Sho was getting good at this.
The tattoo was actually looking like it was supposed to. He had figured out how deep you were supposed to push, finally, and how close together that you had to make the pokes. Too far apart and too close together and it just made a mess. Also you were supposed to clean your needle before and after you used it, too, otherwise you would get an infection and then the whole thing would look terrible. That was where Sho had gone wrong before when he had practiced on himself…well he had gone wrong in a lot more ways than that but….well he was doing better now. He was doing a hell of a lot better.
That dog actually looked like a dog.
Drawing dicks was fun but Shimazaki wouldn't have wanted Sho to draw a dick on him. He had said so. Not that Sho was doing this for him. Not that Sho had been working hard on perfecting his skills so that Shimazaki would let him tattoo something on him. Something like his favorite kind of dog. He liked the yellow ones, not that he knew what yellow was, but the yellow ones were the friendliest and he liked those best. Also he liked dogs with curly tails because curly tails were funny. That was why Sho had done a dog with a curly tail…because it was a good thing to draw. Not because Shimazaki would have liked it….well he would have…and Sho had gotten better….
Much better.
Maybe well enough that he could…well Shimazaki liked tattoos and his birthday was coming up…and Sho was maybe partially fallen out of love with him by now. He'd been hanging out with Fukuda and stuff and just mostly avoiding Shimazaki…even though stuff was so boring without him. Stuff had been so boring without him and…and it was for the best. Sho needed to fall out of love with him. Once he fell out of love with Shimazaki then everything would be better. He just…he needed to finish up already. Falling out of love. Figuring out how to go at least one day without thinking about him. Figuring out how to just….not want to be near him all the time….and stuff….
Sho couldn't wait until this 'love' thing was over and done with.
"Ok, you're done." Said Sho as he wiped off the last of the extra ink. It ran sometimes. You were supposed to wipe off the extra ink and blood. After that you were supposed to put plastic wrap over it. Sho wouldn't be doing that part, though, because Fukuda would just use his powers to erase what Sho had done. He always did that.
He didn't like tattoos.
He didn't like tattoos or climbing trees or petting dogs or throwing things at people and then running away or even messing with Hatori. He just…well he was Fukuda. He liked playing games, and losing them, and he liked watching TV and getting on Sho to eat more than poptarts and drink more than cola and not eat with his hands and take his food apart and stuff….but he was ok. He may not have liked a lot of stuff but he still agreed to stuff, like letting Sho practice on him, so it wasn't all bad.
Even if he was closing his eyes and acting like Sho had cut his arm off instead of just drawn a dog on it.
"I'm afraid to even look." Said Fukuda with his eyes closed. He loved Sho, he really did, and he was mostly playing….but if Sho had drawn another…well he was getting to that age…but there were so many other things to draw in this world. He used to draw animals, all sorts of animals, and his drawings had always been so cute…but he was eleven now and he was getting to be too old for cute things…but that was ok. Kids grew up, it was what they did, and there was nothing that you could do but let them grow up. He would always mourn the child that Sho had been but he was growing into a whole new person now and Fukuda…well he could get used to this new person too. He had to.
Even if this person was getting to…that age.
"What? Are you saying that I didn't do a good job?" asked Sho. He narrowed his eyes. He had done a good job. Everything looked like what it was supposed to look like. He had gone slow and deep enough and made sure that he had used real tattoo ink…and if Fukuda thought that he was going to sit there and insult his skills then he was going to wake up to a dick drawn on his forehead.
"No, I know that you did a good job, I just know what you probably did a good job on." Said Fukuda with a laugh. He could feel Sho glaring it at him. It was a little like when Suzuki would glare at him…only less…terrifying. Suzuki always looked like he was one step away from killing someone. Sho could look that way, too, to he was just…adorable in his angry glares.
"It's not another dick if that's what you're worried about." Said Sho. He knew how to draw things besides dicks….dicks were just funny. Really funny. The funniest thing ever. Shimazaki thought so too so Sho knew that he was right and…and now he had thought about Shimazaki again. That had been a whole hour…a new record….if sleeping didn't count.
