Confessions of a Marauder
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On his seventeenth birthday, James Potter receives a diary from his best friend, for the sole reason that it was on sale. Soon, he finds himself pouring his thoughts and dreams into it, and beginning to realize his true feelings for Lily Evans. A funny diary, read!
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IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE ON BOTTOM!
I reckon that went all right.
If, you know, all right means so superbly mind-blowing that my socks/shoes/other foot accessories were knocked off.
Actually, I just looked down and noticed my foot accessories currently are a pair of striped red and gold socks with my big toe sticking out and the other sock is a sickly color of yellow. Which were white when I bought them. Ages ago.
I must find those socks Remus gave me for Christmas last year. They're purple with snitches flying around, and they sing when it's time to wash them. A ruddy good invention if you ask me. I'm so clueless about matters such as laundry that's its not even funny. If I didn't have Pierre (the Potter family's French house-elf) and Remus, I would be walking around in smelly clothes.
So, this was me. Before the date.
3:30-3:56: Ran around my dormitory like a chicken with its head cut off.
3:56-4:07: Wrote a reply to Lily's owl, assuring her everything was perfectly under control, despite the yells and wall-kicking noises coming from my room. And the fact that Sirius ducked out of the room, screaming, sporting purple warts and green hair.
4:07-4:32: Attempted to flatten sorry excuse for hair. Tried everything from peanut butter to Muggle hairspray. Was unsuccessful. Was as stupid as to take advice from Peter. (Mental note: never do that again.)
4:32-4:40: Worried some more about where to take Lily.
4:41: Came up with brilliant plan.
4:42-5:00: Did research/preparation for brilliant plan.
And then, I went downstairs to pick Lily up.
She was dressed in a cozy white cardigan and Muggle jeans. And looked downright gorgeous. Which really didn't do anything for my nerves.
"This is for you." I flourished a bouquet of lilies, and she laughed, her eyes twinkling.
"How original. I love them, James."
Smugly, I replied, "I know. I asked your friend Tracey." I took her hand and led her out of the Common Room, smiling mysteriously at her.
"Are you alright? You look a bit wankered." Lily's worried voice asked.
OK. Maybe the mysterious smile part wasn't that good. Even though I practiced in front of the mirror for ten minutes.
Anyways, so we walked for a while in silence, and the only time we spoke was when I told her to make a right turn or something. Or to duck behind a tapestry since I heard Filch's vile cat, Mrs. Norris, approaching. But it wasn't a bad silence.
You see, there are two types of silences:
1. Awkward Silence: This is exactly what the name suggests. Awkward. Example: when a nerd/loser/social reject asks out a popular person, where the latter is trying to decide the best way to break the news that they would rather die a miserable, lonely death than go out with the likes of them. This can be accentuated by cricket noises. Another example: When my mum tells 'the most hilarious joke ever' and the guests don't know if they're supposed to laugh or not.
2. Comfortable Silence: Once again, the name says it all. This is the silence between two friends or more-than-just-friends. Example: me and Lily walking down the empty hallways of Hogwarts.
All of a sudden, Lily laughed, and I turned to look at her. Not that it helped, because the only light coming in the corridor was that of a lone flickering torch.
"What?"
"I was just pondering the utter incredulity of our situation."
Huh?
"It sounds like English but I have no idea what you're saying." I told her frankly, frowning into the darkness.
Lily rumpled my hair affectionately, "James, you're so ado- James! What is in your hair?" Her tone was horrified, and completely confused.
"Erm…peanut butter, hairspray, lotion, and Zorton's Smoothening Hair Gel."
She slowly asked, "I can understand the last three but peanut butter?"
I indignantly replied, "Peter told me that peanut butter is great for hair."
Lily sighed irritably, "That nutter. James, love, peanut butter is for when you get gum in your hair. Or something equally sticky. Like that time my cousin, Bill, threw a wad of gum into my hair, and I had to cut off five inches of it."
Stupid Peter. I knew peanut butter was a wonky idea. (Mental note: hunt down this 'Bill' character and kill him.)
"Oh…wait, stop!" I halted, and stared at the portrait of the fruits. Reaching out, I began to tickle the pear, while striving to remain indifferent, as though I wasn't leading Lily into the best-kept secret of Hogwarts.
