Disclaimer: InuYasha and all its characters belong to Rumiko Takahashi. Wahhhhhh!T-T

Chapter 11

He recovered himself almost as soon as he had cried out. Kagome wanted to be with Naraku so why fear? Wasn't part of caring letting go? He would have just looked away and let him have her, if it were Koga. At least he knew she'd be alive for a while, but this was Naraku and Naraku liked to try to kill Kagome. He had tried at least twice. Tsubaki and Kohaku. Naraku would kill Kagome now that he had a chance, and Kagome had the jewel shards. He couldn't let Naraku have them.

But something still kept him from running ahead and getting her. She had been able to get back to sleep that morning and her quiet moans and breathless name calling was still in his mind. Naraku. How did he know now that Kagome was alone with him she wouldn't give him the shards, sleep with him, and when he came in say Naraku had stolen the shards and raped her as the demon escaped? Could he trust her to keep the jewel shards safe?

"What are you waiting for InuYasha?" asked Shippo from his shoulder, "We have to save Kagome!"

Kagome? Who cared about some weak human girl? The only reason he was heading after Naraku was for the jewel shards. Kagome could stay with Naraku for all he cared. He wanted the jewel.

"LET ME GO, YOU STUPID PUPPET!"

"I'm afraid I am no puppet, my dear Kagome. I am the real thing."

Kagome went stiff and swallowed. "Wh-what do you want with me?"

Naraku chuckled coldly as he stopped outside a cave and put her on her feet in front of him. "I think you know."

Alarm bells went off in her mind. "N-no I don't. Give me a hint."

"Ah, Kagome." The man wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her into his chest, and covered her with the baboon fur. "You will be such fun. So much fire." He sniffed her neck before slipping his tongue over her skin. "Much better than Kikyo. Even InuYasha agrees. His scent is strong here. Tell me, have you slept with him yet?"

Kagome tried to push herself away from him, but she couldn't escape his grasp. "I don't see how that is any of your business!"

"I want to know if I will be taking your virginity or not. Is that so hard to understand?"

She flushed as he pulled her closer to him, his arms safe around her waist. Stupefied, she didn't move when he began to kiss her neck, but she was panicking. Where was InuYasha? Why wasn't he there yet? What was she going to do if he didn't come?

"Am I to take it I will be?" His voice was low and husky and dangerous.

She couldn't move. Was she under some kind of spell? What was wrong with her? She leaned her head to one side and she felt Naraku smile on her skin. There was a feeling building up in her stomach, hot and immediate. He was causing it, she knew it was him. She had never felt anything like it.

Oh no. She had. The morning after the first dream with him. She turned around so she faced him in the embrace and grinned her widest before she let out what had been building up inside her. Naraku released her in disgust as the vomit hit his face and coated his chest. She smiled as she choked up the last bit, pouring it where Naraku's feet had been a moment before. She chuckled evilly as her captor tried to clean himself up. He wasn't happy, that's for sure.

"I'm soooo sorry, Naraku," she said stiffly, "but I can't stand being within ten feet of you because I get nauseous and touching you makes me barf. I don't think I'd be a very good lover. You'd have to bathe a hundred times a day. Now, will you let me go?"

Naraku smiled coldly and Kagome's hope of winning was defeated. Naraku wasn't going to give up that easily. She was still in panic mode and Naraku's placid face wasn't helping. She suddenly had it in her mind to run and she did for a few feet before she hit a barrier, the translucent mirror flexing and bending slightly where she touched, warping the outside view. Naraku's barrier, one of the strongest in existence. As Naraku smiled at her as she ran her hand over the surface, she felt more panic. She was locked in with a monster and he had the only key. She felt tears roll down her cheeks, hot and slow, mingling with sweat. Why wasn't Inuyasha there yet? What if...what if he wouldn't come? What if he was so sure she wanted Naraku that he wouldn't come? Were the jewel shards enough for him to try?

