Moving hadn't been as bad as Serizawa had thought that it would have been.
He had mostly just played games throughout the entire plane ride, slept through the car ride, and woken up in his new bed at some point after they had gotten to the new house. Miss Suzuki had carried him in with her powers, she had said, and it was hard to believe that someone as small as her could lift him…almost as hard to believe as him having actually moved across the world….
He hadn't been able to leave his room for fifteen years.
And yet here he was in a whole other country! He was all the way across the world in a house in London surrounded by sort of friends, well they were all sleeping but he could feel them around him, and he was out of his room and eating lunch…dinner…breakfast….a meal. A meal in a kitchen that he had made himself…well he had poured his own milk and cereal in the bowl and that was something….this was all something! Him being here…it was something.
More than he had ever thought that…that could ever have been.
He was careful as he ate his...whatever meal this was. He didn't want to wake the others up. The sun was up, and he had been making more of an effort to rise with it, but the others were asleep. Jet lag, Miss Suzuki had called it, because they were going from Tokyo time to London. Wow. Tokyo. He had thought, before, that just going to Tokyo had been something…but now he was in London. He was across the world in London and he was eating chocolate cereal and…and he felt good. Sure, he was farther from home than he had ever been in his life and he was in a house he didn't know in a country where he didn't speak the language and Miss Suzuki was in her own home, on the other side of the wall, and he was here…but he still felt good.
This was going to be a good day.
Well at least he had thought so. He felt a shift in the energy around him. The colors. There were new ones, and they were close, and he saw the colors before he saw the person that they were connected to. One minute he had been alone in the kitchen and then the next he had company…and he handled it very well. He didn't shout, and he only made the kitchen rattle a little, and that was…a good reaction to someone just popping up in front of you like that.
Someone not even half dressed.
"Fuck yeah! Chocolate! This is going to be one hell of a day!" said…Serizawa was blanking on his name….Shimazaki! Yes, that was his name. He was the one who couldn't see…and Serizawa needed to find a better way to describe him since that didn't seem like it was very nice…or maybe it was even less nice to not acknowledge the fact that he couldn't see. Serizawa didn't know. He didn't think that he could ask. That would have been rude…and he didn't want to be rude.
Miss Suzuki wouldn't have liked that.
She liked people to be nice to one another. She liked it when people were friends. So he would make friends with her friends…even though having one friend is already more than enough for him. He wants…he wants to be near her. He knows her. He knows that he'll be safe with her…not that he feels unsafe. No, he worries for the other person. Serizawa doesn't want to accidentally hurt him. It was one thing to accidentally hurt someone, it was another to accidentally hurt a blind person, and especially one of Miss Suzuki's closest friends. Miss Suzuki…she would not have liked that at all…and maybe Serizawa should have gotten up and left…but then he would have been noticed. He isn't moving, he isn't breathing, and he knows that his colors are showing but Shimazaki can't see those…so maybe he should just stay here and perfectly still until…until Shimazaki got what he needed and went back to bed.
Yes. That was a good plan.
Serizawa sat perfectly still as Shimazaki went through the cabinet behind him. He took out boxes, ran his hands over them on all sides, and then opened them. He stuck his hands and head in the box before shaking his head and putting the box down on the counter. He did this over and over again. He was looking for something. Serizawa could tell that he was looking for something….and he could tell that he maybe should have helped. Shimazaki was blind after all and whatever he was looking for…well he might have never found it.
Serizawa wasn't sure.
He didn't know if it was ok to offer to help or not. On the one hand he wouldn't be invisible anymore…but it would have been selfish of him to sit there trying to be invisible whole one of Miss Suzuki's closest friends needed help. Also he was the one at the advantage there. He didn't know how Shimazaki got around, he had never seen him using the stick thing he'd seen blind people use, but he never bumped into things….Miss Suzuki said that it had to do with his powers…well it looked like whatever it was had limits since he was feeling every single box…and opening them…and the whole thing seemed very frustrating for him…and he was one of Miss Suzuki's friends…and that meant that they could be friends too…
And Miss Suzuki had been telling him that she wanted him to be friends with her friends.
