He was going to work at his job where he worked and earned money because he was a grown man now and that was what grown men did. They worked. He had always known, since he had been a kid, that he would have had to work somewhere when he grew up. He had never given much thought to what, it was exactly, that he was going to do with his life. He just knew, from a young age, that he would have had to do something.
He was doing something.
He had never seen himself as a cult member but…well he had never thought this far ahead before. That stupid kid that he had been, that stupid kid who's biggest problem was a stupid math test that he had been too stupid to study for…not that he even remembered what he had even gotten, hadn't given much of any thought to what he would do. He had always just had this vague idea that he would have a job…a vague concept…wait, now, not true. He had wanted to work at the used game store, actually, before all of this…but being Suzuki's friend and assistant was good too…well it was ok….sort of. It was a job that he had. It was a job that gave him a place to live and money to piss away on stuff he wanted but did not need…and also he got to spend the day hanging out with his…his best friend…
Suzuki Touichirou was his best friend.
Shibata was a good friend, and they used to hang out, but Suzuki…was Suzuki. Suzuki was kind of clingy and he was always up for hanging out…and that made them best friends. Besties. Heh. Like Mob and Minegishi only without the bracelets. Heh. At some point he had become best friends with Suzuki Touichirou of all people. The most powerful esper on Earth and the world's biggest weirdo, too. They were friends….best friends…well he wasn't entirely sure about that…
Since he couldn't even pinpoint the time when he had gone from the Minecraft guy to the Minecraft and conversation guy to the guy who Suzuki declared his friendship for on one of their plane rides to hell.
That was when Suzuki had come out and said it. He and Hatori were friends…and that had been a relationship upgrade…and he had no idea if they had gone from friends to best friends yet. Well it was up to Suzuki, he supposed, since Suzuki had been the one to declare them to be friends in the first place. Suzuki apparently thought that they were friends….and he had declared it…so therefore it would be on him to declare them to be best friends too…..and he didn't mind. Suzuki was ok, he was a decent friend, but also kind of a weird. Kind of a real weirdo…which would have gotten him killed if he had ever said it out loud….
So he wasn't going to tell Suzuki to his face that he thought that he was a weirdo.
Even though he, objectively, was. He was just….he drank ketchup. Suzuki had drank ketchup in front of him once, Hatori got the feeling that he should have been flattered that Suzuki had been comfortable enough around him that he would forget that he was there…but that had been just plain weird. Not the weirdest thing, though, that Suzuki had done. No, there was his relationship with Mob…and his lack of relationship with Sho…and, yeah, he was a weird guy and all…but there was more weirdness. There was always more weirdness when it came to Suzuki.
The shipping. That was the weirdest part.
He wondered if he had hit weirdness bedrock yet….but there would always be more. Though it was hard to think of anything weirder than…the shipping. Suzuki shipped him with Fukuda….and he could deal with that. He had to deal with that. Suzuki…well he had never come out and told Hatori that they were best friends now but…well the guy could be sort of clingy…and apparently he wished that they were the same age so they could have been friends from childhood. That was weirdly…well it was flattering but also kind of scary a little bit because this was Suzuki. He had shades of being a nice guy but he was still Suzuki. Also he speculated about what life would have been like if Hatori had been a girl….and he shipped the girl version of him with Fukuda….which was…well he felt sorry for the girl version of him but….
It was better than shipping him with Mob.
Seriously. What the fuck…now that was weird. That was…he would gladly have taken Suzuki's weirdness, the shipping and all, above Fukuda's weirdness any day of the week. Suzuki stared at you, he would ask you weird questions, and he would speculate about what life would have been like if you had been born a girl but at least he didn't ship you with his eleven year old daughter. In fact what he did was the direct opposite. He had told Hatori specifically not to get involved with Mob…because for some reason she thought that Mob had a crush on him….but still. Telling a guy, especially a grown man, to get the hell away from your daughter was normal. Taking him out to the desert to possibly kill him if he got involved with your daughter was normal.
Sitting on the information for God knew how long was not normal.
He was getting himself all worked up. He sat up and put his glasses on. Fukuda was gone, he was Fukuda, and yes Fukuda had accused him of messing around with an eleven year old girl but…well he needed to not get all worked up about this. It wasn't like he could do anything about this. He was not a fighter. He wanted to kick Fukuda's ass but…yeah. He was not a fighter and Fukuda could heal so….so really there was nothing that he could do.
Besides get out of bed.
He pulled his shirt down from where it had rolled up and swung his feet over the side of the bed. He stepped on….well a book. That was weird. Normally he step on crumbs…and he would totally vacuum one of these days. He needed to find space for everything that he had bought. He had gone kind of…overboard…but not as overboard as Mob. At least not on the first day….and he maybe shouldn't have bought so much…but he had other people to pack him up for moves now so it didn't matter. Though maybe he should have given more thought to space in this room…since he did technically share with Shibata…though he spent most nights on the couch. Still maybe he should have planned a little better….for space and stuff….
