Sometimes Mob made mistakes.
Sometimes she made small mistakes, like when she forgot to put the clothes in the dryer and they got that gross mildew smell, and sometimes she made medium mistakes like when she let Sho have two poptarts after his bath even though the sugar gave him too much energy before bedtime, and sometimes she made big mistakes like the time she got into a fight with dad and threatened to leave him…like had happened a few hours ago….but that wasn't the mistake that she was worried about now.
Though she had made a mistake.
"How….all of them….how did you…all of them?" asked the Scar. She didn't know his name, and she hadn't seen him before she would have remembered that scar on his eye…how he could still see she didn't know…but it didn't matter if she knew him or not. She had messed up and now she was sorry and now…now she had to figure out what she was going to do about this.
"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. I didn't that they were your spirits." Said Mob. She would have kowtowed if there had been room. She was in another one of the haunted rooms. This one had been full of spirits and Awakened…and a Scar…and now it just had the Awakened and a Scar there. She couldn't tell if this Scar was mad at her or not, he was just staring at her, but she sort of thought that he was.
After all she had exorcised all of his sprits.
She hadn't seen him, though, she had only seen the spirits…and she had never seen so many spirits in one place like that…so she had exorcised them. It had been a reflex, that was all, just something that her powers had done without her realizing it. She had been surrounded by evil spirits, and they had been evil, so she had gotten rid of them….and that had been the point of the room. But she hadn't known that. This room was supposed to be the spirit room…and it was full of Awakened wearing bedsheets like ghosts…and she hadn't thought that there would have been real spirits in the room….
And she was so sorry for what she had done….so very sorry.
"I don't think that spirits can truly belong to anyone." Said Minegishi. They grabbed her by the arm. She had been about to kowtow even though there wasn't any room for it, not really, and also this was a brand new dress….none of those things mattered when she was sorry about something. Minegishi was stopping her from saying sorry…and she didn't know why…and she was too sorry to think about why Minegishi didn't want her to be sorry.
"…you exorcised them all…" said the Scar. He looked around even though he had been there when she had exorcised them all. One had popped out and then the others and then it had just been instant…and she was so sorry. She had no idea that people could collect spirits like Pokémon…well she had read everyone's files but…well she had never thought that she would ever end up meeting this particular Scar. He was from the Seventh Division and dad never took them there because he hated Seasoning City. She hadn't thought that anyone from that Division would come, too, since dad was still mad about
"I…um….I can catch more! Like um…well I don't know how to catch spirits but…well I can try…and Minegishi can help me. Right?" asked Mob. She turned towards Minegishi. They just shrugged.
"That's all you, Mob, I don't mess with spirits." said Minegishi. Mob…well she knew that not everyone could exorcise them…and she knew that not everyone had the powers that she had….and she knew that not everyone was as powerful as her….but they could have still tried to help her…and stuff….because she had messed up…but maybe she had to do it herself.
She was the one who had messed up after all.
She was the one who had exorcised the spirits just like she was the one who had fought with dad and…and she needed to stop thinking about that. Minegishi was right, she hadn't done anything wrong, and she had been defending Sho….so it was ok. What she had done before was ok…but what she had done just now wasn't and…
And she had to fix this.
"I…you didn't even….try….you just…Oreo-chan….Skittle-chan….Raisin-chan…Swedish Fish-chan…." said the Scar. Mob…well she didn't know what he was so upset about…her not trying, she meant. She knew that those spirits must have been like his pets and she knew that's he had gotten rid of them…and she didn't know what he was on about, her not trying, and she just…well she would figure out how to fix this and then she would figure out, later, what he was on about.
"Are these spirits or a shopping list?" asked Minegishi. They looked over at the Scar and smiled at him…and Mob had no idea what everyone was smiling about. She had no idea what, if anything, about this was worth smiling about. She had killed….well not killed…but she had destroyed a bunch of spirits. They had been evil spirits, sure, but they had belonged to someone…and that someone's aura was all…pointy but close…like a shield of spikes…and she deserved to get poked by that shield of spikes since she was the one who had messed up.
She had messed up really bad.
"It was an accident, really. I really am sorry! Please let me make it up to you…um….do you want to be friends? We can be friends and then you can teach me how to catch spirits and then I can catch a bunch for you and…and stuff." Said Mob. There. Friendship was the best thing ever and she could always use more friends and everyone else could always use more friends and she could…well she could see why he wouldn't have wanted to become friends with her…because she did exorcise all of his spirits, but she also just…didn't know why someone wouldn't have wanted to be her friend.
