I AM GOING TO KILL MY HANDS AND BACK!
Chapter 10 Stalker dude army II
Killa: FINALLY! THE GOLDEN SAUCER!
Kanna: Killa calm down
Alexia: I cant believe Zax,Loz, and Cloud got sick on the way here
Sephiroth: I thought Zax saw Aerith which made him throw up
Kadaj: and Cloud got sick from well...motion!
Yazoo: and I think Loz got sick from seeing a guy with duck tape around his neck and arms eating chicken
Alexia: HOLD ON! A guy with duck tape?
Yazoo: yep
Kadaj: hmmm...Alexia...
Alexia: that better not be...
Kanna: Alexia are you talking about that stalker dude you slashed up in one chapter?
Alexia: yep
Killa: THEN HE MUST BE PRETTY STUPID USING DUCK TAPE! EVERYONE KNOWS DRAGON TAPE IS THE BEST KIND THERE IS! but I prefer cheese tape
Kanna: Killa...cheese tape is a snack made out of cheese
Killa: EXACTLY!
Kadaj: whats wrong with that wolf?
Yazoo: you still dont get it Kadaj?
Kadaj: nope...
Cloud: uuuggghhhh...motion...sickness...( throws up in the small crevice near the save point )
Zax: Aerith...I thought she was dead...no...that wasnt Aerith...
Kanna: ummm...Zax?
Zax: ugh...yeah?
Sephiroth: what did " Aerith " look like?
Zax: well...she had pink hair that looked like tentacles, was wearing pink pink clothes, had purple and pink skin, her arms were legs, her legs were arms, and her eys were pink and purple, AND one eye was bigger then the other...so...so...
Kanna: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THE DREADED PINK!AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! ( takes out the Dualhound which she stole from Loz and hits Zax head repeatedly )
Zax: ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow OOOOOOOWWWWWWW
Sephiroth: that definelty wasnt Aerith Zax
Zax: THANK YOU LORD!
Kadaj: now Loz, what did the guy with duck tape look like?
Killa: he better not have looked like cheese or bacon
Yazoo: bacon?
Kanna: I think I forgot to tell you guys she liked bacon...
Killa: WHERE IS MY CHEESE AND BACON?
Loz: urp...well anywayz...the guy looked liked a drunk beat up hobo with cheap-as-hell duck tape on the neck, arms,and wrists...he was wearing brown ripped rags also...well at least I think it was rags...it was prolly clothes though
Sephiroth: is that your stalker Alexia?
Alexia: yep...I THOUGHT HE WAS DEAD!
Kanna: hopefully Muru didnt make him immortal...
All: oh no ( sigh )
Killa: That stupid dragon...ughhh...too bad I couldnt eat him...but them again I wouldnt want to eat him because his cooking anyway
Kadaj: Muru is just UGGHHHHHH! HE SMELLS SO BAD!
Yazoo: cant we just kill him?
Sephiroth: hes immortal but Kanna can make him un-immortal ( everyone looks at Kanna )
Kanna: what? I NEED A PUNCHING BAG!
All: true...( Muru comes flying in )
Muru: ummmm...why am I getting glares from you guys?
Loz: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR DAMN YOU YOU DAMN DRAGON! ( beats the crap out of Muru )
Alexia: AGGGGGHHHH QUAKE 3 ETERNITY! ( Muru is now forever cursed with Quake 3 )
Muru: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH ( gets shot to a different place )
In Gaia
Zidane: hey whats that dragon thingy in the sky?
Freya: I dont know but it stinks!
Amarant: ummm...its coming this way
Eiko: LETS GET OUT OF HERE!
DamnStupidButtAssBitch ( AKA Steiner ): NOT A CHANCE! PRINCESS GARNET HASNT COME FROM HER BATHROOM BREAK YET!
Quina: WHATEVER IT IS, IT DOESNT COOK GOOD...
Muru: ummm...WANT SOME! ( shows them Marlboro and Great Marlboro stew, I am not going to say anymore ingredients )
All: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ( run away )
Back to the Original Bunch
Cloud: did anyone hear anything?
All: nope!
Zax: seriously Cloud you hallucinate to much...
Cloud: I think it was those carrots I ate...
Yazoo: Carrots are good for your eyes Chocobo pee brain
Cloud: really? no wonder I cant see...im allergic to carrots
Kanna: I think Cloud has really left our world
Alexia: I thought that ever since he got hit by Super Nova
Sephiroth: really? I thought he lost it when he hit himself with Quake 3 four times
Kadaj: why four times?
Sephiroth: he had it equipped to Quadra Magic
Kadaj: oh...
Loz: can we please go in?
At the Entrance
TL: that will be 30,000 gil sir
Yazoo: 30,000 GIL FOR A LIFETIME! I AM NOT GONNA PAY NO FREAKING 30,000 GIL!
TL: but sir...
Sephiroth: IF HE DOESNT WANT TO PAY HE DOESNT HAVE TOO!
TL: but sir its...
Loz: guys are you sure thats not a robot?
Cloud: maybe it is...I bought one when I was chasing Sephiroth...so lets see if it lets me in...( goes up )
TL: that will be 30,000 gil sir!
Cloud: WTF! I ALREADY HAVE ONE!
Tl: that will be 30,000 gil sir!
Killa: YEP IT IS DEFINETLY A ROBOT!
Alexia: LETS CUT IT ALREADY!
Kanna: fine by me! ( cuts the RLs head off )
RL: 30,000 gil...please...( dies )
Cloud: should we clean this up?
Loz: hmm...
All: hmmmm...NOPE! ( everyone goes inside )
Inside the Lobby
Killa: WTF? SLIDES! I AINT NO 1 YEAR OLD!
