Fukuda and Sho hadn't played menagerie in years.

That had been Sho's favorite game when he'd been little, Fukuda remembered, he'd had all of these little plastic animals and he'd had these shoebox cages for them...the story, of course, hadn't been anything near coherent. One minute it was a zoo and the next all the animals were friends and then in the very next second there would have been a war between the carnivores and the herbivores…..Sho had always been sort of violent…but also caring too. A nice mix of it…which made sense considering who his parents were….

All things considered Sho was a great kid…and Fukuda…well he'd really fucked up.

Sho hadn't hit him yet, that was good, it meant that he was growing up. If all of this shit had happened even a year ago Fukuda would have been putting himself back together right now instead of listening to Sho's lecture series on proper hamster care. There was a lot to be done, it seemed, and Fukuda…well he was going to be the man to do it. Suzuki was getting soft in his old age, that was the only reason Fukuda could think of as to why he let Sho have any pets at all let alone two cats and twelve hamsters…well more like one cat…apparently the other had either gotten lost or run away…but Fukuda was going to take good care of this one…he owed Sho…

He owed Sho a lot.

He had…not been the best sort of father when it came to Sho. He should have done more to explain to him why it would have been a phenomenally bad idea for Mukai to be anywhere near her family. Suzuki…Sho knew first hand how his father could be…Sho knew…well Sho was eleven. Who knew what he knew. He was just a kid and all of this…all of this was a lot for one little boy to deal with…so there were no hard feelings. Sho was dealing with a lot for a kid his age and…and he didn't know what was right and what wasn't in this situation…so Fukuda…he wouldn't bring anything up or press any issues. No. They were going to stick to what Sho knew.

And what he knew was hamsters.

"So that's one cup of sunflower seeds a day?" asked Fukuda. He wasn't over the moon about adding hamster tender to his list of duties but this was for Sho. Sho who was….not angry with him, it seemed, not angry enough to try and put him through a wall….but he did feel on edge….cagey…his aura was lashing out periodically…and Fukuda didn't blame him. He was just a kid and he couldn't be expected to understand all of why Fukuda had done…all the things he did…

And Fukuda had no idea how to explain it in words he could understand.

"Yeah…every single day. Sunflower seeds are their favorite snack but they like chia seeds, bird seeds, and the seeds from inside of tomatoes. They eat pretty much everything, actually….but don't give them poptarts because that much sugar is bad for them. They need fruits and vegetables and maybe plain popcorn but not with salt or butter because they're really little….are you getting all of this?" asked Sho. Fukuda was the last person he wanted to leave the hamster family with. It was his hamster family and…and he had been taking good care of them….but then dad had to go and come back and ruin everything! That was what he did…he just…he ruined things…

Every single good thing in Sho's life…dad just had to ruin.

He was off with baby sis right now probably trying to make her into a smaller version of dad or something. He knew his dad and he knew that the only person dad knew how to love was himself…and also big sis….but not baby sis! He could never love someone who saw through him! She saw through him. He didn't love her, he didn't even want her, that was why he had told Fukuda to take her away from their family and leave her with her mom. Dad…he didn't care…and Sho didn't even know why he'd come back. He knew why Fukuda was here, Minegishi had been sick or something, but there was no reason for…for any of them to get back.

Things had finally been good….and now they weren't…

"I'm listening. A cup of sunflower seeds once a day. Got it." Said Fukuda

"Make sure that they all get an equal share of the food. It helps if you feed them by hand." Said Sho

"We can feed them together. How about that?" asked Fukuda. This was, if anything, a good bonding activity for them. They needed something to do together…well they could always hang out and play videogames…or whatever else Sho wanted to do. He was so much taller now…and he smelled terrible…but he was still a kid and he must have still loved the same things that he'd always loved.

Though he and Sho hadn't spent time together in months.

"….it's not that hard. If you get stuck then you can call me and I'll do it as soon as I can." Said Sho. He knew what Fukuda was trying to do and he did not feel like hanging out with him. Why would he have wanted to? Fukuda made him lie to everyone, he took baby sis away when she had been a baby, and also…also Shimazaki said that Fukuda told him about how Sho was in love with him. Sho was proud of himself. He hadn't killed Fukuda.

Big sis would have been really mad at him if he killed Fukuda…or even beat him up really badly.

He had to think about big sis. She had enough to deal with. There was a part of him that wanted to yell at her, to scream at her, and to tell her that…well that she shouldn't have left…and that it wasn't fair that she got dad back and now he didn't have anyone…and that….that she needed to kick dad and Fukuda out again….at least then they would only have each other and their friends. Well their friends weren't like parents, even though Shimazaki was always saying that he thought of Sho as his own kid. Fukuda was like a parent, like a dad, and dad was their real parent…but they didn't need parents. They had each other…

Sho wished that he was an orphan…those kids were so lucky.