But then again they moved all the time so there was no point, really, in putting everything away because for all he knew he would be moving tomorrow.
"Hatori! Your breakfast is getting cold!" shouted Shibata. Hatori kicked a pile of books out of the way as he stood up. Shibata made breakfast. This was either going to be really good or really burnt. Hopefully it was one of those days when he made square pancakes. Those were pretty fucking great….and so were the waffles…but hopefully Shibata wasn't trying out a new recipe. It took a few tries for him to get something right…
But then again what was he complaining about? It wasn't like he could cook.
Breakfast by Shibata was better than breakfast from the Claw cafeteria. So, really, he had no right to complain. It wasn't like he knew anything at all about cooking. Mob could cook better than he could and she was only eleven. Even Shimazaki could cook. He liked to pretend that he couldn't be he did, actually, know how to make waffles and other shit for himself too. Hatori was the only one in the house who couldn't cook….but he was also the youngest….
But he wasn't a kid.
"And eaten!" said Shimazaki. Hatori groaned and looked around for a pair of pants. He needed pants and a sweater. After this he'd go to work with Shibata….and if Shimazaki ate all of his food then he would just eat something there. He had the whole office to himself, Fukuda was off doing Fukuda things, so Hatori could eat whatever the hell he wanted in the office…but he also really wanted to get to the kitchen table already. Shibata might have made pancakes…or waffles….or maybe poptarts again. Those were….well he'd get better. Sho had liked them and that was what mattered. The kid was so picky it was amazing that he and Mob were related. Mob was so much older than him, it felt like sometimes, even though it had only been a year. Poor kid. She'd had to grow up way too fast, in Hatori's opinion, not that he ever could voice that opinion.
Suzuki most likely would not have taken it well if Hatori were to suddenly start questioning his parenting.
"Shimazaki! You have pancakes right in front of you! Leave Hatori's food alone! He's very fragile!" said Shibata. Hatori groaned as he zipped his pants. He wasn't fragile. He may have been the youngest, and he didn't deal well with panic, but he wasn't fragile. He could take Shimazaki eating his breakfast. He wouldn't have liked it, he would have been pretty damn pissed off, but it wasn't like he was going to try and fight him or even tell him off. Shimazaki was….he was Shimazaki and Hatori knew that he didn't have a chance against him…or anyone….so the only thing that he could do was put up with him…
It got easier.
Without Sho around Shimazaki had mostly just left him alone. He had been sort of mopey, lately, as mopey as he was capable of being anyway. He had been all…well he had stopped bothering Hatori, mostly, so he wasn't going to look too deeply into how he had been. They weren't friends, not really, they were more like coworkers and roommates and former romantic rivals….well barely. Minegishi didn't like him, he was pretty sure that they were into Shimazaki, and he could respect that. He would respect that. He would respect that so much that he was never going to say a word about how he used to be into them. They had it going on. They had this sort of…he didn't even know what…to them and…and that was all over and done with and he wasn't even going to glance in their direction ever again. Ever.
Though that was kind of hard with the kitchen table only having four chairs.
"Morning everyone." Said Hatori as he entered the kitchen. Shibata handed him his plate with one hand and used the other one to slap Shimazaki away with a spatula. Shimazaki was just playing, if he wanted his food he would have had it, and he wished that Shimazaki would just play with someone else…but Sho was off doing Sho stuff so they wouldn't be able to just steal off of each other's plates like normal. He made a point to sit away from Shimazaki. He sat down on the counter and held his plate in his hands. Shibata shook his head but said nothing and passed him the syrup. He managed to get just enough out before it was snatched out of his hand.
And he said nothing.
He wasn't about to start shit with Shimazaki. He was bored, he was mopey, and if Sho didn't get back here soon Shimazaki would start to become completely insufferable. He wasn't going to say anything then or now. There was no point since Shimazaki, if anything, fed on attention. He fed on attention and also Hatori wasn't a fighter so…yeah…there was no point in fighting with him about anything let alone something as simple as syrup.
He had bigger things to worry about.