Sephiroth: deal with it...
Alexia: so where is everyone gonna go?
Kanna: I am heading off to the ride that views the Golden Saucer...that way I can shoot people...see yaz! ( goes down a slide )
Killa: I will be at the Hotel, they better have cheese and bacon ( goes down a slide )
Sephiroth,Loz: we are headed off to the battle arena...( goes down a slide )
Alexia: and what about you Zax,Yazoo?
Zax: Im heading off to the stage, get everything ready...
Alexia: for what?
Zax: IM GONNA HOST A KAROKE CONTEST! I DIDNT GET MY TURN LAST TIME AND NEITHER DID YAZOO!
Alexia: HOLD ON! KAROKE? I MISSED KADAJ AND SEPHIROTH SING?
Zax: yep
Alexia: SHIT!
Yazoo: umm...I will be...
Alexia: Karoke...that should be fun! Hey Cloud where are you going?
Cloud: Chocobo racing
Yazoo: OOOOOoooo YEAH! SINCE I DONT HAVE CHOCOBOS I CAN USE CLOUD AS ONE! WELL IM OFF TO RACE! ( drags Cloud by the hair to Chocobo Racing, sliding down the slide wasnt a good trip )
Alexia: then that means I am going to the Arcade ( goes down a slide )
Zax: this Karoke/club party is going to be a blast! ( goes down a slide )
Kadaj: hmmm...This is going to be fun...( goes to the big ride so he can try to shoot Kanna )
High Up In The Ride With Kanna
Kanna: DAMN! THIS PLACE IS HIGH! ( sees the roler coaster ) Is that Kadaj?
Kadaj: WWWHHHHHHOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOO! THIS IS SO FUN SHOOTING STUFF! ( shoots some tourists and sees Kanna )
Kanna: oh jeez...he has a gun with him...oh no ( ducks )
Kadaj: MAN I ALMOST HIT HER! AARRGGHHH!
Kanna: oh yeah TAKE THAT! ( takes out the Velvet Nightmare : and yes she likes to steal: and starts shooting at Kadaj )
Kadaj: HEY WATCH IT! ( speeds up and fires at Kanna like a maniac )
Kanna: GUN WAR! ( fires at Kadaj and takes out a paintball gun ) MUAHAHHAHAAHAHHA!
Kadaj: oh no a paintball gun...and IT HAS PINK PAINT! NOOOO! ( steals one from a little kid ) YES! PAINT THAT IS PINK AND HAS FLOWER PATTERNS! ( fires at Kanna )
Kanna: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ( fires at Kadaj )
Kadaj: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ( fires at Kanna )
After the Gun War
Kanna: ughhhh...must change
Kadaj: why me?
Kanna: well at least I have water abilities ( casts Waterga on herself and washes the dreaded pink away )
Kadaj: So! ( throws a water dragon scale above him and gets drenched with water ) see I can get clean too!
Kanna: OOOOOOOOOOOoo I like that girls jacket...it has a silver dragon on the back...( steals the jacket and replaces it with her grey one ) YES!
Kadaj: you gonna get in trouble! ( steals a beef jerky stick from a random guy )
Kanna: lets go see how Alexia is doing
Kadaj: oh alright
Where Alexia Is
Alexia: HAH! BEAT THAT PUNK! THATS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU CHALLENGE ME!
Kanna,Kadaj: Alexia!
Alexia: huh oh hey Kanna! hey Kadaj!
Kanna: what are you doing?
Alexia: oh nothing just beating a punk at his favorite game and getting mad at him for trying to steal gil from me
Kadaj: never steal from Alexia
RPK: oh yeah! I bet me and two of my friends can beat you three anyday!
KKA: OH REALLY!
RPK: yes really, guys! lets show these girls we can beat them anyday!
Kadaj: IM NOT A GIRL!
RPK: you sure have hair like one
Kadaj: may I take that one
Alexia,Kanna: sure
RPK: whats the matter wimps? can fight us boys? ( a skinny and fat guy come beside RPK )
Alexia: I call Skinny
Kanna: I call Fat
Kadaj: And I call BitchAss
RPK: WHAT YOU CALL ME?
Kadaj; oh do you have your hearing aids in correctly? I SAID I CALLED YOU A BITCHASS! ( screams in his ears )
RPK: grrrr...GET THEM! ( the Skinny guy charges at Alexia first )
Alexia: you have got to be kidding me...( jumps back and gets into a battle stance )
Alexia unsheathes her two swords and charges energy into them, making them engulf in flames. Charging at the ugly ass skinny hippy ( this skinny guy is wearing 80's clothes and has a afro for petes sake ) she jumps on his back, kicking him on the back of the neck. She then throws her swords at the 80's guy, which pierces through his body. Before the swords completely pierce through, Alexia jumps back in front of the hippy, grabs her swords and sheathes them.Raising her hand, she casts one of her favorites, " QUAKE 3! " and soon the hippy is gone and so is most of the floor.
RPK: WTF?
Alexia: just because I am a girl dont understimate
Kanna: especially since she was trained by Sephiroth
RPK: who?
Kanna: nevermind ( the fat guy charges at her )
Kanna takes out her MuraLoki ( a sword that 5 feet long with two blades at the tip that stretch outward ) and jumps into the air. Fat guy of course tries to jump himself but he is so freaking fat he falls back on his ass.Looking at the stupid guy she moves him so that his butt is facing upwards. Coming down hard, she stabs the sword right in the middle of her target. Electricity runs down the sword and into the body, making it explode to nothing.
RPK: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Kanna: THATS WHAT HAPPENS! I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN STEAL AROUND HERE!
