"Why don't you want me?"
"I do want you but I am reluctant to take you because I don't have faith I can care for you properly," Lupin said in a somber manner. I had to laugh out loud at his excuse. Not being able to care for me properly; was he mad? No one has ever cared for me properly, including the almighty Dumbledore.
"What's so funny," he asked with annoyance.
"You. You don't listen to me. I already told you I don't need another pseudo parental authority figure in my life. I need an advocate. Do honestly think I need looking after?"
"Of course you need looking after! You're just a child Harry! And now with Sirius gone I am being called to fill his shoes. I want to Harry but I'm not sure I can."
"Sirius was never parental Professor. He was great friend at best. I miss him like hell but I didn't lose my father or godfather that night; I lost a mate."
"I thought you and Sirius were very close…" Lupin is clearly puzzled.
"We were as close as a grown escaped con can be to a kid who he has known irregularly for approximately two years. I loved the idea of him; I think that is what I miss the most. But to be honest we never had the time to bond; he was locked up here and I was in school most of the time. Occasionally he gave me advice but if you recall you were often involved in those conversations. Just let go of this idea you are holding onto that you have to become my father. I don't need that nor do I want it." I'm surprised I was able to say all that but Lupin's face says he is relieved if not a little confused.
"So what are you saying you want from me Harry?"
"I don't want you to take up guardianship of me."
"I have to; it's what Sirius wanted."
"Let me ask you this: When did he write the will, before or after Azkaban?"
"Before; but that doesn't make a difference."
"It makes a world of difference. He wrote that request when I was still a baby. I'm not a baby anymore. I can look after myself and I think Sirius wouldn't want me to be handed over at this age." Lupin's only immediate response was to shake his head slowly.
"First you're upset because you think I don't want you and now you are telling me you in fact don't want me."
"I do want you but not as my guardian."
"I'm lost. What is it you do want from me?"
"Don't sign the papers. Just be my friend and sometimes allow me to come to you for advice."
"If we're going to friends," he starts with smile spreading across his face, "then we must put a stop to all this Professor nonsense. Your father and Sirius were my best friends and they called me Moony."
"Then are we agreed, Moony?" At the verbal release of his name he walked over to the refuge I had taken against the wall and put a hand on my shoulder and said, "Agreed."
"Harry, what's that on your face?" He was staring concerned at my right cheek. I put a hand up to it and felt the bruise. I had forgotten about the harsh slap I had given myself earlier in the evening.
"Oh, nothing, I forgot, I fell down the stairs this morning before you arrived. I guess its just starting to show now." I lied but it wouldn't do to stir the pot so soon after we decided I was capable to looking after myself. I can tell he doesn't quit believe me but he lets it go and we both rejoin the others in the kitchen.ou
I realize I could end the story here but I do have a chapter alreadywritten involving Harry discovering the power he has that can be used to defeat Voldemort (and it has not been heard before, at least as far as I know). Could be a great new plot twist. Please let me know if you would like me to continue.
Again, I am sorry about the short chapters. Some of them i had planned on combining but I am new to posting and it takes me days to post just one chapter! I have not figured out the whole posting thing just yet but I am sure to improve.
Thanks to all of you reading and reviewing!