"Fuck…where in the hell is it?" muttered Shimazaki as he went through the cabinets. Well that was a cry for help if there ever was one. Friends were supposed to help each other out….and he wasn't friends with Shimazaki yet…and really he was happy just being friends with Miss Suzuki….but she wanted him to be friends with her friends and she liked it when people were good to one another so…
So he would help.
"Um….are you looking for something?" asked Serizawa. He wished that he could have taken that back as soon as he said it. Of course he was looking for something. Serizawa was the one who could see and of course he could see that…and now he wished…he needed to go back to his room. He didn't care if he hadn't finished his…whatever meal it was that he was eating. He needed to go back to his room where he couldn't mess up!
"So you can talk." Said Shimazaki. He didn't turn to face Serizawa….and that made it easier…to say something….but now he had to think up something to say.
"Um….I can?" said Serizawa. He would have kicked himself if he could have. He was so bad at this. Miss Suzuki…it was easier talking to people when she was near. She did enough talking for both of them and that gave him time to think of what it was that he was going to say when he did want to talk…but she wasn't there. She was on the other side of the shared wall with her dad and Sho. He was here…and he would have to do this by himself. He held his umbrella tighter. Holding it…well she had given this to him…she had said that he could be under it and pretend that he was in his room but…well he could hold it and pretend that he was holding her hand, that she was near to him, and that she would keep him safe. From what…well messing up and freaking out…and pretending was almost as good as her actually being there with him.
"You can. You have my permission…not that you needed it but you have it." Said Shimazaki with a wave of his hand. Serizawa nodded.
"Oh…um…alright." Said Serizawa
"Quit shaking like that, I'm not going to hurt you. Mob's orders." Said Shimazaki
"I…I'm not shaking…" said Serizawa. Shimazaki turned around…and Serizawa got the distinct feeling that he was being looked at. Stared at. Sized up. He got that feeling in his colors…aura. He got that feeling in his aura. Maybe Shimazaki could sense auras even though they were light. Serizawa had no idea…and he knew that he couldn't ask…even though he had plenty of questions for him.
Questions that he would have asked if he had been a braver man.
Question like how he got dressed in the mornings and brushed his teeth and showered and shaved if he couldn't see. Questions like how he got around with his powers. Was it like how bats saw? Or like Daredevil? Wait, no, Daredevil saw like a bat…right? He wasn't sure…but he was sure that he wanted to know how it worked…and he was also sure that he couldn't ask questions like that. There were rules when it came to talking to people and Serizawa…well he had never been good at it…but he had never been terrible either….at least not terrible enough to ask intrusive questions and make someone feel different….
That was one of the worst things that you could make a person feel. Different.
"I can tell that you are. What? Am I so terrifying?" asked Shimazaki. Serizawa…well he knew that it was wrong to tell lies…but he also knew that it was wrong to insult people. Especially blind people. Shimazaki might not have known that he was so covered in tattoos…or that they made him look like the bad guy in a yakuza movie…or that the only way to describe his smile was 'devious'….
"No! Not…not at all…um…what are you looking for? Maybe I can help." Said Serizawa. He knew, well he had been warned, by both Hatori and Miss Suzuki that Shimazaki liked to mess with people. He had also been there when Miss Suzuki had told Shimazaki to be nice to him…and he knew that she was technically their boss even though she was so small…so he had no reason to worry about the devious smile that he was getting from Shimazaki. Nothing to worry about at all.
They were all friends here. Miss Suzuki had said so.
"I'm looking for chocolate. Something in here smells like chocolate and I don't know what. Toshi usually labels the kitchen for me but they're exhausted, normal exhausted not Xanned out, so….yeah. Looks like I'm starving to death." Said Shimazaki. Serizawa…well he hadn't broken anything. He was proud of the fact that he hadn't broken anything…though his colors did show a lot…and the light above them burnt out…and Shimazaki did reach up and cover his ears…but nothing broke. He didn't hurt anything or anybody…which was more than he ever could have hoped for before in his life. Miss Suzuki would have been so happy with him…well about the not breaking things or people. She would have been upset if she knew that he had let her friend starve…not that he had any intention at all of doing that. No, that was no way to make friends at all…or keep the one he had.
