Family dinners usually consisted of three people…but tonight there were four.
There, sitting at his table, was another man. His name was Serizawa Katsuya, he was twenty seven years old, and he was Shigeko's new friend. Hatori's too, actually, and apparently a good potential friend for Suzuki as well. That was what Hatori had said. Suzuki had no idea if he wanted to be friends with anyone else, he had two friends now which was one more friend than he had ever planned on making in his life, and three…well three might have been too maybe. The group, and there was a group now, would have been an even number and even numbers were his favorites…
But Serizawa Katsuya was…a lot.
Suzuki quickly drained just a bit of energy from him. Just enough the calm the storm that was his aura. Suzuki had been living beside this man for a month now…and it had been like having a low level head ache constantly. Just…there. At the back of his head was this man and the constant never ending state of panic that he seemed to be in. Like now. Right now. Suzuki had no idea what he was so panicked about.
It was just dinner.
"Does everyone like dinner? I made the whole thing by myself…well Shibata taught me how. I helped him make dinner for everyone next door and then I came here and made this…and stuff." Said Shigeko. Suzuki poked at his food with his fork. Truth be told fish and chips was maybe one of those foods best gotten from the outside world. The fish somehow had too much batter on one side and not enough on the other, the fries we far too thick, and the mushy peas were just…too mushy. Also Shigeko maybe hadn't had to serve it to them in a newspaper…
But he loved Shigeko more than anything else in the world so he would not be saying any of those things to her.
"This is wonderful, Shigeko, I can see that you put a lot of effort into it." Said Suzuki. Objectively it was not wonderful but…well it was subjective. Someone must have found it wonderful. Someone, somewhere, in this world must have enjoyed the meal that his Daughter slaved over a hot stove to make. He would never criticize her cooking, or anything about her, because she was his and he loved her so very much…
Even if, in the kitchen at least, she was no Masami.
"Is this enough?" asked Sho as he held up his plate. His barely picked at plate. He had been sitting there making faces and picking at his fish and chip, newspaper covered, plate like this was something inedible in front of him. He had seen the Boy eating pure sugar straight from the bag. He had seen the Boy stick gum under chairs to chew for later. He had seen the boy drink ranch dressing from a glass like it was ketchup or something! How could he just sit there and pick at the meal that his sister had gone through the trouble of cooking with her own two hands in front of a hot stove-
He would not say anything.
He would not tell the Boy that he was being ungrateful. He was not going to get up and smack the Boy across the back of the head and tell him to act like a human being. He would not tell the Boy that he didn't care if he sat there and wasted away to nothing but he would not let him sit there and insult his sister's cooking. He would say nothing and do nothing. Shigeko had made herself perfectly clear, she could handle it, even though it didn't seem like she was handling it at all.
"A few more bites, alright?" said Shigeko. So made a face at her and then got back to moving his food around on his plate. If Suzuki had been in his Son's shoes, well socks since they were indoors now, his father would have told him to stop pushing his food around and to choke it down even if he didn't like. Suzuki would have been imprisoned at that table all day, all night, and then into the next day until he ate. All the while mother would have either been banging pots and pans in the kitchen, shouting to herself in the living room, or crying in her bedroom because her family didn't appreciate her. Father would have been so angry that he-
Well now that was an odd thing to remember.
He hadn't thought about his old family dinners in years. He hadn't thought about how he had been so small and he had been forced to eat…things. Things which he had barely been able to keep down. Mother, for all of her talk about slaving over a hot stove, hadn't been much of a cook. Not like Masami. She had been able to make everything taste good, even foods which were sticky and…just…there were some things which he just could not have in his mouth. Sticky and goopy and sweet and…well he hated meat with gravy…and he hated….well he hated a lot of things….so he understood Son in that way…
But he didn't understand why he didn't just get up and leave the table. Suzuki had given him that freedom.
"Fine…but not the peas. I don't like peas." Said Son. He poked at them with his powers…and he could understand it. There was something about food like that, food textured like that, that was difficult to get down. Still, though, Shigeko had worked very hard on this and he shouldn't have been such an ingrate and if he wasn't going to eat at the table then he could eat in his closet and he wasn't coming out until his plate was clean and-
Well he wasn't going to be doing that.
He had always hated that. When father hadn't been home to tell mother to go calm down. When mother had grabbed him by the arm and locked him in his closet…well not locked, there were no locks on any of the doors in his childhood home, and also he could have easily broken out…but he didn't. He wouldn't have done that to mother, not on purpose, and that time when he had sent her hurling into his wall….well that had been an accident…he hadn't meant to hurt her…but he had and then…well she had never made him eat in his closet again…
His Son should have been grateful that his family was so permissive.