She considered herself to be a very good friend.
She always made sure that her friends were happy and she always spent time with them and she tried her best to make them get along, Shimazaki tried his best right back to be sort of mean to them so it cancelled out, but she still tried. She still tried and trying made her a good friend…right? Well….not that she knew, exactly, whether or not this guy wanted to be her friend or not. He might not have….and the thought of someone not wanting to be her friend…well that was a hard one….
Minegishi flicked her over the head.
"Calm down, Mob, they were just mindless spirits. This guy can always go and catch more, can't you…" said Minegishi
"Matsuo…Matsuo Shinzuka." Said Matsuo. Mob made sure that she remembered his name…or hers since that was a girl's name…or theirs? Minegishi had a boy's name, Toshiki was usually a boy's name, but they had been born a girl and they were a 'they' now and…well she would ask later. Once she made sure that Matsuo knew that she was very sad for what she had done. Unless it wasn't ok to ask, though, in that case she would keep all of her questions to herself.
"Minegishi Toshiki…and this is Suzuki Shigeko, the daughter of our exalted leader." Said Minegishi. They patted her on the back. Mob nodded. She had forgotten how to introduce herself…and that was the worst. She should have remembered how to be polite. She should have remembered a lot of things…like not to go and exorcise other people's spirits.
"I like to be called Mob…and it's nice to meet you." Said Mob. She bowed, not kotowed, but the polite sort of bowing that you were supposed to be when you met someone new. She had no idea how she could have forgotten how to be polite like that…well she had been really freaked out before…and she was still sort of freaked out…but she felt better now that they had met and…
Well maybe she had drank a little too much.
"Mob? Why Mob? That's not even a name…uh….IN CHINA! But here it's good!" said Matsuo quickly. He looked at her when he said that…and his aura was all scared….like he was scared of her…or maybe he was just scared because it was Halloween or something…she didn't know. Sometimes people were scared of her…she didn't know why they were scared of her…just that they were.
"Are you always this smooth or was that a fluke?" asked Minegishi in a tone that Mob couldn't understand. She had no idea why they were talking like that….and she would ask later. Right now they had to focus, well she had to focus, on apologizing.
"Only when I know that my life might is in danger." Said Matsuo. He had a tone there, too, and Mob…she had no idea why he was looking at Minegishi like that…or why they were looking at him like that too…and she got the feeling that maybe she was in the middle of something that she shouldn't have been…even though she had no idea what that could have been.
"Oh yes. The little girl is so terrifying in her little Elsa costume, isn't she? Her little braids really add to the terror factor, don't they?" asked Minegishi. They lifted one of Mob's braids to try and be funny, maybe. Mob didn't know. She reached back and took her braid from their hand. There were some laughs there…but she knew that they weren't directed at her. She wasn't the one they were laughing at, Minegishi said that they would never laugh at her, but she couldn't see anything else that they would be laughing at. Adults were weird sometimes.
"She doesn't have to be a droog to be terrifying." Said Matsuo. He reached over and touched the cuff of Minegishi's shirt. They were in a white boy's button down shirt like dad wore. They had on a hat and also some eye liner on the bottom of one eye too. She had no idea what their costume was but she knew that it was impolite to just reach out and touch people like that….but Minegishi didn't seem to care. They just smiled and touched the end of his shirt in the same way that he had touched their shirt…and it was just….
Kind of weird.
"What? You're afraid of a little but of the old ultraviolence?" asked Minegishi. They took half a step closer….and Mob really had to do something. She didn't know what ultraviolence was exactly but she knew enough English to know that it must have been worse than real violence…and she didn't want her friend to be doing any kind of violence to anyone.
"Minegishi, violence is-" said Mob. She tugged on Minegishi's shirt…but that was ok since they were best friends. Minegishi didn't seem to notice, though, unless they were ignoring her…but they would never have done anything as mean as ignore her. They were her friend and friends did not ignore each other. That was not how friendship worked.
"I have nothing against ultraviolence, but I do know when I don't stand a chance and I don't stand a chance against her…or either of you." Said Matsuo
"You never know until you try." Said Minegishi. There were tones there that she didn't understand and words that she thought might have taken on another meaning than the ones she knew…and she didn't know what she was supposed to make of all of this. It sounded like they were talking about fighting but also…not…and she just…well she couldn't let them fight. That was a risk that she didn't want to take. This was a party, not a fight, and there would be no fighting at her party. It was one of her rules and rules were important.
