Mob got the feeling that Sho was not the one who had been stealing from her.
She knew because her stuff had still gone missing despite him being gone. There, between her mattress and her box spring, was nothing. Well not nothing, she had the books she borrowed from Minegishi without asking there as well as her lighter and the pipe that Shimazaki had gotten her. She used to have spare pens there, and flour, and a cigarette case too. Well the cigarette case was still there but there weren't any cigarettes in it anymore.
Which was weird.
Sho was the only one who would have had any reason to steal from her. She hardly ever let him smoke with her, he needed more moderation than she did because he didn't need to control his powers, so that was the perfect reason for him to steal from her….but he hadn't been stealing from her. He was gone. He was still in England. Yes, her stuff had gone missing in England but also in Amsterdam, where they had just been, and Oslo where they were now. Sho had been gone for weeks and weeks now…and so had her stuff.
Which meant that Sho hadn't been the one who had been stealing from her.
The list of suspects was a short one. There was Shimazaki and…well Shimazaki. He liked to steal things. He said that he didn't see why he couldn't just take things that didn't belong to him…even though that was stealing and stealing was wrong. He had done a lot of wrong things in his life, he had said, so stealing didn't even register. She couldn't think of anyone else to add to her list of suspects….so it must have been him….but he had no motivation….
But this was Shimazaki. He didn't even understand why he did the things he did so how could she?
Mob put her mattress back down and sighed. Good thing she had kept some stuff in her Elsa bag. She was getting tired of wearing this thing all the time but she had to. There was no other way to keep her stuff from getting stolen. She'd have to ask Shimazaki later, without accusing him because that would be mean, why he kept on stealing from her. He had better stuff than she did. He still had a bunch of coke, not the soda, left over from his birthday and plenty of sugar cubes and mushrooms and pens and flower. He had no reason to steal from her…
But, again, this was Shimazaki she was talking about.
This was what it was. Sometimes things were what they were and there was no reason to get upset over them. Like how Sho was gone. He was gone and he was having fun with his girlfriend so she couldn't do anything like call him and ask him to come back because this room was too big without him and the house was too quiet….he was with his girlfriend and he loved her and she couldn't make him come back. That was something that she couldn't change. She couldn't change dad either. He was in the bath now, he had been taking long baths lately, and when he came out he would want to hang out with her and…well she loved her dad. She wanted to go next door and have a sleepover with Minegishi but….well dad needed her….and it was what it was.
Everything was what it was.
Like the joint in her hand was what it was. It was from in her Elsa bag. It was bent, and kind of squished, because she kept it in a makeup bag….but it was still good. It hadn't broken apart and that was what mattered. She didn't want to have to make another one. She just wanted to smoke and just…smoke. That was all.
It made her feel better.
She couldn't change what she felt, what she wanted, what could and could not happen…but she could make herself feel better. She found her lighter at the bottom of her Elsa bag. Somehow Shimazaki knew that this was blue. He was the one who had gotten this for her. He got her things sometimes. She didn't know why, probably because they were friends and he liked to steal, and she liked it. It was nice to have someone thinking of her…a friend. He was a really good friend.
Even if he did maybe steal from her.
"Come on…please work…" said Mob as she tried to flick her lighter on. This was a new one. Shimazaki had gotten her a new one. The old one had been white, which was bad luck Minegishi had said, and this one was blue. She liked blue and she had said that she liked blue….and he had remembered that he liked blue. She would have do something later for him, something nice….
Like a surprise wedding!
Those were things that happened and he wanted to be married to Minegishi. She could tell. He said that he wanted to spend his whole life with them and that was what marriage was. It was when two people stayed together for their entire lives. Like her mom and dad…well not her mom and dad…other people who were married. Like Sho and Emmy. They were going to get married and be together forever and then they'd have babies and they'd let Mob play with them…and their babies could be friends with Shimazaki and Minegishi's babies. That was what married people did, they had babies, and if she threw a surprise wedding for Minegishi and Shimazaki then all of her….all of their….dreams would come true!
And then she could plan one for Shimazaki and Hatori…and then she could find a girlfriend for Serizawa….and then she could find a girlfriend for Fukuda….