"Just a few bites so that you can be healthy." Said Shigeko. She was so good to him in that way. She was good to everyone. Her brother who acted like a child, her friend who was clinging to her like a child, and her father who was not going to act like a child. Suzuki was a grown man and he could have just pushed his plate away and made himself some ketchup bread like he wanted…but that would have been rude…rude and also he would have set a terrible example for his Son…and he would have been ungrateful towards his Daughter…and he would never have treated her like that.
If he wouldn't have treated Masami like that then he wouldn't have treated Shigeko like that either.
"Fine….one bite?" asked Son. He had done that to his mother, too. Just one bite. Suzuki had just left him be. He didn't understand trying to force someone to eat something that they didn't want to. He didn't understand Shigeko. She should have just left him to eat some more of his breakfast pastries like he liked. He didn't say anything, though, Shigeko knew more about child rearing than he did.
"Three bites." Said Shigeko. She held up three fingers just in case Son had forgotten the meaning of the word 'three'. Her friend seemed to not be able to tell that she was not directing her words at him. He was eating his food and looking over at her. Suzuki wasn't the best with people but it seemed to him that her friend was looking towards her for approval. He knew that look. People gave him those looks all the time. Not his own Son, for some reason, but others. It was good that Shigeko was getting those sorts of looks. She deserved them.
"Two bites?" asked Son. He held up two fingers just in case his older sister had forgotten the meaning of the word 'two'. Shigeko should have, in Suzuki's opinion, started up higher. When you negotiated you started up high and then the other people started down low and then you met in the middle. That was the way to negotiate…well everything. Not that Suzuki still negotiated. He was the President now. His word was law. Shigeko's word should have been law too but she negotiated….maybe because she was a woman.
They tended to be…nicer…like that.
She was certainly nice. Pleasant. She was a nice and pleasant person much like Masami had been. She had never been like his mother. She had always negotiated with Son, too, and Shigeko when she had been smaller and more picky. His own mother would have been rolling over in her grave if there had been enough of her to bury. No, what little had been left of her and father had been cremated….and he had no idea why he was thinking about this. About them. About the life he's had with them. They were dead and he was forty four, forty five in March, and…and there was no point in thinking about the family which he'd had.
He was a grown man, now, and he had his own family...plus one newcomer….who Suzuki was not going to say anything to even though his aura was clinging to Shigeko's…
"Fine….but big kid bites, not baby bites." Said Shigeko. She sighed as she said that and poked at her own food. Her friend's aura poked at hers. She looked over at him and smiled. He smiled back to her. Suzuki…was not going to flip this table over and kill anyone…or beat them terribly…or beat them a little…or kick them. He was just going to eat his food and keep his mouth shut…
Well metaphorically, obviously.
"Alright…and I'm sorry if I messed up dinner, guys. I did what Shibata showed me…and I didn't mean to mess up…" said Shigeko. She was poking at her plate, now, with her fork. She was shredding the newspaper. She was going to get newspaper in her food. She was going to get newspaper in her food and she didn't need to because this was delicious…good…decent…edible. It went down and that was good enough.
"You did a good job with dinner. Feel proud of your accomplishment." Said Suzuki. He didn't know anything about cooking. He had never moved past ketchup bread, instant porridge, and cup noodles. So if he had done this then he would have felt proud because he had made something that approximated a meal. In fact if he had been in her position he would have been incredibly proud of himself. She had made food from country on the other side of the world. She knew how to make Japanese food, she had mastered tempura and omurice and at that point there was nothing left to master, so it made sense that she wouldn't have been good at this…and she was good at this! She was good at everything!
She was Suzuki Shigeko and she was the most perfect person who had ever entered his life…well she was tied with Masami….
"You really think so, dad?" asked Shigeko
"Yes. Those are my feelings towards this meal and I know that everyone sitting here feels the same." Said Suzuki. They had better have felt the same. People would like what he told them to like and people would enjoy what he told them to enjoy and if anyone at that table, in the world, had a different opinion then he would put them in the ground.
"He-he's right! I mean your dad, father, is right…this is very good. I've never had this before and…and I like it a lot. You're a very good cook, Miss Suzuki, you're good at everything." Said Shigeko's friend who Suzuki didn't even want to know the name of. His fork bent in his hand. How dare he…well he had complimented Shigeko…but how dare he compliment Shigeko! Wait, no, that was a good thing and…and he loved his Daughter and he knew that she had friends and he knew that her friends thought the world of her, they had better, and also…also this was just the latest in the string of her friends and…well Hatori liked him…
And he trusted Hatori's judgement.