"Alright…I trust you. I am looking down….now…and that's a really cute dog. You've gotten a lot better at this." said Fukuda. Well that was a relief. That was a really cute dog. There was a lot of skill there. Sho…well he could have made a career out of it, maybe, it was better than what he was going to end up doing with his life. Being a tattoo artist was better than being the future master of the world…still not a good job, though, Sho could have done a lot better. He could have been a real artist…in another life…but Fukuda wasn't going to sit there and think about some other life that they could have been living. He was living this life and so was Sho…and this was the best that they could do.
"Thanks. That's the best kind of dog, you know, the yellow friendly ones." Said Sho. He missed finding yellow friendly dogs to pet. Hey jumped up and they were all happy…and stuff. He missed…he missed the dogs and…the times when he and Shimazaki would go and see them and…and he wasn't good at this falling out of love thing.
"Yeah labs are pretty great…but I'm pretty sure that they don't have curly tails." Said Fukuda. He felt the dog Sho had drawn on him. He overrode his body's natural healing response, he could do that for a little bit. Not forever, no, it got exhausting after a while…but just for long enough to look at what Sho had done. Fukuda was not a fan of tattoos, they were for criminals and Fukuda…hadn't personally committed any crimes, but any art from Sho was good art.
"Well that dog does. All the best dogs have curly tails. Shima-someone said that." Said Sho. He looked down and started to pack his things up. He needed something to do. He needed to do something so he could finally stop thinking about Shimazaki and how awesome he was and how much Sho missed him and how much fun they used to have and…and stuff. He needed to stop thinking about this now so he could be friends with Shimazaki again later…not that they had ever stopped being friends…but he just…had taken some space to fall out of love and…
And he needed to go figure out something else to talk about and think about and…and stuff.
"You're right, all the best dogs have curly tails….anyway, what do you want to do now? We can play one of your fighting games or we can watch Zootopia again or we could-" said Fukuda. Sho was packing up to go…and it was getting close to his bedtime. He had skipped bath time, Fukuda was not getting into that battle with him, and he could miss his bedtime if he wanted to. Sho's bedtime had been set by his sister and…well he needed to learn that he didn't have to listen to her. She had power over him in Claw but…well she wasn't that much older than him. Sho didn't have to come running just because his sister told him so.
He didn't have to go.
He didn't have to go and just….leave like that. Fukuda…he would miss him. Fukuda always missed him and, well, they'd been spending a lot of time together. It was just like it had been before. Before certain pragmatic choices had to be made. Back like when Sho had been young…well younger. There was no going back to the child that he had been, Fukuda had made his peace with that, but Sho…well he was growing up and Fukuda could get to know the person that he was becoming now. He could spend time with the person that he was now.
He wanted to spend time with the person that he was now.
"It's almost nine, I have to go home. Sorry. We can hang out more tomorrow." Said Sho. He had to go to bed at nine. Big sis was going to put him to bed…well she would tuck him in because he was too tired to do it himself and she had to read to herself before bed and he just happened to be in the same room that he was in…and that kind of helped him go to bed too. He had to go home and…and big sis wanted him to come home. She still loved him.
He didn't think that she didn't love him.
She was just…busy. She was busy with the new guy. Shimazaki said that he was like Hatori but worse. He was that big purple blotch over in the corner of his eye. Big sis's new friend. Big sis had a friend and he needed her, she spent most of her time with him these days, and that was ok. Sho had stuff going on too. They both had stuff going on and…and that was ok…
She was still his sister and he was still her brother and being brother and sister ranked way higher than being new friends.
"You don't have to go home just because your sister told you too. You aren't that much younger than her, you know." Said Fukuda. Sho used to never let himself be told what to do. Sho…well he didn't have to listen to Shigeko. Suzuki gave her too much power…power that Sho should have had. He didn't want Sho to have that kind of power, he didn't want Sho to be involved in any of this insanity, but he did want Sho to have some kind of future. Whatever was happening with Shigeko and Suzuki…well it wasn't going to be good for Sho…and Fukuda had no idea what to do about that…but he could at least get Sho to realize that he didn't have to give his sister power over him.
