Liz was just about to get up and head inside for more coffee when Jack and Ennis came walking up the yard from the river. She couldn't hear them, but she could tell from their faces that they were sniping at each other. They stopped as they climbed the stairs to the porch. "Mornin', swee'pea," Jack said.

She smiled. Liz loved that nickname more every time she heard him say it. "Hi, guys."

"What're you, uh...what're you doin'?" Jack pulled up a chair and sat facing her. Ennis lurked near his shoulder, shifting from foot to foot and appearing very interested in everything and anything else.

She glanced from one face to the other. "What's going on?"

"What d'you mean?"

"Something's going on." An awful thought came to her all at once. "Oh...I've stayed too long, haven't I? You want to know when I'm leaving...oh God, I should've..."

Jack cut her off, holding up a hand. "No, no! No, that ain't it. I told you, we love havin' you. That ain't it at all."

Liz relaxed, relieved. "Oh. Okay. Well...what is it, then?"

Jack let his head drop down for a moment, then met her eyes. "Here's the thing, Lizzie. We know that you've got a lot of...well, personal kinda questions you'd like to ask, but don't rightly know how. We decided we'd spare you the trouble and bring it up first."

Liz sat up straighter. "Really?"

"We agreed to this book thing, and we ain't backin' out now." Without looking, he reached back, grabbed Ennis's arm and yanked him down into a chair. "Right, Ennis?"

Ennis gave a curt nod, coughing and clearing his throat. "S'pose so," he said, crossing his arms over his chest.

"So what you wanna know?"

Liz wasn't prepared for this, but she wasn't going to waste the opportunity, which might never come again. "I appreciate this, guys," she said. "It's awkward for me, too. This isn't like an ordinary project anymore." She smiled. "You're friends now, and friends don't pry into each other's private lives, right?"

"We c'n just pretend we ain't friends for a bit, if'n it'll make it easier."

She laughed. "I'm not that good at pretending." She took a deep breath. "Well," she said, pulling threads of different topics into her mind. "I guess what I'm most interested in is how it's different than a straight relationship. I mean, you hear all the time about married couples where the husband always wants it and the wife never wants to, and supposedly women just tolerate it while men are randy bastards."

Jack sniffed. "I guess that's true for some folks."

"It must be different when both of you are men, right?"

"A bit," Jack said, smirking.

"I read this article that said the average couple married for more than five years has sex three times a week."

"That so? Huh."

Liz looked at their inscrutable faces. They weren't going to make this easy. "So...how does that compare to your experience?"

"Umm...not too well."

"No?"

"For us it's more like...I dunno. What, four, five times a day?" Liz's mouth dropped open in spite of herself. "Zat sound 'bout right, Ennis?" Jack said, glancing back.

Ennis harrumphed and gave a little shrug. "I s'pose. Give 'r take a few."

The ability to speak had left her. Liz looked at their expectant faces, waiting for a response...then she caught it. That little twinkle in Jack's eyes and that curl of his lip, Ennis's gaze fixed decidedly elsewhere but a quirk of amusement lurking at the corner of his mouth. She exhaled and shook her head. "If you guys are just gonna fuck with me, we can forget it," she said, smiling in spite of herself.

Jack laughed. "I cain't believe you fell for that. We ain't eighteen no more, you know."

Ennis fetched a sigh, then raised his hands in supplication. "Y'know what? I cain't do this. I'm just gonna 'scuse myself and go castrate a calf or somethin'. Y'all can talk about whatever you please and I'll never know nothin', which is jus' fine by me." He stood up.

Jack looked up at him. "I thought you wanted t'listen 'n make sure it wasn't too personal or anythin'."

"I trust your judgment, rodeo. Don't let it go t'your head, now." He walked past Jack's chair toward the stairs, but halfway there he stopped, squared his shoulders and turned back. After a moment's hesitation, he walked decisively to Jack's side, leaned over and kissed him firmly on the mouth, one hand going to the back of his head. Liz could only stare. Ennis straightened up again and fixed her with a significant look, eyebrows raised: there, happy now? He gave a little nod, then turned and went down to the yard, heading for the stables.

