50 words for Dean!
1. Shadow – He used to giggle when his Dad made shadow puppets on the walls of their apartment in Tulsa because he couldn't sleep for the people yelling next door.
2. Shotgun – He was 14 when he first pumped the round into the shotgun single handed, his other arm previously pulled out of the shoulder socket by a zombie who was more interested in eating Dean than paying attention to what Dad was doing behind him.
3. Cloud – "You're such a pessimist, Sammy, never a silver lining in any of your clouds."
4. Storm – Here he was driving through a fucking tornado chasing after that fucking werewolf like he was one of those fucking morons on one of those fucking Discovery Channel shows while fucking debris took the fucking paint of his fucking fuck car!
5. Brother – Before Sammy even got the last word out, Dean had jumped over the couch and managed to dislocate his little brothers jaw and was working on punching it back into place when their father finally intervened and threw him out the front door.
6. Sunlight – Damn he hated Nevada, coming out of Las Vegas and a 3 day bender he was sure there was some kind of sunlight demon trying to pull his brain out through his eyes.
7. Children – It was really kind of weird because sure, he liked kids, but that didn't explain why they seemed to gravitate to him like magnets, as if he was one of the wounded flock.
8. Naive – He was sitting in the emergency room waiting for the Doctor to finish stitching up the cut on Sammy's shoulder when he snorted loudly after overhearing a mother telling one of her brood that there was no need to be scared because monsters weren't real.
9. Maturity – Dean whistled as he walked out to his car, there was something to be said for older women.
10. Beer – His Dad gave him his first fake ID when he was fifteen and the first thing he did was buy beer, which made his Dad laugh at the complete normality of the situation.
11. Money – He knew a thousand ways to come into real money, he wasn't stupid, you couldn't pay for specialised bullets with a credit card you'd scammed when the guy you were buying from was the one who taught you how to scam in the first place.
12. Expectations – Really, it was easier not to have any expectations, people always let you down in the end, like Sam and the way he just upped and fucking left them.
13. Pride – It was one of the most satisfying feelings in the whole world when his dad would lay a weary hand on his shoulder and say "Good job, Deano."
14. Envy – He hated that he was too big and had to be strong when all he wanted to do was curl up on his dad's lap just like Sam still got to do.
15. Lust – He just couldn't help it when Sammy walked in with the hot red head from his class, all his blood rushed from his brain into his cock and the only thing he could manage was a sly grin as she flicked her hair and checked him out.
16. Despair – His heart tried to punch its way out of his chest and his stomach tried to force its way up his oesophagus but he hit replay on his phone anyway, "Dean, its Cassie… I just cant, I…" He hit replay again.
17. Chocolate – Dean diligently broke the chocolate bar in half as evenly as he could, handing the smaller half to Sammy because he just knew that more of it would end up on his hands and face than in his mouth anyways.
18. Weird – "Oh god, what's that weird smell?"
19. Smile – He's looking at photos of when they were kids, Sam is smiling in everyone and he's the kid with the scowl so they don't offer any clues as to why Sammy ran away other than it wasn't because he was never happy.
20. Tear – He wouldn't cry, he would cry, he wouldn't cry until Sam poured Holy Water on the bite and it boiled on his skin, then he'd let himself cry.
21. Mother – He can remember the way her blonde hair used to glow like a halo in the sun when she pushed him on the swing.
22. Father – His father thought a shotgun, rock salt and silver bullets were all the protection you needed in life so Dean had had to figure out the condom thing on his own with a little help from Debbie Myers in 9th grade.
23. Grope – Oh man, Debbie Myers, she was whom he was groping in the back yard that one time when dad came home early.
24. Television – Sam and his fucking insomnia was going to drive him fucking insane, if his fucking brother decided to watch fucking infomercials all fucking night again, then he would have to fucking kill him!
25. Motel – Oh god, what was it about motel rooms and the funky smells!
26. Alarm – He took aim with the revolver and shot the shit out of the towns power transistor, surely that would solve the alarm problem at the police station was where the Impala was currently impounded.
27. Failure – Fuck no! Fuck! Who the fuck has a fucking generator at a fucking unmanned fucking police station! Fuckers!
28. Celebrate – Dean danced a little jig when he finally got the generator drained of gas and got his car back after the one cop in town took off out to the power transistor.
29. Pretty – "Oh Miiiiindyyyy, you're sooooo prreeeeeettttyy!" Dean laughed as Sam chased him around the house after finally admitting that he had a girlfriend.
30. Flowers – It was fucking torture, but every time they came through Lawrence they had to take flowers to the cemetery, no excuses.
31. Struggle – The struggle for the remote was brief and ended with him and Sam sitting on Dad, The Simpson's winning out over the news for one night at least.
32. Victory – He was pretty sure he had a dislocated shoulder, two broken fingers, a couple of cracked ribs, a possible concussion and the troll had run off, but the kid it had taken was safely asleep on the back seat so he counted it as a win.
33. Pain – This was not the sort of pain he was used to, his little brother, the one he always looked out for, had taken off for Stanford just two days again and Dean hadn't noticed till their Dad walked in that he had automatically set the table for the three of them.
34. Bone – Three layers of stitches from a cut to the bone, all cause that bastard had a second knife he hadn't seen, man Dad was going to be pissed.
35. Roll – One of the first emergency drills both he and Sammy had learned was 'stop, drop and roll', understandable really.
36. Fast – She would pur while idling, scream when accelerating and settle into a loud growl when he was driving as fast as he could out of the last town he'd seen.
37. Gripe – "Bitch, bitch, bitch, Dad, just spit it out already!"
38. Fever – Sammy's 9, curled in a huddling ball of 102 fever and sweat with no blankets complaining of being cold while your Dad sits back relaxed having been through it with you 4 years ago and all you can do is pace and scowl at the both of them.
39. Collapse – He's craving pizza and burgers and is so damn sick of steak but since he collapsed from anaemia at school of all fucking things, his father has banned all junk food and cooks steak dinners every freaking night.
40. Soft – He's learned from infinite number of nights in motels that the only soft thing he really likes beneath him is a woman, not a mattress.
41. Match – He'd given up on matches in Tennessee when no mater how many freaking times he tried, he hadn't been able to get one lit and the salt line hadn't been able to hold the ghoul off, now he was all about his Zippo.
42. Pity – He'd learned in high school that girls will do the most amazing things for you if you tell them a sob story without making it sound self-pitying, like get naked and try to make you feel better.
43. Girl – The girl was 3 when she died so he was a little sorry about that, he wasn't sorry about burning her bones though, her fingers had curled around his legs like ice when she as begging to be picked up.
44. Heresy – "Foo Fighters are the AC/DC of today is freaking heresy man, it's a desecration of all things holy and I should burn you at the stake for saying shit like that."
45. Cross – The cross the crying teenager was wearing was a pretty fashion statement he supposed, but it wouldn't do shit against a demon if you didn't believe in it.
46. Starve – "Shit, Dad, I'd rather starve than eat that crap and what is it anyway, it stinks like a zombie."
47. Amusement – Their Dad was laughing in the background at the scowl on his face, but so what if Sammy was actually taller, he could still beat the crap out of him.
48. Argue – "You do what I say, when I say and you don't argue back, is that understood son?"
49. Apology – He knew by the way that Sam was slamming down the dinner plates on the table that there would be no apology, this would be a momentous sulk, likely to last days because of the 3 of them, it was Sam who hated to hear the truth the most.
50. Final – Something that he would never ever tell Sam was that as good as Sam's final SAT score had been, Dean's had been higher.