"Yeah, I know. I can do math…dad doesn't think so but I can….it's just that I don't want to make big sis sad. She's got a lot going on…and stuff." Said Sho. She loved him. That was what mattered. She loved him and he didn't care if she cared about the new guy. About how he was scared of everything. About how he couldn't control his powers. About how he got freaked out all the time over everything. She still loved him and…and he wasn't going to wake up and she would be gone. That wasn't how…how things worked…with brothers and sisters.
"Right. Her new 'friend'." Said Fukuda with a shake of his head. That guy. That big purple…whatever…off in the corner of his perceptions. Shigeko had found him herself, she was finding her own assets these days it seemed, and the man…well he was….well Fukuda didn't need to know him to know that in terms of strength he was right up there with…near to….Shigeko. She had found herself a powerhouse, apparently, and he had no idea why she had done that…well her go to explanation about the power of friendship…but there was more to it. He knew that there was more to it…he just couldn't see it…
It was so hard to tell with Shigeko sometimes.
Suzuki…well he was transparent. He had always been very transparent about his goals. Shigeko…he had no idea what her goals even were. She wanted Claw to prosper, obviously, and she played the part of the dutiful daughter and the sweet little girl…but she was planning something. She was Suzuki's daughter after all and he was always planning something. Even when he was teetering on the edge he was planning something….
Fukuda thanked God that Sho had turned out as normal as he was.
"Yeah. There's him, too. Big sis said that he's one of those shut in guys and he's afraid of everyone and won't come out of his room and he can't control his powers and stuff. She's got to hang out with him all the time and stuff. She doesn't need to worry about me." Said Sho. Big sis…she had a lot going on. She had offered, too, to bring Sho over…but that was where Shimazaki lived and…and he just…wasn't out of love yet. Plus, well, if he wanted to hang out with a Hatori then he would just hang out with cool Hatori…and somehow Hatori had become 'cool Hatori' and stuff….and he was sure that the new guy was nice and all….
But he was big sis's friend and…and Sho always wanted new friends but…well he had a lot going on right now.
"Well you could just leave her to…whatever she's got going on over there. Come on, we can have popcorn with a full sized cereal bowl of that salted butter you like and-" said Fukuda
"We can do that tomorrow, ok? I have to go home now. I know that you're lonely and stuff but…well you like my dad. You can hang out with him or something…ok? I have to go now and if you get lonely just hang out with dad, ok?" asked Sho. Sometimes Fukuda could be so clingy and stuff. That was just because his only friend was dad. Being friends with dad would mess anyone up. Sho…well he knew hat he was pretty much Fukuda's second friend and stuff but…well…he had to go home now.
So that was what he did.
He said his goodbyes and he put on his shoes and put his stuff in his backpack and then he went back home. He had to go home and sterilize his needles and he had to get into his pajamas let big sis read to him…read NEAR him. Near, not to, because he was eleven. Well he would be eleven soon and as an eleven year old he was way too old to have someone reading him bedtime stories. In fact maybe he should even tell her to leave him alone at night. Maybe he should tell her to read in another room and….
And maybe he was getting ahead of himself.
Why mess with their nightly routine? Those were important…and stuff. Also he wasn't going to just kick her out of their room. She could read wherever she wanted to read and he could deal with that. Yeah, there was no need to be making any more big changes. They had a new friend and that was a big enough change to making right now. Maybe when he was almost twelve instead of almost eleven, then maybe he could have her read in the other room. Yeah. That was a good idea, he could do that.
He would do that.
He added that to his to do list. Ok, so he was going to fall out of love with Shimazaki, sterilize his tattoo needles, change into pajamas, and get big sis to stop reading with him in the room when he was almost twelve. Yeah. He could do that. He would do that. He would do the hell out of that. Things were easier to do when he put them into steps like that…and with the most important step being first then he could get it out of the way….and it would be easy. Yeah, step one was always the easiest. He just had to fall out of love with Shimazaki and it would be easy and-
It would have been easier if Shimazaki hadn't teleported right in front of him.
