Sho ran off after big sis ran off…but he didn't run off after big sis.
He had something that he needed to do….and then he would do it….and…and he didn't know what he would do after he was done but…but he knew that he would do something! He just…dad…he had to teach dad a lesson and…and he was going to fight dad. Dad was on his way and Sho was going to fight him. Sho was going to…to hit him…and bite him…and rip out handfuls of his hair….and kick his teeth in….and…and a whole bunch of other stuff that he would do later!
But first he had something to do.
Having something to do helped a whole lot. He could see it, in his head, what he had to do and the order he had to do it in. He had to run down to the lowest level, the one with the prisoners not the one with the boilers and circuit breakers and stuff, and he had to steal the keys and he had to let the prisoners go….and then he had to fight off all the Awakened and Scars too…and he was angry enough to do it. The walls caved in a little as he ran. He didn't care. He didn't care that tiles came up under his feet as he ran down the hallway. He didn't care about this place. He didn't care that dad had spent his whole life building this place.
He wanted it to come down.
Dad deserved it! Dad deserved to have everything that he had ever built come down right over his head! He deserved to have the whole world coming down over his head until his head was just one big bump and his brain was soup and…and he was dead. He wanted dad to be dead. He wanted…dad…dad was the one who….he wanted dad dead! And he wanted Fukuda to…to suffer. He couldn't…he could never kill Fukuda…even after all of that he could never kill Fukuda…because Fukuda was…he just…
Nothing made sense anymore so he kept on running.
He knew this place by now. He had been living here for months. The hallways, the stairways, all of it. Sho knew this place like the back of his hand. He knew the fastest way to get to the basement and he didn't care if people saw him running…and he didn't care if he bumped into people. Especially not the stupid Awakened with the stupid blue ribbon who was walking down the middle of a hallway, one that he shouldn't have even been walking down since he was a level three!
"Get out of my fucking way!" said Sho as he pushed the Awakened to the ground. That guy said something about big sis…probably about how awesome she was. He was one of the people who thought that big sis was a princess or a god or something. He didn't care. He had…he had something to do…and he didn't want to think about big sis…about how he had been lying….about how he had been lying to big sis for almost two years…and how he had been lying without even knowing that he was lying…because Fukuda had been keeping the truth from him…
The truth…about baby sis….
Baby sis was his baby sis. She was his baby sis and he was her…he was her big brother. They had the same blood inside of them. They had the same blood inside of them and…and that was dad's fault! He had made a whole other person and…and just…sent her away! Baby sis was his real life baby sis, not pretend, and…and he should have stayed! He should have stayed with her from the very first time he came to visit…and he should have kept baby sis at the house with him…and he should have kicked dad in the balls so hard that he never became anyone else's dad ever again!
Sho had a little sister…
He was a big brother for real. He was…it felt different…knowing that he was her big brother. Dad had always talked about the bloodline and how it was important…how it was important that he made more people called Suzuki…and dad had made another person called Suzuki…and he was her big brother. Suzuki Mukai was his little sister. She was…Sagami Mukai. Baby sis was called Sagami Mukai and…and had a mom…and her mom could come with them and…and then baby sis could be with them but…but her mom was a girl…and she might have been the girl that dad did it with….
Dad had done it with someone who wasn't mom…
Mom wasn't coming back. Sho knew girls. He knew that they didn't like being cheated on. Dad was a cheater .Dad was a cheater and he had cheated on mom. He had done it with a girl who wasn't mom. Thinking about his parents doing it…doing that super gross thing together…that was way too much to think about. He had only seen his parents kissing once in his entire life and even thinking about it made him want to throw up. Thinking about them doing that thing…the gross thing…it…thinking about them doing it made him want to roll around in someone else's throw up until he felt cleaner. Thinking about dad doing that with some other lady…one who wasn't his mom…that made him want to eat someone else's throw up and then throw it up on himself so it was like double throw up…then he would feel cleaner….because he did not want to think about dad doing that….
Fuck dad!