"Sugar is poison." Said Minegishi batting the syrup away and not looking up. They did that thing where they folded their pancakes into tacos and filled them with fruit. That looked good…but they had the fruit dish in front of them….and he knew not to get too close to them. They had mostly forgiven him, it seemed, for…well everything but they still didn't like him to get too close. Well him or anyone who wasn't Shimazaki. He was sitting beside them and waving a bottle of syrup in their face. If he had been anyone else he would have been dead, they had killed people for less after all, but instead of using any of the plants that crowded to kitchen to end the most annoying guy in the house they just rolled their eyes and sighed,
"But you love syrup, Toshi, I've seen you eat it." Said Shimazaki. Minegishi batted the syrup away, that was all. They didn't do any of the million and one other things that they were capable of doing to him…probably because they were…whatever they were. Friends with benefits, like Mob had said, though she really should not have known what that meant. She was just a kid. For her love should have still been true love's kiss and riding off into the sunset with Prince Charming or something. Not…all of that. She was just a kid…though Hatori knew what he had been like at that age….the internet was a mistake….but she was a girl and girls weren't like that…right?
Suddenly he wanted to delete everything from the internet that wasn't rated for general audiences….at least until the kids grew up.
Because he knew what he had been Googling when he had been eleven years old. Girls had become something other than those annoying people who wouldn't let them in their clubhouses and ran away when he got too close. He had been on the cusp of…well he didn't like to look back on his middle school self…and the internet…well maybe someone should have paid attention to what he had been getting up to on that internet….
Mob and Sho were good kids. They didn't even know about…stuff like that. They would be ok.
"Rarely." Said Minegishi with a roll of their eyes. He wondered if they ever got sore with all the rolling that they did…not that he spent a lot of time looking at their eyes. They did have pretty eyes but….but he wasn't going to sit around noticing people's eyes. Noticing their eyes…which were pretty. Not that he was into them or anything. They were just…them. He just didn't know a lot of…well people who had been born female…and that was it. That was all. He just didn't spend a lot of time with people who weren't men…not that he ever would since he had a lie to live now. Well that wouldn't be so bad…it wasn't like he had ever been out with a girl anyway….and after that disastrous party it wasn't like he would ever try again….which was for the best, it seemed. For himself and everyone else.
"I've seen you drink it." Said Shimazaki. He was smiling at Minegishi…and that was the second reason that he was going to drop the thing with Minegishi. Shimazaki was in love with them. Well he said that he loved them and he seemed serious about his feelings…and Hatori was not going to compete with him. Not after what he had done….well Hatori had been the one to do the drinking and take the…whatever it was…but Shimazaki….well he was terrifying….
Even with a bottle of syrup on his head.
"Never." Said Minegishi. They had left the bottle of syrup on his head…and he was trying to balance it up there…and it was just…well he was just…it was hard to reconcile the person he knew he was with…well the guy sitting there in nothing but gym shorts with a bottle of syrup on his head…and he just couldn't help it….
He laughed.
He hadn't meant to laugh. Shimazaki…well he was a coin flip. Every day it was like he flipped a coin and asked if he would be an asshole or a murderous asshole and the rest of the world held it's breath. Shimazaki didn't like him, he knew that Shimazaki didn't like him, and he knew that Shimazaki also probably didn't much care for being laughed at by someone he didn't like….
He had to tread carefully….or just…he wondered if he could make it to the bathroom…or the closet…or under his bed…
"What are you laughing at?" asked Minegishi. Hatori….he felt cold. He felt cold and tense. His eyes darted to the doorway…and also to under the table…and being under the table would have been stupid…and he could not be stupid right now. He had to be smart and he had to think up…he had to think of something….
"Nothing. Just…something I saw the President do once." Said Hatori with a shrug. He still had that cold, tense, feeling but he wasn't going to run. He forced himself to take a bite of pancake. He ate it with his hands Sho style. The kid liked to saturate his pancakes with syrup until they were falling apart and then he would fold them over and eat them like tacos…he wondered if Sho had been imitating Minegishi then…and it made sense to eat them this way. Especially since he was shaking a little. He had a tendency to run and hide…and he had to stop it. He was being….he was acting like a fragile child and…and he needed to be something other than what everyone else saw him as.
He was twenty years old. He was not a child.
"Yeah, how is President Suzuki doing? He still need that nightly blowjob to keep the nightmares away?" laughed Shimazaki. Minegishi didn't look up. They just flicked him on the arm. He let them. He actually smiled when he did that. Weird but…well not as weird as what went through his head! Suzuki was…well he wasn't like that. He wasn't into guys. Well Hatori…he didn't know what was up with Suzuki and Fukuda…but he knew that Suzuki didn't do that kind of thing with his underlings. He could have had someone for every day of the week but that was the only part of his life when he was a good guy…and Hatori was so grateful…
And now he was looking a little bit too deeply into how close Suzuki got to him sometimes.
"I'm trying to eat here." Said Minegishi with a shake of their head. Hatori looked down on his plate. He didn't want to get into this. Shimazaki had his ideas and Hatori had told him time and time again that Suzuki wasn't like that. He was a weirdly good guy when it came to not taking advantage of people, and it would have been since he was the guy with all the power, and also…well even if Suzuki was…not that there was anything wrong with that…then he could have done better than Hatori. He had Fukuda after all and that guy….well he took the term bro-mance to a whole new level.
