Author's Note: Here it is, my first drop in over a year! I'm using this as a warmup before I continue on ITIKY, so enjoy!
Moxxie raced down the street, glancing at the passing faces of the crowd around him. He was growing frantic, heart beating like a drum in his chest.
Where in heavens had he gone?
The agency had a job to get to over two hours ago, and Blitzo never showed up. Luckily it hadn't been anything too complicated, Millie and Moxxie had been able to handle it on their own easily enough, but that wasn't the point. Granted, Blitzo being late or absent wasn't all that unusual, in fact it happened all the time, but he normally at least answered his phone or posted to his Voxtagram. However, all they had gotten from him this time was radio silence. Even Loona's calls had gone unanswered, which was concerning to say the least. That was why, after they had completed their job, Moxxie had decided to go looking for him. That was over an hour ago and so far his efforts had proven fruitless. He wasn't at any of his usual hangouts, and the more Moxxie looked the more he began to panic.
But he wasn't worried, no. He definitely wasn't thinking of what happened the last time Blitzo had gone off the radar. He wasn't thinking of his boss tied up somewhere, probably hurt and alone with no chance of anyone ever finding him. He wasn't thinking of never seeing Blitzo again, of all the regrets he'd have, of-
"AHH!"
The sharp cry stopped Moxxie in his tracks. He looked over to find the source, spotting an imp sitting at a cafe across the street. He was clutching his hand close to his chest, mumbling curses to himself and glancing up at the sky, almost as if he was looking for something. Huh, that was odd. A soft ping above him caught his attention, pulling his gaze upwards just in time to catch what looked like a small rock bouncing off the street lamp next to him and hurtling across the street, landing in some poor woman's salad.
What in Satan's name?
He squinted at the pole, making a mental note of the trajectory. If it hit the light at that angle and travelled that way, then deducing the source wouldn't be difficult. He considered a moment, creating a mental line and following it to a building near the end of the block. He trotted closer, peering up at the roof. Sure enough, for a split second, a figure popped up over the edge and threw a rock at the street lamp. It hit it with another sharp ping, bouncing off and flying across the street. Who was doing this? Who was so demented that they spent their free time throwing rocks at random civilians? Even Blitzo wouldn't-
A loud yelp and a crash interrupted his thoughts. Moxxie looked over, spotting a waiter holding his head, a tray of food and broken dishes scattered on the ground in front of him. He then heard a soft snicker from the roof, so quiet he barely heard it.
"Fuckin' bullseye!"
Oh, that son of a bitch.
Moxxie let out a heavy sigh, his shoulders slumping. He stood corrected, only Blitzo would pull something like this. But if he thought he was getting away with it without any consequences, he had another thing coming. If there was one thing Moxxie was always prepared to dish out, it was a lecture. He took a deep breath to prepare himself, squared his shoulders, and straightened his bowtie. He could do this.
Luckily the building was both abandoned and not very tall. Getting in was easy, and the trip up the two flights of stairs was even easier. He pushed open the rooftop access door, not quite sure what he had been expecting to find. Even so, Blitzo picking through a pile of pebbles while surrounded by six separate cups of iced coffee, all at various levels of full, wasn't high on the list. A handful of poorly drawn horses on folded, propped up pieces of paper were scattered around him like some fucked up version of a support circle. Also, was it just Moxxie, or did one of the horses look like him? He squinted at them, glancing over each one. There was him, Millie, Loona, Blitzo's favorite barista from the coffee shop, Verosika (though, this one was upside down with an x over each eye), and a couple that vaguely looked like some of their past clients.
"Okay, Loony." Blitzo held up one of the rocks, looking it over. "I'm thinking we get the bitch with the tea cup next. Betcha I can add it in like a fucked up sugar cube."
The "Loona" horse, of course, did not respond.
Nonetheless, Blitzo rolled his eyes. "Without breaking it, fuck, I know. Damn it Moxxie get off my fuckin' dick."
Oh crumbs, this was it. Blitzo had finally snapped. "Uh, sir?"
Blitzo screeched, flailing a moment and sending the rock he was holding flying over the edge of the roof. "MOXXIE WHAT THE FUCK?!"
"Sir, the rock!" Moxxie reached out, as if he had any chance of catching it. He wasn't sure who or what was on the ground below, but the last thing he wanted was for someone to get hurt.
"Pull that stick outta your ass, Mox, it'll be-" There was a soft thud, followed by the sound of an infant screaming and a woman crying out in alarm. Blitzo glanced towards the edge and winced before shrugging and looking back to Moxxie, continuing his sentence. "-fine. It's fine, we're ignoring that. Now what the fuck are you doing here?"
"What am I- are you fucking kidding me?!" Moxxie narrowed his eyes, tail flicking in frustration. "Sir, we had a job to do two hours ago! What are you doing here?!"