Fuck him! Seriously! Cheating was the worst thing that you could do…Sho was a cheater too….but holding hands was nothing! He got it now, what Fukuda had meant when he'd said that. There were worse things that a person could do to another…like kissing them! Sho…Sho hadn't kissed Ritsu…and there were worse things even than kissing! Sticking your dick inside of someone like they were a piece of pita bread was way worse than kissing and hand holding! Sho was glad that he only liked guys, at least there wasn't any danger of him sticking his stick in anyone else because not only was it gross but he didn't even have a place for his dick to go…unless you could stick a dick in another dick…like a corndog…that wasn't important right now! What was important was….was doing the right thing….
So that was what he was going to do!
There wasn't anyone in the guard's room. That was good. Nobody was watching the cameras…so Sho could turn them off…and the key cabinet opened pretty fast when he used his powers. He saw a soda on the floor by the camera control table…and he spilled it. He spilled it all over the controls…maybe it would look like an accident…and just to be safe he kicked it a few times too. There. Now there would be no evidence…and dad wouldn't come after him…
Not that dad had any right to say or do anything to Sho when he…he had to calm the fuck down.
He could freak out once he was done. That was it. That was…what was going to happen. Right now he needed to…to do the right thing…so that was what he was going to do. Someone in this family had to do the right thing…someone besides big sis. Maybe she was good because she was a girl so she had gotten a lot more of mom than he did. He was mostly dad. That was why he was…the way he was. Why he was so terrible. He was just…part of dad…and dad was terrible…so maybe he was destined to be a terrible person…
He could try to do at least one thing right in his life…this thing…this thing that he was going to do.
Ritsu noticed him first, because he had an aura. Sho…he liked it…that Ritsu noticed him. He liked the way Ritsu's whole aura lit up. He liked the way Ritsu smiled at him. He liked….he liked the way Ritsu was so happy to see him and…and it made him feel like his insides had been scooped out and filled with goldfish….he liked it a lot….but he also hated it. He had promised someone that he would be with them for the rest of his life and that meant that he wasn't supposed to cheat and….and of course Fukuda would be ok with cheating! Dad had cheated on mom! Probably with more than just…just whoever he made Mukai with! He probably had girls everywhere that he cheated with and it was like…like a massive…buffet…of girls…or something….just….
Sho was not dad!
"Sho?! You're alive! Wait….why do you look like that? What's wrong?" asked Ritsu. He had sensed Sho before he saw him. He was there and…and he looked pissed off. He looked like he'd been crying. That was bad. He kicked Reigen awake. If they had to run or fight then it would be better for Reigen to be awake and ready to go…especially since he didn't run that well.
"Something's wrong!?" asked Reigen as he startled awake. He hadn't been sleeping! He'd just been resting his eyes! That was all, nothing else! He'd just been resting his eyes! Ritsu shook his head and pointed…hey! The little red haired kid was still alive! And he had a keyring in his hands.
"Nothing's wrong. I'm getting you out. I stole the key and…and I fucked with the cameras…and now I'm going to let you out and then I'll fight this whole place if I have to. If it means that I can get you out." Said Sho
"Sho…thanks." Said Ritsu. He didn't know what else he could say. Nobody had ever…done that for him. He had thought that Sho had died…that he'd been carried away for experiments…that…that he'd never see Sho again….there he was…and he was going to fight this whole place for Ritsu. This…was a life or death thing…but if it hadn't been…then Ritsu…he would have maybe done that sigh thing Tsubomi did sometimes…or something…because this was…
This was what love felt like…real love…he liked it.
"Mother fucker…hang on. I don't know what key it is." Said Sho as he tried every single key. There were iron ones and metal ones and brass ones and long ones and short ones and one that was made of candy….too much! Who in the hell invented all of these keys?!
"The long one with the two teeth at the end. All cell keys look like that." Said Reigen
"What do you do when I'm not around?" asked Ritsu. He smiled, there, the best that he could…which wasn't much at all…but it was still a smile. He could smile…and he would smile…because he had every reason to smile. He was getting out of here…he was going home…and he may have even been able to take Sho with him…well mom and dad would never let him live in the house but Ritsu could have Sho live in his closet or under his bed or in a hole in the backyard or….something!
