The 1st Annual Fannie Awards Chapter 4: Best Minor Character, a kim possible fanfic

"So many stories focus on the main characters, as they should. They are the main characters for a reason. But some people like to bring the lesser stars to the forefront, giving them a chance to shine just as brightly!"

"There are just so many characters there with so much room to grow. You did it with Bonnie and Tara, I did it with Monique and Brick. Oh, and we can't for my favorite girl of all, cause she is here to present. Giving out the award for Best Minor Character are Sensei and Nooni!"

Sensei, his arm through Nooni's arm, enter in from the right of the stage, pausing briefly as Nooni stops to give a kiss to both Matt and Jason. Approaching the podium, the two bow briefly to the crowd.

Sensei cleared his throat, and the room went quiet. "The river running deeply provides the greatest bounty."

Nooni just groaned, pulling the microphone away. "You speak too strange, the round eyes no understand. And what this me being minor character, huh? Nooni no minor. Jason and Matt have much explaining to do."

"Nooni, perhaps you might speak with them after the awards? And the nominees are…

Bonnie, by Zaratan of Bonnie's Curse…

It started innocent enough. A comment to slow someone down, just enough to disrupt events. A carefully placed word, and I was able to help, to change things for the better. And then, just being the bitch became a part of me. The headaches didn't help, nor the lack of sleep, in giving me the grumpy mood to maintain the illusion. And at first, it was all good, it was like playing a game. But as the "game" evolved, I lost friends. You know how lonely it is, to have to be the bitch all the time. Hell, at one low point, I even considered suicide. Now that was fun when I got the flash on that one. And that's when I told Tara, because I needed someone, anyone that I could talk to. The stress was getting to be too much, and I needed someone I could talk to, someone who could help relieve the pressure I was feeling. She didn't believe it at first, but it's not hard to convince someone, so long as they're willing to listen. She's the only one I've ever trusted with this, the only one who might understand. Sure, Kim might, but this rivalry thing would prevent her from ever listening to me.

Nooni, by mattb3671 of The Biggest Mission Ever…

"Note to self: put hair in ponytail before wrestling." she mumbled. She slipped Ron's jersey over her head, and at that exact moment, the temple door opened and a slight body slipped in.

Kim gasped dropping the shirt to the floor, covering her breasts with her arms. She recognized the culprit.

"Master Lunch Lady!" she started, maybe a bit to loudly.

The wizened old lady looked Kim over from head to toe. She was carrying a tray holding a small bowl of rice porridge, some assorted glass bottles in odd shapes, and some black clothes folded neatly. She placed it on the vanity.

"What wrong with hair? Look like you fight with monkey all night." She blurted out in broken English. "And you too skinny. Need to eat more."

Kim's eyes popped open. Not only was Master Lunch Lady speaking English, she was hen-pecking her. Like her Nana did.

"Close mouth. You catch flies mouth open like that," Master Lunch Lady continued, "…you hungry?"

"…uh, no, not right now. Maybe later…" Kim managed to get out.

"Fine. We take bath first. Come get in tub." Master Lunch Lady commanded, walking past Kim to the tub. She turned, standing beside it, and tapped her foot, waiting.

"…ah, well…" Kim stammered. Did this lady think she was gonna get all naked in front of her?

"No have all day. Come, come, get in bath. Young American girl parts no different than old Japanese woman parts. Seen it before. No big. Hurry up!" Master Lunch Lady said, using the 'Mother' tone.

"Hmph!" Kim grunted like a child.

Master Lunch Lady's thin eyebrow rose as if to say 'YOUNG LADY… '.

Kim sighed, stomping over to the tub, arms still crossed over her bosoms. She looked at the elder woman. "Won't you even close your eyes?" she pleaded.

"Why close eyes? Then I no can see, that just silly. In. Tub. Go!" Master Lunch Lady's foot tapped louder.

Kim gave in, quickly grabbing her underpants, sliding them down. She jumped into the tub in a flash (no pun intended), hastily sitting down, her back to the old woman.

Master Lunch Lady had stealthily produced a wooden bucket from behind the tub, which, quite speedily, she filled with water, promptly dumping it over Kim's head, drenching her.

"GAH! What are you doing! First you force me into in to a tub, naked, and then you try and drown me? Master Lunch Lady!" Kim wailed.

"Hair has to be wet to be cleaned. Stop squawking, little bird." cackled the older lady. "And no more 'Master Lady' name. That what Stoppable-san call me. You call me Nooni now. It my name… but don't tell Stoppable-san. Me like to pull his chain."

Tara, by RavenStarfire of Replacement…

"And all the while, I acted the shy, timid Tara at school. The one who was always third. All while I planned my own revenge... Then I got it. After her comments in the cafeteria after that day, I came to Barkin's class early and told him a few things Bonnie had allegedly "said" about him – some which were true, some which were partially false, and some that were outright lies altogether. Oh, the look on his face when she walked in the room…oh, damn, you had to be there!" Tara laughed. "Priceless. He suspended her, which pissed off her family, so she ran from her home - and Drakkie picked her up… And now, by getting rid of you, Kim – and Shego –I'll not only get to decide who the new cheerleader on the squad will be, I'll make sure I stay on top – and I'll cement myself as the most dangerous woman in the world. Drakkie and I have a real humdinger of a wedding and honeymoon planned after all this!"

Jason and Matt are anxiously dancing beside the stage, as Sensei takes up the envelop. Occasionally, they glance at the other, glaring slightly.

"And the winner is… Nooni AND Bonnie!

With glee, both hosts storm over to the podium, pushing slightly to get at the single award.

"I'd like to thank… quit shoving… everyone who enjoyed my portrayal of Bonnie, and.. HEY!"

"Oh please, you probably got the sympathy vote for putting this together. Nooni was an almost original creation of mine, and has… stop that… has become popular with other writers, and… OWW!"

Nooni grabbed both Matt and Jason by the ears, tugging sharply and twisting, forcing them to the floor. "Fighting stupid, both won! Matt, you friend, Jason, you date, but bicker like child. Stops now! Both are grateful to all who voted for them, and honoured by award. Now, back to work!"

Nooni gave one final twist before letting them go, and both quickly slumped to the floor. Sensei and Nooni gave one last bow to the crowd before returning to their seats in the crowd.

Jason, rubbing his ear, grumbles all the way to his feet. "You know, this is your fault. If you hadn't…"

"Me, she's your date! You should be the one to…"

"CHILDREN!"

Both Matt and Jason cringe as she raises her voice to them. Matt just swallows his fear down a bit. "Umm… let's welcome our next performer. Here's R Kelly, with I Believe I Can Fly!"

I used to think that I could not go on
And life was nothing but an awful song
But now I know the meaning of true love
I'm leaning on the everlasting arms

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it

I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly

See I was on the verge of breaking down
Sometimes silence can seem so loud
There are miracles in life I must achieve
But first I know it starts inside of me, oh

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it

Hey, cuz I believe in me, oh

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it

Hey, if I just spread my wings
I can fly
I can fly
I can fly, hey
If I just spread my wings
I can fly
Fly-eye-eye