"Well it might be better if you show me, then I can see if I'm doing it right." Said Fukuda

"Fukuda, if you can't feed a bunch of hamsters then you're a moron." Said Sho

"Well then maybe I'm a moron." Said Fukuda. He forced himself to laugh. Sho…he hadn't cursed…so that was good. Sho hadn't been kidding around, no, that had been his serious voice….but at least…well at least Fukuda wasn't getting his ass kicked by an eleven year old right now. Sho was angry with him…but he was also getting older…so maybe he was getting more mature. Maybe they could put all of this behind them and get back to the way things used to be. Maybe at some point this whole summer would just turn into a distant memory….

And if not…well they could work through this together.

"Yeah, you are. Anyway I have to go home now. I have to make lunch for baby sis. Shibata's too busy moving furniture and stuff around, dad doesn't know how to make food that isn't ketchup bread, and big sis…she's really pissed that you're back and I don't want to piss her off any more. So….take good care of my hamster family….I guess." Said Sho as he got up to leave….and he would have left too if Fukuda hadn't grabbed him by the sleeve.

"Wait." Said Fukuda as he held onto Sho. He…this couldn't have been it. They hadn't seen each other in months and now Sho…he was just…leaving. He knew that there were hard feelings but…but Suzuki was back. He was back at the house and he wouldn't be doing any work today, he had said, not until he made amends with the baby. Sho was voluntarily going back home when his dad was there….

Fukuda had fucked up, and badly, if Sho wanted to voluntarily spend time with his father.

"What?" asked Sho as he pulled his sleeve free from Fukuda's hand. He wanted to reach over with the other hand and hit him so hard in the face that his hand broke. That was a thing that happened. You weren't supposed to hit people in the face, Shimazaki said, at least not with your fist. The human head was harder than the human hand. What you wanted to do was kick someone in the face, or even better stomp on the back of their head, that was a good way to either kill someone or at least make it so they never talked again. Mostly because of the brain damage. Well Sho…he didn't care if he ended up breaking his hand, there was just something satisfying about hitting someone in the face, not that he'd be hitting Fukuda in the face any time soon.

If he started he might not have been able to stop…and then big sis would have been mad at him for fighting and she had enough stuff to deal with as it was.

"You can stay here and have lunch. I have poptarts and coke." Said Fukuda

"Weren't you listening? I have to make lunch for baby sis too." Said Sho

"Bring her here then. What does she like? I bet-" said Fukuda

"Her mom probably wants to have lunch with her too." Said Sho

"Bring her mom then, the more the merrier." Said Fukuda

"Her mom probably wouldn't want to come over." Said Sho

"Why not?" asked Fukuda

"She probably doesn't like you. Nobody likes you." Said Sho. That was mean but it was the truth…and you had to tell the truth. Secrets were the worst. They were like…like when you got one of those weird sores on the inside of your mouth. That was what secrets felt like. They were these stinging, painful, things that existed inside of you and you couldn't ignore them no matter how much you tried. They just grew and grew and grew until you got rid of them. Sho was never keeping secrets, big ones anyway, ever again. He had his secrets…but he wasn't hurting anyone by not telling them that he had a stash of poptarts under his pillow, or that he sometimes only pretended to take baths, or that he was always thinking about Shimazaki and…stuff about him…well Fukuda knew…he knew the love parts, not the naked parts, and nobody needed to know about the naked parts! That was a secret that didn't hurt anyone so that was a secret that he was going to take to his grave!

But Fukuda needed to know that nobody liked him. He couldn't walk around thinking that people liked him…his feelings would have been hurt once he found out the truth.

"Oh come on…people like me." Said Fukuda. He could count the number of people he could call friends on one hand and still have room to spare. Higashio, Ootsuki, Suzuki….unfortunately, and Sho…well Suzuki had been very quiet since their fight…and Sho was justifiably angry with him…but still. People liked him, not a lot of people of course, but he was liked at least somewhat.

"Well yeah, my dad and those guys you hang out with sometimes….but not a lot of people like you and I don't think that baby sis's mom is going to like you that much. She's kind of serious a lot of the time and also…well she's busy anyway. She's got to watch baby sis so dad doesn't act like a jerk to her and she's got to help move stuff around in the house…so she doesn't have time to hang out with someone she doesn't even like…and stuff." Said Sho

"Oh. Well that's alright, not everyone in the world is going to like me. So long as we have each other then things are going to be just fine." Said Fukuda. That was his own way of asking Sho if they were ok…but maybe he should have been more direct. Sho's eye narrowed and his aura…well that was not good…Fukuda took a step back and braced himself. Sho was stronger than he should have been at his age, his powers were, and Fukuda…well he could heal but that didn't mean that he didn't feel pain when he got hurt.