"I….made some mistakes in my youth…which you are never to make. Never drink, and never on New Year's Eve, and never after your girlfriend leaves you." Said Reigen. That had not been a good time in his life…and he'd have to tell Ritsu about it when he got older…because he was getting out of here…and then he'd get older…and then he'd have his own adventures in university and Reigen would be there to make sure he never got picked up for drunk and disorderly at three in the morning on New Year's for fighting a tree because he thought that it stole his girlfriend from him.
"I'm never going to have a girlfriend. I'm gay, that's kind of the point." Said Ritsu. It felt good to be able to say it…so he would be saying it a lot from now on. To whoever asked. If anyone had a problem with it then he'd just beat them up with either his powers or the old fashioned way. Life was way too short to lie about stuff like that. He could have died at ten and ten months old. He could die right now. He could die tomorrow. He was not going to die while lying about something that he just…was. He was the way he was and there was nothing wrong with it besides what other people thought and he was not going to live what little life he had left worrying about what other people thought.
"Uh….here! I got it!" said Sho. His heart was pumping so loud that he could hear it in his ears. He was red, he knew that he was red. His whole face was red…and probably his whole chest….and he had so much…just…..happening! Sho knew that he liked Ritsu and maybe Ritsu liked him and…and he might have had a chance and…and he loved Shimazaki and maybe would love him until the day he died…and he knew that loving someone else was wrong when he was supposed to be in love with Emmy and…and he just…
He opened the door.
He held the door opened. That was the polite thing to do. He had to be polite and…and he had to…if he stood behind the door then Ritsu could pass him and…and maybe Sho wouldn't want to pull him close and kiss him. Kiss him and hold him and…and Sho really wanted to touch his chest. Ritsu smelled bad, and he was still all dirty, but Sho didn't care. He wanted…he wanted to kiss him…no. He wanted Ritsu to kiss him…to grab him by the jacket and kiss him…and also to touch his chest…and he wanted to touch Ritsu's chest and…and now not only was he having cheating thoughts he was having gross ones too! And now he was thinking about Shimazaki because he had the nicest chest that Sho had ever seen in his life and he just….he needed to stop having cheating thoughts!
He needed to stop being like dad!
"Sho….thanks…for this…" said Ritsu. The world was bigger, it felt like, since he'd been…there. He'd been there, in the cell, for how long he'd been in there. He didn't know. He didn't know how long it had been. The lights got dim sometimes but there didn't seem to be any reasoning for it. He had been fed nine times…and he had no idea if they were just mad that he'd been letting his food sit or that they just couldn't remember when he'd been last fed. He knew that it had been a while…and now he was out and…
And he could go places.
He had never thought about it, before, how big the world was. How he could just start walking in one direction and not stop. Sure he would get to the ocean at some point, and mom and dad would get worried, but he could always take a boat someplace….and mom and dad never held him prisoner. Sure he felt like a prisoner sometimes….but that didn't mean that he was one for real. He knew what it was like to be a prisoner…
And he was never going to live like that again.
"Ok, so this is the part where we start running. Right guys?" asked Reigen. He knew that look….well he had never seen it on Ritsu before…his student was growing up….and he was very glad that Ritsu was growing up and learning things about himself and all that jazz….he just needed to do it later! Not now! Not when they had to start running for their lives!
"Sho…" said Ritsu. He couldn't breathe….well he could, he wasn't sick, but also he couldn't. He couldn't…believe that he was thinking…what he was thinking. He just…Sho was there and Ritsu felt like…he was warm. He was hot. He was all hot and cold all over and…and he was getting closer to Sho. Sho was still holding the door…he was still behind it….he was still holding the door and Ritsu…he walked closer….
There was a door between him.
