Daughter had such soft hair.
He had never noticed, before, how soft her hair was. How it felt when it slipped through his fingers. Her hair was so long and thick and soft and…and he just could not get enough of this. He couldn't get enough of the feel of her hair, the softness of it, and he wanted nothing more than to sit there running his fingers through his hair for the entire day. For the entire week. For the entire month. For the entire year. He wanted to spend the rest of his life working his fingers through her hair…and being near her…she was just so…so soft and warm and…and just…
She was so perfect.
"You are so perfect. Your hair is so soft…how have I not noticed this before?" said Suzuki as he ran his hands through Daughter's hair. They were still in the living room, he had no idea how long they had been there for, and he didn't care. They had eaten lunch and now they were watching one of her movies, the one about the ice queen but it was a sequel…which was not even close to measuring up to the original, and he was just…so happy to be near her. He was just so happy in general. There was a light feeling…an unfettered sort of feeling…but also a foggy sort of feeling. Like….like deep thoughts were difficult right now…the future was difficult. The future had been this ever present…thing…which had weighed down on him for as long as he could remember….now it was just…lost in this fog…and he was lost in the fog…or maybe on top of the fog…since he felt so light…
So very light.
"I know, dad, you said that already." Said Mob as she forced everything to stay put where it was. Everything in the room, from the couch to the TV to the pencils that Sho left on the floor were trying to listen to dad and defy gravity…well now all that had to listen to her and defy dad. He was still so out of it….and she didn't know why. They had both smoked the same and she felt fine, kind of annoyed really, but he had been talking in circles and playing with her hair for the past two and a half movies. It didn't make any sense. They should have been on the same level but he was acting…well really stoned…and she was normal. He was older than her. She should have been the stoned one and then dad should have been the normal one…
Maybe his tolerance was just really bad.
That would have made the most sense. She loved her dad, she really did, but…well maybe she shouldn't have smoked him up. She hadn't thought that he would actually have taken her up on her offer. He hated smoking and stuff and she had thought that after she offered he would have wanted to go somewhere else…or something. He would have gone to work or to his room and left her alone to smoke and relax and deal with this annoying and gross thing that was happening to her. But no. He had decided to smoke, well she had asked him to, and then he had gotten so high that he was stoned and now not only did she have to deal with what was happening to her she had to deal with him now too.
Dad really needed to learn about moderation.
"Oh…well it's true. Your hair is long and soft and perfect and I love it. I love you. I love everything about you. Did you know that? I remember that you wanted me to tell you that. It's always been difficult for me. I try to speak as precisely as possible and love just does not encompass all that I feel for you. Have I told you that?" asked Suzuki. He can tell her anything. He knows that he can tell her anything. She will listen to anything he tell her. She will always be there and she will always listen. It's alright to tell her these things. She will not judge him. She will not tell him that he's being weak. She will not tell him that he's being ridiculous. She will not be anything other than there and soft and loving towards him…and he loved how loving she was…
He loved her.
He pulled her close and pressed his face against the top of her hair. She smelled…well she smelled vaguely of blackberries but also her shampoo…and also she was so soft and…and she should have smelled of cinnamon and artificial berries…but that was how Masami had smelled. She was not Masami. When he closed his eyes he almost expected to see Masami but when he opened them he expected to see Daughter.
Shigeko.
He could see her and feel her and…and this was so perfect and she was so perfect and…and he reached behind himself. He could feel a tag at the back of his neck even though this was a tagless undershirt. He specifically only wore tagless undershirts. He had gotten out of his button down, it had been driving him insane, and now the phantom tag of his undershirt was driving him insane, and he was insane because there was no tag. He was just…he didn't know. He got back to normal. He took his hand from the back of his neck and used it to pull Daughter close.
She was so warm and soft and small and perfect….and he loved her so much.
"Yes, dad, you told me that already. I remember. You told me ten minutes ago." Said Mob. She wanted to sigh and roll her eyes. She had never wanted to do that before. She had seen Minori do it, though, when her dad asked her to do stuff or not to do stuff…when she had told her dad that he was being annoying. Mob hadn't been able to understand it, then, why Minori would do that….but now she got it.
