Remembersees
Part Four
Speedy was a generous lover. At least Sakura believed so, not that she had any other experience to compare him to. Speedy seemed to know all the methods to make her feel adored. Sakura never asked Speedy about his patience and infinite care, but had she; he would have told her that his generosity was inspired by her. He had never been in love before, though he had taken partners and Sakura was not his reciprocal first.
Speedy cared about Sakura, enjoyed the blush that rose to her cheeks when he touched her. When he woke up, he hoped that Sakura would always been in his arms, he was the kind of man who was desperate for a woman's touch, specifically his woman's touch. Speedy didn't act to seduce Sakura, didn't think to lure her into his arms at night, but found nothing made him happier than to have her there, with her fingers laced with his, with her head on his chest while she slept.
Speedy would stay awake longer than Sakura knew, running his fingers through her hair while he thought about the universe. To Speedy it was a little grandiose to think that somehow his actions as a man, as a hero, as a lover, had some pull in the wake of the universe, but that was the way he was. The way he lived was large and was mostly due to the fact that as a younger man he couldn't. Sakura had let him piece together some of her past, how she was injured and that Sakura Chloe wasn't all there was to her real name: she had a secret identity, just like he did. Maybe that's why the feelings he felt for the half-Japanese heroine were so powerful: they were so much a like in how they were so bold and larger than life but still kept so many secrets.
She didn't know all the bad things he had witnessed before he became a Titan or how lucky he had been to stumble upon the Green Lantern. And if he had his way, she never would. The balance of their relationship lied in the fact that they knew little about each other: mystery attracted them both. She already knew his name, though she never thought to use it, and his eye color had taken her by surprise. What remained was his identity, that little part of himself that was his alone. He knew Sakura wouldn't pry, but he feared that one day he'd be vulnerable and let it slip out and then where would they be? He'd have nothing left to offer her and she was the kind to take everything he had to give… what would she take when my arsenal runs dry?
Sakura and Speedy spared in a noise pollution of their own design. Sakura breathed heavily and heaved her weapon to slice through the air with a sigh. Speedy leaped and bounded, his boots clicking against the floor. Each draw of a bolt clipped the air, sending a tiny spark of noise into the room.
Speedy's body danced to dodge her attacks, moving up and away, stringing bolts mechanically, his natural talent escaped from the tips of his fingers to soar through the air like a dashing wolf. He took excitement from watching Sakura parry and push, her eyes narrowed and focused, her fists balled tightly, always on the balls of her feet. Speedy could watch her move all day. His fingers flexed, unleashing his skill, pushing Sakura left, back and right; the way her hair fell in her eyes, the way her chest rose when she pushed forward, the way she licked her lips right before she punched him in his side…
Speedy faltered, taking the blow at nearly full force. He was lucky she was having as much fun as he was, a full force attack would have shattered at least one rib. Speedy leaped back stiffly to avoid more strikes, as her movements dropped sweat along her cheek, Speedy watched her still amazed after all the time he had known her how powerful her body was. It was a combination of her training and her Holy power, her amazing gift kept her body fighting, kept pushing Speedy into a corner, kept him pinned there when she stepped into his range.
It was a quick shot and risky, but it worked. Right when Sakura was within arms length, before she could raise a knee to his stomach, Speedy spun his bow, swinging over the younger girl's head. She seemed to catch his intent and dropped quickly onto her back, pulling Speedy forward. Speedy lost his balance and was laid out in a perfect sacrifice back throw, sailing over Sakura's head clumsily. Speedy recovered to his knee, a bolt strong tightly, unleashed too late when Sakura landed a sliding kick, taking out his base. The blow stopped short, leaving Sakura pinned slightly under the taller Speedy's body.