Jack watched him go, a bemused expression on his face. "Well, now," he said. "There's somethin' y'don't see ever day." He turned back to Liz. "Where were we, then?"

"I was asking about how it was different."

"See, right away, you're comin' at it all wrong."

"I am?"

"You got this whole idea that it's some kinda strange new thing like landin' on the moon or the discovery of America. Truth is, Lizzie...the act itself? It ain't no different, not really. I mean, the bits'r different, sure, but ain't that just window-dressin'? It is what it is, you know?"

Liz pondered this for a moment. "I guess sex is just about connecting with somebody, regardless of whether it's a woman or a man."

"Well...sometimes it's about how much whiskey you've had," Jack said, with a rueful smile. "I mean, folks do it for lots 'o reasons. To have kids, and 'cause it's what you do when you're hitched, and 'cause you're horny, and 'cause t'other person wants to, and sometimes just 'cause it's cold 'n you're both there." He sighed. "But if you're lucky, you're havin' it 'cause you feel somethin' for somebody, and there ain't no better way t'let 'em know."

Liz thought back to her first few months with Charlie. How she couldn't get close enough to him, how she'd wanted to crawl inside him and turn them into one person, and she understood. "Is it like that for you?" she asked.

Jack smiled. "Look, honey. I ain't gonna sit here and describe chapter 'n verse 'o what me 'n Ennis do together, 'cause that's private and it ain't no one else's business. But I c'n say in a general kinda way that yeah, it's like that for me."

"Is it...well, is it better than with Lureen?"

He thought for a moment. "It's real, and I cain't say that 'bout Lureen. I mean, bein' with her felt good 'n all. You gotta know that us fellas, we ain't too picky." Liz laughed. "But it was just a thing we did, y'know? I never felt like it meant much. It was a better alternative to wringin' it out myself." He glanced up at her, flushing. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Liz said, grinning. "I am aware of the concept."

"'Course you are. Anyway...I ain't gonna lie. When I was with Lureen, half the time...okay, mos' 'o the time...I'd be thinkin' 'bout Ennis. It was a powerful relief to be able t'put away all those thoughts, 'cause I had him in the flesh...so to speak." He sat back, resting one ankle on the opposite knee. "I c'n barely remember what it felt like t'be with a woman. Times I forget that lots 'o folks think my bein' with him's unnatural and perverted, 'cause it sure feels natural t'me. What you was saying 'afore, 'bout men wantin' it more 'n women?" Liz nodded. "Well, that ain't no problem for us. No one gets no headaches in our house, take my meanin'? Ennis ain't never turned me away, nor I him. Sometimes makes me wonder what the Lord was thinkin' when he made men 'n women so different in what they like, if'n he wanted 'em to be doin' it so's they could have kids'n all." He shrugged. "I mean, think on it a minute. All the parts is familiar, 'cause they're the same ones I got. He ain't never asked me what I was thinkin' right afterwards. It ain't no big drama if'n we both fall right asleep. Never got t'worry 'bout no unexpected babies. Don't gotta mess with no rubbers or God knows what else. It's just...I dunno. It's like we're 'o the same mind about it. Lureen's mind was always a total fuckin' mystery t'me, and so was what she wanted 'n liked in bed. But with Ennis, there ain't no mystery."

Liz nodded. "I can see the advantages."

"Yeah, well, keep it t'yourself. If all them straight fellas found out about it, there'd be queer ranchers 'round every hillside."

They laughed, partly out of amusement and partly out of relief to be getting this discussion out of the way. "My lips are sealed," Liz said.

"Oh, that ain't the only thing. You know what the biggest advantage is 'o livin' with a man?" Liz shook her head, leaning forward in anticipation of an astonishing revelation. "Socks. You c'n share socks. Never run out."

Liz stared for a moment, then busted out laughing. "Socks, huh? Let me make a note of that."

"Not just socks, neither. Me 'n Ennis are 'bout the same size. I c'n wear his jeans, though his shirts get a bit tight 'round the chest. And if I'm outta clean drawers, I c'n just steal a pair 'o his."