Dad was very annoying when he was stoned.
Or maybe he was just high, now, because it seemed like he was coming down. He had been very clingy and cuddly and smothery before but now…well now he was clingy and cuddly and smothery but he wasn't using her as a pillow…so that was good. He was just making knots in her hair and telling her how much he loved her and how soft her hair was…and she knew that he loved her and that he was just showing his love as best as he could…but this was still just…kind of annoying.
"Oh…well now I'm telling you again. I love you. I love you so much and I care for you and, really, caring for you is what it is…and you are so small….very small. You were very small when I met you, you know. You were so small that I could lift you…but now I cannot…because you're eleven now. You're eleven and very large…well eleven year old sized…but it's nice to see that you still like the ice queen. This is good." Said Suzuki. She was there and she was small and she was still his…and he had no idea what he had even been worried about. Of course she was stull his. She would always be his. There was a part of him, he supposed, that was completely insane. The part of him that looked at her and didn't see the Daughter that he had raised, the person he would spend his life with, but instead another person who would leave him. Another person who could have been plotting her escape right now. He would have had no way of knowing that she wanted to go, no way of looking into her mind and seeing her plans, and that…that part of him that thought that she even had those sorts of plans in the first place was completely insane.
She would never leave him.
She had said so. Masami….she had never promised that she would never go. That was just something that he had assumed came with the marriage. Marriage was a forever commitment. You met your most perfect person and built a life with them. You gave her a house and children and she took care of your house and your children and then that was it. That was marriage. Happily ever after like in one of Daughter's movies…but life and art were two separate universes. Wives could leave. His wife…she had left….and also he had been unfaithful towards her…but Daughter…she would never leave him and he would never be unfaithful towards her so the part of him that worried, the part of him that looked at her and saw someone else who could go, was insane.
So in order to be sane he had to ignore that part of himself. Simple.
"Thanks Dad, I care about you too…now come. Let's watch Frozen." Said Mob. She knew that he cared about her. He had been telling her over and over and over again that he cared about her…and that was all that she had wanted. All that she had wanted for so many years. She had felt, before, like he didn't love her or Sho. That he was just this mean sort of person who was also her dad and didn't even know how to say 'I love you' and stuff like that…so she should have been happy that he loved her. That he could say it. She should have been happy but also…also she just…sort of…loved her dad very much but also was very annoyed and…
And she just wanted to watch Frozen.
Her stomach hurt. It felt like, every so often, someone was poking her in the stomach with a fork. Like someone's hand was inside of her organs and was poking them with a fork…and then when he got bored of poking her inside the hand turned the fork around like it was whisking eggs…and also she felt gross. She was sitting in something that felt like a diaper full of her own blood and it was hot and gross and…and just annoying…and dad was making the whole thing even more annoying than it ever had to be. She loved him, she really did….
But also she just wanted to relax and watch Frozen and wait for her stupid period to just be over with already!
"When I rule the world I'm going to make a sequel for you." Said Suzuki. He nodded to himself as he twisted his fingers in her hair. He would make a sequel because this needed a sequel. This needed several sequels. How was the economy going to take the short ice age the queen had made? He'd imagined that all the crops and fish would have died….maybe an ice based economy? But that was a terrible idea. The entire economy could not rest on the shoulders of one person? Also how was the younger sister going to take this? Her sister had powers…but then again if one child had powers then usually most siblings also had powers….and also she must have had fire powers….or maybe life powers since she was related to the princess of Corona. The one with the very long hair which looked very soft and beautiful but also it was nothing like Daughter's hair. Her hair was so perfect and long and he could have spent the rest of his life sitting there weaving his fingers through her hair.
"Thanks dad, I would like that a lot….now come on. Let's watch." Said Mob. She didn't want to get into this part. Dad…well he liked Frozen. Stoned dad liked Frozen. Stoned dad also thought way too much. She knew what was coming next. Now she was going to have to listen to all of his ideas about Frozen and…and she loved her dad more than any other dad in the whole world….but also dad was just…he was kind of annoying right now…even though he was sharing in what she loved he still could be very annoying…especially when he was stoned.
