It was October 30th, and Alice was having a real dilemma.

Was she going to attend the Hatter's Not-So-Scary Halloween Tea Party, which he had made up that year and been raving about, or was she going to sneak off with the Tweedles to a haunted house?

Or… supposed haunted house?

Haunted or not, it would have been reckless, but-

"HellooOoo?" A familiar voice soared over her head - definitely Hatter's. As his fuzzy, grey hand waved in front of her face, Hare came to an unfortunate conclusion:

"Uh oh, I think Alice is broken again." She set down the maple leaf shaped sugar cookie that she'd been hovering near her mouth and squinted.

"Smelling salts, Hare! We need 'em! Quick!" Hatter insisted, even though she was looking point blank at both of them.

"I'm afraid I don't have any!"

"WHAAAAAT? But Hare, you have to have EVERYTHING!" Nothing about it sounded demanding: it was pure disillusionment on Hatter's part, that his partner wouldn't have everything, especially something as basic as smelling salts, in his pockets. "Hare, I'm disappointed in you," he said.

By now, Alice was waving her hand in front of the Hatter's face. "You guys, I don't need to smell any salts," she tried to make clear to them. After Hatter realized that she was definitely conscious (and getting annoyed), he still found himself frowning.

"Well maybe not, but Rabbit has to smell salts at least thrice a day, so somebody should have them."

Hare shifted his eyes around. "Since when are you so concerned about Rabbit's needs? And hey, why not you?!"

"I can't!"

"Why not?!"

"You know very well! I have no space left in my pockets. This one's all sugar," he started, patting his left hip, "and this one's cheese."

"Cheese?!" Alice finally decided to participate in the conversation and ask, since it clearly wasn't going to end and was getting far too confusing (even for one who was not interested) to bear.

"For the Dormouse," Hare explained.

"Awww. You keep treats for him?"

"Bribes are more what they are," Hatter admitted. Both his tablemates went quiet. "Oh, sure, judge me all you want. They work, and that's all that matters. Anyway, Alice, you are coming to my Halloween tea party tomorrow evening, right?!"

Even more silence followed.

Alice felt cornered. "Oh yeah, totally."

Not long after, she was in the same corner, with the Tweedles. "Oh yeah, I'm totally coming to the haunted house with you… eheheheh… Why wouldn't I?!" Her tone was not as convincing in their opinions, and Dum was sure he knew why.

"Maybe because there might be… ghosts?!" He jumped all up in her business, making her flinch.

"No!" She insisted.

"Please, brother: put your trolling to rest, already. She's a scientist. She doesn't believe in ghosts," was Dee's very dry chide.

"I didn't say that either!"

"So then you'll help us use all of the equipment we bought!" He need not even pause to see if Alice was interested: she had already straightened up with a twinkle in her eye, so he whipped a catalogue out from his back pocket. "So we bought this, this, this, and this."

"Oh, and this," Dum practically threw himself into their laps to point at some trench-coats. "In a large and a small."

"Extra-small, Dee corrected.

"Oh… yeahh…. eheheh… we got one for you too, Alice."

"A large and two extra-smalls," Dee kept correcting. He also wedged his shoulder under Dum's chin and gently shoved him out of the way. "Anyway, this camera detects heat, and this recorder picks up on all kinds of low frequency sounds, so if a ghost's talking to us, we'll know."

Alice was just about positive, now, that she wasn't interested in Hatter's tea party. Not with all this fascinating crap, which she was sure her parents would never let her use on her own.

"This is going to be a-MAZ-ing," she emphasized.

"What's going to be amazing?" Everyone heard. Unbeknownst to anybody, Hare had been hustling by with a whole shopping list of things he had to worry about. Under such circumstances, he might not have stopped to be nosy, but Alice practically shouted it.

"Uh," she continued, much less emphatic. Hare just blinked as the three of them stared back from the top of the bridge, where they had been huddling. Dum only missed two, maybe three beats at most before he knew exactly what to say:

"The tea party tomorrow!" Alice sort of danced in place and shook her head, as if Dum was right on the money.

"Awww, well I'm glad you're looking forward to it. Gosh, I can't wait to see your costumes! Actually, I also can't wait for you guys to see my costume!" Hare's bubbling laughter was followed by a gasp when he realized they were holding a catalogue. "Alice! Are the Tweedles helping you with yours?!"

Several beats were missed again, as Alice realized this lie was about to get complicated. In fact, she was just on her way to saying she needed no help at all, but up shot Dum again, to come to what he believed was her rescue. "Yes! We're picking out what she needs right now!"

Hare looked both ways and stuffed the shopping list inside his jacket, so he could shuffle towards them with his fingers tented. "Oh do tell!" Everybody stood up now that he was getting so close, and Dee slapped the catalogue to his chest, but now Hare could see the cover image, and he was all about it. "OGHHH, that looks like a fascinating publication you have there. I love spooky stuff. Can I just- can I- do you mind if I-"

Try as he may, Hare couldn't seem to find the right angle to pry it from Dee's chest. It was hopelessly, rather suspiciously embedded, and things were quickly getting awkward. "Oh wait a minute," Hare said to the group, eyes glassy and out of focus for a moment. "I've got that same edition." From the other side of his jacket, he pulled out his own rolled up copy. "Yeah, I picked it up at the Wobuck store. 'How to Make Contact with the Dead'," he read aloud matter-of-factly. "I mean, I just bought it for shits and giggles- oh gosh," he said, as he realized he had sworn in front of Alice. "I meant craps and chortles."

"Look, Hare, we have to be going," Dee explained, after not so discreetly pinching the bridge of his nose. "And it's not what it looks like."

"Yeah, we just bought it for craps and chortles too," Dum threw in, which just made his brother scrunch up his face. Alice had covered up half of hers, trying not to laugh. All the while, Hare had turned a little, just to side-eye them.

"Oh," he said. "I see." He winked so hard that it looked like he was trying to clamp something down with his eyelids. "I won't mention a thing to Hatter."