Fukuda could find his own girlfriend. She didn't know any girls who would like him. She didn't know a lot of people but…well she could find someone for Serizawa much easier than she could for Fukuda. Serizawa was nice. He may have been kind of a scaredy cat…and he didn't have the hang of shaving yet….and also sometimes he forgot to take baths and brush his teeth…and he cried for no reason….and he wore crocs and Minori said that crocs were the worst kind of shoes in the world…even though they were comfortable….even with all of his flaws it would have been a million times easier to find someone for Serizawa than Fukuda.
He was nice.
He was nice, one of the nicest people in the world. He always let her win at games even though he was better than her at pretty much every single videogame ever made. Also he was tall. He was taller than Shimazaki when he stood up straight. He didn't smell good like Shimazaki did though but you got used to him. Also his hair was soft and it fluffed up when you pushed it down…like little clouds and stuff…she'd never seen hair like his before in her entire life. It was cool. He was cool…well not cool-cool but she thought that he was cool. Also he was friends with dad and that was really good. If he could make friends with dad then he could be friends with anyone and being able to make friends with the people in your life was a good thing for a boyfriend to do and stuff….so he would be a very good boyfriend to someone.
She just had to meet a girl and then set him up with her and then he could be happy and all of her friends and family would be with other people.
"Yes!" said Mob as she finally got her lighter to light. It had been sitting in her bag for too long, that must have been it. She lit the end of her joint and inhaled as deep as she could…maybe too deeply. She hadn't been smoking real flower that often. Pens were easier to smoke without people noticing and they didn't make the room smell bad…but her pen was on the charger. She had no other choice….not that she minded this.
It burned going down but it was the kind of burn that she could get used to.
That she was used to…or she had been. She didn't want her tolerance to go too far up but…well she still wanted to be able to smoke. She wasn't going to use moderation tonight, Shimazaki had rolled this and he didn't roll them as thin as she did even though he had to use two papers when she only needed one. She knew that Minegishi was going to be mad at her for not using moderation but….well they were at home in their own bed asleep right now and…well what they didn't know couldn't hurt them…and she wasn't hurting anyone anyway.
Well she was making the house smell weird….but that wasn't so bad.
The room was starting to get smoky…or maybe it was her imagination. She didn't know. Maybe she should have opened a window….but then the rain would have gotten in. The rain and the cold. It was going to be rainy and cold for the whole season. This was the rainy season in Norway…and also the cold season. She couldn't wait until they moved again. Minegishi didn't like it here, it was too cold and not enough plants were awake, and she wanted Minegishi to be happy….and maybe Minegishi would have been happy smoking with her….but then they would have told her to use moderation…and she didn't want to do that.
She just wanted to smoke.
She wanted to smoke but she also….well she wanted to smoke with someone. It was always more fun with someone else. That way she would have had someone to talk to and laugh with and stuff. Like if she had been with Shimazaki then she could have told him that her socks felt good and then he would have told her that she always said that…and that was funny…and then they would have traded socks like they did that one time….and he had stretched her sock out really bad…and Minegishi had said that they were acting ridiculous….and then Sho had been mad at her when he found out…..which made sense since Sho was in love with Shimazaki…however that worked.
She wanted to ask him.
She wanted Sho to have been there sitting on the other side of the room, on his bed even though this room only had the one bed in it for her, and she would have even smoked with him while she asked. That way he might have been more opened to telling her how his heart worked. How he could have been in love with two people at once. She used to be in love with Hatori, before she did that incredibly stupid thing, and while she had been in love with him she hadn't even thought about any other boys. Not even that boy she kissed….she sort of missed him…even though she didn't know him. She had even been in love with him…without even having had known him. She just knew that he was called Hanazawa Teruki and he had blond hair and blue eyes and he was an esper like her and he had gotten accidentally captured and she had betrayed dad by setting him free….and also she knew that Hanazawa Teruki was a really good kisser…well she thought so, anyway, since he had been the only person that she had ever kissed…and ever would kiss since she didn't know any boys at all her own age….but that was ok. The people she loved most in the whole world had people they were in love with and that was god enough for her.
Even her own little brother!
She had no clue whatsoever how his heart worked….well that was normal for her, she had never been able to get a clue, but…well when it came to Sho she really didn't have the first clue. She knew that sometimes boys liked other boys, most of the love stories in the manga underneath Minegishi's bed had boys being in love with other boys, and she knew that it made sense for Sho to be in love with Shimazaki. He was tall and he smelled good and his tattoos were cool and he felt good to hug and he was nice….most of the time…and also he acted like a crazy person and Sho liked that…so it made sense for Sho to be in love with Shimazaki….even though he was also in love with Emmy.