"Yup. And so does Hatori. Every day-" said Shimazaki. This time he got a spatula to the head…well he would have if he hadn't had his barrier up. It bounced off his barrier and skittered across the table. Minegishi raised their plate as it went by.
"Ok, that's enough! Leave Hatori alone. The President isn't making him do any of that so just shut up. Don't upset him, he's very fragile." Said Shibata. He patted Hatori on the back and…and he knew that Shibata was just trying to help but…but he wasn't a child. He wasn't a kid. He was a grown man and…and he was not fragile.
"I'm not-" said Hatori. He loved Shibata, he really did, but he just…he wasn't even that much younger than Shibata. He was twenty, not two, and he just….he didn't mind being defended but…but also he just…didn't like to be called fragile.
"Ryou, shut up before he locks himself in the bathroom again. We only have one bathroom and I'd prefer to have access to it." Said Minegishi. Hatori…well he had been thinking about it before but…but it wasn't like he did that all that often. Just when it got to be too much, that was all. Sometimes he just had to get to where he knew that he was safe. Safe and alone….but it wasn't like he did that for every little thing!
"I'm not going to-" said Hatori. He was a grown man, not a scared child, and he didn't….well he didn't like it but also he had no idea how to convince everyone else that he…he shouldn't have had to convince everyone that he was a grown man! He was twenty years old! There'd been a birthday party with cake! Everyone had been there!
"We can just have Shibata drag him out like last time." Said Shimazaki with a shrug. Shibata…was a good guy. He hadn't dragged him out so much as made him feel safe enough to come out. He was a good friend like that. Not like Shimazaki….if they were even friends. Mob wanted them all to be friends but…well it was hard to be friends with a guy like Shimazaki. He acted like a ten year old a lot of the time, especially when he was with Sho the actual ten year old, but he couldn't help it. Between the drugs and his terrible life, Hatori had read his file it had been pretty terrible what had happened to him,
"He doesn't have to-" said Hatori. He didn't need to be dragged out of anywhere because he would not be hiding. He was…he was fine. He was fine and…and he was not a child. He was a grown man but everyone treated him like more of a child than the two actual children!
"Guys, come on. Shimazaki leave him alone. Me and him actually have to work today and he needs to be in on time to do…well I don't know what the President has him doing but I know that he isn't making him-" said Shibata. He was always trying to be the peacekeeper….and he didn't have to be. He didn't have to be because…well now Hatori felt like shit. Shibata hadn't even had anything to eat yet and…well they didn't even have a lot of time since Suzuki liked to start the day early regardless of how late he ended up going to bed….and Shibata shouldn't have had to deal with this. Hatori should have been able to handle himself…but he couldn't…and he sucked for that.
"You can tell us what's really going on, we're adults here. We can handle this in an adult manner." Said Shimazaki. Hatori…if he had been more powerful then he would have at least hit Shimazaki. Blind or not he would have hit him. He was an asshole. He'd had a terrible life and doing as many drugs as he had done couldn't have been good for his brain….but he was still an asshole. He could sense everything around him. He knew that nothing was happening between him and Suzuki. He just liked stirring shit for the sake of it…and Hatori…he should have done something to just…shut him up already.
"Nothing is-" said Hatori. He couldn't do anything but talk…so that was what he did. What he tried to do at least.
"Nothing is happening between him and the President now let him eat his breakfast. He gets upset when he misses breakfast." Said Shibata. He patted him on the back again and…and he just….he was trying to be nice. He was trying to be a good friend and…and Hatori should not have been pissed off…and he had to stop it…
He tried.
"Hey! I am not….not doing anything like that with Suzuki! I mean-" said Hatori. He needed to stay calm. He needed to just…just let this all run off like water. Mom had told him that back when the other kids had made fun of him. He had to just let it all run off like rainwater….but it was hard. It had been hard when he had been fifteen and it was hard now at twenty….but he had to…to at least defend himself. He was not fragile.
"Just Suzuki?" asked Shimazaki. He raised an eyebrow and stuffed a forkful of pancake in his mouth. Crap. Right. He was President Suzuki. He was President Suzuki to him, not Suzuki, because they weren't that close…well they weren't supposed to be. They weren't even supposed to be friends and…well they were but…but they were not that close. Not close enough for him to be Suzuki…or Touichirou like Fukuda was, apparently, allowed to call him…and Hatori didn't want to call him that…and he didn't want to be close enough to call him Suzuki either…maybe. He didn't know.