"You wear his underwear?" Liz said, laughing.

"Sure. Why not? It's clean. Besides," he said, smirking, "I been a whole helluva lot closer to his ass than that."

She found Ennis in the shed, cleaning rifles. "Can I come in?"

"Sure. Jus' mind you don't touch nothin'."

Liz wasn't tempted. The shed was where they kept all the ranch's weapons. Shotguns, rifles, a few handguns, and boxes upon boxes of ammunition. She perched on a stool and watched for a moment as Ennis disassembled the rifle. "Can I ask you something?"

"S'long as it ain't about my bedroom activities."

She chuckled. "No, I think we've put that topic to bed. Pardon the pun."

"Then shoot." He chuckled, nodding at the rifle. "Pardon my pun."

"I know that Jack wanted something more permanent with you for years, but you resisted."

"That's so."

"What made that last time different? What made you finally agree?"

Ennis went about his work for a few moments, silent. Liz knew him well enough by now to judge that he wasn't resisting the question, but merely weighing his response. "I watched him drive away from me once," he finally said, "and it pulled at my guts so much I was sick for days. Years, maybe. That las' time, when he drove up from Childress just 'cause I'd gotten a divorce..." He sighed. "I jus' couldn't watch him drive away again. It was real close, though. Too close. He was back in the truck and puttin' it in gear 'afore I could unglue my jaw."

"What'd you say?"

He shrugged. "Don't rightly recall. Was so twisted up, I'd no idea what I was doin'. I had the girls there, and I was scared 'o someone seein' him with me...I dunno. I think I jus' asked him t'stick around until I took the girls home 'n we could talk." He was reassembling the rifle now. "Dunno where I screwed up the nerve, and that's the truth. I never could see how t'make it work, even though I fuckin' hated it ever time I watched him leave." He shrugged. "I guess when I come back 'n I saw what he was hopin'…it jus' hit me all at once."

"What did?"

Ennis met her eyes. For a moment, he said nothing. "He was willin' t'leave his family 'n his home, 'n risk them tire irons, 'n face whatever might happen, all 'cause he wanted t'be with me." He lowered his eyes and his voice. "He was willin' t'fight for us, like I never was. I looked at him that day 'n he shamed me. Felt myself a coward next t'him." He shook his head. "I couldn't send him back t'Childress after that. I didn't care where we had t'go or what we had t'do, I couldn't stand it. I saw my chance t'be happy. Maybe my las' chance. God help me, I took it." He cleared his throat and stood up, shuffling in embarrassment for having exposed his feelings to her so nakedly. He replaced the rifle on the rack. "Damn, city gal. How it is you get me talkin' so I'll never know."

Liz smiled. "Maybe you wanted to tell somebody these things. Maybe you just needed an excuse."

Ennis returned to the bench with two more rifles. "Mayhap so. Now, you sit up here with me, you're gonna learn to clean these rifles. Time y'started earnin' your keep."

"Christ, Lizzie, you smell like a firing range."

"Ennis had me cleaning rifles." Lizzie cast a weary glance down at her shirt, which was spotted with gun oil. How Ennis did it without getting the foul stuff all over himself was a mystery.

Jack laughed. "Prob'ly jus' wanted t'keep you from askin' no more questions 'bout his sex life."

She sighed. "I wasn't going to."

"He'll be relieved to know it."

They were on horseback, standing by the gates of the north corral, which was half-full of calves. Ennis and Stubbs, the ranch foreman, were riding through the larger herd, culling the calves and herding them into the corral. Liz watched Jack's eyes track Ennis as he rode back and forth, whistling sharply. "Man looks fine on horseback," she commented.

Jack glanced at her. "You ain't gonna get no quarrel from me."

"What's the story with these calves, then?"

He sighed. "Well, some of 'em we'll keep. Some of 'em will be sold to dairy farmers. Ennis'll pick out the best ones for me t'look at."

"Look at for what?"