He trusted Shigeko's new friend and…and he trusted that she wouldn't…well she was only eleven but…well she was at that age. She getting older and she was old enough to have feelings for people and…well most of her friends were male so she would choose from her friends and….and he wanted her to be happy and…and of course she would have done better than the man sitting beside her…though he was tall and maybe if he shaved and combed his hair and…well he was…Suzuki straightened his fork and went back to eating.
He did not have the mental space to deal with all of that…whatever it was…right now.
"Yeah it's pretty good…but next time just go to the place that we always go to." Said Son
"Don't speak that way to your sister." Said Suzuki. He didn't raise his voice, he didn't tip the boy out of his chair and he didn't send him flying into the wall. He showed more restraint than the Boy deserved and hopefully Shigeko would not be upset with him. She had warned him that she would walk out on him…like Masami had…but that was only if he struck the Boy or didn't accept the one in a trillion chance that he was…the way Suzuki had long suspected that he was…so he didn't need to worry about Shigeko leaving him….
So then why was he worried?
"What? The fish and chips place does it for a living so of course it would be-" said Son. Suzuki held his tongue. He had seen Shigeko's aura…and she was displeased…and if she was displeased with him then she would go…she would leave him…and then he would have been without her…and he didn't know what he would do if he had to be without her. If he woke up and she was gone….then he would have been alone…and he knew that it was wrong to fear being alone….he knew that he had to be a full and complete person all on his own…
But he also knew that he loved Shigeko more than anything else in this world.
"Stop it, dad, Sho didn't mean anything by that…so stop it. Sho's right, it is better from the place, and maybe I should have just gone there…and don't say anything else mean. You're scaring Serizawa. You know that he's fragile." Said Shigeko. She patted her friend on the hand…and Suzuki smoothed down the flares of his aura. Suzuki's own aura…well he took in the energy that he could….and he did his best to stay calm. He did his best to take in the energy and….he so hated doing this when he didn't have to…especially for someone this powerful…
He hadn't felt anything this powerful, anyone this powerful, since meeting Shigeko all those years ago…and he had no idea how to feel about all of this.
"I…fine." Said Suzuki. There was too much to feel right then. There was the Boy and his tantrum and Shigeko and her friend…and the affection that she showed him…but that was just her way. That was just how women were. They were affectionate towards the people that they cared about and…and she was only eleven years old and…and she was not at that age yet. Well she was at the age at which she would notice the opposite sex but not old enough to do something about it….right?
Suzuki did not want to think about now.
"See? I know about stuff!" said Sho. The Boy was throwing a tantrum now…and he chose to focus on that. He chose to focus on that and not the way that Shigeko's hand rested on top of her friend's….she was just doing that because he was even more emotionally fragile than Hatori. She was focused on him…and her brother. She was focusing on her brother too and that was…he had never been more grateful for one of the Boy's tantrums than he was now….
What had become of him?
"Sho!" said Shigeko. What was the matter with him? He was HAPPY that the Boy…well not happy but…well glad. He was glad that his Son was pitching a fit…and that made no sense. His Son was being a brat…and he should have been upset but…well it took his sister's attention off of the man beside her…and he knew her. He knew that she didn't have those sorts of feelings for that man and…and he just…
He needed to just eat his dinner already….and put a stop to this too.
He had to just…get back to…maybe a silent dinner? Or maybe just…he didn't know. Son was Son and he knew his Son and he knew that his Son would just keep on running his mouth and sharing his opinions and…and he had his right to them. Suzuki wanted to smack those opinions out of his mouth but…well he had to be…different. Shigeko wanted him to be nicer so maybe…he could just…talk to his Son like…
Well not like he wanted to…not like the Boy deserved.
"Son, be quiet. You…you do know about things…well…if you have such strong opinions on British food then share them with your girlfriend when she decides to cook for you. Otherwise be silent. Your sister is not British and has done her best with their food and her best now, as always, is more than good enough." Said Suzuki. There. He had said his piece and he had made perfectly logical sense and this was his Son and if any human being on this earth would have been able to appreciate it then it would have been the human being that he had made himself.
Well…it would have made sense…but his Son so rarely made sense.
"I…I…don't talk about my girlfriend! I'm going to…to…to have dinner…in my room! And stop talking about my girlfriend!" said Son. He took his plate, got up, and left. The whole time Shigeko's aura seemed…well she seemed…upset? Maybe because her friend was so clinging to her now. His hand was clinging to hers and his aura was clinging to hers…and also he was clutching an umbrella for reasons that Suzuki just…did not understand.
There was a lot happening that he just did not understand.
