Silly silly silly...If you're into cute, the beginning is for you. Actually Hisoka's just using the higher easily-mistaken form of biting sarcasm XD
I'lladmitI DID in fact color outside the lines abit on Hisoka's character
:cue Attack of the HxH Fangirls I've ranted at about Hisoka's being out-of-character:

The disclaimer's evident, and judging by this chapter, do you think I'm suited to deal with Hisoka on a 24-hour basis?
Now stop questioning my non-ownership of HunterxHunter and READ!

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The Magician and the Fool: Capitulo Seis

Having gotten her overnight bags, Kawari heaved a great sigh in front of That Door. Hisoka's door.

Without a knock. Without a fine Howdy-do, Kawariyasui Kawari swung the door open (actually a bit surprised that it wasn't locked) and marched dramatically in.

"UNCLE HISOOOKAAAA! I'M BAAAACK!" she proclaimed in a singsong voice, only to be countered with an equally silly welcome.

"AH! MY DEAR-AND-DARLING PETTO-CHAN HAS COME BACK TO ME! OH JOY OF JOYS THAT FILLS MY HEART THIS VERY MOMENT I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!" He rushed to her and wrapped her in his arms tightly with such a sweet voice one would hardly think him to be Hisoka.

"Oh shuft ump you sharcashtik vastard!" she snarled, muffled by his chest. She tried to pry herself away, but only managed to get her head free. "Hisoka…" her eyes went flat and her voice was weary. "You're not wearing any clothes are you…?"

"Nah-ah" he grinned like a naughty child and hugged her tighter.

Kawari's knees went weak and her head fell back to his chest. Why Veto…? WHYYYY! Her eyes popped open and she got a bit of her life back as she sniffed him. Soap. And the room smelled wet…steam was billowing from the bathroom and the merciful gods and goddesses above had blessed him with a terry cloth savior.

Hisoka grinned with narrow eyes, watching her put it all together. He spun off with an effeminate voice and covered his chest. "OH Petto-chan! How COULD you!"

"...What?" she said flatly, now utterly confused.

He looked down and faked a blush like a frail girl and continued in a dramatic voice. "To sneak up on me like that while I was fresh from the shower! Oh you cad you…trying to see nak—"

"BASTARD! You set this up you know it!" She threw her smaller bag and struck him square in the back of his head. Why me? Why him? Her shoulders sank and she fell right onto the bed, already exhausted by the day's surprises and perils. She didn't sleep, only stayed there, afraid of what might jump out to get her if she raised her head. Who knows what this crazy man had in store.

The room quieted, centering around his amused chuckle. His footsteps padded away back to the tile and ruffling cloth was heard. The hairdryer clicked on for a while, then clicked off. Our Kawari was nearly about to drop off to sleep when another weight was added to the mattress. She groaned as she felt strong hands pull her up against his thankfully clothed body. "I missed you…" his voice rang softly in her ear.

"Shit liar…three days isn't enough to know nor miss someone" she grumbled and wormed away to the bedding. The same strong hands caught her hips and pulled her back against his chest.

"And yet you weren't surprised at my nudity" he snickered, lulling her into a sense of calm.

"I was…but I've spent all my shocks and screams today" she let her head lean back into the crook of his neck. "If I did have my zeal you'd be all bloodied up again…" a small smile crept over her lips. "I don't want to go turning you on again"

He held her tighter, taking a slow whiff of her perfume. "I did miss you…" their position and atmosphere was like that of a Casanova-style romance novel, his voice low and tender in her ear. "No one makes eggs like you do"

A wide grin pulled at her face and sputtered in a laugh. She ended up toppling out of his arms and back onto the bed, sprawling sideways over his crossed legs. "Woo, eggs…Very sexy" Kawari chuckled and giggled at the anti-climactic moment (personally glad that it happened this way).

Her smiled faded as she noticed he was prowling over her. His glare was dark and lustful, and he grew so close;Kawari flinched hard as he whispered "You came home in time to make dinner Petto-chan" and got off the bed, walking toward the kitchenette.

Kawari still lay there, eyes wide open now. She blew a sigh of relief, surprised a bit that it wasn't innuendo. "What would you like then…?" she got up and smiled tiredly.

"Eggi" grinned cutely, holding up his plate like a child. Kawari shook her head.

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"So tired and yet it's only eleven…" Hisoka commented between toothpaste on the weary girl leaving the bathroom.

"I haven't exactly had the most peaceful of days recently" Kawari growled and rummaged around in the linen closet. She came out with a bundle of sheets and a few pillows. Hisoka turned his head out of the bathroom and watched the little creature shimmy up the drain pole, climb up the armoire, and tie two ends of the sheet to different ceiling beams.

"Might I ask?" He chuckled with a bit of admiration.

"I may be staying here, but I don't trust my unconscious body with you" Kawari sneered tumbling into her perch. "Once I'm out, I'm out." she buried in the folds and found herself to blush at her sleeping patterns.

"That's good to know…" a wide grin flew over his face. Before Kawari even knew it he was next to her in her hammock.

"Uncle Hisoka…" she grit her teeth, feeling his arms snuggle up next to her.

"Yes Petto-chan?"

"Tell me if you will the whole point of my making a hammock?" her words continued to drip with venom

"Not having to sleep with me, Petto-chan" he started to chuckle.

"Ugh…" Kawari fell limp, too exhausted to fight him. As long as he doesn't try anything… Kawari thought and curled into a tight ball despite his strong arms. "Go awayyyy….."

"Good night Petto-chan" he smiled

About a minute went by when the sleepy silence was broken. "Uncle Hisoka…?"

"Yes Petto-chan?"

"Stop calling me Petto-chan…" she yawned, loosing her annoyance in spite of herself

"Goodnight Petto-chan" he grinned, having his way.

End Capitulo

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:cue the live-studio-audience AWWW:
yes, very cute. Very young and sugary
thankfully that's the last of it for a while
I promise Chapter 7 will be lots of yummy fun
Remember I love your reviews