And also fighting was wrong.
"Um…maybe we shouldn't-" said Mob
"I know better than to try against you. You know they still talk about you in the Seventh Division? I can't believe you beat Ishiguro….and I can't believe that she won't shut up about it. You beat her, what, ten years ago?" asked Matsuo
"Try seven, and it wasn't hard. Actually it was boring…but I feel like you might be a little more fun to spar with." Said Minegishi
"Well if you-" said Matsuo
"So, yeah, I'm Mob. Well I'm Shigeko but you can call me Mob or Shigeko or Suzuki or Suzuki Shigeko or Shige even-" said Mob
"Yeah, she likes to be called Mob." Said Minegishi. There was a laugh there and a tone and…and why did adults have to be so weird all the time? She hoped that when she grew up and became an adult she would stay just the same as she was right now…well taller…and looking more like….well like mom and stuff…but not confusing like all of the adults around her seemed to be.
"Mob…right." said Matsuo
"And she's very sorry that she double killed all of your pets, aren't you Mob?" asked Minegishi
"Yes! I am!" said Mob. She nodded and went to kowtow but Minegishi caught her under the arm. Right. She had to stop that because people were looking and…wall she had messed up…but Minegishi didn't like kowtowing anyway. They thought that it was boring and stuff. Mob didn't think that it was boring. She just wanted to make this better.
She hated it when she messed up.
"I…got that already." Said Matsuo
"So tell her that you forgive her so she can come off this already. If you don't then she'll be apologizing all night, trust me on this." said Minegishi
"Really? But she's President Suzuki's daughter, isn't she?" asked Matsuo. Mob frowned. People asked that all the time, if she was dad's daughter, which of course she was. She was dad's kid. She had come from him and mom…even though she didn't look like him. Even though she had black hair and brown eyes. Even though she didn't look a thing like him or even their mom. It was because she was half Japanese. She was half Japanese from two half Japanese people. Mom and dad had passed their genes down to her. They had given her all of the Japanese and Sho all of the half…and that was a very complicated thing to explain….
And she was getting tired of explaining that to people.
"We're still waiting on the results of the paternity test." Said Minegishi. There was a smile there from them…which was a weird sort of smile to see from them now that she thought about it. She had seen them smile before, they knew how to smile even if they didn't do it that often, but she hadn't seen them smile like that towards anyone before. That smile wasn't for her, it was for Matsuo it seemed, and later on when she was done apologizing she'd have to ask Minegishi what all of that was about.
Well she'd have to ask them a lot of things.
"What's a paternity test?" asked Mob. She asked that now because, well, that seemed like it would be much simpler to explain. Minegishi knew a lot of words because they read a lot of books and sometimes they forgot that Mob hadn't read as many books as she had and therefore she didn't know as many word s as they did. She had no idea what a paternity test was, well she knew what a test was, and she was glad to be rid of them. She hadn't had a single test since the first grade and she would gladly go the rest of her life, too, without taking a single test.
"Nothing you need to know about. Now say one more 'I'm sorry' so we can move on already." Said Minegishi. That was…well Mob really didn't think that one more would cut it.
"Ok…um….I'm sorry. I can help you catch new ones…or maybe I can figure out a way to the other side so I can see were all the spirits went to and bring them back…if you want." Said Mob
"Mob, we are not spending all of Halloween night trying to find a way to the other side." Said Minegishi
"But Halloween is the day when the barrier between the world of the living and the world of the dead is at it's thinnest, remember you told me that, and that's why we celebrate spooky stuff on this day….so this would be the perfect day to go to a graveyard and find a spirit and then ask how to get to the other side and then astral project and-" said Mob
"Mob, do you even know how to astral project?" asked Minegishi
"No…but dad probably does. He can do anything. He's probably done being mad at me and I can go home and ask him how astral projection works and then he can teach me and I can teach you and then we can g to the other side and bring the spirits back…and also not die, too, that part is important." Said Mob
"You'd seriously do all of that?" asked Matsuo. Mob nodded. What, did he think that she was a liar? Did she come off like that? Did people think that she was just full of lie? Did they think that she was just sitting there telling lie after lie after lie? She….had no idea what she would do if people thought that she was a liar. She tried to be nice…and she was….most of the time…and sometimes it was ok to be a little mean sometimes….but she never lied. Even if she could be mean to the people she loved the most, her own dad even, she wasn't mean enough to be a liar.