Kadaj: so shall we? ( gives death glares at the stupid punk )
RPK: ummm...I think I hear my mother calling ( tries to run away )
Kadaj: oh no you dont ( grabs the punks shirt collar and casts Ultima on him )
RPK: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ( is now ashes )
Kanna: oh and by the way im not paying for the damage costs
Alexia: neither am I!'
Kadaj: or me lets SPLIT!
Kanna,Alexia: FINE BY US! ( they all run away to Killa )
With Killa at the Hotel
Killa: I TOLD YOU FOR THE 97777777990000007 TIME! LITERALY! I DONT WORK HEAR! THE EARS AND TAIL ARE FAKE!
Kanna:is that Killa I hear?
Alexia,Kadaj: we think so
Killa: HOW CAN YOU NOT HAVE BACON AND CHEESE? EVERYBODY FEARS IT!
Kanna: yep thats Killa for us
Kadaj: I am going to guess that she is mad
Alexia: and since she has ears and a tail and we are in a ghost hotel I am going to guess they think she works here
Kanna: prolly
Killa: UUUGGGHHHH! ( sees the three people ) HEY GUYS! I AM SO FREAKING MAD!
KKA: we noticed...
GHO: do you work here or not?
Killa: NNNNNNOOOO
GHO: fine fine, well your rooms are 7,9,and 2 ( gives Killa the room keys )
Killa: thank you! NOT! ( throws cheese at GHO )
GHO: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! IT BURNS! ( goes back to the ceiling )
Kanna: ummm...Alexia?
Alexia: yeah?
Kanna: is it just me or is that stalker dude here?
Kadaj: really? I see about 10 of them here
Alexia: WHAT? are they on cell phones?
Killa: ummm...yeah
Alexia: dammit
Kanna: wow that guy really is searching for you isnt he?
Alexia: yeah...dont remind me...
Killa: hey guys wanna go see Yazoo and Cloud?
All: YEAH!
Killa: hey Alexia do you have your swords with you?
Alexia: unfortunately no
Kanna: COME ONE COME ALL TO THE WEAPON SHOP!
Sephiroth: Kanna is like a walking weapon shop, thats why we dont have to go to stores
Kadaj: we only go to stores to get food
Yazoo: but mostly clothes
Loz: we can just get the food from hunting and gathering
Alexia: dang...Kanna you have my blades?
Kanna: yep right here! ( gives Alexia her blades )
Killa: now can we go? I heard Yazoo is gonna race!
Alexia: ARE YOU SERIOUS! LETS GO! ( grabs everybody and runs to the chocobo racing )
At Chocobo Square
Yazoo: I would like to race
Esther: ok, which course?
Yazoo: long
Esther: which Chocobo would you like to enter?
Yazoo: ...( thinks of a name for Cloud )...Clawz
Esther: alright, you will be starting in an hour
Yazoo: fine...( walks over to Cloud )
Cloud: you just had to enter didnt you?
Yazoo: of course to torture you after attacking us that night
Cloud: huh?
Yazoo: must we do flashbacks in this story?
Cloud: umm...yeah
Yazoo: arghhh...LIGHTS! ( everything turns dark and they sit on the floor )
IN THE FLASHBACK
Cloud: so which one of you took my Choco shampoo?
Kadaj: Choco Shampoo?
Yazoo: we didnt take any shampoo
Loz: dont look at me I dont use shampoo ( everyone looks at him ) what?...
Cloud: no wonder your hair smells like oil...well then hes out
Yazoo: oh just because he doesnt use shampoo?
Cloud: duh Shampoo Thief
Yazoo: I DIDNT STEAL YOUR FREAKING SHAMPOO!
Cloud: Kadaj?
Kadaj: HELL NO! I DIDNT STEAL YOUR SHAMPOO! I DONT WANT CHOCOBO BUTT HAIR!
Yazoo: Not many people want Chocobo butt hair Cloud
Cloud: and I bet you guys want to have Chocobo hair?
Kadaj,Yazoo: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO! ( throws chicken legs at Cloud )
Cloud: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!CHICKEN LEGS!OOOWWW! ( rubs his head but keeps getting poked by the talons on the millions of legs that are stuck in his hair )
Kadaj,Yazoo: HAHA! THATS WHAT YOU GET!
Cloud: oh yeah...( takes out his Shampoo and makes their hair chocobo style )
Yazoo: WTTFF?
Kadaj: YOU HAD YOUR FCKING SHAMPOO THIS WHOLE TIME DUMBASS!
Cloud: oh really...YAY! ( takes out all 6 of his swords ) PREPARE TO DIE!
Kadaj,Yazoo: WTF? ( takes out their weapons and duel Cloud )
The Flashback Ends
Yazoo: that whole freakin battle started because you didnt know your shampoo was in your hand
Cloud: sooo... I got to fight you two...except for Loz...dammit
Kanna: were they just watching a flashback?
Killa: I dont know...I was eating cheese
Alexia: I think they were since I saw Cloud battling
Kadaj: that better not have been the shampoo flashback
ATG: WHA? SHAMPOO?
Kadaj: nevermind...
Yazoo: umm...did I just hear voices?
Cloud: how would I know...I hear different voices...
In the Lifestream
Lucrecia: SEPHIROTH IS BETTER! AND HE HAS BETTER HAIR!
Clouds Mother: NO CLOUD IS BETTER! AND HE HAS BETTER...well...I DONT KNOW!
Lucrecia: HAH! YOU DONT EVEN KNOW YOUR SON!
Clouds Mother: YOUR THE ONE WHO DIED AFTER YOU GAVE BIRTH!