How could he be in love with two people at once?
Some people liked both. Shimazaki liked both and so did Minegishi….but Shimazaki was bi and Minegishi was…something else that she couldn't remember the name of…but it also meant that they liked both…so maybe Sho was one of those things. She had never asked him. She wanted to, though, she really did. She wanted to know how his heart worked even though it was none of her business. Hearts were very private things and….well it didn't matter since he already had someone he was planning on marrying. He loved Emmy and when they grew up they were going to get married and then Sho would move away….far away…and then she'd be all alone…
Like now.
She'd be alone in their room smoking and he would be off ruling the world with his family and…and it would be her and dad. Her and dad and….well he and dad could smoke together….but no. Dad got really weird when he got high….and so did Sho…but Sho was a better kind of weird and….and she didn't even want to get high with him but…but she did want him to be there with her and….and she just….she wished that Sho would just come back from England already! She wished that he would just…just….just come back! He had his whole life to be with Emmy! They only had so much time together before they grew up and he got married and left her all alone and she wished that he would just come back and-
And maybe she wished too hard.
She dropped her joint onto the rug. It didn't catch fire, thankfully, but it did go out….but that was ok. It was pretty much just a roach at this point. Even if it wasn't she wouldn't have cared. Her phone was ringing…and that was Sho's ringtone. Everyone had their own ringtone….nobody ever called her but they all had their own ringtones….and that one was Sho's! He was calling her! She pulled her phone off the charger with her powers…and pulled a little too hard. The charger was still attached but….well that didn't matter. Nothing mattered, not anymore.
Sho was calling!
"Sho! I'm so happy to hear from you! I missed you so much!" said Mob. She…maybe should have hit the green button. That maybe would have been the right thing to do. She took the phone away from her ear and pushed the green button. It had been so long since anyone had called her that she had forgotten how to answer the phone….she had forgotten…
Somehow she had forgotten!
"Big sis? What're you laughing at?" asked Sho. Mob stopped laughing….well she did her best to stop laughing. Right. She had to talk to Sho….she could talk to Sho! She could talk to Sho and he had called her…and he never called her…but she could hear his voice again!
"I forgot how to answer the phone…but that's ok! I figured it out!" said Mob. She covered her mouth to keep from laughing….and that just made her laugh some more.
"What? How did you forget how your phone worked? Even dad knows how his phone works and he can't even do Netflix on his own." said Sho. Mob shook her head and buried her face in her knees. She had to stop laughing…but….but….that was no funny!
"It's true! Dad doesn't know how Netflix works! You're so funny Sho! You've been gone for so long that I forgot how funny you were!" laughed Mob
"I'm not that funny….were you smoking again?" asked Sho
"Um…yes….a lot." Said Mob
"….with Shimazaki?" asked Sho. There was something in his voice…and Mob didn't need to be some kind of clue having person to know that he was upset with her…and he had every reason to be upset with her.
"No! I would never…well I would but not the way you think! I'm not in love with him and I would never-" said Mob. No. Her little brother could not think that she was some kind of boyfriend stealer! Not that Shimazaki was Sho's boyfriend….but he was Minegishi's boyfriend and she would never have stolen Sho's boyfriend or Minegishi's boyfriend or anyone's boyfriend! Cheating was wrong!