The two rolled against each other, their fingers gripping fiercely as they grappled for dominance. Eventually the struggle brought them to their feet. Sakura's eyes darted over Speedy's face from his masked eyes to his lips. Speedy's eyes found her lips, but caught her smirk too late. In a move he hadn't expected, Sakura leaned forward and kissed him swiftly on the mouth. Speedy's eyes widened, loosening his grip just enough for Sakura free her fingers, pulling from his hands to his shoulders. Speedy didn't have enough time to defend when Sakura raised both of her boots and planted them into his chest. She somersaulted while his body soared backwards. The red clad Titan slid across the floor. His body stopped, scrapping briefly against the arch of his bow. He pulled himself up and dusted off his shoulder.
"That was dirty." Speedy said, drawing back a bolt.
"But it was fun." Sakura blew him a kiss. Speedy smirked and the two continued their mad dance. They would find themselves again, caught in a deadlock, her smaller fingers locked over his as he gripped his bow.
"We could do this all day. Give in." Sakura grunted as she pushed Speedy's hands back towards his chest. Speedy grunted in response.
"But that would be boring. Neh koibito?" Speedy asked. His smiled took over his entire face when Sakura's eyes widened in shock. It was a quick pivot of his waist and wrists that spun the bow in his grasp and by association turned Sakura around, pinning the girl's back to his chest with his bow locked under her breast.
"Who taught you that phrase?" Sakura asked, panting slightly both from the excursion and Speedy's breath on her neck.
"Wouldn't you like to know?" Speedy pulled his weapon tighter against Sakura's body. "I win."
Sakura shook her head. "I don't think so."
Speedy didn't know what she planned to do to escape and never found out. Just as Sakura set her feet for her counter, an obnoxious crash echoed down the hall, bombarding into the training room. Speedy relaxed his grasp and Sakura stepped out of his embrace, their training completely forgotten. Without a word, the pair made their way to the entrance hall.
Starfire hesitated in answering D'ucel's question. She found herself in a situation she had never considered, never even believed possible: belief would require some sort of acknowledgement of potential… for which Star had none. The pretty Tameranian hadn't seen D'ucel in nearly eighteen half-years. Then she had been just a small girl of seven whole years and Blackfire was twenty four Blaxrigs,¹ just at the age of engagement. The year of Blackfire's arrangement for marriage had been one fraught with much distress. Tameran's champion Foxfire was near the center.
Starfire turned to the blue eyed fighter who stood anxiously waiting for her answer. Starfire couldn't open her mouth, had nowhere to begin with all the terrible things she had to say. She could see how his eyes waved, she knew from memory that he could feel her distress. It confused him; he knew that if it were tragedy she would have spoken already, even if unable to complete her sentence. But his princess had said nothing, leaving them both in a terrible stand still: the pain in his heart grew the longer he looked into her eyes. When she looked away he gained some relief, but only for a moment.
Beast Boy collapsed, the only person able to take his eyes off of the platinum blonde Tameranian. He huffed pitifully, wallowing in a pile of shredded mail. As bad as whatever it was that was happening over his head, what was happening in his heart was more terrible. It was fear; fear that he didn't know he could feel. His mother hadn't failed once in the years that he had been with the Titans to write him a letter. Even when she had broken her hand while dashing through the jungles of the Congo in search of her latest study, she had put a pencil between her teeth and scribbled out a letter for him; it had been short and sloppy: I miss you, I love you, I'm okay.
But that letter wasn't there. There was nothing. The normally cheerful changeling couldn't force a smile in that moment; he hadn't been this scared in a long time.
The shadow that fell over the green teenager matched his mood. Aqualad and Blackfire stared down at the hunched over animorph wondering why he was laying his face in what looked to be the day's mail. Aqualad shrugged and wrapped his arm gently around Blackfire's waist. He felt a tiny spark when his gloved hand met the armor platting of her garb. It felt like a warning, some sort of backlash. It stung slightly, but he didn't pull away. Instead he looked forward and met eyes with the new arrival.