Lucrecia: well at least I wasnt poor
Clouds Mother: ggggggggrrrrrrt ( tackles Lucrecia and pulls her hair )
Lucrecia: BITCH! ( pulls Clouds Mothers hair and bites her arms )
Clouds Mother: OOOOWWWW! YOU JACKASS! ( the lifestream comes in a human form )
Lifesteam: BREAK IT UP ALREADY!
CML: BACK OFF! GO BACK TO YOUR LITTLE PLANET! ( they both punch the lady back into an invisible wall )
Lifestream: AAAAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH ( joins in the fight )
Back to Reality
Cloud: I swear I heard three women fighting
Yazoo: mybe you do have problems
Cloud: prolly ( gets tapped on the shoulder by Kadaj and Kanna ) AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! STAY AWAY FROM ME I AM WARNING YOU! I HAVE A SILVER HAIRED FREAK ON MY SIDE AND I AM NOT AFRAID TO USE HIS HEAD!
Yazoo: WHAT! ( grabs Cloud by the legs and hits him against the ticket counter )
CTL: SIR! STOP THAT!
Yazoo: BACK OFF OR YOUR NEXT!
CTL: ok...enjoy sir!
Kanna: GO YAZOO!
Killa: WOOT WOOT WOOT WOOT! ( munches on cheese )
Alexia: THATS YAZOO FOR YA!
Kadaj: hey Yazoo let me help ( takes out the paintball gun and shoots Cloud )
Cloud: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!
Yazoo: now I have a pink flowered Chocobo to ride
Cloud: WWWWWWWWAAAAAAA!
Kanna: maybe we should wash it off but not all the way
Killa: ok! ( casts waterga 10 times on Cloud )
Cloud: theres still some left
Alexia: we want it to be that way
Kadaj: hey Yaz, your gonna be racing in like 5 minutes
Yazoo: shit...
Kanna: here Cloud! ( throws him a dressphere )
Cloud: huh? ( turns into a Chocobo ) WWWWWWWWWWAAAAARRRRRRKKKK!
Yazoo: well now Im ready ( drags Cloud off to the start )
Kadaj: come on lets go watch
ATG: alright!
In the Audience
Alexia: I cant believe Yazoo is entering
Killa: can you imagine Seph in this race though?
Kadaj: ...NOPE!
Cloud: hell no
Kanna: oh yeah! he is riding a chocobo with Masamune Unsheathed and kills all the racers
Alexia: ummm...I think he is in the race...
Kanna: WHAT! ( steals binoculars and sees Sephiroth )...IM ROOTING FOR SEPHIROTH!
Kadaj: Im rooting for Loz
Cloud: hes in it too!
Killa: hmm...yep...IM ROOTING FOR LOZ!
Alexia: IM ROOTING FOR YAZOO!
Cloud: then I guess I am rooting for the guy with cheap duck tape
Alexia: what...WHY IS HE EVERYWHERE?
Kanna: theres about...4 of them down there
Alexia: shit...
Killa: HEY THE RACE IS STARTING!
Kadaj: is that Cait Sith?
Cloud: oh really! never mind the guy with Duck tape then, GO CAIT SITH!
IN THE RACE
Cait: go faster PINKLADIAOFPINKLAND!
Kanna: what a dreadful name...
Kadaj: MY EYES!
Killa: seriously, a pink chocobo?
Cloud: WITH DAMN HOT PINK FLOWERS!
Loz: weird chocobo, GIDDIYAP ZAYRO!
Yazoo: NO WAY IS THAT DUCK TAPE GUY IS GONNA BE IN FRONT OF ME! ( takes out Velvet Nightmare and shoots one of the clones off ) MUAHAHAHA! ( speeds past )
Loz: WHERE THE HELL ARE THESE GUYS COMING FROM! ( punches one off the race track )
Sephiroth: FORGET THIS! ( takes out Masamune and slices the remaining stalker dudes ) damn stalkers...
Kanna: hey whos that with the neck-length silver hair?
Cloud: THERES MORE PIECES OF SEPHIROTHS SOUL?
Alexia: HELL NO, AND THEIR NOT PARTS OF HIS SOUL! and besides thats a girl. She has a black dress that comes mid thigh height,twp belts across her chest,a black headband,and black shoes. She also has one red-eye and one violet eye
Cloud: sure sounds like part of his soul...
Unknown: ughh, theres still one left...( makes her arm transform into a sword and slices the last stalker guy off ) better
So they all race and chaotic things happen...Cait falls into the pit of Dragons, Loz gets shot repeatedly by Yazoo after he pulled his hair so he wouldnt fall, and Sephiroth and the new girl clash weapons. In the end they all win after threatning the people and destroying half the track.
Sephiroth: so who are you?
Unknown: I am Anhel
Kanna: cool name
Anhel: thanx
Alexia: so what brings you here?
Anhel: just to fight
Killa: and race? cheese...bacon...
Kadaj: dont mind her she likes cheese and bacon
Anhel: I noticed ( scoots away slowly )
Loz: I want some chicken
Cloud: better not eat the chocobos...
Yazoo: hey, lets all go to the battle arena
All: alright!
In the Battle Arena
Kanna: 10? I am not gonna pay then
RL: but ma'am
Loz,Cloud: HOW MANY OF THESE ROBOTS ARE THERE!
Kadaj,Yazoo: too much for our liking
Sephiroth: so whos doing it this time?
Anhel:I will take the honor ( her hands transform into 3 barrel guns ) DIE BITCH!
Kanna: I like her
Killa: DIE FOR NOT HAVING CHEESE
Alexia: Killa get away from us
Killa: chee? chee chee cheese eese?
Cloud: WTF she just say?
