Serizawa didn't consider himself to be a very talkative person.
He always said the wrong thing, or too much, or too little. He was still so out of practice…better than he had been when he'd left his room but still not anywhere near the level of normal people. It all came so effortlessly to them. They said 'hello' to each other and 'goodbye' and all the words that came in between. Serizawa could barely even manage a 'hello' most of the time. It always came out too loud or too soft or too early or too late. It was just easier to let Miss Suzuki talk to people. She was the interesting one anyway.
No wonder everyone wanted to be her friend.
"…not cannon. But it should be. I mean if Elsa has ice powers then Anna should have plant powers." Said Miss Suzuki. Serizawa had heard this argument before. He was happy to hear it again. He loved it when Miss Suzuki talked about things that she cared about, and there were very few things that she cared about more than Frozen. Her theory made sense, too, and even if it hadn't he would have been happy to hear her talk…how happy she was.
He wouldn't have contradicted her.
"What about fire powers? Isn't that the opposite of ice?" asked Joseph as he put his cigarette out. Serizawa had thought of that before, ice and fire being opposites, but he hadn't argued with Miss Suzuki like that…not that he was going to say anything. He just stared down at his game. He knew better than to say anything.
Anything he'd said would have been the wrong thing.
"It is but Anna's nice, she would never have fire powers. Fire is too mean…destructive, I mean. Also she wears green, not red." Said Miss Suzuki
"Fire isn't always destructive. It can be a good tool for…whatever you need it for." Said Joseph in a tone that Serizawa couldn't read.
"True but Anna should have plant powers because plants grow in the summer and summer is the opposite of winter." Said Miss Suzuki. He hadn't thought of that at first, she'd had to tell him…so why did he feel kind of…not happy with Joseph for not knowing…or maybe he was just in a bad mood. There was so much fighting at home and….and that might have been it…or something. He wasn't sure. He wished that there could have been something that he could have done to make it go away.
But he didn't like to smoke.
Miss Suzuki really liked to smoke. She had been smoking like a chimney, Minegishi's words not his, and he didn't mind…he was used to it. If it made her happy then it was ok. He could live with the smoke. It wasn't like she was going to stop. She pulled out a cigarette and held it between her teeth. She tried to start her lighter…it clicked but didn't start…
He should have wanted it to stay off…that was mean of him.
"Need a light?" asked Joseph as he held up his lighter necklace. It was so cool. He was so cool. He was one of the coolest people Serizawa knew. Maybe it was the coat, or the way he spoke, or how he carried himself…maybe all of it. Serizawa wasn't anything like Joseph…not that he wanted to be. He knew to keep his goals doable. Serizawa couldn't be anything like Joseph, or anyone else for that matter, because he was just…
He was just…himself.
"Thank you." said Miss Suzuki as she grabbed the lighter with her powers. He ducked, maybe too much. His head hit the top of his Gameboy…but the Gameboy was ok. Nothing could hurt a Gameboy. Well nothing but screen burn…a lot of his older handhelds had that problem.
That was what happened when you spent fifteen years in your room playing videogames.
"What is that? A joint?" asked Joseph
"Do you want some? I should have let you have it first, sorry, I'm just used to having nobody to smoke with. Minegishi is mad at me and Shimazaki…it's really complicated with him…and Sho really shouldn't smoke. He either gets way too stoned or way too sad…and Serizawa doesn't smoke at all." Said Miss Suzuki
"I'll pass, I don't know if your Dad would want me smoking in his office. He's probably watching us right now." said Joseph
"He doesn't care, and I don't think that he's watching us, he's really busy. Hatori maybe, he likes to look through security cameras sometimes." Said Miss Suzuki
"Wait, so he can just look through any camera? Or does he need to be under it or…sorry, sorry. Just trying to wrap my head around how his powers work." Said Joseph
"It's ok, his powers are kind of complicated. He doesn't even know how they work. He needs to look through his phone to see through cameras…I think. I'm not really sure. There's probably more about him in the archives." Said Miss Suzuki
"Good look getting into those." Said Joseph
"Why good luck?" asked Miss Suzuki
"Aren't those locked down tight? The Awakening scientists are pretty protective over their work." Said Joseph
"They are? They never said anything to me." Said Miss Suzuki
"Wait, you have access to the Awakening Data?" asked Joseph
"Yes. Do you want to see it?" asked Miss Suzuki
"If it's not too much trouble. I know you have a lot to do today." Said Joseph. Serizawa didn't like the way he said that to her…and he didn't know why. It was kind of like how Shimazaki talked to her…but he'd been in love with her. She hadn't been in love with him so…so that was ok? Because then they could still be friends…that was dumb. She was always going to be his friend, she had promised, and a promise was a promise.