Starfire watched D'ucel's eyes move from her face to something happening quietly behind her back. Starfire felt more than saw the excitement in D'ucel's eyes. As a hero of Tameran, whose people's powers were governed by emotion, D'ucel's heightened emotional abundance had led him to conquer more foes in the name of Tameran than any Grand Ruler or warrior before him. His emotions streamed from him like stampeding feet of Virluvian fortnorbs. It was a gift most Tameranians desired.
In battle it made him sensitive to the intentions of enemies. Often it would lead to his victory…
Starfire turned her head sadly to watch D'ucel move around her to engage Blackfire. No one was close enough to see that sadness there. D'ucel felt it for an instant, she could see from the way his steps were uneven for just a moment.
At this moment… I fear his emotions will lead to defeat…
The scene unfolded without words almost. D'ucel approached Komand'r, ignoring all the world around him. He ignored the hands and eyes of others; all he could see was long black hair and eyes the blue of the Tameranian holy waters: eyes of the greatest Grand Ruler, eyes of legacy. D'ucel moved quickly, standing in front of Komand'r: taking in the curve of her face, the wavering irises, the face that he had missed so much…
"My Komand'r… I have returned as I promised."
Blackfire blinked blankly. Before her, a vision of beauty stood. The way he looked at her, the way her heart drummed in her chest, she knew from these things that he knew her and possibly once she knew him as well. It wasn't his words: it was the way his eyes met hers, the way his hand gently touched her face… the way his lips touched hers.
A pain shot through Blackfire's head as D'ucel was forcefully pulled away from her. Her eyes turned to see Aqualad shove himself between her and the man who had kissed her, pushing both men a few feet in front of her. Aqualad's push had been enough for the Tameranian fighter to engage in a skirmish, in seconds the alien fighter pinned Aqualad's arm behind his back. Aqualad twisted his body, but couldn't free himself from his capture's grasp. Aqualad gritted his teeth, grunts escaping his lips as the grip refused to ease.
"I do not know why you have attacked me, but if you do not desist, I will be forced to cause you harm." D'ucel spoke calmly and slowly, each word waited with consequence and compassion. In other circumstances, Aqualad wouldn't have found it infuriating.
The Titans gasped collectively. Starfire stepped forward to break up the misunderstanding; she only made it one step. Blackfire only watched for a moment before purple eye beams erupted, slamming into Aqualad's capture's chest. The blow hurled the unsuspecting D'ucel across the ground, skidding to a stop at Starfire's feet. From there the two could watch Blackfire run to Aqualad's aid, placing worried hands on both his shoulders.
Starfire could feel the uncertainty flowing from D'ucel, it cracked against the air furiously. Before D'ucel could make a step forward to approach Blackfire again, Star grabbed his shoulder. She knew from the way his shoulders tensed that he understood something: that things were different… and Starfire was the only one who knew enough to explain it all.
The eyebeams tearing across the floor and D'ucel's mass slamming into the ground had gained the attention of all the Titans. Blackfire helped Aqualad to stand, barely able to keep her eyes on the dark haired Titan. Her eyes left his face to stare at another face, with blue eyes that watched her intently. The pain again came to her head; her fingers rubbed the tense muscle beside her eye. Aqualad pushed her hand away, touching her face and surprised to find fever racing up her cheeks. His dark eyes left Blackfire's face for just a moment to throw a look at the man who not moments ago had kissed his girl. Moments ago Blackfire had been happy and painless, within seconds of contact a painful ache came over her face. Aqualad's eyes narrowed: he didn't know who the newcomer was, but he wanted him gone.
Robin stepped forward taking in the scene before him. "What's going on?" Starfire turned her head to look at him.
"Friends… Please let us retire to the common room. We have much to discuss."