"President Suzuki. He doesn't…he's not like that! So just stop-" said Hatori. He choked on his words. He wasn't that close to Suzuki and if Shimazaki thought that he was then he was never going to shut up. He wasn't going to shut up about this and then for the rest of their lives they just…they were going to be working together for the foreseeable future…and that meant that if Shimazaki didn't come off of this then he would be listening to this for the foreseeable future…and he was only twenty. That was going to be a long future indeed….wonderful….just wonderful….
"Ryou, leave him alone. I'm getting a headache from all of this." said Minegishi rubbing their temples. Immediately Shimazaki's face softened. He swallowed the bite of pancake in his mouth and leaned in close. He kissed them on the head. They wiped their forehead and smiled even though they still had plenty of syrup on their head.
"Sorry Toshi. Forgive me?" asked Shimazaki. He kissed them on the forehead again. Minegishi pushed him away…but they didn't mean it. If they had meant it then Shimazaki would have been tossed across the room. Instead he just sat down in his seat like a normal person and not…himself.
"Fine. If you shut up." Said Minegishi shaking their head. He smiled again and took their hand. They looked kind of cute, there, like a couple. Not that Hatori would have known about that. He had never…and he never would be in a relationship…but that was ok. He had made his peace with this. Girls had never liked him…and it wasn't like he was ever going to meet any…and that was ok.
"Can do. Love you Toshi." Said Shimazaki. He took their hand in his and kissed it. They…Hatori had never seen their aura like that before…and he had never seen them smile like that before…or at all. It was a little smile and…and that was more than any other smile that he had ever seen them give Shimazaki…or anyone. They were kind of pretty when they smiled…not that he cared. Well he did but it didn't matter. That ship had sunk.
"I love you too, Ryou." Said Minegishi. They were making it a point not to look at anyone. They were back to eating their pancakes. They put more fruit in the middle and ate it like a taco. They didn't look at Shimazaki who looked like Christmas had just come early or at him and Shibata who were exchanging looks. Hatori knew that he was confused, since Minegishi had never once even looked like they had even wanted to say it back, but Shibata…well he looked like he had found a baby in a basket on their doorstep.
"You two are-" said Shibata. He clapped his hands together and…and Hatori had never heard anyone's voice get that high…and if this had been an anime then his eyes would have been hearts.
"None of your business. Either of yours. Now eat your breakfast and then go and do whatever it is that you do during the day….and Ryou you had better shut up about Hatori and the President. You know for a fact that nothing besides a whole lot of nerding out is happening between them." Said Minegishi. Well they certainly could change the subject with tact and grace….and he got why they did it but he didn't want to get back to what it was that had led them to this in the first place.
"Fine, I'll shut up about Hatori and his new best friend." Said Shimazaki. With a shrug before he picked up the bottle of syrup and poured it down his throat Sho style. Hatori expected Shibata to come over and snatch the bottle away like he always did…but instead he turned away from the stove and faced Hatori. He could see his aura. He was….hurt? Why? Hatori hadn't done anything to him…he hadn't even said anything about how these pancakes were kind of chunky for some reason. Was he mad about how Hatori had told him not to defend him? Well he hadn't been an asshole about it? Had he? Great. Now he had something else to be worried about.
"The President…is your best friend?" asked Shibata. What? Was he bothered by…well that would have made sense. Him being upset…but it wasn't like he was about to replace Shibata with Suzuki. Shibata was a nice guy all the time, not some of the time, and…yeah. There was no replacing Shibata.
"No…I think that Fukuda is still his best friend. We're friends, though, he said….and he likes me enough to drink ketchup in front of me…but I'm not sleeping with him! So shut up! Shimazaki And I'm not fragile! And I am not a child! And-" said Hatori. Well he had gone off the rails towards the end…but at least he had gotten all of that out of his system…and that was good…right? It was good to get things out in the open and…well now he was being stared at.
"So Mob wasn't exaggerating. He really does drink ketchup." Said Minegishi before grabbing more fruit. They finished it off and…well he would have wanted some…but he would consider that to be payment for changing the subject again.
"…that's not right." Said Shibata sticking out his tongue. Hatori…well he was with him…but it wasn't like Suzuki did it that often. He had just forgotten that Hatori had been there. Besides, everyone did gross stuff when they thought that no one was looking. Hatori had seen Shibata licking the beaters from time to time, Minegishi bit their nails and chewed on them, and Shimazaki….well the less said about him the better. Suzuki wasn't that weird. This was Claw, being weird was a requirement.
"Yeah…well he only did it in front of me once…and I think that he forgot that I was there. It was like three in the morning." Said Hatori. He was defending Suzuki…well he would have defended any of his friends. So he did something embarrassing…he couldn't help it. He just…was a weird guy but…well people who lived in glass houses shouldn't go around throwing stones. They were all weird here.
