raisons d'être

Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket.
Warnings: a bit of bad language
A/N: Nothing to say except THANK YOU to the people who reviewed! I really appreciate it.

xXx

FLIGHT- Chapter Two
The morning sun was bright and beautiful. Tohru woke with a smile on her face to the happy, shining light pouring in through her window. She was happy; who wouldn't be happy when they were as lucky as she was? Taking care of the three other occupants of the house might have seemed a daunting task, but in exchange for all their kindness she was more than happy to take it on.

She pulled on a skirt and a thin top and went down to make breakfast. It was still early, and the men were probably still asleep. But Tohru didn't mind; though she would never tell the others for fear of offending them or hurting their feelings, it was actually nice to get a bit of quiet time to herself. She liked the warm, peaceful silence that came with early morning.

Happily humming to herself, she gathered the things she would need for breakfast, and began preparing the meal. It took her by surprise when, only a minute or so later, a groggy figure came stumbling into the kitchen. "Ahh! Good morning Yuki-kun!"

Yuki rubbed tired eyes, and tried to force a small smile on his face. "Good morning Honda-san."

Tohru beamed brightly, and continued with her duties.

Yuki sat down, filling the silence with a wide yawn. "Where are the others?" he asked sleepily. "I'm usually the last one out of bed."

"I haven't seen either," Tohru replied. "Shigure-san is still sleeping, I believe, but Kyo-kun told me yesterday that he was going out early. Probably to see Shishou-san. He'll be home later, though."

"Lovely," Yuki replied sarcastically.

"Um... Do you think we should wake Shigure-san up? He's been sleeping for a very long time, and he might be hungry!"

Yuki shook his head. "Waking him up will only bring noise and nonsense, and I don't think I can handle that this early in the morning."

"Ahh. You're right Yuki-kun. Shigure-san is probably very tired if he is sleeping this much. We shouldn't disturb him. Have you noticed? Something has been bothering him lately; or perhaps it has been on his mind for a long time, and it's only just now bad enough to be noticeable." She looked at Yuki with pleading eyes. "You don't think something's wrong, do you?"

"Something's always wrong with him," Yuki muttered under his breath. But to Tohru he said, "I wouldn't worry, Honda-san. He's a big boy; he can take care of himself." He walked over to stand beside her, in case she needed any help.

"Yes. Of course you're right, Yuki-kun." She smiled.

"There's something about Shigure, though." Yuki continued, hoping to ease her mind. "I don't know why he does it, but you can be sure that he hides much of himself under that stupid attitude of his. Who knows– maybe he doesn't want us to know that he's an even bigger idiot than he seems to be. There's something... sinister about him, and you're right– it's starting to show."

"You... you don't really think that about him, do you Yuki-kun? He's been so kind to me, and... And I guess I try to think the best of him. Deep down, don't you think he's a kind person?"

"Of course he is, Honda-san,"Yuki said with a sigh. "Of course he is."

Akito clung to Kureno tightly, sitting snuggled in his lap. They were silent, her attitude sullen and bitter. Kureno stroked her hair softly, hoping to calm his tempestuous goddess. She was indeed a pathetic creature– a creature to be pitied. He knew she felt it, the pity that tied him to her. And she hated it; Akito resented it so much. But he was free, and he stayed. The bond, whatever it might have been, still meant something to him. She needed to believe that. She needed some fragile half-truth to hold on to, lest all her mind fall prey to darkness.

Something had happened the day before. Kureno knew it, but Akito wouldn't say a thing about it. Shigure– he must have done something, but Akito had no physical wounds, and if the abuse had been mental, it would never be drug out of her.

"Nngh," she grunted, sliding an arm around his neck and hoisting herself to a more upright position, "Kureno..."

"Yes?" he asked quietly, putting a gentle hand to her waist for support.

"I don't feel well. Not well at all. I'm going to need Hatori. You're... Just... just go. Just go."

Obediently, he stood and let her slide to the floor. Walking out of the room and off to find somewhere to amuse himself, he began to formulate a plan. Was there really danger? He didn't know how far he could trust Shigure, and keeping Akito sane was his first priority. She needed stability, and if that meant no more of the emotional upheavals Kureno had learned the Dog could cause, then so be it. He, if from nothing more than a sense of duty to her, the one he had nearly abandoned, would protect her as best as he could.

Hatori would be there shortly, she had been informed, and so there was nothing to do but wait. Akito sat, stewing in her anger. She was angry at herself– angrier at herself than she could remember being– but most of her rage was directed at him.

He always made her so angry. She had run away; she knew it. He made her so angry. She shouldn't have to run away, he should bend blindly to her will! He should be the one surrendering, the one who slinks away in defeat. But it was she- Akito, his GOD- who had hung her head and bolted. He... He made her so fucking angry!