The tale from Starfire came in bits and pieces. For the most part she was forced to remember things from when she was just a small child and in the innocence of her state of mind didn't recognize the severity of it. As Starfire spoke she realized that the story would make more since if it was more than just herself and D'ucel piecing the fractured history together. Her green eyes turned to her older sister: behind those unadultered eyes were the corner pieces and detailed puzzle fragments of the past… lost there and useless…
"Before the death of my father, the allies of Tameran sent a request for aide in a war against those who were impeding on their resources and causing much pain and distress. Tameran sent warriors to protect our friends in a very distant end of the Turblorc quadrant." Starfire began, her powerful fingers were gripped against each other in a form that reminded Aqualad of prayer. He saw that D'ucel was holding his the same way and had his fingers not been gently interrupting Blackfire's balled fists, he suspected hers would have pulled together the same way.
"At this time I was only seven years old… however, my sister was twelve… just at the age for marriage arrangements to be prepared. As the eldest daughter to the throne, the Grand Ruler desired only the best warrior for her hand… he wanted Foxfire…"
D'ucel nodded his head, clearing any uncertainty to who Star was referring to. "It is Tameranian tradition for a long engagement, where the male must prove his worth in battle. Though I had proved myself to be a matchless champion to Tameran in many wars and gauntlets, it was the will of my Grand Ruler that I prove my value by giving the aid to our allies."
"My sister and Tameran's Foxfire were to be married a year following the cease of the battles. My sister waited in great anxious fever for news of the war to end and for D'ucel's return… A year pasted and Tameran fell into a saddened state. My father… lost his life… leaving Tameran with a chancellor's rule… The chancellor recalled all the soldiers from battle… Over the course of the following year, many of the warriors of Tameran returned… however… D'ucel did not."
D'ucel said nothing, his heart felt sour… he had expected some sort of emotion from Blackfire to reach his heart, but nothing came from her. Instead, Starfire's sadness sunk into his chest as she continued her story.
"We were told that Foxfire would not be returning to us… The great many of our people mourned for him. Blackfire mourned the longest. In her great sadness, she became inconsolable and after one year of the last warriors' return, my sister left Tameran…"
"Only a few weeks ago was I able to make the return to Tameran. I was told that Komand'r was banished… I did not understand how my sweet beloved could be turned away from our people. I could not believe the terrible things they had spoken of Komand'r doing. I desired to find her… I was told that possibly Koriand'r could tell me where to locate her… so I came here." D'ucel finished, taking his eyes across the room, ignoring the radiating displeasure coming from Aqualad to lay his eyes on his fiancée. "I have waited many years to be reunited with you Komand'r! We must make the homecoming to Tameran! There we can be granted marriage!"
D'ucel stood up. Aqualad did too. "You can't marry her!" Aqualad shouted, balling his fists.
"Of course I can! She is my fiancée! She was promised to me by the Grand Ruler and she accepted the proposal! We must go to Tameran for the ceremony!"
Everyone but Aqualad, Blackfire and Beast Boy gasped. Beast Boy slumped against his seat. As much as he loved drama, and no drama trumped Tameranian tradition, he wasn't focused on Aqualad and the blonde spiky haired guy's beef. He was worried about the woman who had given him life, the woman who raised him and loved him unconditionally: the only woman whose love for him would never betray him.
Terra's eyes shifted back and forth between Aqualad, Blackfire and D'ucel, with every pass she caught a quick glimpse of Raven watching the drama unfold. She was nearly knocked over when Aqualad's thunderous steps sent tremors through the floor as he stomped to stand eye to eye with D'ucel.
"You're not taking her anywhere! You have no claim on her!"
"Who are you to stay that?" D'ucel asked.
Aqualad blushed furiously. His mouth opened and closed, unable to find his voice. "I'm her… She's my!..." He groaned in frustration, only an hour ago he had asked Blackfire to be more than friends and she had said yes. For the life of him he couldn't understand why the anxiety wouldn't clear.
Robin stepped forward, putting a body between the Tameranian battle king and the incoherent Atlantian. Robin turned his back to Aqualad and faced D'ucel.
"I'm afraid we can't just let you take Blackfire away. It's been a long time since you and Blackfire even saw each other… we can't even be sure she feels the same way about you…"
"The love I have for Komand'r can not be defeated by time or space!"