"Our leader everyone." Said Minegishi sarcastically.
"Should…we be doing that? I mean he's a powerful esper….so maybe we should…but that's disgusting…" said Shibata with a shake of his head. Well, ok, it was gross but also it was probably just a thing with his personality and not the source of his power or anything like that.
"So…ketchup drinking party?" asked Shimazaki. He teleported over to the fridge and pulled out the ketchup. Minegishi leaned back and shoved the fridge shut.
"You idiots have fun with that." Said Minegishi
"Syrup drinking party?" asked Shimazaki after teleporting back to the table and picking up the syrup. He looked way too enthusiastic. He also seemed way too serious about this….and maybe he was…but it was hard to tell with him.
"Well that's a hell of a lot less weird than drinking ketchup…and I can't believe he does that…and now I can't un-know this about the President." Said Shibata. Hatori didn't get what everyone was so weirded out about. Suzuki was a weird guy. That wasn't news. Besides, they had weirder guys to deal with. Hell, everyone in that room was just as weird if not weirder! And not to mention Fukuda….
"I don't know what you're so shocked. He's a weird guy, we all know it." Said Minegishi. He wondered if they could read minds. If they could then…well he needed to find a better hiding spot than the bathroom. Or maybe they were just really in synch mentally…not that they were or anything like that. They had found happiness and love and whatever and he was happy for them.
"He's really not that weird. I mean…he's kind of an asshole and he lives on eggs and ketchup….and he's kind of a bad father…and sort of obsessive…but he's not that weird of a guy. I think he's got a personality disorder or something, really." Said Hatori. Suzuki…well they were friends and friends defended each other. Suzuki had defended him from Fukuda when he had accused him of messing around with Mob so he owed him one. Well he had been all 'he's gay and my daughter is the one with the crush on him' but that was still more defending than Hatori had ever expected to get from him. He hadn't had to defend him, he could have just sat there and ignored everything like normal, or even worse he could have sided with his best friend…but he hadn't. He had defended Hatori….and that was…well he was a pretty good friend. Huh. Well what do you know?
"That doesn't excuse the way he treats his kids…or everyone else, really." Said Minegishi. They had a point, there, Suzuki could be a good guy…but, yeah, he was an asshole. He was an asshole to his kids and everyone else and…and yeah. As good of a friend as he could be he was an asshole plain and simple.
"But if there's something wrong with him…I mean that's why we let Shimazaki get away with what he does. There's something wrong with him and he can't help it." Said Shibata with a shrug. Hatori just went back to eating. He had no idea where he stood on this so he decided to stay out of it. Suzuki had something up with him. It might have had something to do with being so powerful…since Mob had it too but to a much lesser extent….or maybe it was something genetic…since Mob also had it….sort of. The flat way of talking, mostly, but Mob was a hell of a lot nicer than her dad…and it might have been a powers thing since Sho was…well he had his problems but he was a pretty normal kid…but he didn't know.
"There's nothing wrong with-" said Shimazaki. Minegishi shook their head and put their hand on Shimazaki's arm.
"All of you let Ryou get away with too much. He's got his own internal problems….that nobody in this room should ever ask him about for any reason…but he should still be held accountable for the shit he pulls just like Suzuki should have been held accountable for the shit he started pulling when he was a kid. Then, maybe, the world wouldn't have to deal with him as he is now." Said Minegishi
"Yeah, and I thought MY parents made some big mistakes." Said Shimazaki
"He's not that bad. I mean…he kind of is but…but at least he's not Fukuda. Imagine if that guy was the President." Said Hatori. He knew that Suzuki was an asshole but…well they were still friends and…and well he had no idea what Suzuki's parents had been like so…so if they were going to make fun of him then they should make fun of him for things they knew…or whatever. He didn't know. What he did know was that there was someone a thousand times worse than Suzuki so…yeah. Maybe they should have just laid off of him.
"Don't even mention that glass dildo. Really. I am this close to killing him. This close." Said Minegishi. They held their fingers so close together that there was less than a centimeter of space between them…and Hatori didn't doubt for one second that they were anything other than completely serious.
"I don't blame you." Said Hatori. He would have done the same…if he could. But he didn't have it in him.
"Why would anyone ever want a glass…yeah? Wouldn't it shatter? Why would anyway want that?" asked Shibata scratching his head.
"I think that's that point. Nobody would want a glass one." said Hatori. He was not going to think of….any of that. Anything dildo related because he was in the kitchen sitting on the counter with his coworkers eating breakfast and…and he did not want to think of one particular coworker/roommate in that….state of affairs.
"Oh…ok. Now I get it." Said Shibata. He put his hand in front of his mouth and laughed. Hatori doubted that his mind had gone to any of the places that his mind was going.