"Not really. I mostly just have to answer a lot of emails and figure out what we're going to do for Halloween. I'm happy that Sho's idea won…even if Universal isn't that much fun…but it's a lot of planning for me to do. I voted for Disneyland and I knew that there was a chance that I wouldn't win-" said Miss Suzuki
"I voted for Disneyland too! So you…you could have won…you had twice as much of a chance…um…" said Serizawa. He should have kept his mouth shut. He should have just let them talk…but they had been talking for so long and he'd just been sitting there staring at what used to be a game of Tetris. Back when he'd been little he hadn't had many games. Tetris had come with his Gameboy and he'd played a lot of it…a lot. Especially after Mom had gotten him a charging pack for his Gameboy. He could just leave it in the wall while he slept. That way it wouldn't feel like as much time had passed as it had…or maybe more time…
Enough time to wind up with screen burn.
"Um…but your brother had a good idea, too." Said Serizawa. His face was burning. He wondered if it would get stuck like this. Face burn…no, that was dumb. He was glad that he had kept that one to himself. Joseph was giving him a look, now, like he wanted to laugh…like he was laughing with his eyes. It wasn't as bad as when girls laughed at you, at least when another boy laughed at you then you knew why.
He was clueless. That was why.
"You're right, Sho did. I guess Disneyland can get kind of boring…and also it's kind of hard to get fast passes for everyone in Tokyo HQ…but getting everyone to Osaka is going to be hard. I don't think we have enough planes and it's a long drive…maybe we should have a recount…re-hat?" asked Miss Suzuki
"Re-hat sounds right." Said Serizawa. Just because he had never heard a word before, and had no idea how to even write it, didn't mean that it wasn't real. If Miss Suzuki said it then it was real.
"Or maybe re-pick? Or…well it doesn't really matter what it's called. We just might need to pick again. Sho's going to be so upset but…well no, I shouldn't be upsetting him. I've just got to find a way, that's all." Said Miss Suzuki. Serizawa put his Gameboy down on her desk and reached over. He patted her on the back. That seemed ok. He didn't want to accidentally hurt her. He could see his aura…nothing good ever happened when he could see it…but he was fine. He wasn't scared. He was just…just…
He wasn't really happy about being stared at…that was all.
"Yeah, a re-hat would probably be good. I mean can we even afford to send everyone to Osaka?" asked Joseph. He breathed out when he said that….right in Miss Suzuki's direction. That didn't seem right. He didn't care if Miss Suzuki breathed smoke on him, he had gotten used to the smell a while ago, but that didn't mean that other people could treat her like that…but she didn't seem to mind…and if she didn't mind then he shouldn't have minded.
But he did. He didn't know why but he did.
"But what if we end up with Sho's pick again? I can't go back to Osaka. Ever. For any reason." Said Miss Suzuki. Serizawa patted her on the back again. He had no idea if his Dad had a girlfriend or a wife or whatever else a girl could be to you and he had no idea if he would have been upset if he did, he couldn't even remember his dad, but he knew how hurt Miss Suzuki was. He was happy that the President had found love…but he was sad that she was sad…those were feelings he understood.
He liked it better when he understood his feelings.
"If you're worried about your enemies he could probably protect you, me too if you wanted to bring me with." Said Joseph. He didn't like the way Joseph was looking at her. It was like how Shimazaki looked at her, with his aura, but also…not? He looked at her kind of like she was a treasure chest and he had a high lock picking skill…and he didn't like it….but she wasn't upset.
He was probably just being weird. That happened when you spent years away from society.
"No, no, Shiori isn't my enemy…I mean I don't like her but I don't want to hurt her. I don't really have any enemies, and I don't really want one…I mean nobody wants enemies. Unless they drop loot, I mean." Said Miss Suzuki. She looked at him and smiled. She didn't smile big like most people…but he liked her smile better. Girls smiling was almost as scary as when they laughed...but not her smile. He knew that she would never have been mean to him…never have done anything to he mean to him.
She wasn't like that.
"Good-good loot. Not…not slime or rat tails…sorry, I forgot that you didn't play that game." Said Serizawa
"I know what you mean, though. I don't really like RPGs but I like watching you play." Said Miss Suzuki
"You do?" asked Serizawa
"Of course. I like it when you're happy, you're my friend. We make each other happy…but you can put your own pic in the re-hat. Even if you pick Universal. If it gets picked twice then it's meant to be." Said Miss Suzuki
"I had fun but…but I think that I'll pick Disneyland again. I don't want you to have to run into Shiori….um…I don't know her family name." said Serizawa. He couldn't just call someone by their given name like that without permission! He took a deep breath. In for four, out for four, in for…he had messed up…why would Miss Suzuki have wanted to be friends with someone who messed up so easily. She could have been friends with someone who knew what to do and what to say…someone who was just…cooler than him…
Someone who wasn;t him.