Yazoo: I dont know, I dont speak cheese
Sephiroth: none of us do except for her
Alexia: whos fighting first?
Killa: well everyone is dead in this place so lets all go in
Kanna: in groups
All: fair enough
So they all get into groups. Sephiroth,Kadaj,and Yazoo are a group, Kanna,Alexia, and Anhel are in a group, and Killa,Cloud, and Loz are in a group.
Sephiroth: ook so are we all in a group?
All: yes!
Anhel: I never knew there were door ways in the battle arena
Killa: ARE YOU SERIOUS! LETS GO! ( Killa drags her group to a door with barbeque print above it )
Sephiroth: well then we are going to that room ( goes into a room with 7 above it )
Kanna: and I guess that leaves us with this door ( goes into a room with a 2 above it )
In the Room with 7 above it
Kadaj: sheesh, now when were we in a field of flowers?
Yazoo: how would I know
Sephiroth: why flowers!
Just then 700000 Stalker Dudes popped out of nowhere like daisies
SKY: WTF?
STA1: PREPARE TO DIE!
Sephiroth: I wish you luck then
Yazoo: and so do I
Kadaj: happy deaths! ( all the SD take out guns )
SKY: no problem
The silver headed group challenge the Stalker Dude army #1. The SDA1 fire like crazy, but were to lazy to actually aim at a fatal target. Three of the Staker Dudes managed to actually aim right and shot directly at Yazoo,Kadaj,and Sephiroth. They saw this and ended up doing Matrix moves. Sephiroth stopped the bullets in place and shot it back at them. Yazoo bended his back and lets the bullets fly over him. Kadaj fliiped into the air and let the bullets fly underneathe him. All of this in slow motion since for some reason the author put slow on the guys...or maybe she paused them...shes not sure herself. In a few minutes the whole army was dead, thanks to Fire 3 and Fire 4 eternity casted by none other than Sephiroth. In the end, they all flipped their hair like Charlies Angles since it was in their face. Again the author slow motions it. ( FFs77: so beautiful they are )
Kadaj: that was easy
Yazoo: and I actually got to flip my hair
Sephiroth: WHERE THE HELL IS THE EXIT?
The battle arena was scared of them so it popped out a exit door out of nowhere for the silver haired beauties.
Kadaj: there it is
Yazoo: wow, Sephiroth sure is intimidating
Sephiroth: thats because they know I am a God ( they all walk through the exit )
In the Room with 2 above it
Kanna: ITS TO DAMN BRIGHT HERE!
Anhel: really I cant see ( wears dark sunglasses )
Alexia: hey no fair, where you get glasses?
Anhel: over at the glasses store over there ( points to a random glasses store considering theres so many )
Kanna: WELL THEN I NEED GLASSES! ( rushes into one )
Alexia: great...well at least she isnt roasting the whole place ( walks after Kanna )
Anhel: well at least they have air conditioning, this place is freakin hot! ( goes in )
In the Store
Kanna: WTF? WHY ARE THEY EVERYWHERE?
Alexia: ITS MY WORST DREAM COME TRUE! THE ANNOYING BITCH HAS CLONES AND A ARMY!
Anhel: GET THIS BITCH OFF ME! ( shoots the guy off )
Kanna: lets just get the glasses and get out of this crazy room!
Alexia,Ahnel: FINE BY US!
Kanna gets her glasses but all three come out with three stalker dudes or more on their backs or clinging to their arms and legs.Annoyed, Ahnel casts bolt 3 and bolt 4 on all the guys and stores. Alexia goes Quake 3 on the place and the guys behind them. Kanna casts Flare and Tornado which they combined out of nowhere and created a tornado of fire.
Kanna: I should do that more often
Alexia: WHAT HAPPENED TO THE QUADRA MAGIC MATERIA THAT WAS PAIRED WITH MY EARTH MATERIA?
Ahnel: he has it, after him!
They all chase after the stealer stalker dude and run into the SDA#2 .
Anhel: WHERE THE HELL ARE THESE GUYS COMING FROM!
Alexia: IS THERE A FACTORY OF SOMETHING!
Kanna: I WOULDNT MIND SEPH CLONES, BUT THIS GUY...HELL NO!
And then they all engage in a battle. Kanna uses her MuraLoki to wipe out half the army, Alexia gets her Quadra Magic back and goes Quake 3 on their asses only 4 times worst, and Ahnel uses bozookas which she used to wipe out the rest. Alexia notices a factory or machine looking thingy and goes quake 3 on it also.
Kanna: well what do ya know, they do have a factory
Ahnel: and it is still producing
Alexia: AGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH! ( goes quake 3 again )
Kanna: hey look a exit!
Ahnel: well then lets hurry through and gt the hell outta here
Alexia: yeah, away from this place...( shudders and runs out )
Kanna,Anhel: HEY WAIT FOR US!
In the room with the Barbeque pic above it
Killa: THIS PLACE SMELLS SO GOOD!
Zax: it smells like barbeque sauce
Loz: well barbeque sauce is good on chicken
Cloud: and chocobos...
Zax:...YOU ATE A CHOCOBO!
Cloud: HELL NO! I WOULD NEVE DO THAT! my chocobos like putting sauce on their greens
Killa: barbeque sauce is also good on cheese!
Everyone: YYYYYYYYYUUUUUUUUCCKKK!
Killa: what? ( SDA#3 appears in front of the group )
Cloud: WTF?
Zax: HOW MANY FREAK STALKERS ARE AFTER ALEXIA?
Loz: you sure all of them are after her?
Killa: I dont think so...AAAHHH!
