I have no idea how long I sat there, or what went on around me during that time. The tears eventually stopped and I shakily pulled myself to my feet. I never made it to the library. Instead I turned around and headed right back to the common room.

Catherine was still there waiting for me, and she knew immediately that something was wrong. Knowing that I couldn't put it off, I told her everything that had just happened to the best of my ability. My voice seemed surprisingly calm and unemotional.

One thing that I didn't tell Catherine was that I felt changed. I couldn't really describe it, but I knew I was different than I had been only hours ago. My heart felt heavy and hard, as if incapable of extreme emotions. I still thought of Tom Riddle, but it was no longer with an innocent longing or a wistful desire that he was different. It was with a sharp reality, a terrible feeling of knowing the truth.

I slept for many hours that night, and for the first time in a long while I did not dream about Tom. In fact, I couldn't remember what I had dreamt about at all. It was only a comforting emptiness that I experienced in my sleep that night.

Of course, life goes on. Mine did. It proceeded normally enough too, not nearly as tragically or dramatically as I imagined it might. Things were different, but not radically different. I just felt different. I knew I would probably never speak to Tom again. I had nothing to say to him, and I despised him more now than ever. When he haunted me now it was not with longing, but with pain.

Still, I allowed him to control parts of my life. I stopped attending the Slug Club, a special group of intelligent students led my Professor Slughorn, because I knew Tom would be there. It wasn't a terrible loss, because I wasn't really crazy about the Slug Club to begin with.

In Potions class I threw myself completely into my work and didn't allow any extra time for thinking about Tom, who was sitting just across the room. The few times I did weaken and quickly glance over he was not watching me, but scribbling furiously in some sort of book.

Around the end of November Headmaster Dippet announced that Hogwarts would be having a Yule Ball to celebrate Christmas. Catherine got very excited and began whispering to me about all the date possibilities she might have. I didn't really care, I had no real desire to go.

"Come on, Phoebe, you have to go!" Catherine told me. "Look, I know you're still upset about the whole thing that happened with Tom, but this is the perfect time to move on."

"I don't need to move on from anything, I'm fine," I said. "Besides, I'm not gonna have a date and you will, so that won't be any fun for me."

"How do you know you won't have a date?" insisted Catherine. "Someone could ask you."

"No one will."

"Well, then maybe no one will ask me and we can just go alone together."

I smiled slightly. "You know that won't happen. Of course someone is going to ask you."

I was right, at least about that. Catherine was asked by two people, a guy named Peter from Hufflepuff and one named Nathan from Gryffindor. Catherine chose to go with Nate, because she felt he was much more exciting and good looking than Peter.

However, I turned out to be wrong in thinking that no one would ask me. It was a few weeks before the ball when Garrett approached me, looking nervous. I hadn't talked to him at all since I'd had my encounter with Tom. I had no desire to do so, even though I thought that Garrett might be able to understand how I felt a little bit better than Catherine had, since he really knew Tom.

"How are you, Phoebe?" Garrett asked me, not really looking into my eyes.

"Okay," I answered, not wishing to elaborate on my current feelings.

There was an awkward silence, until Garrett finally blurted out, "Would you like to go to the Yule Ball with me?"

I was a bit taken aback, but answered him truthfully. "I wasn't planning to go to the Yule Ball."

"Oh," he said, sounding a little depressed. "It's just… I didn't really have anyone to go with, and I didn't think you did either, so I figured we could just go together so we wouldn't have to go alone or not go at all."

"I don't know," I told him. "I just don't feel like going this year."

"Catherine's going, isn't she? You should come. You might actually have a good time."

"Maybe. I'll think about it. But I'm not promising anything."

I'm not quite sure why I told Garrett I would consider going to the Yule Ball with him. I knew I would never have any real feelings for him, just as I knew I would never live out the happy fantasy life with Tom that I had imagined for myself. Nonetheless, I had obviously been feeling a bit down and sought a way to distract myself. Perhaps going to the Yule Ball would actually cure my obsession with Tom Riddle.

Catherine was constantly encouraging me and begging me to come to the Ball. She used every excuse in the book- we'd have a good time, it might be the last school dance I'd get the chance to go to, and I actually had a date this time.

I couldn't deny that Catherine did make some good points. Besides, I didn't especially like the idea of sitting all alone in the common room that night. So I told Garrett I'd go with him, and Catherine and I started planning everything that goes along with such an event.

A nagging voice in the back of my mind wondered if Tom would be attending the dance. It didn't seem like his sort of thing, but the whole school usually attended these big functions. If he was there, should I just ignore him?

Even though the feelings that I had when Tom kissed me were still strong, they had faded just enough to make me wonder what would happen if I encountered him alone again. But that was only hypothetical. Even though Tom hadn't actually done anything, I had been hurt enough by the feelings I sensed in him to allow anything else to occur between us. I just had to be strong.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

A/N: You probably noticed that there wasn't tons of action in this chapter. That's because I needed a transition chapter to pass some time and feelings. Don't worry, I do know where this story is headed. If you liked this story, please review!

Thanks to my reviewers: 404, krillball6, super kai-chan, Aladailey, Impractical Magic, angryazngirl, and Phantom'sJediBandieGirl!

404- Don't worry, you'll find out eventually!

Aladailey- Yeah, I figured that Voldy was probably always evil, even as the young Tom Riddle.

Angryazngirl- Thanks so much for your detailed review. When I first started writing my problem was always the pace, I always tried to do tons of action without any reflection from the characters- I think now I'm learning how to do that a bit more. And yeah, I always feel bad if I leave my readers hanging, but I usually end up updating every Friday. So hopefully I can stick to that deadline for myself.