"Dad…why'd you have to do that? I said to be nice." said Shigeko
"What? I was nice. He can share his opinions with his girlfriend when she becomes his wife since she'll be the one cooking for him." said Suzuki. There was a moment of silence between him and his Daughter there. Her aura was focused on his now and his was focused on hers and…it seemed like she had something to say and…and it seemed like she also didn't and…well the only thing that she could do now was break the silence…because Suzuki didn't know what more he could say.
But neither of them were the ones who broke the silence.
"He's going to marry his girlfriend? Wow….I'm so happy for him!" said Shigeko's friend. He did seem happy, well his aura did, and…well he had every reason to be happy. The Boy had found his most perfect person at the age of ten and now, if he played his cards right, he could have had sixty or seventy years with this little girl…and Suzuki knew that he should have agreed but…well he didn't trust himself to speak. The only words that would have come out of his mouth were something along the lines of 'my Daughter had better not have been your most perfect person' and then a list of the terrible things that he would have done to Serizawa if Shigeko had been his most perfect person…
Yes, it was better if he just sat down and ate and kept his thoughts to himself.
"We all are, Serizawa, we all are. I don't know what Sho's so embarrassed about…but we shouldn't talk about this. How was everyone's day?" asked Shigeko. She took her hand from her friends, and Suzuki had no idea that it was even possible for himself to feel so relieved, and she addressed that question to the table. Suzuki could tell that she had addressed it to the entire table…but her friend took it upon himself to answer her…
Wasn't he supposed to be shy?
Hatori had said that her new friend was so shy that the only way to speak to him was to speak to him through the walls. Hatori…well he had said that weeks ago when they had first met…and of course Shigeko would have helped her friend make progress…but still! He was just…did he have to be so close to her? Did he have to speak to her so much? Did he have to just…be…there…in the same room as Shigeko?!
Calm. Down. Touichirou.
"Mine was good…um mostly I think…um…well I spent it with you…um…how was your day?" asked Shigeko's friend.
"My day was good too. I spent it with you too…so maybe it wasn't the best question." Said Shigeko. She laughed a little when she said that….and she just…she had no reason to laugh. She had no reason to laugh to her friend like that. If she wanted to laugh then they could have laughed together the two of them…well he didn't know how to laugh actually…but for her he would try…well he would have tried and…and he got the distinct feeling that he was losing control…even though his powers were in check…
"No, no, it was a good question, all of your questions are good questions…and….um…you haven't asked your dad yet. I meant your father." Said Shigeko's friend. Suzuki…did not want to be addressed by this man as anything and…well he needed to calm down. He needed to remind himself that Shigeko was not interested in this man and…and Hatori had vouched for him….and maybe Hatori was the one who was interested in him. There. That would have been….well Hatori could have done much better than him. He could have gotten someone like Fukuda even…someone pleasant and intelligent…someone who always knew just what to say…and now he just….
His fork bent in half.
"Do you want to try asking him?" asked Shigeko. She didn't noticed him reach over into the drying rack with his powers and get a new fork. He didn't know if it was good, she hadn't seen him losing control, or bad, since she was so absorbed in another man….and he just…needed a moment to process all of this.
"I…I'm not ready…sorry." said Shigeko's friend.
"That's ok. You came out here and had dinner with me and my family and that's a lot for you. Maybe next time you'll be ready to talk to people who aren't me. It's not hard, here, watch me. Dad, how was your day?" asked Shigeko. Suzuki…got the feeling that he was losing control…without actually losing control…and he just…well he wasn't thinking. It seemed like it would have been a good idea to go and get the Boy just so he could throw another tantrum and just…take Suzuki's mind off of things….but that would have been a bad idea but…well he was running out of good ideas…
He needed space.
"It was…a normal day…..I worked…I…am going to eat my dinner in my room. Good day." Said Suzuki. He got up, took his plate with him, and walked to his room. He walked to his room, put his plate down on his dresser, and then just…sat down at his bed. He sat down at his bed and just…looked up. He looked up at the ceiling and just…collected himself. He just…
He had to collect himself.
He loved Shigeko and he just…he wanted her to be happy and…and maybe he was just being…for the past thirty years of his life Fukuda had been telling him that he was overly dramatic. Maybe he was. Maybe he was just…making something out of nothing. She'd had feelings before, Shigeko, for men. She'd had feelings for Hatori…which made perfect sense since Hatori was a very pleasant person, but Hatori was a homosexual but her new friend…well Suzuki hadn't asked…and he knew better than to ask…but he might have been…and the thought of it was just…it was good. The thought of her new friend being a homosexual and not a potential romantic partner…since she was so young and small and…well Suzuki wasn't young or small but…
He wasn't ready for…four seats at the table…not at all.