Starfire stood up, her hand close to her chest in worry. A sharp tug pulled at D'ucel again as the green eyed princess approached him. Her face was calm and her voice was slow even though her heart was throbbing in her chest.
"We believe that is so my friend, but I fear that Blackfire's feelings have been defeated by the Grugdindorf."
"Grugdindorf?" D'ucel pulled his eyes away to Blackfire, tracing her face for something to spark; some emotion to pool from her and enter his heart… but there was nothing… not even a trace. There must be a trace! D'ucel brushed past Aqualad and knelt before Komand'r. "Is that true? You chose a Grugdindorf for your history?"
Blackfire nodded.
"Why?"
Blackfire had no answer. Robin and Speedy managed to restrain a furious Aqualad long enough for Raven and Starfire to stand on either side of D'ucel's shoulders.
"We don't know why… she doesn't either." Raven stated.
"Where is her tape?"
"Tape?" Starfire asked.
"Yes. With the cleansing of the mind a last record is taken to be given to you with your key. Your key tells you where to go… your record tells you why."
Celine stood up then, crossing her arms over her chest. "In my research, I didn't come across anything about a tape. Only a key."
"Tapes are not a part of the public record. They are stored at the Yinti Home World. It can only be accessed by whomever had the Grugdindorf preformed…"
Blackfire spoke for the first time since encountering D'ucel. "Then I can remember… everything?"
"Yes." D'ucel grabbed her hand. "Whatever you wished to be remembered forever would be on that tape! I believed that you must have made the mention of me and our promise to each other!"
Aqualad knocked Speedy and Robin to the floor and dashed to D'ucel. He pulled the other man away from Blackfire. "What does that matter? Even if we see that tape it won't change anything!"
"Will it not?"
Aqualad and D'ucel turned their faces. Both of them were surprised to see that it was Blackfire who spoke. The black haired girl stood, holding her hand the way D'ucel and Starfire had when telling their fractured story. "My past is a part of me… a part I have lost… If I can see what was my past… it will be the way I can see my future."
Aqualad sagged, unable to believe what he heard. Is it that easy… to give up on me? Raven watched the scene unfolding, a part of her heart ached for Aqualad and again for Blackfire. There was pain there, confusion and uncertainty above all else.
She is the exact opposite of me: her shadows lie behind her in the darkness of her past… mine wait for me to burn out my shining hope for the future…
"If Blackfire wants to… maybe going to the Yinti Home World and acquiring her tape is in her best interest… She has to make decisions and it is only fair that she knows everything about the consequences of her choice." Raven said smoothly.
"Yes." D'ucel said, facing the group. "I will take my Komand'r and return her true self."
"Oh no, you don't! I'll take her!" Aqualad shouted.
"Why you?" D'ucel asked again. Again Aqualad couldn't find his words.
Cyborg stepped forward, acting the diplomat. "I think we're all going. We've all put investment into helping Blackfire get to where she is… we're all going to be there when she gets to where she's going."
"Agreed. Titans lets prepare for a voyage to…"
Beast Boy shot out of his chair. "I don't care what you do! I'm not going!"
"Beast Boy? What's wrong?"
"I didn't get my magazine."
"What does that matter?" Aqualad asked.
"My magazine always comes with a letter from my mother! I think something is wrong! She's never missed a letter before!"
Terra's eyes widened when everything fell into place. Beast Boy had only talked about his mother in passing when she would find him sometimes sitting on the beach. The blonde girl scratched her head.
"Beast Boy… we didn't know… we could wait to go… we could fly to your home and check on her if…" Robin offered.
"No… I don't want you guys to stop what you're doing… I can find my mom on my own."
"Beast Boy… Do you want company? Not all of need to go to Yinti."
"Don't worry about me. I'll just feel better when I see her… You guys go and we'll regroup when you get back."
"If that's what you want. Let's get ready for space." Raven ordered.