SO they all go into battle. To shorten this thing, I a going to say that the group did some pretty badass moves and killed the whole army. Killa mostly went bullet crazy with guns and any other firing weapon, Cloud was using his six swords which could combine into one big one, and Loz stole a motorcyle and was using his Dualhound. After the battle a bright light appears.
Killa: AAAAHHH MY EYES! ITS TOO BRIGHT!
Cloud: its...
Loz: B1 BARBEQUE SAUCE! WOOT WOOT!
Killa: WE ARE GONNA HAVE GOOD FOOD TONIGHT!
They all grab 900 bottles for themselves and head out a exit they found after defeating the army
In the Battle Arena
Sephiroths Group: MAN! WE SHOULD FIGHT HERE ORE OFTEN!
Ahnels group: HEEELLOOO NOOO! WE ARE NEVER FIGHTING HERE AGAIN!
Killas group: WE NEED TO COME HERE MORE OFTEN! THERES BABEQUE SAUCE!
Kanna: OOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooo I want some, give it here!
Alexia: hey lets all go check Zax
Yazoo: HES GONNA MAKE ME SING!
Alexia: LETS GO THEN!
Ahnel: women are the boss
Sephiroth: WHAT!
Kanna: Sephiroth...
Sephiroth: well sorry my wife...
In the Event Square
Everybody walk in and notice there is a giant audience full of people. They all think of ways on how to hurt Zax, especially Yazoo.
Yazoo: he sure wanted me to suffer more...
Alexia: well at least your singing!
Yazoo: hmph
Kanna: where is Zax anyway?
Sephiroth: there he is ( points to the stage )
Zax: ALRIGHT! ALL OF MY FRIENDS GET YOUR ASSES OVER HERE AND GET DRESSED UP! THIS IS GONNA BE ONE HELL OF A PARTY!
All: great...( sigh )
Backstage, Girls Room
Kanna: hmm...what am I gonna wear?
Alexia: hmmm...Im gonna wear something red and black
Killa: hey dont we actually be in pink or purple for once
Kanna: I CALL PURPLE! AND BLACK!
Alexia: then I am wearing pink and red
Killa: I think im gonna wear...blue!
Ahnel: i will wear black and red then
Kanna: hmmm...( takes out Tifas outfit in the movie only the shirt is a sleeveless turtleneck and purple, the pants are black and the shoes are black and purple) I am gonna wear this, ( takes out a silver chain belt ) wow...I actually got my clothers out in a few minutes ( goes to change )
Alexia: I think I am gonna wear... ( takes out a pink tank top, a long red squart that was cut to the waist on both sides, and pink boots ) this...all I need is some arlmlets ( goes to change, and grabs armlets on the way out )
Ahnel: ...( takes out a red shirt with black belts across the chest, black shorts with zipper pockets, knee high black boots, and red ribbon ) this is fine for me ( wrapped the ribbon around her hands and wrist and then went to go change )
Killa: hmmm...( takes out a blue short sleeved shirt with a werewolf on it, cut dark navy pants, a small jacket with a silver wolf head on the back, and light blue sneekers ) me likey! ( goes to change )
Backstage, Boys Room
Zax: I CANT WAIT FOR THE SHOW!
Sephiroth: and I am singing once again ( takes out a black cut short sleeved shirt, a torn grey vest, black belted pants, knee high black boots, a black headband, and fingerless gloves ) I will be in the changing room ( walks off )
Kadaj: ummm...me And Loz are gonna look out for any more Stalker guys, see ya Yazoo!
Yazoo: NO TAKE ME WITH YOU!
Zax: MUAHAHAHAHAA! now lets see what should you wear? girl clothes?
Yazoo: ARRGGGGGH! ( throttles Zax head with a chair )
Zax: OWWWW OK OK NO GIRL CLOTHES!
Yazoo: hmph! ( takes out his original outfit and goes to change )
Zax: your no fun...( takes out dark navy torn cut jeans, a red shirt with belts on the arms, and black boots ) Why do girls have more dressing rooms? man...( waits for Yazoo )
Cloud: I AM NOT GONNA SING!
Zax: oh come on Cloud, yu have to do something!
Cloud: fine I will announce and dance
Zax: boo
On the rolar Caoster and Ride
Kadaj: THERES SO MANY FREAKING GUYS! ( shoots at the guys from the rolar coaster )
Loz; your telling me, poor Yazoo ( casts all the magic he can think of from the Gondala )
Back to the Stage
Zax: well is everyone ready?
All: yeah!
Zax: alright, Cloud should be announcing any minute, whos going first exactly?
Kanna: I guess me, lets getthis over with!
Cloud: Alright, the first contestent today is Kanna! ( Kanna goes on stage )
Kanna: alright, I am going to sing Devil Inside...
Here
come the woman
With the look in her eye
Raised on leather
With
flesh on her mind
Words as weapons
Sharper than knives
Makes
you wonder
How the other half die
Other half die
Makes
you wonder
Oh-oh-wonder
Here come the man
With the look
in his eye
Fed on nothing
But full of pride
Look at
them go
Look at them kick
Makes you wonder
How the other
half live
The devil inside
The devil inside
Every
single one of us
The devil inside
The devil inside
The
devil inside
Every single one of us
The devil inside
Here
come the world
With the look in its eye
Future uncertain
But
certainly slight
Look at the faces
Listen to the
bells
It's hard to believe
We need a place called hell
A
place called hell
The devil inside
The devil inside
Every
single one of us
The devil inside
The devil inside
The
devil inside
Every single one of us
The devil inside
Here
comes the woman
With the look in her eye
She's raised on
leather
With flesh on her mind
Words are weapons
Sharper
than knives
Makes you wonder
How the other half die
The
devil inside
The devil inside
Every single one of us
The
devil inside
The devil inside
The devil inside
Every single
one of us
The devil inside
Audience claps loudly but being the girl that she is silences them with a bozooka and bows
Cloud: Kanna dont blow up the place...well anywayz, Alexia is next!
