Ghostzero: (dressed like a pimp)Where's my money woman!
Tanya: I ain't got it daddy!
Ghostzero:What!(pulls out machete) Does Ghostzero have ot slice a bitch?
Tanya: Don't! I'll call the cops!
Ghostzero: Call em woman! I own you!
Tanya: No you don't! Midway does! And they own all other Mortal Kombat charecters!
Ghostzero:(remembers that)Damn! Well then I'll just kill you!(chases her) Get the fuck back here!
Tanya:Ahh!
Ghostzero: Start the damn chapter!
Darrius stood in his local Circuit City, which was in a whole another realm. He made a memo to himself to build one in Seido when he takes over. He had come here to get a PSP. He really wanted to see it was worth all the hype. Just then on the big display T.V., a campaign commercial came on.
Shao Kahn: Greetings mortals, I am Shao Kahn! Are you displeased with the way America is being lead? Well then get out and vote...FOR ME! That's right! I am running for President of your puny nation along with my Vice President Shang Tsung. MY Secreatery of Defense Quan Chi! My Secreatary of State Shinnok! And my Director of Homeland Security Onaga! And these are my campaign managers Baraka and Reptile!
Baraka and Reptile: Vote Kahn or DIE!
This ad was paid for by Shao Kahn, ruler of Outworld.
Darrius shoke his head. He hated to imagine that regime. As he was walking out with his game he was passed by a frantic Rain, who was wearing a purple t-shirt and blue jeans, but stiil had on the mask.
Rain: I need a video camera! Now!
Store employee:Why?
Rain: Me and my girlfreind are about to do some...taping. Just gimme the damn camera!
Tanya: You better hurry up before I change my mind.
Rain:(pulls out Shao Kahn's hammer and knocks the guy into oblivion.) I need a fucking camera! Somebody please!
Store Manager: Here you go sir. That'll be 199.99
Rain gave the man a bag full of Edenian coins, took the camera and ran off.
Manager: How the hell do you spend this?
Back at the Edenian Castle
Rain and Tanya are laying in bed, sweaty, naked and out of breath. The new camera was broken already.
Rain: Didn't I say that would be fun?
Tanya: Yea...
Rain: Maybe next time we can...
Just then they notice Scorpian standing in their bedroom.
Rain & Tanya:WHAT THE HELL!
Scorpian:(hands a letter to Rain) Urgent message for Rain.
Scorpian then left as fast as he had appeared.
Tanya: What does it say?
At the Shaolin Temple
Kai was just about to finish his shrine to Li Mei when...
Scorpian: Urgent message for Kai(gives him letter)
at Goro's Castle
Goro is chasing a naked Sheeva.
Goro: Come to Goro!
Scorpian: Urgent message for Sheeva.
Sheeva covered herself with three of her arms and took the letter with the fourth
Goro: How dare you look at my 3rd wife's nude body!
He charges Scorpian only to be knocked out with one hit.
at the Outworld Gym
Reiko is having a benchpressing contest with some mullet guy when...
Scorpian: Letter for Reiko
Reiko: The hell...
at a probation meeting
Stryker is pretending ot listen to his Probation Officer when...
Scorpian: Stryker! I got a letter for you.
Stryker: Sweet!
at a car shop
Sektor: I need an oil change.
Scorpian: I have this for you machine.
At a campaign meeting for Kahn
Scorpian: Take this Shinnok.
Shinnok: this better be worth my time
at Jarek's movie set
Scorpian: Stop it dammit! I have this message for you.
Jarek:(wiping nasty fluids from his face) Thanks.
Why did these guys get letters? Find out in the final chapter of Life After Mortal Kombat!