She didn't think that she could have ever been that mean to anyone in her entire life.
"Yeah, I messed up so I have to fix it. That's what you do when you mess something up, you fix it. Otherwise that's called being a jerk and I'm not a jerk." Said Mob
"Is she for real?" asked Matsuo. He was looking over her head and talking to Minegishi now. Mob didn't much like it when people talked about her like she wasn't in the room but she said nothing. She wasn't a jerk after all.
"Yup. She's as real as they come." Said Minegishi
"I'm not lying, I don't tell lies, I really will do all of that to fix what I messed up." Said Mob. Now she had to get to the most important part. She had to get to the part where she figured out what she was going to do to fix this. She had messed up and when you messed up you had to fix what you had done. Dad had told her so a million times before…well he had told Sho….but she had been there when he told….well yelled…that at Sho.
"Miss-Vice President Suzuki….I can't believe that I'm talking to the Vice President….you don't have to do that. Really. I'll be fine. I have others, see? I'm really more amazed that you managed to get rid of all of them without even lifting a finger…..just like your dad…" said Matsuo. There was a tone, there, and also something to his aura…like he was scared…and she didn't know why. She didn't know what everyone was so scared of dad for. Sure he could be mean…and he could hit people…and also sometimes when he looked at you with his eyes all small and…stuff…it was scary but…
But she wasn't like dad.
She wasn't dad. She had come from him but she wasn't him. That was why she didn't look like him. She had come from him but she wasn't just some kind of…doll….of him…or clone of him. She was Mob. She was herself and she didn't….she didn't do scary things like dad did. She didn't so scary things or look like him and….
And she didn't know why, now, he was saying that she was like him when just a second ago that he had no idea how she could have been dad's daughter.
"My dad? I'm not like him. Why do you think that I'm like him?" asked Mob
"When I fought him-"said Matsuo
"Mob, why don't you go down to the bouncy house room and I'll meet you there, alright?" said Minegishi. They spoke quickly, and they interrupted, and it was kind of rude of them…and also Mob couldn't leave. How could she leave when she hadn't found out how to fix her mistake yet?
"But-" said Mob
"Go find us a good spot." Said Minegishi
"But I-" said Mob. Minegishi didn't seem to get it. Maybe because they were just…different. They were a different person than she was. Everyone was different from each other. Minegishi could only look at things through their own eyes and from their own point of view. She knew that they didn't care if they messed up and did stuff that hurt other people, sometimes Mob thought that they were only nice to her and Shimazaki sometimes, and she knew that she was not them and they were not her. So it wouldn't matter to them if they were rude.
But it mattered to her.
She hated being rude. She hated being mean. She hated messing up. She had been doing nothing but mess up tonight, it felt like. First with dad and then now. She just…she didn't know why she felt like this. Well because she had messed up….but still. It felt like there was a cloud following her or something. Like a shady cloud that was following her and shading her with shade…shade that she hadn't wanted or asked for and….
And she just wanted to fix one thing that she had messed up. Just one thing.
"Before Ryou throws up in it." Said Minegishi. There was something in their aura and their tone…and she had no idea why it was there…but she knew that they were serious. They wanted her to go and save them a spot right now…maybe because they were actually worried about Shimazaki throwing up. That was something to worry about since he'd drank mushroom tea….and that just sounded gross…and also he'd been eating a lot of food too….so maybe Mob was just hearing things and seeing things that weren't there because she was clueless and stuff.
"I…ok." Said Mob. She may have been clueless about a lot of things but she knew when she had to go. She knew to do as she was told. Even though she didn't like being told what to do…not really. She knew that she was a kid and she had to listen but she was also the boss and…and kids couldn't be bosses but she was….but friendship wasn't about one person being the boss of the other…and stuff. She didn't know. It was complicated.
But she didn't want to mess up.
She had messed up enough as it was already. She had…she knew that she had done what she had to do back with dad…and she knew that Minegishi was usually right about everything….and she also knew that she didn't like being a mean person. She loved her dad and she loved her brother…and she loved her brother more…and if it came down to it then she would leave her dad to keep her brother safe….
But where would she even go?
She had no idea where she and Sho would ever run way to. She knew how to get a plane and fly away…but she wouldn't have been able to. She wouldn't have been a part of Claw….if she left dad then she wouldn't have been a part of Claw anymore. She didn't know what she would do with herself if she wasn't a part of Claw. Claw was her life and…and also she wanted to be a part of it. This was a good place. Not just because they were having a super fun party but also because they were doing super good work.
