Disclaimer: I am not now and never have been a member of the HP fan club.
Chapter 4: The New Headmaster
Since accessing the power of the Prefect's Badge Dobbie's powers seemed to know no limits.
His appointment as GobWarts Headmaster was surely conclusive evidence of this. The Min. of Maj. was powerless to intervene. The whole of the wizarding & witchie world appeared to have gone over to the Dark Arts lock, stock and two smoking bladdersworth. (AN "And about time too!" I hear you say, dear reader. How many HP diatribes have there been where the boring 'goodies' always come out on top? At last a story with some reality not to mention great literary style.)
"Come, McWink." ordered Dobbie. (AN Actually, at the risk of some digression, things had moved on so much in JR-world that our hero, Dobbie, was now referred to by all and Saturday as the " Enlightened Living Fantastico Indomitable & Enigmatic" or ELFIE for short.)
"Here I am, Oh ELFIE." whimpered and snivelled McWink. (AN In fact she had turned into a whimpering and snivelling jellymessy ever since her runaway marriage to the Scottish Highlands two years previously. It was from this time that she had become addicted to Warlock Haggis and had insisted they were served as Dish of the Day everyday the Pigsmeade Pub much to the disgruntlement of the locals who were getting heartily fed up of this dish but did not dare express their thoughts in fear of a deadly reaction from the mighty McWimp. Already she had turned the ferrymaster into a life sized tartancloth version of Britney Spears, so small wonder everyone was afeared.)
"Here's what I want you to do, McWink." spoketh Dobbie in a confidential manner "You must go into the Great Hall of PigsWorth and bring me back the head of master POTTER. You will find him doing HiMyonnie's homework. HiMyonnie is off courting Goil so she'll be tied up for hours. The coast will be clear enough and POTTER will give you no trouble – his obstructive powers are all but spent. Ha Ha Ha! Now, be off with you! Oh, and no dropping off at the Pub for Warlock Haggis or I'll have your head displayed on a plate. BE GONE!"
Now it may have been that McWink would never have thought about going to the Pub if Dobbie had not mentioned it, as it was, she certainly made a bee-line for the pub as soon as she was out of sight of ELFIE.
"Sixteen pints of Pigsworth Special Ale (PSA) she ordered and a Dish of the Day, NOW!" she snivelled and whimpered in a loud voice.
Soon she was scoffing Haggis, with an extra helping of hag on the side, and was so engrossed in quaffing her beer that she never noticed THE CREATURE that slid in through the pub door and seated itself in the farthest, darkest, dirtiest, foulest, stickiest, stinkiest, tackiest, smelliest, cornflackiest corner of the pub.
Who is THE CREAURE? Does this spell the end for McWink? Could you do 16 pints of PSA in one sitting? Will Chapter 5 provide all answers? Find out tomorrow.
AN- Thankyou for reading please review!