"Don't call him a dildo, that's an insult to dildos, and dildos are fun even the ones made of glass. He's more like…lube. But expired lube. Expired flavored lube. Like….he's useful in that he keeps us from dying but….also he's irritating and useless and I hate him." said Shimazaki. He shifted in his seat as he spoke and….and Hatori did not want to ask where that weirdly specific example had come from.
"Clever. Did it take you a while to come up with that, Ryou?" Said Minegishi. They kicked him, lightly, under the table…and now he really didn't want to think about…anything. Shimazaki could read people's bodies and movements and he knew that he would not have taken it well if he knew what Hatori was thinking about…who he was thinking about.
"No, I just found a bottle of expired flavored lube in my coat pocket." Said Shimazaki with a shrug. Hatori wanted them to stop talking about sex, mostly because he had to work with these people, he had nothing against sex just…he did not want to contemplate his coworkers/roommates in that…way. For different reasons.
"How do you know it's expired?" asked Shibata. Hatori shook his head. Don't ask him…you don't want details. Nobody wants details.
"Do you really want to go digging around in Ryou's sex life? Because if you do I guarantee that you're going to find a lot of things that you never wanted to know about." Said Minegishi. They got it. He wondered if they could read minds…but if they could then he would have been a dead man because now his mind was on them and…and yeah. He was…not into them but…well they had it going on. Even in an oversized Sailor Moon t-shirt and purple pajama pants they had it going on….and he as a healthy person…so he could think about them…but not now because Shimazaki would kill him! The two of them had, apparently, upgraded their relationship…but that was ok. There hadn't been any hope for him and Minegishi anyway. Not after the idiot he had made out of himself.
"I….am afraid to at this point." Said Shibata. Good. That was a good way to feel.
"There's nothing wrong with my sex life. Ask me whatever you want." Said Shimazaki. Hatori prayed to whatever God was listening that nobody asked Shimazaki anything and that they all went back to eating or talking about whatever it was that they had been talking about before they had gotten to the subject of Shimazaki's sex life.
"Uh-huh…so why can't you go back to your family?" asked Minegishi. Hatori shook his head. He knew the story behind that. He had access to all of Claw's files. He knew that story and…yeah. There was a lot in there that nobody needed to know about….or admit that they knew about. This was Claw, almost everyone had a past, and almost everyone knew never to ask about anyone's past.
"A lot of reasons. Let some people die, did a lot of drugs, set some stuff on fire on accident, stuck my dick a few places where it was wanted, very much wanted, and-" said Shimazaki
"So, yeah, nobody dig into that area." Said Minegishi
"Hey, I have zero shame. Shame is boring and I don't have time for that shit." Said Shimazaki
"A little shame can be good for you." Said Shibata with a shake of his head. He was wasting his time. Trying to get Shimazaki to feel shame was like trying to get Suzuki to eat sugar. Not going to happen.
"Nope. I've done some fucked up shit but, hey, I own up to it at least. The shit that I should own up to. I am who I am. I'm Shimazaki Ryou, I do fucked up shit, any questions?" asked Shimazaki
"We all do fucked up shit and, unlike some glass dildos, we admit to it…fucking Fukuda….sorry. He just gets me so…God! Just…I have no idea why Suzuki keeps him around! The way he treats Mob…I'm glad she told him off." Said Minegishi. They were…Hatori wasn't good at reading auras but he could feel their aura in the plants around him. The kitchen was full of them and…and Fukuda should have been glad that he wasn't there. Minegishi cared a lot about Mob, like she was their own kid maybe, and Hatori was amazed that Fukuda hadn't been maimed or impaled by vines yet.
"She told him off? Mob? The Mob who lives next door?" asked Shibata. He pointed out the window at the Suzuki house just in case anyone knew any other people named Mob.
"Yeah, I was there. She….well she can be scary when she wants to be. She actually stopped me from teleporting. She just…stopped me. She was pissed at me for fucking with Fukuda and she was pissed at Fukuda for telling their dad about Sho's girlfriend and…yeah. She can be pretty fucking terrifying when she wants to be." Said Shimazaki
"Not that it helped. That piece of shit…you know why she's wearing that sweater in the middle of summer, right?" asked Minegishi. They looked like they were about to pick up their fork and start stabbing tables or walls or….well people. They were surrounded by plants but he did not like the way that they were grasping that butter knife.
"Because I made it with love." Said Shibata simply.
"No…well yes….but she's wearing it because that bottle of salted hand sanitizer apparently has nothing better to do than make her feel self-conscious about her body. Apparently he had this idea in his mind that she was seeing Ryou-" said Minegishi
"She's too young for me! Just putting it out there that Mob is way too young for me. Maybe in two or three years but not now." Said Shimazaki. Hatori wanted to tell him that saying that was kind of suspicious, that he had to clarify that she was too young for him, because that should have gone without saying. Then he had to come out with the two or three years thing and…..and Hatori was not going to go digging into that. He was just going to pretend that Shimazaki had been kidding or stirring the shit like he loved to do.