He had barely even made it to his house when he felt the energy around him shift and Shimazaki was, all of a sudden, right there. He was right there and he was in sleeping clothes…which wasn't that many clothes at all…not that Sho cared or anything like that…because that would have been a weird thing to care about. This whole thing was a weird thing to care about…and he needed to stop caring…starting…now.
Right now.
"Sho, just the tiny little man I needed to see." Said Shimazaki. Thank God he caught the kid on his way home. He could not take another minute of that house. Toshi being all weird and the new guy's aura screaming twenty four seven….it was a madhouse and not at all in a good way. That kid could make it a madhouse in the good way, he always did, and frankly the two of them were way overdue to hang out.
"But you can't see me." Said Sho. He wished that he had come up with something better to say. He should have come up with something better but his stupid brain was being stupid and…and he just…this was why he needed to fall out of love. Love made you stupid, really stupid, and also it made you feel weird and stuff…and really he would have been a lot better off without it. Without this stupid goldfish feeling…and he wished that it would just get tired and stop already…but it never did.
"How many times do I have to tell you, Sho, that only I get to make blind jokes? When you go blind then you can make all the blind jokes you want but until that day comes you have to keep your mouth shut…or at least come up with better ones." Said Shimazaki
"Sorry…anyway….what do you need to see me for?" asked Sho
"I'm bored as fuck. Toshi's being all weird and the new guy is just…well you can hear his aura. It's just never ending screaming….and the screaming is better than the crying at least." Said Shimazaki
"Auras can cry?" asked Sho. He wondered if his ever did. He knew that he cried…a lot more than he should have. He knew that he should have just kept his tears in his eyes where they belonged, he was almost eleven after all and a boy too, and he knew that he would have no choice but to die on the spot if Shimazaki had heard him crying. He already thought that Sho was uncool from the whole 'tattooing himself' thing…and
"No, he just cries when he thinks that nobody's around. Between him and Hatori, he's a crier too but at least he does his crying everyone once in a while, I'm starting to lose my mind…and not in a good way." said Shimazaki
"Well what do you want me to do about it?" asked Sho. He would do whatever Shimazaki wanted him to. Even…Shimazaki was not going to tell him to kiss him. Sho was out in front of his house where anyone could have seen and…and even they had been alone then Shimazaki still wouldn't have asked to kiss him…or not even asked. Just picked him up and held him close to his chest and…and now that stupid goldfish was putting weird thoughts in his brain.
"Honestly? No clue. I just wanted to hang out with you. You know I don't think this far ahead." Said Shimazaki. Maybe he had said the wrong thing, that kid's heartrate was through the roof, but he didn't really care. Sho had a crush on him, had confessed to him numerous times, but that didn't change the outcome. Sho was a great kid and his favorite tiny little friend, well he was tied with Mob, but no because he got the title of little bestie…well it wasn't a contest and Mob was busy anyway with the new guy. God. For all of Sho's clinginess and jealousy at least he wasn't as needy as that new guy was. Shimazaki could at least be grateful for that.
"Um…it's my bedtime." Said Sho. He wanted to punch himself in the stomach, right in the goldfish, for assaying that. How could he had been so stupid? That was just….he sounded like such a little kid there. his BEDTIME?! Why not just tell Shimazaki that he needed big sis to put a bib on him and feel him gross baby mush with no ranch? He just…he was his own worst enemy.
"Sorry. Well I'll see you in the morning then." Said Shimazaki. Well that sucked…he'd have to find something else to do. There had to be something going on in this city on a Tuesday night….something as fun as hanging out with Sho….Sho had was getting kind of boring these days. Seriously. Since when did he give a damn about bedtimes?
"Wait! I…fuck bedtimes." Said Sho. Fuck it. He was almost eleven years old practically a man even, and he could do whatever he wanted to. He wasn't a little kid anymore. He could go to bed when he felt like it.
"You're ten, you're too young to be fucking abstract concepts." Said Shimazaki with a laugh. God, he missed this.