"For breedin' stock. All these calves was sired by Joey, he's the bull we keep here for ourselves. Joey's calves c'n fetch a high price as breeders. We got ten or so orders in for suitable bulls if any come up. Might find one or two worth showin' this year, too."

"Paul told me you're good at husbandry."

"I get by."

"He said you have a 'spooky gift' for it."

Jack fidgeted and blushed, but Liz could see that the praise pleased him. "Doc's jus' flatterin' me. Gets a lot 'o business from us, he does." Jack trotted a few yards away, peering over the fence at the calves. Liz watched him, her earlier comment about men on horseback recurring. She looked back out towards the herd. Ennis stuck up from the mass of bovine flesh as a denim-colored finger, his eyes shaded by the brim of his hat.

She was looking right at him when it happened. Ennis's horse was just trotting along, calm and under control, when all at once it screamed. Liz had never heard a horse make that sound. She saw Jack's head whip around out of the corner of her eyes. The horse immediately began to buck and thrash. Ennis tried to ride it out but he couldn't hang on. With one mighty heave of the horse's powerful hindquarters, Ennis was launched from its back as if from a catapult. He flew through the air and landed half on the top rail of the corral fence, then flopped onto the ground and lay still.

Liz heard Jack yell his name and saw him spur his horse into a gallop. Stubbs was already off his horse and running to Ennis's side. Liz felt like she'd been doused in cold water, but somehow she managed the presence of mind to ride to where Ennis lay on his stomach, horribly still.

Jack was dismounting before his horse had stopped moving. He skidded to his knees next to Ennis, yanking Stubbs back before he could do anything. "Don't touch him," Jack said, his voice surprisingly even. "Mighta hurt his back or his neck, don't move him. Get down 'n call Pete." Stubbs didn't move. Jack shoved him, hard. "Go, now!"

Stubbs got to his feet, leapt back onto his horse and took off towards the house. Liz knelt on Ennis's other side, feeling helpless. Jack bent over his head. "Ennis?" he said. "C'n y'hear me, cowboy?" His voice was gentle, but Liz could see his hands shaking and beads of sweat popping out on his brow.

Ennis grunted. "Fuck," he said. Liz saw his legs move. That was a good sign. "Jack?"

"You got thrown, hoss. Don't move, now. Doc's on the way. You jus' lie still."

"Quit fussin', I'm fine." Ennis stirred and rolled onto his side. Jack reached out and steadied his shoulder.

"C'n you feel everythin'? Anythin' hurt?"

"Fuckin' everthin' hurts, y'dumb bastard." Liz saw Jack relaxing bit by bit as it became clear that Ennis had full control of all his limbs. He raised a hand to his head. "Sonofabitch."

"Take it easy, now." Jack helped Ennis roll onto his back. He groaned and let his head fall back. "Damn, you gave me 'n Lizzie quite a start." Jack smiled. "I ain't never seen you fly like that, bud. Didn't know you were so aerodynamic."

Ennis chuckled. "Musta looked ridiculous." He looked up at Jack, then raised his hand and briefly touched the back of a finger to his cheek. "Didn't mean t'startle you none, friend." He started to lower his hand again but Jack grasped it.

"Jus' glad you're ok." He squeezed Ennis's hand briefly, then released it. "But that's for Pete to say. C'n you get up?"

Ennis nodded, grunting as he struggled to sit up. Jack put one arm around his shoulders and helped him. "Ain't the firs' time I been thrown, y'know," Ennis grumbled, lurching to his feet and slinging one arm across Jack's shoulders. "Goddamn," he said. "I am gonna feel that in the mornin'."

Pete turned out to be Dr. Peter Llewellyn, the local general practitioner, who lived only a mile up the road. By the time Jack and Ennis made it back to the house, Ennis leaning on Jack and Liz tagging along behind like a puppy, the doctor was already there, summoned by Stubbs's phone call.

"Damn, Ennis," Dr. Llewellyn said. "What'd you do to that horse, anyway, insult her mother?" He led Ennis to a chair and sat him down, then started examining him.

"I'm fine, Doc," Ennis growled.