Alexia: yes! ( goes on stage )
Elements
As
your body is relieved of your spirit
which has reterned to pure
energy
you'll become a part of the elements
feel this fire
deep inside
burning stronger you can't hide
join the elements
tonight
and see the light
when the darkness comes too
strong
don't forget you're not alone
join the elements and feel
the light
(the light)
( and feel the light )
Elements
join the elements tonight x3
and see the
light
join the elements tonight x3
and feel the light
( feel the elements )
feel this fire deep inside
burning
stronger you can't hide
join the elements tonight
and see the
light
when the darkness comes too strong
don't forget
you're not alone
join the elements and feel the light
( the light )
Elements
join the elements tonight x3
and
see the light
join the elements tonight x3
and feel the
light
( the light )
Elements
Elements
Kanna: WOOT I LOVE THIS SONG! ( puts on the music to it )
Alexia: THANX KANNA! ( starts dancing to it and sings it again)
Elements
As
your body is relieved of your spirit
which has reterned to pure
energy
you'll become a part of the elements
feel this fire
deep inside
burning stronger you can't hide
join the elements
tonight
and see the light
when the darkness comes too
strong
don't forget you're not alone
join the elements and feel
the light
(the light)
( and feel the light )
Elements
join the elements tonight x3
and see the
light
join the elements tonight x3
and feel the light
( feel the elements )
feel this fire deep inside
burning
stronger you can't hide
join the elements tonight
and see the
light
when the darkness comes too strong
don't forget
you're not alone
join the elements and feel the light
( the light )
Elements
join the elements tonight x3
and
see the light
join the elements tonight x3
and feel the
light
( the light )
Elements
Elements
Cloud: WOOT! GREAT ALEXIA! Next is Ahnel!
Ahnel:well I am singing everybodys fool!
Perfect
by nature
Icons of self indulgence
Just what we all need
More lies about a world that
Never was and never will be
Have you no shame? Don't you see me?
You know you've got
everybody fooled
Look here she comes now
Bow down and
stare in wonder
Oh how we love you
No flaws when you're
pretending
But now I know she
Never was and never will be
You don't know how you've betrayed me
And somehow you've got
everybody fooled
Without the mask, where will you hide?
Can't find yourself lost in your lie
I know the truth now
I know who you are
And I don't love you anymore
It
Never was and never will be
You don't know how you've betrayed me
And somehow you've got everybody fooled
It never was and
never will be
You're not real and you can't save me
Somehow
now you're everybody's fool
Boys in the Audience: THEY ARE ALL SO COOL! WANNA GO OUT WITH US?
Kanna,Alexia,Ahnel: HELL NO! ( take out bozookas)
Cloud: Guys dont blow the stage up...
Kanna,Alexia,Ahnel: MAN-UH! ( put them away )
Cloud: next is...Sepiroth!
Fangirls: YAY! WE LOVE YOU!
Cloud: sike!
Fangirls: WHAT! ( throw anything they can get their hands on at Cloud, even people )
Cloud: OW OW OW NEXT OW IS OW! IS KILLA!
Killa: ALRIGHT SO ALL YOU DAMN GIRLS STOP THROWING THINGS OR I WILL SHOOT YA! ( they all stop, including the ones at the screen) wellz I am singing a different version of Devil Inside
Everybody
wants me to be their angel
Everybody wants something they can
cradle
They don't know I burn
They don't know I burn
They
don't know I burn
They don't know I burn
Maybe there's a
devil (or something like it) inside
Maybe there's a devil (or
something like it) inside of me
Devil (or something like it)
inside
Maybe there's a devil somewhere really deep inside me
Devil
inside of me
Jealous angel deep inside me
You don't know
cuz you're too busy reading labels
You're missing all the action
underneath my table
I'm waiting for my turn
Waiting for my
turn
Just waiting for my turn
Just waiting for my turn
Maybe
there's a devil (or something like it) inside
Maybe there's a
devil (or something like it) inside of me
Devil (or something like
it) inside
Maybe there's a devil somewhere really deep inside
me
Devil inside of me
Jealous angel deep inside me
Time
to make it burn
This is how I burn
Maybe there's a devil
(or something like it) inside
Maybe there's a devil (or something
like it) inside of me
Devil (or something like it) inside
Maybe
there's a devil somewhere really deep inside me
Devil inside of
me
Jealous angel deep inside me
Audience: woot! ( some people are still dancing from the previous songs )
Cloud: next is...YAZOO!
Yazoo: WHY ME!
Fangirls: HEY YOU DIDNT SING LAST TIME!
Zax: thats the whole point for this karoke sesion
Yazoo: I am going to sing Breaking the Habit
Zax: and?
Yazoo: and pushing me away...
Zax: ok then go ahead!
Yazoo:Memories
consume
Like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again
You all assume
I'm safe here in my room
(unless I try
to start again)
I don't want to be the one
The battles
always choose
'Cause inside I realize
That I'm the one
confused
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or
why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say
what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I know
it's not alright
So I'm
Breaking the habit
Tonight
Clutching my cure
I tightly lock the door
I try to
catch my breath again
I hurt much more
Than anytime before
I
had no options left again
I'll paint it on the walls
'Cause I'm the one at fault
I'll never fight again
And
this is how it ends
I don't know what's worth fighting
for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
To
show you what I mean
I don't know how I got this
I'll
never be alright
So I'm
Breaking the habit
Breaking the
habit
Tonight
Fangirls: he has such a sexy voice!