It was a highly sensible plan and the Titans set about making it work. Terra hoisted her pack to her shoulders; the weight told her she'd have more than enough entertainment for her first ride through space. The blonde girl cracked her neck swiftly before taking down the hall back towards the stairwell. Her whistling was too random and off key to be called a tune, but she whistled it consistently inconsistent until she passed Celine and Sakura's room. There was a massive duffle bag dumped onto Celine's bed. Terra could barely make out the red haired girl's form as she dashed from place to place finding more things to pack into her bag.
Terra's eyes widened as she watched Celine force more than the bag could handle into the space. She swore if she looked hard enough she could see Loberos' tail wagging pitifully through a hole.
"You're taking all that stuff to outer space?" Terra asked.
Celine stopped what she was doing, finally acknowledging Terra's presence. She smiled at the shorter girl halfheartedly. Terra returned it with the same enthusiasm.
"I'm not going to outer space." She replied, observing her bag as if deciding if she could squeeze anything else into it.
"What?"
Celine looked over her bag again before thrusting her arm into up to her elbow. She rummaged noisily, pulling out a compass and with it several other items. Terra was right; Loberos had been in the bag. The wolf bumped Celine as it trotted to lay on the floor by the door.
"Celine! Why aren't you going?"
"Beast Boy is really concerned about his mother. I'm going to take him home…"
"But he said he didn't need anyone to go with him." Terra replied, dropping her pack onto the floor.
"I know what he said… but I don't think it's the truth. I think I'd feel better if someone was watching out for him. His mother is very important to him. Besides… I don't think I'm missing out by not going to space."
"But we're going to that mind wiping place! I thought you'd want to see all that weird technology!" Terra didn't understand Celine and it was something beyond Celine being a super genius. The way she acted towards her friends, towards strangers sometimes… Terra couldn't make heads or tails of her.
Celine sighed and forced her bag to close. She flipped a lock of hair back behind her shoulder before turning her brown eyes to meet Terra's blue ones. "I'm the smartest woman in the world… I'll get my chances when I need them… But right now… Beast Boy needs someone to keep him together… and I know he'd do the same for me."
"Why wouldn't you be able to keep it together?"
Celine shrugged her shoulder in a non-committing answer.
…
The Titans poured into D'ucel's space craft, Cyborg thought it in their best interest to store the optimized T-ship on board as well, just incase Blackfire made a decision that made D'ucel less than excited about returning them home. They gathered in the waiting haul. Blackfire and Aqualad were in the cockpit with D'ucel, the other Titans arranged themselves to be comfortable for the long flight. Raven propped her chin in her hand as she gazed out the window, watching again as the Earth became smaller and tragically more beautiful. Under the fingers of her free hand, Robin's black hair was tugged and smoothed, the weight of his head warm and heavy in her lap.
Cyborg sat down loudly. "So Celine's going with Beast Boy home?"
Speedy stretched out his legs. "That's what she says. He's really worried about his mom and I guess Celine feels some sort of obligation…"
"Or connection." Raven posited, not turning her face from the endless view of stars. Robin closed his eyes and went to sleep there, pulling her hand from his hair, drawing it over his chest like a security blanket.
Starfire made sure her eyes didn't linger too long on Raven and Robin, or Sakura and Speedy, as she turned her attention to the other company: Terra.
"Are you sure you do not also wish to go with Beast Boy?"
Terra wasn't as wounded to avoid looking to Raven and Robin, both able to shut out the turmoil of the world when they were in each other's arms. Terra sighed a little, putting her knees to her chest.
"No thanks… I'm not ready to meet the parents."
The End of Part Four
A/N
¹Blaxrig is a half-year
Speaking/thinking like Starfire is the hardest thing I've done to date and that includes Calculus. I realized I've been a little biased against Starfire, she gets less time than Bumble Bee… which is saying something. Even though this story is mostly Robin x Raven (which again will intensify next chapter) this chapter is mostly Star/Blackfire/Aqualad/D'ucel with Beast Boy/Celine/Terra thrown in the background. Again, this is the last build up before the meat and bones of this story.