My Happiness, My Heartbreak
Author's Notes: I hope this chapter turns out alright. This story is so…winding that it's difficult yet exciting to write.
I also hope that things aren't too confusing.
Disclaimer: All characters and places are property of the manga-ka CLAMP and companies related to it. Only the plot and story is my intellectual product.
Chapter Three: The Story of Sakura
"I was born twenty-two years ago, sometime in March or April, I think."
Sakura Kinomoto found herself saying the terrible autobiography that she had formed in her mind since that destiny-changing day. That was strange, and yet she couldn't stop the course of things. Just like she couldn't stop the course of all that was happening.
Earlier that day, Sakura remembered waking up to a sneeze. She learned his name… 'Li', he said. Li. Short and simple. She brought Li-san to a random doctor that she found in the yellow pages, and was glad that he didn't ask any questions about what had happened.
The doctor was a kind, middle-aged man. Dr. Terada was his name, and Nurse Rika. They both commended Sakura for her first-aid work, giving them prescriptions and some free bandages, as well as advice for resting and feeding. Li didn't complain at all.
Even so, Sakura wasn't too comfortable relating her hidden, shadowed tale with a complete stranger, but there was something in those intriguing and even more mysterious amber eyes that compelled her greatly.
Those same eyes were staring intently at her, listening to every syllable and watching her speak. There was a silence that surrounded him, such a loud and mystic silence that Sakura couldn't explain.
"My father, mother and elder brother were supposed to be really excited. They always wanted to have a baby girl in the family, so they were impatient. It turned out to be okay, except that my mother…" Sakura continued, then paused for a moment. "…contracted a serious, rare infection. Some kind of scientific name, but I forgot."
She sneaked a peek at her companion, and found him still staring at her from where he was sitting on the chair in front. At this point she bowed her head down in deep, faraway memories.
"My father said she was always happy, even after she got that infection. She lived with it for three years, then collapsed suddenly while she was playing with me at home…when she got to the hospital, it was too late."
She spent a few moments reliving that sunny afternoon…just her and her mother, then-
As she lifted her eyes up again, she was greeted by a brief flash of sympathy that ran across Li's face, but this was quickly reclaimed again by his indifferent expression.
"If that wasn't enough, something happened when I was seven. We were eating dinner during the evening when there was a loud crash at the door. We all ran to see what had happened, but I tripped down the stairs in my hurry…the last things I saw of my father and brother were their feet going down the steps."
Li was caught by Sakura bearing a peculiar look on his face…a mix of emotions like pity, anger, dullness and interest. This made Sakura go on when she hated the story the most.
"There was a bright silver light that made me see who was at the door…a small shadow that I couldn't see the face of. Then I heard my father's voice crying out, then my brother calling out my name before yelling in pain as well."
At this point Li's blank face flooded with a wave of feelings. His warm-colored eyes had widened quite a lot and his mouth was half-open to breathe in more air - his hands had gone straight to his head in the sign of a migraine, and he stumbled off the chair.
"Li-san!" Sakura called, worried. Rushing to catch him before he fell, she checked his bandages and saw that they were bleeding. "Are you alright? What hurts? Does anything hurt?"
Li's lips closed…his eyelids fell heavily, and all that could be heard was his sharp breaths. "Yes" Was his straight to the point, no explanations answer.
Sighing deeply, Sakura carried him to the bed with ease: he was still as weightless as a child. Checking the white cloths for any red stains and finding none, she settled in the same chair she slept in the night before and took to watching over her new roommate.
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Touya clenched his teeth in frustration. Who was that 'Li' person that Sakura was talking about?
Sighing, he ignored whatever his peculiar tenant was up to and went back to work: counting revenue, accounting for bills, doing his rounds, burning the bills, and overall not doing too much. His next part-time job was tomorrow.
"Strange little Sakura…"
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Everything was a great, pain-bringing blur. There was nothing he could remember too clearly at this point, but whatever it he was certain it was important. Very important.
For the second time in the day, he awoke to the sight of his 'savior' of sorts - but this time, she was wide awake, the expression on her face betraying concern and alertness.
Then suddenly all his senses came flooding back. There was the striking suddenness of his injuries coming back to feeling, a terrible headache, the freezing temperature of an ice-pack and…something else.
A horrible, unimaginable knowing. A forbidden awareness.
Most people called it Guilt.
"Are you awake, Li-san?"
That voice. So familiar. Sakura-san.
"I guess you are. You better just lie down then." Sakura told him, once again assuming the authoritative air that had enough indifference to be unreadable - and sometimes, unbearable.
"Kinomoto-san, if" Li began to say, but was cut abruptly off. "No, you really must rest. Your wound has gotten a bit worse than before, so I'd suggest to don't move too much."
At this point the clock struck half-past-twelve. "It's lunch time. Would you like to eat anything?"
Even if Li might have appreciated a good meal, what he had found out about that girl was sickening. He felt a deep, hollow sense of pity for her, yet was amazed at how she could have survived such ordeals.
"No." He replied.