"In this sequel the younger sister will have fire powers. That would make the most sense. The older sister has ice powers and usually powers come for both siblings, did you know that? If you have one child then the next one you have will have powers as well. We tend to make only children, that's the problem…but the birth rate here is very low. Did you know that?" asked Suzuki as he ran his fingers up and down through Daughter's hair. He wondered what her children would be like. Well they would take after her, obviously, and they would have powers…and he knew that he would love her children just as much as he loved her. They would be small and warm and soft like her and they would have powers and he would teach them how to control their powers just like he taught her
"Yes dad, you told me before. Japanese people aren't making enough babies." Said Mob. Dad had said…and said…and said that the country was underpopulated and that he couldn't understand why people weren't having big families. He said that he didn't understand why his parents only had one child and he didn't understand why mom had only wanted to have one child. Dad was really stoned if he was even forgetting how many kids he had…and Mob needed to teach him about moderation later, not now, now she just wanted him to…well she knew that she was being mean but she wanted dad to just be quiet for five minutes so she could hear the movie already!
"That's true….but espers especially. Have lots of children, Daughter, lots and lots of children. They'll all have powers. Like the ice queen and her sister. In the future I'll make you a sequel and in the sequel her sister will have fire powers. It just makes sense…or maybe life powers since the princess with the long hair has life powers…did I tell you that I think that they're related? Did I tell you that?" asked Suzuki. He wondered if she had noticed that detail. She probably did. She was so intelligent…and he loved that about her. She was so like Masami in that way…well she was not Masami's blood child but she was so like her…but also she was better because she would never leave him. She was not sitting there plotting her escape, no, she was sitting there happy to be with him because she loved him and he loved her and they loved each other and there was just so much love and trust and caring between them and…and he was a whole and complete person on his own…and he knew that she needed to learn to be independent but…but maybe they could be complete together…and independent together…..that would have been just wonderful…
"Yes dad…you told me that you saw Rapunzel and Flynn on their way to Else's coronation…and then you told me that they were related…and then you started playing with my hair. You told me already." Said Mob. She wanted to be like Sho and tell him to shut up….but that would have been wrong. She was not going to be mean to dad, first of all, because he was her dad and she loved him and she was the one who had gotten him stoned in the first place. She also was not going to tell him to shut up because, second of all, she had told Sho never to do that because it was mean and if she did things that she told Sho not to do then she would have been a bad big sister…and she was not a bad big sister. She was a good big sister and a good Daughter so she was going to be nice…even though she wanted to tell dad to get out of here so she could lay down and wait for this whole…period thing…to be over!
"Oh. Alright. Did I tell you that you have beautiful hair? And that it's incredibly soft?" asked Suzuki. Maybe he was repeating himself…he got the feeling that he was repeating himself…but these were the thoughts that he had managed to pull out of the fog of his mind. She had beautiful hair, he loved her, and there must have been a world of lore out there to explore in the ice queen mythos. He just…thoughts were a bit difficult….but he had trouble even worrying about that. How could he worry about anything when Shigeko was near?
"Yes dad, you've said that already…and you've been making knots in my hair, too, a lot of knots." Said Mob. Ok, now she had been a little bit mean there….but she was not in the mood to go around and around and around with dad like this in circles. She needed to smoke. She needed a drink. That was what she needed but she couldn't even have any of that because dad would want some too and then he would go back to being all clingy and smothery and cuddly…and she didn't want that….and he was coming down so it would have made no sense for him to get more stoned but….but she was tired and her stomach hurt and she felt gross and now there were knots in her hair!
And, really, the knots were the one step too far.
"I apologize. That wasn't my intention. You have such soft hair and-" said Suzuki. He tried to smooth out any knots that were there. He couldn't see any but this was not his hair. This was her hair and she had long hair because she was a woman and they had very long hair and Masami had always complained about knots, which was why he had stopped touching her hair, and it was such a gift to be able to touch Daughter's hair and he had ruined it and now she would want to go and…and he had no idea if he could handle that.