Blitzo blinked, looking over at his pile of rocks and then back to Moxxie. "Is, uh, is that a trick question? Because I thought it was pretty fuckin' obvious. What, did'ja leave your noodle at home or, uh, what's goin' on here."
Moxxie let out a heavy sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. Killing his boss wasn't worth it, killing his boss wasn't worth it. "No, Blitz, I know what you're doing, I figured that much out. What I don't understand is why? Sir, even you have to admit this is downright unhinged! I mean, the horses, and that's, what, six cups of coffee? They don't even look like they're the same flavor!"
"No shit, Mox, I'm not gonna get six cups of the same iced coffee. I mean, how fucked up would that be?" Blitzo rolled his eyes at the very thought, picking up a caramel colored drink and taking a sip. He then put it down, picking up a pink one with his tail and taking a sip from that one as well. As soon as he did he scrunched up his features, pulling the straw from his lips and shooting the cup a glare. "You know, cotton candy flavor sounded great in theory, but it just tastes like ass. And not even like good ass, it's like, dirty ass."
Moxxie furrowed his brow. "There's good ass? Wait, no." He held his hands out in front of him, shaking his head. "No, no no, I'm not asking that. Look, Blitz, I don't know what all of, of," he waved his hands a bit in an all-encompassing gesture, "this is, but what I do know is that everyone is worried about you. Can we just go back to the office?"
Blitzo scoffed. "Fat chance, bitch. I still have like twenty-six dollars worth of coffee to drink, and that lady's teacup practically has a target painted on it. I'm not going anywhere."
"Can't you just bring your coffee with you and start trouble at home instead?" Moxxie pleaded.
"Sure can't," Blitzo said, going back to his rock pile.
"But why?" Moxxie asked, exasperated.
"I dunno, why do you have such a baby dick? Get off my fuckin' back." Blitzo picked through the rocks, tail flicking back and forth like an irritated cat.
Moxxie growled, feeling his frustration and anger come to a boil. First Blitzo barges in on his first anniversary date with Millie not even two nights prior, and now this? How could he just ignore everything important in his life, stringing everyone that cared for him along like a cat with a string? This was like a perfect picture of a mental breakdown, and-
Oh.
Moxxie looked at the "Verosika" horse, and then at the cafe across the street. Plastered on the brick was a poster of Fizzarolli, the very same Fizzarolli that had tormented both himself and Blitzo when he had taken Millie to Ozzie's.
Oh no.
And suddenly, Moxxie felt like an idiot. He should have realized it sooner, what all of this was. It looked like a mental breakdown because it was a mental breakdown. Blitzo wasn't going to come with him, not until he sorted out whatever it was that had led to this. He paused for a moment, considering his options, before walking over and taking a seat next to Blitzo.
Blitzo looked over at him, raising a brow. "Uh… what are you doing?"
"Helping." Moxxie dug through the rock pile, looking for one with the right shape for what he was planning.
"You, you're gonna help throw rocks at people." Blitzo looked skeptical, and rightfully so.
"No." Moxxie picked out a rock, small and round, but somewhat flat. "But I have better aim than you, and I bet I can knock that Fizzarolli poster off that cafe before you can."
"Oh like hell you can." Blitzo snatched a rock from the pile, breaking out into a devious grin. The change in mood was instantaneous, it was almost scary sometimes how quickly one could pull Blitzo from one to the other. "You are on, Mox."
That was one of the nice things about Blitzo, if Moxxie stopped to think about it. He was incredibly easy to distract. He rolled the rock over in his palm, considering how to plan his throw. "Are we still ricocheting off the light pole?"
"Is there any other way?" Blitzo picked up the pink coffee, holding it out to him. "Here, take a sip, for luck or something."
"What? Isn't that the one that you just said tastes like ass?" Moxxie wheeled his arm back, taking a deep breath before hurling the rock at the streetlamp. It ricocheted off, flying towards the poster and hitting the top corner at just the right angle to peel it away from the wall ever so slightly. "Why in heavens would I want to drink that? Why would you even offer?"
Blitzo shrugged, taking a sip from the cup and grimacing at the flavor. "What can I say? Misery loves company." He threw his rock, knocking a slight dent in Fizzarolli's face. He then picked up a cream-colored cup with black bits in it and took a sip. Probably cookies and cream.
Moxxie rolled his eyes, though he had a small, fond smile. "You're insane, sir."
"Hey, you're the dumbass that decided to work for me." Blitzo put down that cup, picking up one with a light brown coloring and another one that just looked like espresso on ice. He took a sip from both at once, tail curling a bit. "Oh yeah, that's the shit."
Moxxie just smiled and shook his head. Blitzo was right, this was a job he had decided to take. And, even though some days were better than others, it was a decision he wouldn't take back for anything.
Author's Note: That's all for now! Stay classy, y'all