"Shut up and let the man work," Jack said, stepping back.

"You ain't my mother, rodeo."

"Well, I'm the next best thing. You be still or I'll come over there'n hold you down, how's that?"

The doctor chuckled. "I dunno, Jack. He might like that." Jack laughed as Ennis turned fuchsia.

Liz followed Jack into the kitchen. Once they were out of sight, he let out a huge breath and shook himself all over like a wet dog. "You all right?" Liz said, putting a hand on his arm.

"Yeah. Jus' stirred up my guts a bit t'see him fall like that. Y'know what I mean."

"Sure. What do you think happened? Why'd the horse throw him?"

"Beats me. I'll have to go have a look at her. If I had t'guess, I'd say maybe a snake bit her. It was so sudden."

"Will Ennis be okay?"

"Sure. He's been thrown a dozen times and so've I. He'll be sore a coupla days and then right as rain." Jack shook his head. "You just never know 'round here. We both broken arms 'n legs, but it'd be real easy to break a back or a neck. Ranchin' ain't the safest life, and that's the truth."

"I heard about the time you almost got shot."

Jack snorted. "Oh yeah, that. Not the best day 'o my life." He shook his head. "I ain't never seen Ennis so mad. Honest, it kinda gave me a bad turn. I had t'stop him from beatin' that dumb kid to a bloody pulp."

"Well, he almost killed you. Can you blame him for being angry? How would you have felt?"

Jack thought about this for a moment, then nodded. "Yeah, you're right. Just ask me how much I'd like to send that fuckin' horse to the glue factory right about now."

Dr. Llewellyn came into the kitchen. "He seems fine, Jack. Bit rattled. He'll be sore as hell tomorrow, though."

"He landed kinda funny on his leg. It ain't sprained or nothin'?"

"I don't think so. He walked on it, and it doesn't feel swollen. You know where to find me if it gets worse." He looked at Liz. "This must be your reporter friend."

Jack laughed. "Talk sure do run 'round," he said. "Pete, this is Liz Forbes. Lizzie, this our doc, Pete Llewellyn."

"Nice to meet you, Liz," the doctor said.

"You too, Doctor."

"Please, call me Pete," he said, and smiled. It transformed his whole face. Llewellyn was shaped like a beanpole, skinny and narrow-faced with fluffy, sandy hair and gray eyes. He reminded Liz of Ichabod Crane. He wore round John Lennon glasses and the same denim-and-chambray country ensemble that seemed de rigeur in the area.

"Okay, I will."

Jack excused himself to go talk to Ennis, but Pete stayed. Liz waited for the inevitable "how do you like Farmingdale?" question, and great was her surprise when it wasn't the question that came.

Pete crossed his arms. "Why are you doing this?" he asked, quietly.

Liz blinked. "Why am I doing what?"

"You ought to leave them be."

"But…what…I don't…" Liz was rendered spluttering and incoherent by this unexpected interrogation.

"You know what it took for them to move out here and set up this place? You know what they face every day, just to be able to walk down the street together?"

"Of course I do! That's why I'm…"

"They think you're their friend, but you're not, are you? You're thinking about books exposing the secret homosexual lives of rural Americans, the kind of books that win Pulitzers. You're not thinking about what's best for them. You're thinking about yourself."

"Now, wait just a minute," Liz said, anger replacing her confusion. "I care about them. I want to tell their story, because I think it's one the country needs to hear. People need to know that they are just like anyone else, and they live ordinary lives. I will do everything in my power to safeguard their privacy, and their anonymity."

"It doesn't matter if you call them Zeke and Biff and say that they live in Idaho growing potatoes. The people here will know who you're writing about, and a lot of those people only tolerate them because what they are isn't being shoved in their faces. Anything you write might upset that balance. It's bad enough what happened at the fair. Do you want to risk poisoning this place for them?"

"For them or for you?" Liz asked, suddenly finding her journalistic prickliness turned back on. "Do you have an agenda here, Dr. Llewellyn? Do you have an Ennis or a Jack of your own?"