Alexia: BACK OFF!
Yazoo:I've
lied to you
The same way that I always do
This is the last
smile
That I'll fake for the sake of being with you
Pre
chorus:
(Everything falls apart, even the people who never frown
eventually break down)
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
(Everything has to end, you'll soon find we're out of time left
to watch it all unwind)
The sacrifice is never knowing
Why
I never walked away
Why I played myself this way
Now I see
your testing me pushes me away
I've tried like you
To do
everything you wanted too
This is the last time
I'll take the
blame for the sake of being with you
Pre chorus
Chorus
(2x)
We're all out of time, this is how we find how it all
unwinds
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
We're all out of
time, this is how we find how it all unwinds
The sacrifice is
never knowing
Chorus (2x)
Pushes me away…(2x)
Ahnel: wow Yazoo does sound good
Cloud: NOW ITS TIME FOR SEPHIROTH!
Sephiroth: cheer and I will kill you all ( everyone stays quiet ) I am going to sing Hit the Floor
Zax: I knew Seph would sing something like that
Sephiroth:There
are just too many
Times that people
Have tried to look inside
of me
Wondering what I think of you
And I protect you out of
courtesy
Too many times that I've
Held on when I needed to
push away
Afraid to say what was on my mind
Afraid to say
what I need to say
Too many
Things that you've said about
me
When I'm not around
You think having the upper hand
Means you've got to keep putting me down
But I've had too
many stand-offs with you
It's about as much as I can stand
Just wait until the upper hand
Is mine
So many people
like me
Put so much trust in all your lies
So concerned with
what you think
To just say what we feel inside
So many people
like me
Walk on eggshells all day long
All I know is that all
I want
Is to feel like I'm not stepped on
There are so many
things you say
That make me feel like you've crossed the line
What goes up will surely fall
And I'm counting down the
time
'Cause I've had so many stand-offs with you
It's
about as much as I can stand
So I'm waiting until the upper
hand
Is mine
One minute you're on top
The next
you're not
Watch it drop
Making your heart stop
Just
before you hit the floor
One minute you're on top
The next
you're not
Missed your shot
Making your heart stop
You
think you won
And then it's all gone
I know I'll
never trust a single thing you say
You knew your lies would
divide us
But you lied anyway
And all the lies have got you
floating
Up above us all
But what goes up has got to fall
Anhel: that sounds familiar
Kanna: Hojo?
Alexia: maybe
Cloud: next is Zax!
Zax: yay! I am going to sing Its Easier to Run
Killa: I love that song
Zax:Sometimes
I
Need to remember just to breathe
Sometimes I
Need you
to stay away from me
Sometimes I'm
In disbelief I didn't
know
Somehow I
Need you to go
Sometimes I
Feel
like I trusted you too well
Sometimes I
Just feel like
screaming at myself
Sometimes I'm
In disbelief I didn't
know
Somehow I
Need to be alone
Don't stay
Forget
our memories
Forget our possibilities
What you were changing
me into
(Just give me myself back and)
Don't stay
Forget
our memories
Forget our possibilities
Take all your
faithlessness with you
(Just give me myself back and)
Don't
stay
I don't need you anymore
I don't want to be
ignored
I don't need one more day
Of you wasting me away
With no apologies
Ahnel: WOOT! GO ZAX! ( slices away the fangirls )
Zax: NEXT IS CLOUD!
Cloud: Alright I am going to sing REMEDY
Ahnel: good song
Kanna: one of my favorites
Cloud:Throw
your dollar bills and leave your thrills all here with me
And
speak but don't pretend I won't defend you anymore you see
It
aches in every bone, I'll die alone, but not for you
My eyes
don't need to see that ugly thing, I know it's me you fear
If you
want me hold me back
Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the
pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the
wings that get you high, just leave them where they lie
And tell
yourself, "You'll be the death of me"
I don't need
a friend, I need to mend so far away
So come sit by the fire and
play a while, but you can't stay too long
It aches in every bone,
I'll die alone, but not for pleasure
I see my heart explode, it's
been eroded by the weather here
If you want me hold me back
Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the wings that get you
high, just leave them where they lie
And tell yourself, "You'll
be the death of me"
Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the
pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the
wings that get you high, just leave them where they lie
And tell
yourself, "You'll be the death of me"
Hold your
eyes closed, take me in
Hold your eyes closed, take me in
Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the wings that get you
high, just leave them where they lie
And tell yourself, "You'll
be the death of me"
Frail, the skin is dry and pale, the
pain will never fail
And so we go back to the remedy
Clip the
wings that get you high, just leave them where they lie
And tell
yourself, "You'll be the death of me
Kanna: hey lets put on techno, that way we can sneak out of here
Anhel: yeah
Alexia: can we dance first?
Kanna: yes, dance then scram
Anhel,Alexia: deal! ( they put on techno and evertbody start dancing )
Kanna dances with Sephiroth, Alexia with Yazoo, and Anhel dances with Cloud and Zax. Killa is eating, but then a black and white wolf appears on the stage.
Killa: SHADOW!
Kannal: hey Shadow, how ya been doin?
Shadow: I have been doing well thank you
Ahnel: now can we blow this place up?
All: YEAH!
Everyone blows up the place with bozookas, the stalker guys are now dead, Kadaj and Loz are trying to get B1 barbeque sauce, and everyone goes to sleep on top of the ruins of the Golden Saucer.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH I HATE THIS COMPUTER! well anywayz thank you Sin the Dark Priestess for ya ideas, made me laugh. I give credit to everyone, especially Midnight, Sin, and Killa.