"N-No! I mean you don't have to. Um…I have chocolate cereal right here. Um….it's in the box in front of me on the table…oh! The table is behind you and to your left…um…do you know what left is?" asked Serizawa. He had no idea how Shimazaki saw the world…so it had been a legitimate question! It had been a real and legitimate question…and also the wrong one, too, if the look that Shimazaki had gotten was anything to go off of.
"I'm blind, not slow, I know what left is." Said Shimazaki. There was a tone to his voice and a feel to him….to his colors…to his aura…and Serizawa knew that he had screwed up. He had done the one thing that he had been trying not to do! Well the second thing. The first thing that he had been trying not to do was explode and hurt people but the second thing that he had been trying not to do was mess up and say the wrong thing…and he had…and he wished that Miss Suzuki had been there!
But she wasn't.
She wasn't there. He was there on his own and he had to own up to what he had done. He had said the wrong thing and now…well now he had to make it right. He had to apologize and then…well maybe apologize a second time. He knew how much it hurt, how bad it felt, to have your differences pointed out like that. Back when he'd been small and people had always asked to touch his hair…and then when he'd been bigger and his powers had showed up…it was the worst, being reminded how different you were…and it must have been even worse for Shimazaki!
Serizawa was a terrible friend…and they weren't even friends yet!
"I-I'm sorry. I just…um…I've never known any blind people before so I didn't know what you…knew. Um the cereal is in the blue box in front of me." Said Serizawa. He wasn't freaking out, that was the important thing, and Shimazaki wasn't freaking out at him…even though it would have been fine if he had. Shimazaki must have felt bad….and it was all Serizawa's fault. Maybe he should have just stayed in his room until Miss Suzuki came and got him. Maybe that would have been better…or something…better for him and better for everyone else.
"I have no clue what 'blue' is." Said Shimazaki shaking his head. He made a sound like he was either laughing or crying…and Serizawa wasn't going to sit there until he figured out which it was! He had to…he had to make this better! He had to make this better before he messed up again!
"Oh no! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" said Serizawa. That may have been too loud…and also now the box of cereal had tipped over and the whole table was covered in it…but maybe that was ok since Shimazaki was laughing now. He was laughing and he walked over and took Serizawa's cereal bowl…well that was ok he could have it if he wanted to…and then he swept some of the cereal off of the table and into the bowl….and that didn't seem very clean. First of all because he was using Serizawa's spoon…and second of all because he had swept that cereal away with his bare arm…and third of all because Serizawa wasn't sure how clean this table was…but he wasn't going to say anything else.
He wondered if he could turn invisible again….but no. Shimazaki knew where he was now.
"You know the polite thing to do, when you apologize, would be to bow." Said Shimazaki through a mouthful of cereal. Serizawa didn't think, he just did it. He got up and bowed and apologized.
"Right! I-I am so sorry for what I said to you and for making you feel bad and-" said Serizawa
"Woah, I didn't think that you would actually do it…heh. Would you kowtow if I asked you to?" asked Shimazaki. Serizawa straightened up and nodded. Of course he would have. He had f-worded up and now he had to apologize. Also this was an important learning experience for him. Now he knew what not to say to a blind person…and also he knew that Shimazaki could tell if he was moving but not colors and stuff. That was good to know for the future.
"Yes, of course. I'm very sorry for what I said to you and for making you feel bad and I would do anything to make it up to you." Said Serizawa. Shimazaki looked up at him with a look…one that he didn't like.
"Anything?" asked Shimazaki with a tone to his voice that made Serizawa regret, just a bit, saying what he had said. He hadn't meant literally anything…or maybe he had. He didn't know. All he knew was that he really wanted to go back to bowing and not to whatever it was that was giving Shimazaki that devious look on his face.
"Yes…anything…um…maybe?" said Serizawa. Shimazaki seemed to be considering something as he chewed on his, well really Serizawa's, cereal. He put the spoon in his mouth and gnawed on it, Serizawa could hear his teeth hitting the metal it was an unpleasant sound, before dropping it back in the bowl and…well he knew that he wasn't being stared at…but he got the feeling that he was.