He shook his head. "Of course, that's the only reason I might be interested in their welfare, because it affects me. I'm single, Ms. Forbes, and I don't bat for their team. But I've known Jack and Ennis since they moved here. They are good, decent men who've done a great deal for this community. Their private lives are none of my business, or yours, and they don't deserve to be vilified for it, whether it be by Stan Forrester or by you."

Liz's mouth was hanging open. "I'd never vilify them! I love them, and this place! I only want…"

"What? What do you want?" He took a step closer. Liz stood her ground with effort. "Your motives could stand some scrutiny." He lowered his voice. "I saw the way you looked at him." Liz felt gutshot. "What is it that you're hoping for?"

She was shaking now. "I resent the implication."

"It's true, isn't it?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "My feelings for Jack are friendly, nothing more."

"I'm relieved to hear it. Only I never said that I was referring to Jack." He sighed. "Listen, I understand the allure of this place. Life seems so simple here, doesn't it? It is, at first. But the truth is that we have problems and complications just like anybody. I'm sorry if I sound hostile."

Liz dashed away the tears that surprised her eyes. "You're being a friend to them," she whispered. "I appreciate that."

"I'm glad you understand. I want you to understand my concerns."

She nodded. "I do. I've been thinking about it a lot."

"I'm relieved to hear it." He hesitated. "And…about the other matter…"

Liz shook her head, sharply. "He'll never know." How could he, when she barely knew herself? The good doctor had just dragged into the light, kicking and screaming, a little ashamed section of her brain that she'd been busily beating back into the darkness for days. It didn't matter. She hated herself for it as much as she couldn't help it. She'd have rather packed up and fled back to New York this very night than let it past the boundaries of herself and into this home where she had been welcomed and made to feel one of the family.

Pete nodded. "Good." He smiled again. Liz was glad to see it. "Look, I just came down on you pretty hard, and I…"

"Don't apologize."

He shrugged. "Okay, I won't. I'll let myself out, then. Tell Ennis to call me tomorrow if he needs something stronger than aspirin."

Liz managed a smile in return. "I will."

She watched the doctor leave by the back door. She sagged against the edge of the counter, replaying the conversation in her head, hoping she'd just imagined that part about Jack…but she hadn't.

She went to the entrance into the living room and peeked around the doorjamb, keeping to the shadows. Ennis was sitting on the floor, his legs stuck out in front of him, rubbing and flexing his right forearm while Jack knelt behind him, massaging his shoulders. Ennis's chin was on his chest, his head lolling with the motion of Jack's hands. "Does that hurt?" she heard Jack murmur.

"It s'posed to?"

"A little."

"Yeah, it fuckin' hurts." He sounded amused.

Jack chuckled. "Ain't my fault you can't stay on the back of a horse."

"And what was your best time on them bulls, huh? Four seconds? Maybe five?"

Jack sat down with his legs on either side of Ennis's hips and wrapped his arms around him from behind. Ennis leaned into him with a sigh, his head falling back to Jack's shoulder. "You ain't gonna be no good to me the next few days," Jack murmured, stroking his hands up and down Ennis's chest. "Too sore to do much more'n watch fuckin' Donahue."

Their embrace was becoming more intimate than Liz felt comfortable witnessing without their knowledge. She took a step back. "Ennis?" she called from the kitchen.

"Yeah?"

She gave them a few moments to separate, then walked into the living room. To her surprise, they hadn't moved. She had the feeling they were testing her…or possibly themselves. They were both looking at her evenly, as if daring her to react. She didn't, just sat down in a chair facing them. "Dr. Llewellyn said to call him if you need stronger painkillers in the morning."

"I think I still got some codeine from when I sprained my foot." Ennis craned his neck to look up at Jack. "Is them pills still in the cabinet?"

"No, you gave 'em to Marianne when she was havin' them headaches, remember?"

"Shit, you're right. Well, I'll be fine. Nothin's broken, anyway."

Jack grinned, then bent and kissed the juncture of his neck and shoulder. "Nothin' but a new air-speed record for ranchers."