"Dad…do you want to brush my hair and not just play with it?" asked Mob. She could feel dad's aura…well she'd been feeling that aura for a while, and she loved him…and she had been mean to him. She had been mean to he own dad and…and she shouldn't have done that. Now he had to be nice to her dad, not mean to him, and…and if he wanted to play with her hair then he may have liked brushing it. She didn't much want to have her hair brushed right now but…well if he wanted to brush her hair and if it made him happy then she would let him brush her hair.
"Yes, yes, I can do that for you. I can anything for you. I love you so much and-" said Suzuki. He would do that for her. He was sorry and he would fix this and he didn't like getting direct orders from people, let alone his own Daughter, but he did like being told what to do….because then he wouldn't have to think. She wasn't cross with him…well she was….but he could fix it. He knew that she should have been the one who should have been worried about fixing things with him but…well that was the way it would have been if she had been anyone else…but she was not anyone else. She was his Daughter and he loved her and…and he would do whatever she asked of him.
Even brushing the knots out of her hair for her.
"Here. Start from the top and go to the bottom…um…a hundred times on each part…and you should count out loud so you don't lose track." Said Mob as she used her powers to get her hairbrush from the bathroom. She didn't usually brush her hair a hundred times on each side, she didn't really have time for all of that, but…well it would keep dad busy. Counting, too, would keep him busy. Busy and quiet. She loved her dad and she loved talking to him and having him love her but…well she also needed some peace and quiet. She felt sort of like Minegishi must have. She knew, now, why they spent so much time laying down on the couch watching TV and drinking and smoking. She knew what Minegishi went through and…well she also knew what they were so annoyed with everyone when they were like this.
Because, really, dad was being kind of sort of very annoying right now…and she needed a drink.
"Yes…yes….I can do that….one….two….three….four…." said Suzuki as he took her brush and he started running it through her hair. This was….this felt nice. He could sort of imagine how it felt…and it was nice. It was certainly nice to be able to just…brush her hair like this. This felt so nice and…and he had seen Masami doing this before. She used to brush out her hair every single night and every single morning. He had thought, before, that they entire process looked extremely tedious but…well now he realized how…how relaxing it was. How soothing. The repetitive motion of it…the repetitive motion and the counting and…and this was just…he sort of wished that he had hair long enough to brush…but his hair did not do this…
His hair stood up.
Mother used to brush his hair for him, too, when he had been smaller. His hair was like Son's, it wanted to stand straight up, and mother….well she hadn't let him but his hair down very short when he had been young. She had, instead, smoothed his hair down with a brush and some pomade when he had been small. She hadn't run the brush through his hair, no, she had used it to smooth his hair down so it laid down flat aside from the fringe…and he'd worn his hair like that until he had been old enough to have it cut down as short as it was not…and it had been so hard to find someone who even knew how to begin to cut his hair….God…he hated his hair so much….
But he loved his Daughter's hair more than anything else in the world.
"You know you really have beautiful hair and-" said Suzuki as he ran the brush through her hair. It was so long and black and it laid down so flat and it was so perfect and he hoped that she never cut it…because it was as perfect as she was…and there was no one more perfect in this world than her.
"Dad, you stopped counting." Said Mob as she felt the brush stop moving through her hair. Dad wasn't the best at brushing hair, he was taking the sections way too big, but at least he had been brushing and not talking. Now he was talking and not brushing again…and she just…she wanted to rest but…but he just wouldn't let her. Dad never talked this much…but stoned dad was not normal dad…and she should not have been complaining. This was her fault, she was the one who had smoked with him, and she was the one who had let him smoke that much in the first place. Obviously he didn't know anything about moderation.
"I apologize, I apologize….back to the beginning. One….another one makes two….two to the power of one makes two…any number raised to one equals itself…two to the second if four…." Said Suzuki as he worked. He worked and he counted and he counted as he worked. This was…this was good, very good. He liked numbers and he liked her and he liked….he liked this. This was such a simple task, such a repetitive task, and he knew that he should have been bored but…but he found himself enjoying this. He found himself enjoying sitting there brushing her hair and….and he just could not imagine anything better than this. Brushing her hair.
She had such soft hair.