They were bringing people together.
Not just at this party. They weren't just bringing people together to chase each other down the hall with silly string. Not just to have parties and play games and make people happy. They were bringing people together so that they never had to feel alone. She knew what it was to feel alone…sort of. She'd always had Sho…well for as long as she could remember she'd had Sho but in the beginning he hadn't been much of an esper. He hadn't been able to do more than show his aura for most of his life…back when she'd been little….and back then there had been this feeling of…being alone. Dad had been gone a lot and there had been this feeling of being alone while also being surrounded by people….
It hadn't been a good feeling.
At least she'd had dad and Sho…and mom even though she hadn't been an esper. Mob had at least had people in her family that had been born espers. She knew how rare it was for espers to come from espers. She knew how rare it was to even have an esper kid. Dad had told her so many times…and that was why it was important that she had lot of kids when she grew up, he had said, and she wanted to. She knew that when she had kids Claw would have taken over the world and then her kids would never have to feel alone. No esper would ever have to feel alone.
That was what Claw was for, keeping espers together.
Claw was for bringing espers together and she….she knew that even now she was surrounded by espers but…but why did she feel like this? She felt…not truly lonely but…like this room was empty. She knew that it wasn't. She could hear the bouncy house room long before she stepped into it. She could see that there were other shoes in the pile, if she had been all alone then there wouldn't have been any shoes, and she could see the bouncy house moving up and down and back and forth….so she knew that there were people in there…
Then why did she feel lonely?
She had no reason to feel lonely. She was Mob. Everyone loved her, at least they had in the last opinion poll that she had taken, and she knew that if she asked the Awakened then they all would have been super happy to play with her. She knew that she was lucky to have had so many people in her life….and she knew that she wasn't alone…and she knew that she had no reason to feel alone….
So she jumped.
She climbed into the bouncy house and jumped up and down. She jumped up and down in one spot. This was a big bouncy house…well there were a lot of them…and she had plenty of space. She had made sure that there was plenty of space for everyone. She had planned this party for all of them and she had tried her best…and there was space and…and there was plenty of space to jump…so maybe that was why she felt so alone….
Even though she had no reason to feel alone.
She had no reason to feel the way that she did. She had fought with her dad and…and she had threatened to leave and take Sho…but there was nowhere for her to go. She wouldn't have left. She was Suzuki Shigeko and her place was with Claw…and she couldn't just run away. She was Suzuki Shigeko, not Suzuki Masami, and she could not just run away from home…and not just because running away from home was wrong. She had nowhere to go and…and she hadn't even been thinking when she had said that and….
And she just….
Jumped.
She jumped up and down. She focused on the sound her feet made when they hit the ground. She focused on the way that the floor caved in around her feet. She focused on watching her white socks disappear into the orange ground. This one was a pumpkin. There was a cat and a bat and a ghost too. Also one that was mostly an obstacle course. This whole floor was mostly bouncy houses. They went out into the mezzanine.
She was glad that people liked them.
That was why she had gotten them, so that other people could be happy, and that was what she wanted more than anything else in the world. What was better than the people around her being happy? If she could make the people around her happy then she could be happy herself. She could be happy and…well that didn't matter. She had to stop thinking about herself. She had to think about other people. They were the ones who mattered. The people in her life, her friends, and her family…they were the ones who mattered most in the world…not her…
So she jumped.
She was happy knowing that there were people around her who were happy….and she was even happier knowing that Sho was near. She felt him before she saw him…and if he was there then he was happy….and she wanted her little brother to be happy. She wanted nothing more than her little brother's happiness. She loved her little brother and…and he was with her…and when he was with her then….then she knew that she would always be happy…that she would always be ok.
Because she had to be ok for him.
She was his big sister and she…she was the one who took care of him. Not the other way around. She was the one who took care of him and…and he felt…she couldn't tell how he felt. She could feel his aura getting closer and then…and then it was gone…and now it was back. Now it was back and he was here with Shimazaki….she had been following the path that they had taken when they had teleported…
Oh. She hadn't known that she could do that.
"Hi Shimazaki and Sho." said Mob as she stopped bouncing. Sho had been on the ground. She tried to help her brother to his feet but he didn't seem to want that. Shimazaki was jumping in place…and Mob knew that if it came to it she could get him out of the bouncy house if he had to throw up…even though she really hoped that he didn't have to throw up any time soon….because that was gross…but then again she was his friend and this was what friends were for.