"It's Sakata…but you can call her Shiori. I do. It's not like she can hear us…but even if she could then it wouldn't matter…even if I ran into her then it wouldn't matter. If you want to go back to Mario Land then we can, even if it's not a hat pick…and I'll go to Universal with Sho, I mean I would even if it wasn't a hat pick. At Christmas when I have time off…if it's opened." Said Miss Suzuki. Serizawa wiped his eyes. She was so nice to him. She cared so much about him…and she didn't have to. She had other friends, and a lot to do. She could have just left him at home…it would have made more sense if she had left him at home…but she wouldn't.
She wasn't that kind of person.
She was herself. She was the most amazing person that he had ever met in his life. She was so brave and smart and…and she was everything that he wanted to be…well not a girl, it seemed like it would have been really hard. When you were a girl then you had to worry about your hair and your clothes and makeup. Serizawa could barely put his robe on in the mornings. He knew how to dress himself, he wasn't that helpless, but it was just…hard. Like his brain got tired just thinking about it. He just laid in bed staring at his robe knowing that he had to get up, that Miss Suzuki needed him, that he needed her more than she needed him…
She was Miss Suzuki. She didn't need anyone. She was capable…not like him.
"Wait…the Iron Lady of Osaka? The Wicked Bi….Witch of Honshu?" asked Joseph. He was looking at her, still, like she was a chest or a loot crate or…or a one up block….Serizawa knew that he wasn't the best at reading people but that was just what he saw. He was probably wrong, people didn't look at other people like that, and maybe he was just…just jealous. Jealousy had been an old friend for years. He had been jealous of everyone else in the entire world. Everyone who got to grow…to change…to live. When he had been little he used to cry about it…he used to bury his face in his pillow and ask why everyone else got to change but he didn't…but that should have been over. That was over.
He was out of his room, now. He was rejoining society. He had friends. His life was better now, better than it had ever been before. He had no reason to feel this way.
"Maybe? I don't know what other people call her…but she does look like a witch. She wears a lot of black and she's mean." Said Miss Suzuki
"Wait, did she actually pick a fight with you? You of all people? You're so swee-cut…nice. You're so nice." Said Joseph. Serizawa picked his Gameboy back up and stared down at it. The screen burn was still there. He wondered if you could get eye burn like you got screen burn. Maybe. He'd find out soon, probably. If he looked up then he'd look at Joseph and if he did that then…well he didn't like thinking mean thoughts like that.
"Thank you, I try…most of the time. I wasn't very nice to her but…but she was mean first, and I didn't even do anything to her. I just came over to look for Dad and…and I don't want another brother or sister or a new mom. I have a little brother and a little sister, I don't need any more siblings, and I had a mom. We don't need any more people in our family and…and if she loves my Dad then…I don't know. I don't like to think about her and…my Dad doesn't need a girlfriend." Muttered Miss Suzuki. She went into her cigarette case…and frowned.
"I can't believe he's actually seeing the Iron Lady…wow." Said Joseph
"I can't believe it either…um….I'll be right back. I have to go and get something. You guys can…can hang out. Excuse me." Said Miss Suzuki before she pushed her chair away from her desk and left. He caught her milk bottle, it nearly tipped over. It would have fallen onto the ground and broken and then it would have smelled like milk forever and…and that was the least he could have done…especially after he'd upset her.
If it had been him.
He hadn't been the one asking about Shiori. He knew how she felt about the President's girlfriend. Of course he knew, he'd been her friend for years, she told him everything. She always told him when something bothered him or…or when something new was happening or…or if she just felt like talking. That was what friends were for…real friends…longtime friends. Not whatever Joseph was. Not the sort of friend who…who made her feel bad and looked at her like she was a loot crate. Serizawa stared down at his Gameboy. It was still paused. He could still see the screen burn…it wasn't as bad when the game was on…but he didn't really want to match blocks right now. He had other games but…but he didn't want to play them either.
He wanted to say something.
He wanted to ask Joseph why he was friends with Miss Suzuki. He wanted to ask Joseph why he didn't have his own friends. He wanted to ask Joseph why he looked at her like she was a loot crate or a one up block or…or a treasure chest. Like she was something that he wanted to…to have. Miss Suzuki was a person, not something to have and…and he wanted to ask Joseph what he wanted to do with her once he had her. If he wanted to be her friend…she'd always had other friends…but her friends, there friends, weren't…they weren't Joseph…
Serizawa didn't say anything.
He un-paused his game. He knew better than to say anything. He would have just said something wrong or dumb or…or he would have just started a fight. He didn't like fights. There were too many fights at home and…and anyway he'd never started a fight in his life. He knew that he would have been upset if someone had implied that he was…he didn't even know what he was accusing Joseph of. Nothing. Everything. Serizawa didn't know…so he didn't say anything, he just kept on playing his game.
He had never been a very talkative person anyway.