He was like a virus; he was cruel; he took over everything. Her mind was infected by him- driving out all thought until all that was left was an intense, burning desire. He always made her burn. Deep inside her, where one would expect a soul to be, he laid his unquenchable fire. The flames consumed her very being, until in the throes of passion-driven anger, she had to scream, if just to distract him from his torture for a brief, fleeting moment.

And he knew it- he knew what he could do to her. (Didn't he? She was sure the vile bastard lived to torment her.) He would stare at her blankly, like he didn't care, or smirk at her like he knew something she didn't- like he was better than her. He, the fool that he was, better than her? Better than God? No, he was just pretending. He had to know how worthless he was.

But still her face burned in near-shame at her actions the previous day. He was the one to blame, though. He had pushed her until she couldn't take it.

She could still feel the pressure of his hand at her throat, feel the phantom bruises left on her wrists. His breath on her face was still warm and moist- his eyes still piercing and icy-hot. She could still, even then, feel the waves of unrestrained heat he had been emitting. He made her so hot; he made her so damn hot. He had been much too close; she had been so uncomfortable. But he still... Even in her memories he was magnificent. Even if she hated him for it (which she did), he had been magnificent. She could feel his heavy gaze on her, cutting through to bone. The very thought made her shiver.

Akito had wanted to get away so badly- to squirm and writhe to escape that heat. She could picture him exactly- from the fall of hair to the fit of his robe. The fit... of his... Yes, she could still see him, as stupid-looking as ever. He never did dress well- she was disgusted at how he so blatantly tried to show off his body. A smooth patch of chest could always be seen, viciously tempting her. She had trouble tearing her eyes away when he was that close. The jut of his collarbone fascinated her, and she had been possessed with the strange, irrational urge to taste it- trace it with her tongue, leaving the glimmer of warm, wet saliva on his skin.

And then, when he had leaned forward, the heat had made her whole body tremble with anticipation. She had hardly been able to stand it- she had wanted to hit him, slap him, make him get far, far away from her. And then she had... she had...

Akito sighed to herself raggedly. She had run away. Shigure was an idiot- a fool. She knew that. But that didn't stop him from getting deep under her skin. He was revolting- so offensive it made her sick. He wasn't nice at all; she hated him! That's right- she hated him. And no matter how hard he tried, she would never- EVER- break.

A voice broke through her thoughts. "Akito-san? I'm here."

She nodded, and the Dragon approached. "I'm not feeling well; I want you to fix it."

He sighed, and prepared to begin his examination. "What's the trouble? Do you know what's causing you to feel poorly?"

"Yesterday," she said bitterly.

He looked at her in confusion, a polite request for explanation.

Akito scowled. "Well, I meant that it started yesterday. I felt bad yesterday."

'Mm, that explains it,' Hatori thought. 'She's just pissy, not ill.' He wracked his brain, trying to think of any events of note that had taken place the day before. Coming up empty, he felt it best to just commence a subtle interrogation alongside his preliminary examination.

"Breathe in," he told her. She did as he asked. "So," he began, trying to appear conversational, "What put you in a bad mood yesterday?"

"What makes you think I was in a bad mood?"

"Isn't that why you don't feel well?"

She scowled deeper. "Maybe," she conceded. "It isn't like it was my fault at any rate. He pushed me to it. He's just lucky I didn't decide to punish him for his impudence."

"Of course," Hatori replied, a good amount of nonchalance in his voice.

"Saying such things... It was ridiculous! As though I'll let him get away with it. He used to be so... so different. He used to care. Now all he wants to do is destroy any happiness I might have."

Hatori stopped what he was doing. "What? Who?" He was fairly certain he knew exactly who she meant.

"That's... that's none of your business, Hatori! Shut up; I don't want to hear another word about it." She put a hand to his cheek tenderly, an icy chill running down his spine. "And you know what happens when you don't do what I tell you."

"Of course, Akito-san. As you wish."

'Shigure,' Hatori thought angrily, preparing to leave after the appointment with Akito. 'What the hell are you planning now?'

...to be continued...

-Author's Ramble: Whoo! Well, I don't know how this chapter turned out. I KNOW that the ending was weak, weak, weak. (But really... I was at a loss.) And the first scene prolly seems pointless. Well, it almost is, but there's one thing that I really needed to get across. I wanted to show that Shigure's perfectly-crafted mask is beginning to crack because of the strain his feelings for Akito put on him. If even Tohru notices, then obviously he's greatly affected. I don't know if I pulled that off, though. That's also what the first scene in the first chapter was for; well, it was similar in that it seemed pointless. I wanted to show then that Akito truly believes that Shigure doesn't love her. I don't know if anyone got that, either. Anyway, I thought the beginning of the third scene was good, so I guess that's alright. Please review and tell me what you think!

The only respite you ever receive is knowing you own him; he can't ever leave.