"Ritsu…" said Sho. He whispered. He had to whisper. He didn't trust his voice. Maybe if he spoke as quietly as he could he wouldn't say anything that he couldn't take back…anything that he regretted. He just…dad was a cheater and he wasn't…but he wanted to be. Ritsu was close…he was really close. He had his hand on the bars of the door…and he was looking Sho right in the eyes….and his eyes were the same as big sis's….and that was the weird thing. That was weird enough to make him take a step back…and to worry about big sis…and to think about how everything had gone….wrong…and how he had to get back to her and…and how he had to explain to her what had happened…well he had but…but he had to explain again but in a way that erased what Fukuda had said…and he had to help Ritsu escape…
He took a step back.
Ritsu took the door from his hands and then pushed the door so it closed. He took a step forward. Ritsu took another step farther and then another and another…and Sho took another step back…and then another…and another. He took a step back and Ritsu took a step forward…and his heart was pounding. His heart was pounding as hard as it had ever pounded before…and he would have thought that his goldfish would have been scared off…but it was worse than it had ever been before…
His back was to the wall now.
"Ok…how about we pick this up later?" asked Reigen. His eyes darted towards the doorway. This was not the time or the place! He didn't know what he should do. He cleared his through. He cleared his throat again. That had no effect. Nope. There were still two ten year olds over there gazing into each other's eyes….Reigen did not want to watch this. Even if they hadn't been trapped in this cult he still wouldn't have wanted Ritsu…fall in love? Deal with his first crush? Hopefully not have his first kiss…well Reigen was happy that Ritsu had figured himself off and he had someone he liked….and he loved Ritsu like his own kid or a little brother or something….
But like his own kid, or his little brother, or something…he did not want to sit there and watch his first kiss!
"You saved me…so…thanks." Said Ritsu. He…didn't know what to say. He had never felt like this before. He had never in his life wanted…to do this….well he knew what he wanted, he wanted to kiss Sho, and he wanted…well he'd wanted to kiss plenty of guys before, and he had, but it hadn't felt like this. This was perfect. Reigen was there…and he was talking….and Ritsu was going to ignore him. Nothing was going to ruin this….whatever this was. He was just…happy. He had never been so happy in his entire life. He was…so happy…he was free and he was happy and he could just…he could feel his whole…self. Like his body and stuff….like he was alive in it? Well he had always been alive in it but like…this was him and he was this and now he could go anywhere and do anything and just…he knew what he wanted to do…so he was going to do it.
He could die in a second or a day or a month or a year or a million years…so why not…just…yeah…
"Happy to-" said Sho. He…had no idea what he was going to say. His back was to the wall…and he was being kissed…and that was what was happening. Ritsu had been in front of him…and he had gotten closer…and he could remember that he had been thinking of how to get away….but…but he didn't want to get away. He wanted to be here for….for the rest of his life. He wanted to spend his entire life there with Ritsu….but he was cheating! He was a cheater and…and he was the worst kind of person and…
And his hands were on Ritsu's shoulders.
His hands were on Ritsu's shoulders…and now Ritsu's hands were on his waist…and Sho…he could feel Ritsu's hands right there on his hips and…and now he felt like…the goldfish had won. The goldfish had won and he…he wasn't going to fight it. At least it had gone from his stomach now…it had gone downwards and…and this was…this was something that he just…he didn't….this was…so much and…and he felt like….
Like the world was coming down over their heads.
"You two can fall in love after the earth quake!" said Reigen. He grabbed them both by the hands and dragged them awake. Was this awkward? Yes. Had seeing…that weirdly intimate for two ten year olds kiss been by far the most awkward moment of his entire life? Even counting the time blackboard incident of his first year of middle school? Even counting the time he walked in on his roommate watching that WEIRD tape back in university? Even counting the time when the one client got confused about what kind of massages Reigen gave?
Yes. It was.
"This way!" said Sho. He ran to the front of the group. He was at the front because…because he was the one who knew his way around….he went to the front and then….and then Ritsu ran next to him…and took his hand. Ritsu's hand was in his, their fingers were laced together….and he was…the happiest that he had ever been in his entire life….and also the saddest…and also the most embarrassed because his dick had been doing that weird thing again….and also he wanted to crawl into a hole and die! He was a cheater and….and he was still cheating and….