"Not so loud! Do you want dad to hear you?!" said Sho
"Of course not…and he's taking a bath anyway. I'm in our room…or I guess that it's my room now…I mean it'll always be our room even if you don't live here anymore…and I wished that you still lived here and I miss you so much!" said Mob
"I miss you too….big sis…even if you were smoking without me…and I'm sorry that I was pissed off at you before. I know that you don't like Shimazaki like that….I mean I don't know why you don't like him like that but I know that you don't like him like that…and I shouldn't have been an asshole like that." Said Sho
"Sho, no, you aren't an a-word. You're my little brother. Sometimes you can be sort of mean but I deserved it there. You thought that I was after the boy you were in love with. I would have been upset if you had been after the boy that I was in love with….I mean I don't have anyone that I'm in love with but if I did then I know that you wouldn't go after him…but just to be safe we should be careful to never fall in love with the same boy." Said Mob
"Can you maybe be quiet about that? Dad might come out of the bath and hear you…and Shimazaki might hear you too if he's awake yet." Said Sho
"He's maybe going to bed now. It's still nighttime here, nowhere near time to get up. Is it daytime yet in England? Is Oslo it's seven thirty seven. What time is it in London?" asked Mob
"It's…um…nighttime too….um….anyway! I called you to say sorry." said Sho
"About what? Is this about how you drank the last of my strawberry milk? Because I forgave you for that a long time ago." Said Mob
"What? No, I don't drink that stuff." Said Sho
"Oh. Is this about the time you accidentally used my toothbrush?" asked Mob
"No." said Sho
"Oh. Is it about how my smoking stuff keeps going missing? Because I thought that it had been you doing it but you've been gone for a while. Now I think that it's been Shimazaki doing it….but if you did take from under my bed then-" said Mob
"No! I never stole from you and…and I can't believe that you would ever think that I would!" said Sho
"I don't think that you are. I think that it's Shimazaki who's been doing it. I know that you love him and all but he does steal all the time." Said Mob
"Big sis…please stop talking about how I…feel…about him." said Sho
"Ok." Said Mob. She didn't think that anyone was listening….but she knew how private love was. Especially being in love with someone who you weren't supposed to be in love with. Dad had weird ideas about love, like who could be in love with who, and that was because he was really old. Minegishi had said so. Old people thought that boys had to be in love with girls and stuff…and also stuff about bloodlines.
Dumb stuff that she didn't care about but dad did…so maybe it was best that she kept her mouth shut.
"Thanks. I just wanted to say that….I'm sorry that I was such an asshole to you before. I mean after I stopped hitting you. I promise that I'll stop being an asshole and I'll stop trying to get extra soda and poptarts out of you…and stuff." Said Sho
"Oh. That doesn't bother me but thanks. You're not an a-word, though, little brother. You're the best little brother in the world and I love you so much." Said Mob. She had no idea why he would have thought that about himself…but her thoughts were still kind of fuzzy. Maybe he felt bad about something….but that made no sense. He had nothing to feel bad about. Even if he had hit her for years and years that was ok. She loved him. She loved him even though he'd hit her…and also that he asked her for extra poptart sometimes.
She was his big sister and she would love him no matter what.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I love you too just…I'm sorry! Bye!" said Sho. He said that and then he hung up. She knew how it sounded when a phone was hung up…and that was a weird word because you didn't have to hang up phones anymore because of the future….but….well he had just hung up on her….
"Bye little brother…I love you….but I said that already….bye…" said Mob even though she knew that Sho couldn't hear her anymore. He must have just been in a hurry to talk to Emmy…or hang out with her…or something. Yes. She couldn't feel bad if he was hurrying off to be with his girlfriend. That was a love thing and she could never be upset about love things. She wanted Sho to be in love.
Love was the best feeling in the world.
Sho was getting older and…and they had been together for their entire lives…but now he had someone else to be with. He had a girlfriend and he loved her and…and she was not hurt that he was rushing off to be with her probably. She wanted him to be happy…and she wanted to be happy too. She picked up the joint, well it was a roach now, and lit the end again. She could smoke these if she held them with her powers. Her powers were listening really well, they always did when she smoked, and that was good. With the way she felt now…well her powers wouldn't have been able to listen to her that well…but she was fine. She was fine and she was going to smoke some more…just a little more…
Just so that she could feel better.
She…she wanted her brother back…but she had never really lost him. She still had her brother even though he was back in London. She wanted to call him back and ask him how he'd been, what he'd been up to, if he'd been having fun, if he'd been going to bed at his bedtime, if he'd been eating real food for dinner….but she didn't. She knew what it felt like to be smothered and she was not going to do that to Sho. She knew how dad felt, why he smothered her, how he felt like she was going to leave him and stuff…which was why he always made her promise that she would always be with him…and she would make Sho make no such promise. He loved her and she loved him…and when you loved someone you let them go….no matter how badly you wanted them back….
Even if they hadn't been gone for long.
And she did want Sho back…even though he might have been stealing from her…but that was ok. He was her little brother and she would love him no matter what…and when you loved someone you let them go….
….and you hoped that they came back….you knew that they would come back to you….