"But…then she'll be thirteen or fourteen…." Said Shibata. He looked like he was about to kill someone…and Shimazaki was going to be that someone….and it was way too early for a fight. Well there was no good time for a fight but, yeah, mornings were the worst…and he could feel...well it felt like his body was getting ready to run before his brain had even thought of it.
"Like I said before, don't go digging around in that area of Ryou's life." Said Minegishi. They glared at Shibata…and Hatori…well he wasn't going to get involved in that. If Minegishi told you that you didn't want to know then, yeah, you probably didn't want to know. They had their own stuff in their past so, yeah, maybe listen to them.
"But….you slept with…someone that young? I mean…when you were thirteen or fourteen….right?" asked Shibata. Hatori shook his head. If you had to ask then you didn't want to know the answer.
"The age of consent is-" said Shimazaki. Hatori shook his head. Nope. They were not getting into that. That was not a conversation that would end well for any of them. That would start a fight…one that he might have participated in…and it wasn't even seven in the morning. They were just….it was not the time for this. It was never the time for this. They had to get along. They had to live and work together so, yeah, maybe they should talk about literally anything else.
"Don't ask questions to which you don't want to know the answers. It's not a difficult concept to grasp." Said Minegishi rolling their eyes again. Hatori wondered, well he wanted to ask, how they could love someone like Shimazaki. Someone who had done the things that he had done. He had killed a lot of people, among other things, but Minegishi…well they had done a lot of shit too so…maybe that was what had brought them together? He didn't know, he just knew that it wasn't any of his business.
"I have never in my life fucked a kid, though, and I never will and Fukuda…well he's lucky that he's not a red smear on the pavement right now." Said Shimazaki. He sounded legitimately angry and…and Hatori scooted back on the counter until his back was against the wall. He was somehow even more terrifying when he was serious. When he was being unpredictable he was scary but angry…angry was somehow even more…terrifying.
"He accused you too? I mean….you remember what happened on that last plane ride. You guys were there. How he just….accused me of going out with Mob….like he was trying to get me in trouble…I mean he should have, Mob's only eleven, but just…if he thought that I was going out with Mob then he should have kicked my ass and told Suzuki right when he suspect not…sat on it until the perfect time when he could hurt me. I don't know, I really hate that guy." Said Hatori
"Don't worry. He's gone now….well I mean he's probably coming back but he's mostly gone." Said Shibata. He didn't sound too happy…and Hatori didn't blame him. Fukuda would be back and then the kids would have to deal with him and…and there was only so much that they could do for those kids.
"He took Sho with him though….and I mean Sho's really accident prone but…I don't know. I don't feel good about leaving either of those kids alone with him. He's just….I really hate him." said Hatori. He didn't know how else to say it…and he didn't even know if it was ok to be saying it. He hated Fukuda. He hated that guy for making the kids feel like shit and being weird to them…but he was still Suzuki's best friend and as nice as he could be he still stuck people in holes for the slightest reasons…but still. He could hate who he wanted to hate and….and he had never hated anyone before but…well he hated Fukuda.
"We all do. The only person who likes him his Suzuki…I mean as much as that guy can like anyone. I don't know why he puts up with him. I mean I hang around Suzuki more than you do and Fukuda is weirdly….clingy, I guess. Like whenever you're hanging out with him I set a timer for ten minutes and always before it goes off he's always there. It's weird." Said Shibata
"Maybe they're secret lovers." Said Minegishi sarcastically.
"No, they've just been together for a long time and Fukuda…well I guess it would make sense for him to be jealous but….I don't know why he has to be so weird about it. He's just a weird guy….like….I don't know. It worries me that Sho's alone with him. I mean he's accused two people now of messing around with the kids…and he just…well he was weirdly ok with the idea that Mob and I had not only gone out but broken up and…..yeah." said Hatori
"Well now I feel gross….and we don't have time to shower because the President usually leaves home around now. Come on, Hatori, before he gets upset at us for being late." Said Shibata. He patted Hatori on the back. He hopped off of the counter and dropped his plate in the sink. Right. Work time. They could revisit this conversation again later…hopefully not anytime soon…but right now he had to get to work and just….get through this day. It wouldn't be so bad, he wouldn't have to deal with Fukuda, but….well he'd come back and then…well there was only so much he could do for those kids…
But they had other people looking out for them, too, so maybe they would be ok and if not…well then Hatori would have one more reason not to want to get up in the morning.