"James!" Lily breathed, watching as the entrance to the kitchens appeared. She looked at me and whispered, "How'd you know I was looking for a way to approach the house-elves about their enslavement?"
"Erm…lucky guess." I offered feebly, "Besides, um, you can do your whole Elf Right thing later. For now, we're on our date."
She smiled at me, "Alright then, Mr. Potter. Why're we in the kitchens?"
I gestured into the doorway, "Welcome to the Romantic Date of the Century with the Handsomest Bloke Alive AKA James Potter."
Lily raised her brows and stepped into the kitchens, eyes scanning the room. A frown settled on her lips, and her eyes steadily narrowed at me.
"Erm…this is the part where you swoon?" I questioned weakly. The romance books Peter's always reading suggested that girls love this kind of romance baloney. And then there was a delightful swooning scene, followed by a snogging session.
Just so you know, I don't go around reading those books. I may have just…flicked through a couple. Couple being ten or twelve.
I honestly couldn't see what was wrong. The kitchen had been decorated in deep red and gold colors, just as I had instructed the house-elves. And there was a beautifully set table in the middle, complete with flickering scented candles and glistening crystal ware.
Really. The house-elves had done a superb job. The kitchens looked straight out of a fancy-shmancy restaurant.
"Did you decorate this by yourself?"
"Erm…I drew up the plans. But, you know, the elves might have helped a tad."
Lily reddened, and snapped, "You prick! I can't believe you! After you know much I detest slavery, you go on ahead and use it anyway!"
"I did not know! You never told me! And newsflash! The house-elves like working for us!"
Lily witheringly retorted, "Even though all those protest posters with my name in three-inch letters are hanging all throughout the castle?" She had chosen to ignore my last statement.
Now that she mentioned it…I recall snickering with Sirius a few weeks ago over one of them. And him charming them to read, "House-Elves Declare Work as Pleasure".
"Erm…"
Lily informed me, "If you can't even put in some elbow grease for our date, then maybe this relationship is a huge mistake."
WHAT?
Oh no, she didn't!
She did.
"Do you know how much I worked on this?" I exploded at her. "I was bloody stressed out of mind the last twenty-four hours! I was literally kicking myself when I couldn't think if anything! Then I worked on my hair, which I have never done in my life, for twenty-five minutes! Then I put in eighteen minutes of research! And you say I haven't worked at all? Maybe this relationship is a mistake because you can't appreciate me."
Lily gawked at me.
I scowled at her.
Then we noticed the frightened, pale house-elves hovering near the entrance, and their low, anxious squeaky voices.
And look back at each other.
A smile twitched on Lily's lips, "You put in twenty-five minutes working on your hair?"
I nodded.
She burst out laughing, "James! That's more time then I took getting ready! And did you seriously research for our date?"
I nodded again.
"James, love, I would've gladly gone out with you even if you hadn't showered for the past year and all we did was scrub trophies for Filch. But my one peeve is enslavement of a species, and you just had to push that certain button!"
I frowned, "Really?"
"Well…maybe the whole showering thing is an exaggeration, but that's the certain gist of it."
Huh. All this time I could've just made an appointment with Filch. Merlin, I worked myself up for nothing.
Girls.
Can't live with them, can't live without 'me.
"So, what should we do?"
Lily looked around the room again and smiled, "It would be a dreadful waste to let this all go to nothing. I reckon I can let up for tonight. Just tonight. But I plan on holding another protest rally tomorrow."
"Right this way, then."
And after that, our date was pure magic.
Well, except for the part where Lily threw a cherry and cream tart at my head on account of me casually suggesting that we hold out next date here as well.
And the part where she drenched me with pumpkin juice after I chuckled at her when she screeched at the sight of the spider on the wall.
But other than that, it was pure magic.
Author's Notes
Hey. The original plan was to end this here, but I can't help but feel it's incomplete. That I should do some more on the Marauder's friendship and Lily and James' (new) relationship.
If you guys feel the same way, please drop an email. Because I don't want to drag this on if no one would want to read it.
On lighter note, the Round Robin IS UP TODAY! It's called A Fork in the Eye by the Round Robin Ducklings. PLEASE check it out!
Kisses,
Celina