Was there nothing she could have done earlier to make him know what was going on? Had she been wrong in hiding that from him? Now, because of that foolishness, that stubbornness, she was going to be stuck here with Naraku, touched indecently, and worse, and there was nothing she could do to stop it. The best she could truly do would be to somehow allow the part of her that was Kikyo to rise up and control her so she wouldn't have to live through it. Perhaps that was cowardly, but she had never said she was even half as brave as InuYasha, or Miroku, or Sango, or even Shippo. She was just a frightened little girl that could have some brave moments when she saw others in danger. When she was in danger, she always relied on InuYasha to save her. What kind of person was she? A coward. A yellow bellied coward that got her friends in trouble because she couldn't defend herself or help herself. Kikyo was right, and so was InuYasha. She was weak and stupid and pathetic and, and, and just plainly a child! A child, a baby, useless. InuYasha sure knew her to a 't'. She was just a stupid wench.

But this stupid wench was going to fight back.

She lifted herself off of the ground and wiped away her tears. They could only serve to give Naraku the pleasure of knowing she was faltering and that he was getting to her. She would not allow that. Somehow, she would help herself, or at least stall until InuYasha finally arrived. 'Until', not 'if'. He would come, if only for the shards. She would show him that she wasn't as weak as he thought she was. She would prove to them all that she could take care of herself. Hopefully.

She studied the situation. Naraku hadn't made a move, she was at the edge of a barrier, rescue may, or may not, be on its way, and she had to somehow get Naraku to either drop the barrier or leave. That didn't sound too hard. Step one, lull him into a false sense of security.

"Naraku?" She turned to him.

"Yes, my dear?"

Her mind was racing. "Is there any way I could somehow get something to eat? It may help settle my stomach."

"There's food inside the cave, if you would lead the way."

"But the fresh air will also help my stomach. I'd like to have it settled before-"

"Kagome, Kagome, Kagome," he sighed in a chiding tone. "Do you think I am such a fool as to allow you out of my sight for even a moment? We are still enemies in your thinking after all."

"That may have something to do with the fact that you have tried to have me killed several times."

"You were on the wrong side, my dear, but do not worry. The attempts on your life will cease, " he paused, "on a condition."

"What kind of," she gulped as Naraku came closer, "condition?"

"You no longer side with Inuyasha, help me find all the jewel shards, and, of course, become my lover." He said it like it was obvious. "Of course, I cannot promise the same treatment for your friends. I cannot allow myself to be killed so easily. It would look so very bad, don't you agree?"

"I...suppose."

"So, do we have a deal?"

"I'm afraid that I cannot ever, no matter the motivation, side with you. It goes against everything I believe in. The innocent shouldn't have to pay for evil to gain more power. It is just plain wrong."

"Sticking to your values, eh?" Naraku chuckled as his hand ran along her cheek. "I didn't see such dedication in Kikyo. You have such a fire about you," he leaned in and kissed her cheek. "Such a beautiful fire. So different from Kikyo's ice. You would be much better, of that I have no doubt." He pulled away and grinned widely. "It's a pity I'll have to kill Inuyasha when he comes to get you. I'm sure he'll be so glad to know you betrayed him and gave me the jewel shards."

As he spoke he grabbed the bottle from the cord around her neck. She grabbed his hand before it got too far. "I will not, under any circumstances, allow these jewel shards to enter your possession. It's my responsibility to protect them and I will, even if I have to purify you to do it."

"So purify me, little miko. I'd love to see you try. I am much stronger than the last time you tried."

"Really?"

He grinned for a moment before she began to tap into her powers, following Kikyo's training to the letter. It didn't come with the resistance she had expected, but willingly flooded her. She was careful as she focussed it through Naraku from the had she held to her hold on his other arm. The form of Naraku convulsed violently before she released him and allowed him to fall to the floor. He was panting and babbling incoherently under his breathe. A part of her, the Kikyo part, told her to kill him now, before he recovered and killed her, but the other part of her knew that the honour had been reserved for InuYasha or Miroku or Sango when they had been wronged and discovered Naraku's deceptions. She had no right to kill him, not even to avenge Kikyo's deaths. She wasn't Kikyo.

The barrier lowered as Naraku whined and she felt pity for the abomination. She hoped InuYasha would come and put the thing out of its misery, though a part of her thought that InuYasha would have qualms about finishing off her opponent. Perhaps he would want to wait for another day, for the fight he had been preparing for this last year and a half. InuYasha deserved his head, even if she could easily take it now. She didn't want the head, nor the life; she wanted Naraku to suffer, and suffer he would, even if she had to do this a million times until the hanyou found her. InuYasha would be so proud if she tortured him.