"You want to help me out with something important?" asked Shimazaki
"Um…yes?" said Serizawa
"Do you promise to help me? And not back out? Even if every fiber of your being is telling you to run away?" asked Shimazaki
"Um…you saying that worries me a little." Said Serizawa. That was…cryptic. That was the sort of line that came before a very long and complicated quest…but this was not a game…and if it had been a game then Serizawa would have waited until he went up a few level before he accepted…whatever it was that he had to accept.
"Relax. I'm not going to fuck you or anything. Well if you wanted to then I would be amenable but-" said Shimazaki. Serizawa gasped and covered his mouth. First of all he had said…well Serizawa had been living with him for long enough to know that it was his favorite word…but still! He had said…the f-word…and he had used it as a verb and not an adjective!
Also he thought that Serizawa wanted to…with him!
Not that he had anything against people who were…like that. He didn't. He just…wasn't like that. Also he didn't want to do that with anyone….well not anyone he knew…and he didn't even know what he would have done if he had wanted to do that with someone he knew. The awkwardness would have killed him. He knew that adults did that, and he knew that he was an adult, but he also knew that the whole thing was just…not for him…not the way he was now…
Not now, not even if someone he liked asked him to, just…now was not the time in his life for all of that.
"I don't! I mean…not with you! I mean…I mean…sorry…this is just…not coming out right." said Serizawa
"Wow. Way to make a guy feel good about himself." Said Shimazaki. Oh no! Serizawa…the last thing he wanted to do was hurt Shimazaki's feelings…or anyone's feelings! Miss Suzuki was going to be so mad at him…and he didn't know what he would do if she was mad at him. She was his only friend. She was his best friend. She took care of him. If she stopped liking him…if hs egotmad enough to not like him anymore…then he had no idea what he would do.
"I…I'm sorry…I didn't mean to make you feel-" said Serizawa
"Well you did and now you owe me a favor and you did say that you would do anything…" said Shimazaki
"I…I did say that…" said Serizawa
"Good. So…you ever clean out someone's eye sockets for them before?" asked Shimazaki
"I….what? Eye…sockets?" asked Serizawa
"Yeah, eye sockets. See?" asked Shimazaki. He opened his eyes and…and Serizawa didn't know where to look. It would have been rude to stare but it would have been even ruder to look away…but he didn't want to stare…and also he couldn't look away.
"I…see…" said Serizawa. He could see…well then…that was…he wondered if it hurt. He knew not to ask but he wondered if it hurt him at all. It seemed like it would hurt.
"So, you want to be a friend and clean them out for me?" asked Shimazaki. Serizawa took a step back into the table…but then did his best to calm down. Make more friends…Miss Suzuki had told him to make more friends…so that was what he was going to do now. He was going to make a new friend…he was going to help Shimazaki out…and he was not going to freak out. Even though this was kind of…really f-wording scary…and also he had no idea how to even…but he could learn…
You were supposed to help out your friends.
"I…yes. I can do that…for you…since we're friends…" said Serizawa. Shimazaki got another devious look on his face, Serizawa wondered if that was just how he looked normally, before he took the bowl of cereal and drank everything down like mom had said, years ago, was very impolite. Not that Serizawa was going to say anything, friends didn't correct each other like that, and also…well he had just seen something even more disturbing than that.
"Great! Now come on, before Toshi wakes up and tells me to stop fucking with you!" said Shimazaki. He got up from his chair, grabbed Serizawa, and then the next thing he knew he was in the bathroom…and he wanted to run away…but he didn't. He just held his umbrella in his hands as Shimazaki explained all of the steps, the very complicated steps, to what he needed Serizawa to do. He wasn't going to run away, even if he wanted to, because he had made his new friend a promise…one which he would keep. Because that was how friends…were. Serizawa had never imagined that friendship would involve cleaning out someone's eye sockets for them…but then again he had never had a friend before. Now he had two. He had two friends and one of them needed his help…which he gave to the best of his ability….
And, really, the whole thing went better than he had thought it would have.