One thing at a time.
The walls were shaking. There was a loud sound like a bomb going off…baby sis…he could feel her…and he could feel big sis too. That was her…her aura. There was a flash of something….white…and then…the lights went out. For a moment Sho thought that he had stared at her aura for too long and now he went blind….but he could see…the hallway he was in turned red. Emergency power. The entire place had gone to emergency power…because of big sis. She was freaking out and…and he could feel it and…and he just…he was more upset with himself than he was…than he was worried about her….and he sucked. So not only was he a liar and a cheater but he was a bad little brother and…and he was still holding hands with Ritsu and….and he wanted to keep on holding hands with him and….
Ritsu's friend slipped. Good.
"I've got you." Said Sho as he caught Ritsu's friend with his powers. He was…better. He was…less…floaty and spacey…like he'd been high. He had been high…being all in love…and stuff. That was love….and he liked it…and he couldn't…couldn't let himself feel it and…and he needed to worry about big sis. He needed to worry about her and the sound of metal twisting and…and the way that the ground was shaking and….and people were running. He could heard them running so…
He ran with them.
"Come on, don't stop running no matter what!" said Sho. He grabbed Ritsu's friend with his powers and kept on running. They ran with the group. These were Awakened and they were all so stupid…too stupid to realize that Sho had helped the prisoners escape. Too scared for their own lives…the floor shook again…the door. There, light…he had never realized it before but there weren't any windows in this place at all. The red lights and the darkness…it was scary…and that was why Ritsu was holding onto him and…
And he was done telling lies.
Ritsu liked him and he liked Ritsu and…and that was why they were running with their fingers all together like this…all fitted together. They were fitting together and…and that was a weird feeling to have while running…this feeling like the goldfish had swam downwards again. He loved….he loved Ritsu so much. He had never been in love like this….a cheater…he was a cheater and he was in love and…and it was hot out. He focused on that. It had gotten really hot really fast. The world was too hot…and he was too hot…he ran for the shade of the trees.
Everyone was running for the shade of the trees.
Everyone was running and screaming…and nobody noticed him. He slowed down to a jog…there were a lot of roots…and he had to…he felt around with his powers. He felt…baby sis was outside….well she was within a hundred meters of him…she was safe. She had to be safe and…and he had to worry about baby sis…and big sis…and not how terrible he was. Not how he was half of dad…not how he…not about what Fukuda had said…not about….he just….
He stopped running.
"Kid…that was one hell of a distraction." Said Reigen as they came to a stop in a thicket of trees. He…hadn't been able to run that far for that long since he'd been a kid. He could…wow. He could breathe a lot better now. That…healer guy…had helped him. He put his weight on his ankle…it was better than new. He felt…good….he was alive! He was alive and Ritsu was alive and now that they were both safe and alive they could get to the main road, get on a bus or a cab or whatever, and just…head back to the city and never mess with these nut jobs ever again!
"That wasn't me….I didn't do that. My sister…she freaked out. Fukuda…that guy who fixed your ankle…he said some stuff and….and I don't want to talk about this. I don't want to talk." Said Sho. He could see, through the trees, that there was a section of the roof missing. The top floor….that was where Fukuda lived…him and some other people…also where the main meeting room and the Division Leader's office was….and there was a big chunk missing….and….and big sis had done that. He should have been there to stop her but he'd been here…cheating….
Saving people lives.
"So…yeah, the road is that way. Follow the rocks…the ones with the green arrows painted on them…and…run. Run and don't ever come back…the Awakened are really dumb but the Scars and stuff aren't so…yeah…" said Sho. He looked down at his shoes. He couldn't look at Ritsu or Ritsu's friend…and he couldn't look up either. If he looked up then he would there then he would see what big sis had done…because of Fukuda…and him. None of this would have happened if he hadn't been sneaking around…and also…also Fukuda…should have said something….or kept his mouth shut….or…or….