"We have each other?" asked Sho. He was not going to hit Fukuda. Dozens of reasons….he had dozens of reasons to hit Fukuda…but also big sis wouldn't have liked that…and Fukuda had taken good care of him and stuff…but…well Fukuda had taken care of him when he'd been little. He wasn't little anymore so he didn't need Fukuda….but the thought of hitting him until he bled like he wanted to…if Sho did that then he wouldn't have been any different than dad. If Sho beat Fukuda up until he bled then…then he would just keep on doing that to people…and then when he grew up and had a son his son was going to watch between the gaps of his fingers and end up with nightmares for the rest of his life….

Sho wasn't dad. Sho was better. He had to be.

"Yes...well I have you. You're a kid and you don't have to be there for me but I-" said Fukuda

"I've got to go." Said Sho

"Wait, we could-" said Fukuda

"I don't want to hang out with you! Can't you get a clue already?! I don't want to hang out with you now or later or…or ever again!" said Sho

"You….you're just upset-" said Fukuda

"You're damn right I'm upset! I'm pissed off! I'm so pissed at you that…that if I were dad then I would have been beating you up since….since you got back…but I'm not dad. I'm not going to be like him…so I'm just going to go away." said Sho

"Sho...we need to talk. I know that what happened…it must have been so confusing for you-" said Fukuda

"No. Nothing's confusing. You made me lie to both of my sisters, you made me keep secrets, and you told my secrets...there's nothing confusing about that." Said Sho

"Sho…the things I did…all the things I did…were because I just…I wanted the best for you." Said Fukuda

"You told Shimazaki that I was in love with him. What the fuck…what the fuck made you think that telling Shimazaki that I was in love with him…just...fuck you!" said Sho. He kicked the wall. He wanted to kick Fukuda but instead he kicked the wall. The wall got a hole in it…it was like his old Swiss cheese wall…maybe he needed a new one. Better a Swiss cheese wall than hurting another person….and he wanted…he wanted to hurt Fukuda…

Even if they had been good friends at one point.

"How do you know about that?" asked Fukuda. He pulled at the collar of his sweater. Shimazaki…that moron! What…what had possessed him to tell Sho….what had…..what even went through that man's mind!? Telling Sho just made things awkward between the two of them….but this was Shimazaki he was talking about. He doubted that Shimazaki ever thought more than five seconds ahead.

"He told me! He….he told me that he knew that I was in love with him and…and don't ask me how he knew that I was in love with him! I don't want to talk about what happened and…and baby sis stole Minegishi's phone, not me!" said Sho

"…ok….I feel like there's a story there…but I won't ask you about that. That's none of my business. I just…let me explain." Said Fukuda

"Explain what? That you don't know how to keep secrets? You told dad about Emmy and you told Shimazaki how I felt…feel….felt…about him….you know what? I think that you just wanted me to keep secrets because you don't know how to." Said Sho

"Sho…listen. It was wrong of me to tell him that you-" said Fukuda

"Damn right!" said Sho

"-but I had no choice. He was dropping me from the sky. He was picking me up and dropping me-" said Fukuda

"That doesn't matter! You…you promised me that even if you got tortured…even if a bunch of bad stuff happened to you…you promised that you would never tell! But you did!" said Sho

"I-I'm sorry! Sho-fuck! Fuck…" said Fukuda. He shouldn't have said that. He needed to watch his language. Sho…he was like a mockingbird. He picked up on these things…but it didn't matter. He was long gone and it didn't look like he was coming back any time soon….or ever. Sho…he was very young and they hadn't seen each other in a very long time. Sho…was young and confused….and Fukuda….he was the adult here. He was the adult and….and he had to keep calm…and be understanding…

Sho was angry with him…and that was fine.

He was going to get this straightened out. He just…well if Sho wouldn't come to him then he was going to have to go to Sho. He would give Sho some time to cool down and then…well then he would explain himself and then things would get back to normal. Sho needed him. Sho needed someone in his life who had his best interests at heart, even if those best interests didn't always line up with what Sho wanted, and that person was Fukuda. He was going to have to take care of Sho…and not just because he promised Masami. He loved Sho…he loved Sho just like he would have loved his own son….

Even if he didn't want to play menagerie anymore…well that was fine. There were other things that they could do together….that was the only important part….that they were together.