Slightly annoyed at the impolite response, Sakura just clenched her teeth and exited her unit. She was thankful that Touya-san was kind enough to be willing to share his meals with the tenants, and was relieved that she wouldn't have to request for another set of food anyway.
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"Looks like it's only the two of us then." Touya Mitokono said, eyeing her as she descended from the final step of the staircase. "Yes, it seems like it is so." Sakura answered, retaining her infamous monotone.
Shrugging at her irritating formality, Touya simply brought out a few dishes, put back a number inside the general refrigerator, and returned all the other water glasses to the counter. He was a very careful man.
"Are you sure it'll be only the two of us?" He dared to ask, still suspicious of Sakura's unusual self-talk in her apartment. As far as Touya was concerned, Sakura never spoke to herself, even at home.
Tensing a little bit, she shook her head. "All the other tenants are out."
Touya began to nibble at his rice bowl, but while doing so kept a scrutinizing eye on Sakura. She didn't notice.
She didn't even want to eat lunch, yet she forced herself to partake in the food. Despite the calling aroma, the otherwise wonderful smell gave her a wave of nausea. The sauce in the meat resembled blood.
After finally getting through her white rice and vegetables, she excused herself from the table. Raising an eyebrow, her landlord asked, "Aren't you hungry still? You just took a small bowl and a few fried vegetables."
Shaking her head, she said her respects before disappearing up the stairs.
Brushing his hair with his hands in frustration, Touya took a deep breath before going on with his meal with a few more furrows on his forehead.
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Opening the swinging door very carefully, she peered into the room. Her 'guest' was asleep: she would have to take extra care not to wake him, or cause him any more stress.
Closing the door behind her, she took effort to make her steps light and soft. The ice-pack that she put on Li had melted a little, and so it fell on the floor beside the bed.
Putting the ice-pack to the side, she reclined again on her chair. Watching him, she felt a little peace…she almost forgot all the complications that brought her to this.
Sakura was already half-asleep when a sharp rapping came at the door. Groaning in irritation, she stood up quickly and rushed to answer the knock. Casting a glance at Li, she was glad he didn't wake up.
"Sakura-sama…" Touya-san mocked in a strange, low voice, increasing the volume his knocks, "I brought your room service for you."
Gulping deeply, she hastily draped a blanket over Li's sleeping figure, covering him up with pillows as mufflers. Satisfied with her makeshift work, she hurriedly received the man.
Touya Mitokono certainly didn't look normal with a bright smile on his normally annoyed face. His features were too cheerful to be normal. Sakura herself thought that she was imagining.
"Sakura-sama, I thought you'd like your lunch served in your room, so I brought it up here. Enjoy your meal!" Continued the unusually high-spirited bachelor, grinning even wider.
The tray was something Sakura had never seen. It was a porcelain piece, certainly not a crafted fake. The plates were antique china, and what was on the plates was even more astonishing.
Croquettes and pastries. Served with side cherry garnish and dragon tea.
Hearing a pained moan from under the sheets, Sakura put on her own Act II. "Why, thank you Touya-san." The twenty-two year old girl said, taking the loaded tray. "I appreciate it, my teddy bear is sick and his favorite foods are pastries. See you later."
Before he could even question the sudden sound (or the part about ailing stuffed toys), the door -his door- was slammed in the landlord's face. The pleasant, hotel-servant-like mask fell off, revealing a greatly irritated expression. "Whatever that was, Sakura-sama," Touya whispered to himself as he descended the stairs, "I'll find out sooner or later."
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Letting out a long exhalation, she ran to the bed to remove all the heavy stuff from Li. Sakura had forgotten that it was enough to suffocate anyone, especially a sleeping, wounded person.
As she flung off the last sheet she was immediately relieved. Certainly enough, Li had been roused from his sleep none-too-gently, and his eyes were still half open, but he was fine enough.
Still, Sakura knew that appearances could be deceiving. "Are you alright?" she inquired, overlooking the fact that her shroud of unconcern was not placed back on.
"Yes." Li always had such a simple way of speaking, one would have wondered if he talked in simple syllables alone.
Sakura sighed, unfolding a table that she tucked under the bed, and setting the tray of food unto it. She still wasn't hungry, even with the tantalizing whiffs of baked goods, but Sakura was sure that Li would like some.
Nudging the table close to him without a word, she resettled herself at the foot of the bed, finding the chair a little too inadequate for the time being.
She sat, and waited. There was no movement or response from the mysterious stranger, Li. He remained as still as a statue, looking up to the ceiling with an extremely blank expression. Sakura tried to be patient, but the deafening silence was too much.
"Go ahead and eat if you want."
Seconds passed. Minutes passed.
Sakura was on the verge of giving up when she felt a sudden dip in the weight of the bed. Li sat upright, moved close enough to the edge of the mattress, and picked up a croquette. He ate in tiny nibbles, taking only miniscule sips of the tea.
Despite these, Sakura was content. They had survived their first day undiscovered…but there were more close calls to come, and more surprises in store.
"I was alone ever since. No one took care of me. I took care of myself." Sakura murmured to him as he lay back down. Thus she concluded her story.