He didn't want to think about this!
"Come with me. Sho…just…run away with me. Run away with me and…and we can be….you don't have to be here. It's not safe here for you." Said Ritsu. He took Sho by the hand…it was the most perfect hand that he had ever held in his life. He just…his heart was pounding…and not from the running. The running hadn't felt like anything. Their…kiss…had been the best moment of his life and…and he wanted to do it again. He wanted…
He wanted to spend every single moment of his life with Suzuki Sho.
It could happen. He could sneak Sho into his room and feed him leftovers from dinner and…and he could make a bed in his closet….or something. He just…Sho had saved him. Sho had put his life on the line for him…nobody had ever done that for him before. Well Reigen had but Reigen was an adult and he didn't feel like this about Reigen. He had never felt like this before….
But he liked it.
It was…good. Scary, a little bit, because…it was new. He had been so scared…and he was scared. People were running around and screaming….and his heart was beating in his chest like he was a mouse. The heart of a mouse beat so fast that it didn't even sound like it was beating, no, it sounded more like it was humming. That was how he felt right now…like his heart had been replaced with the heart of a mouse…even though that would have killed him. He just…he wanted to remember this feeling for the rest of his life….he needed….he needed to write this down…he needed to remember this for the rest of his life…
He needed to remember Sho for the rest of his life….especially since he'd...let go of his hand….
"Sho?" asked Ritsu. His heart…hurt. Sho had let go of his hand…and he was looking down at his shoes. Did Sho…not love him anymore? Did Sho not care? Did he….Ritsu reached for his hand again. This time Sho held his hand back…but he still looked down.
"Ritsu…I want to but I can't. I want to go with you…but I can't. I have…a girlfr-um….I have a sister. A little sister…and a big sister…and my sisters need me. My sisters need me…and I can't go…but you can! Go! Run and hide and….and never come back! If you come back then I might not be here to save you so…go!" said Sho. He let go of Ritsu's hand and pushed him with his powers. He didn't look up…he couldn't look up. He knew that if he looked up then he would cry…and if he cried then…if he started to cry then he wouldn't be able to stop….and….and he was crying a little…
He was kissed again.
"Sho…I think I lo-like you…" said Ritsu. He had been about to say 'love' but that would have been too much. He wasn't…sure…now…if it was love…or he had just been scared…or if it was just…other weird feelings. He wanted Sho to be…to be his boyfriend…and his friend….and how he wanted them to be together forever…but they couldn't be together….because he had to run away and…and Sho couldn't run away with him…
"Ritsu…we have to go." Said Reigen. He grabbed Ritsu by the arm and gave him a tug. Ritsu was…he was a kid and he'd been through some terrible stuff that he'd need to talk about with a therapist…and…yeah. Ritsu had been through a lot and he was still going through a lot…and so was Reigen….but he was the adult here….
And as the adult he decided when they ran away….and they were running away right now!
"I….I like…you have to go. I'll make sure nobody follows you just…go, before stuff calms down." Said Sho. He looked up…and that had been the wrong thing to do. Looking into Ritsu's eyes was still weird…he looked like big sis. That was just a reminder that he had messed up…when it came to big sis….and also…if big sis hadn't looked like absolutely no one in his family Sho would have thought that he and Ritsu could have been brothers…
Disgusting!
He…hoped to God that they weren't secret brothers…and he hoped to God that…that Fukuda had been wrong about baby sis being his real sister. He wanted…he wanted Fukuda to have been a liar….he wanted Fukuda to have been lying through his teeth. He wanted dad to just…not have been a cheater! And to not have infected him with cheater genes….but he was infected with dad's cheater genes…because he had just cheated on Emmy with Ritsu…and that had been the best kiss of his life….and…and…and he just…
He looked up.
The walls had stopped caving in…but people were still running and screaming…he hoped that nobody had died. Big sis…she would have been upset about killing someone. Sho…he was upset. He felt like….he felt like….like his insides were all twisted and broken and on fire and alive and he just…he sat down in the grass.
What else could he do at this point?