"I can fuck whatever I want and I say fuck bedtimes." Said Sho. Just because he was still only ten that did not mean that he couldn't stay up all night and do fun stuff with Shimazaki. He was Suzuki Sho. When he grew up he would rule the world. He could do whatever he wanted and what he wanted to do was stay up all night! Until the sun came up! Yeah! It wasn't like he had school or anything like that!
"Fine, when you get older then we'll go out and pick up abstract concepts. How's that sound?" asked Shimazaki. He could tell that the kid was confused…right. He was ten. A lot of stuff just went right over his little head.
"Huh?" asked Sho. Well now he had no idea what they were talking about…and he wasn't even sure if he knew what an abstract concept was.
"Nothing, I just forgot how little you were-" said Shimazaki. He felt a hit coming. He let it come. Sho hit him right in the stomach. Not hard enough to hurt, he still had his barrier up, but hard enough to let Shimazaki know that he'd meant business there. God, this kid was so high strung…but in the funny way. Not the wake everyone up by creating a localized earthquake way…fucking new guy….
"I am not little! For your information I'm almost ten! You should know, you have my birthday tattooed on your arm and…and I don't need a bedtime anymore or…or anything and…and I am not a little kid anymore!" said Sho as he hit Shimazaki in the stomach. Shimazaki had let him. He could have teleported out of the way or hit Sho but he just let it happen…because he thought that Sho was a little kid…
And that was all that he would ever see him as.
That fact doesn't make him fall out of love any faster. If anything it just makes him imagine himself as an adult and Shimazaki as an adult…but not old, the way he was now, and also…well if they had both been adults then it would have been easy for them to…but they aren't adults…well Sho knows that he isn't and…and he may not have been an adult but he wasn't a little kid anymore either!
He was eleven….almost!
"Right, right, right, you're all grown up now. Grow up enough to take a swing at me, anyway, which I deserved-" said Shimazaki
"You did." Said Sho
"And you don't need a bedtime either-" said Shimazaki
"I don't." said Sho
"And you've ben mastering the art of stick and poke." Said Shimazaki. There. That was something that would take his mind off of what was happening with the new guy and Toshi and everything…and also it had been a while since he'd gotten worked on…and the kid was supposedly one hell of an artist. Well, ok, his first tries had been shit apparently but he'd been practicing so Shimazaki had every faith in him…and if not then he could always get healed.
He just wanted to spend time with Sho, that was all.
"I…well I'm not a master at it but….but I got better. I do good work now. Not like…before." Said Sho. He was red. He was glad that Shimazaki couldn't see how red he was…but he could sense it. His whole self was warm and red. His face was red and the rest of him must have been red from how warm he was. Especially in his stomach. He would have thought that the goldfish would have cooked in the hot tub that was his stomach but now…well not it was worse…and also it had invited some friends it felt like and…and the whole thing was weird but…in a good way…maybe.
"Cool. So, want to show me what you can do?" asked Shimazaki
"Wh-what? You want me to do a tattoo for you? Really? Even after…before?" asked Sho. That was…well now there was a whole goldfish party in his stomach and…and maybe he was having a heart attack and…and this was just…wow. Shimazaki…he thoughts….Ryou thought that he was cool enough…and good enough…to give him a tattoo and…and even after what happened it sounded like…like he was ok with it and…and Sho….he felt like….almost like…like Shimazaki had kissed him. Like that time when he'd been kissed and he liked it and…and he knew that hadn't happened but….it felt just like that…but in his stomach…if that even made any sense.
"Yeah. It's my birthday, almost, and I know that you were practicing to do one for my birthday so come on. If it gets messed up or infected then I can just get it healed. So, what do you say?" asked Shimazaki with a shrug.
"Uh….sure." said Sho. He knew that this was the last thig that he should have been doing. Big sis was in the house and she didn't like it when he did this…and also he might have messed up and then Shimazaki would have thought that he wasn't cool anymore…and also being near Shimazaki was not going to help him fall out of love…but…well….Shimazaki did have a birthday coming up and he had asked Sho to do a tattoo…and he did have all of his tools and….and he had gotten better so why not?
He may have been bad at falling out of love but at least he had gotten better at doing tattoos…and doing tattoos was a hell of a lot more fun anyway.