She knelt down and took hold of a hand and placed a hand on his back. "Naraku, you poor, poor thing. Do you see now all the pain you have caused all those you have made to suffer? Do you feel it?" She let another wave of purifying energy through him and she laughed as he trembled, helpless on the ground. She stopped the flow. "Do you, you vile creature? Oh? You want me to stop? How do you think we feel when you torture us by bringing back Kohaku or destroying another innocent village? Do you stop? Will you ever stop? I truly doubt it Naraku. You are the worst kind of scum there is. I would kill you right now if the honour hadn't been claimed by InuYasha oh so long ago. The first day he heard your name from Miroku, actually. I can't deny him that pleasure, now can I? That would be so cruel. Much too cruel, don't you agree?"

"Kagome?"

"It speaks! The creature wishes to beg? Beg for forgiveness from your mistress, won't you? Come on, beg. Be a good evil creature and beg." She paused as the form below her whimpered, impassive and grinning. Naraku didn't deserve this. He deserved much, much worse. But what more could she do? She didn't have the authority to say he should die, even if it was common knowledge. Besides, killing him would avenge Kikyo's death. Why should she avenge what she was glad was gone? Kikyo dying left Inuyasha for her, and her alone. "Come, my creature, speak again, or do you loath your life so much that you wish it to end? Do you desire this pain for I shall not kill you. It is not my death to deal. InuYasha has claim to that. And Miroku, and Sango too, but not me. I leave the honour for them. Can you understand that?"

"Kagome, stop this."

"You dare to speak to me in InuYasha's voice? Do you think that will gain you pity?" She laughed now, coldly and cruelly. It sent a chill up even her spine. "It will only serve to prolong your suffering. But you want that, don't you, you sadistic, abhorrent creature, imperfect blend of man and demon? That has always been what you have wanted. The pain, the anger, our hate fed you, didn't it? We made you stronger, you poor thing. You couldn't help but feed on that, could you?" Her mood and tone were now soft and sad. "I pity you, creature. You can not have helped your creation. You did not ask to come into this world, did you? You are not as Onigumo intended, so long ago. He desired me then, then you, then you desired me, this form, this body, this soul... This soul, this no longer pure soul. You have done well in tainting it." She paused as a sob broke through and tears flowed down her face. "What threat am I now? A tainted miko..."

She stopped and removed her hands from Naraku, turning her eyes away from the body. "Tainted? Is that what I have become? Defiled, un-pure, vile? Am I any better than you? Have my hands not caused all these deaths? Was it not my arrow that broke the jewel? Am I not the cause of Shippo's parents dying and Sango's village being destroyed? Some say the jewel shards, I say, I am the cause of the jewel shards, I am the jewel shards, I caused so much suffering. What kind of miko is that? Am I even worthy of calling myself a miko?" She paused and swallowed hard. "Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Have I been blind to that? Have I been doing my best to help this world? Have I been helping? It feels as if I am the cause of all this." She was barely whispering.

"Kagome..." The voice of Inuyasha once more.

"Kagome!" Shippo?

"Lady Kagome." Miroku?

"Please Kagome," Sango? "let down this barrier."

She turned her head away from her hands and towards the voices, behind her. She froze when she saw her friends there, standing beyond a glowing pink barrier. Sango, with Shippo on her shoulder next to Miroku, all beside and behind InuYasha, golden eyes hurt and pain filled. They had heard it all, every word, every action, everything. They were all shocked and sad and hurt and, and...

She clutched to the red jacket as a lifeline, holding it so tightly she was sure she would never let go. She was crying too, wailing really, and saying 'I'm sorry' endlessly under her breathe, as if it were a chant to save her soul, her life, herself. She could feel that evil that had held her slipping away finally, away into the ever lasting dark abyss that claimed all things eventually. It wasn't what she had wanted, truly. She hadn't meant for it to happen, really. Really I didn't. Believe me, please? Please? I'm so sorry, so sorry, so sorry. Please, don't leave me. Please stay with me. Please? Please? What have I done? Please stay? Please?

Please..?

I would like to apologize to my readers who have been waiting for updates for the last few months, but I had some technical difficulties. I will, therefore, be updating most of my fics and put some of them on hold, meaning only that they'll be updated slower. I would like to apologize for the delay and wish to assure you it will not happen again in the near future. Thanks. SY