Helping you up and cleaning up your throw up, too.
"Hey Mob. Watch your brother for me…but don't let him go because he's my sitter…I have to find Toshi…I think that they're with someone….just…I don't know why I feel like this….fuck me…." Said Shimazaki before he teleported away. Mob didn't even have time to say bye before he left…and his aura had been…well it felt sort of like he had been sick. He had been sick and…and not sick-sick but like…party sick…or something. She didn't know.
She was just glad that Sho didn't feel like that.
He knew how to have fun without all of that fun. He knew how to have fun with jump a paper towel roll and a piece of string, she'd seen it, and that was a good thing. She knew that she did stuff that kids weren't supposed to do….because she wasn't a kid. She was somewhere between a kid and an adult. Sho was just a kid, still, and she wanted him to be a kid for as long as she could be. She wanted….she wanted to be a kid too…and she was a kid but…well she didn't know that she could have lived like that again…with everyone bossing her around all the time….but Sho….
Well she wanted him to be a kid for as long as he could.
"I don't need you to watch me." Said Sho. He meant it. She knew that he meant it. She knew that it was the truth. Net month he would be eleven. They would be the very same age. They would be…well they were half a year apart….but he would be eleven and she would be eleven and she knew that he didn't need to be watched…because she didn't need to be watched but….
But she wanted to at least be with him….even though he didn't need her to watch him.
"Ok, I won't watch you…but can you bounce with me? Minegishi said that they would meet me here when they were done talking to their new friend and-" said Mob. She wanted to be with Sho. She wanted to share in this bouncy house with him. She wanted to share in everything with him. She wanted to share in life and happiness and…and loneliness. She wanted to share in loneliness with him because…because there were so many people there but….for some reason she still felt like she was alone and….
And she knew that when she was with her little brother she could never be alone.
"I have to find Shimazaki!" said Sho. He said that, he bounced away, and then….well that was that. Her little brother…had gone to his best friend…but that was how things were now. They had best friends and…and they spent time with their best friends. They spent time with their best friends and this not so best friends but still very good friends….and maybe that was getting older. Maybe that was growing up. Maybe growing up meant….this.
Being lonely in a room full of other people.
Sho had been her first friend. She had been one when he'd been born. She had been a baby before he'd been born, and she couldn't remember that time, but she did remember…she remembered being little and…and he had been wrapped in a blanket and he'd smelled weird and she just…she remembered mom saying….it must have been mom…she said 'look Shigeko, someone wants to meet you' and then he'd been there and…and he'd smelled weird and…and he'd cried and….
And he had been her first friend.
He had been her first friend but now he had another friend….not only a friend but someone he was in love with. She couldn't compete with love. She knew how she had acted when she had been in love with Hatori. She knew that she had left Sho to go and be near Hatori…because at the time she had thought that she could have been his girlfriend or something…and it had been just enough to be able to get near him….and Sho…well he must have been feeling the same about Shimazaki….
Love was important.
She knew that Shimazaki wouldn't be able to love Sho back, he was too young and also Shimazaki and Minegishi were in love, but Sho….well having hope was…it was a good feeling. She wanted him to have someone else he loved, she wished that he could have just been in love with his girlfriend or something, or maybe even someone else….someone he could love back…but he had what he had and he felt what he felt and she just wanted him to be happy. She wanted him to be happy. She wanted him to be happy and…and she also wanted to be happy. She wanted to be with him and she wanted to be happy herself but…but her happiness should have come from the happiness of her little brother.
She was so selfish sometimes.
She was being selfish. She was at a party. She was surrounded by people. Her friends were here. She was here with a party with her friends. She should have been happy because her friends were happy and her brother was happy and…and her best friend had told her that she had no reason to be unhappy. So she should have been happy and she shouldn't have been lonely….and she didn't even know anything about being lonely. She had spent her whole life surrounded by people who loved her and…and there were people in this world that had been born and then just…had been alone. Who hadn't had friends and had been all alone and….
And she shouldn't have been so selfish.
She had a friend who hadn't ever had any friends. She had been bouncing here thinking about how alone she was…when she had her friends and her brother and….and she knew someone who had no one….and she should…she knew what she had to do. Where she had to go. She knew that she had no right to be lonely when there were people in the world who were really lonely and….and she knew that she had to go and be with her friend…her loneliest friend…her friend who had no other friends…and she never should have left him alone in the first place….
She had messed up but she could fix this…and she would. She had to. That was what you did when you messed up, you fixed it.