Right here, waiting for you
"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all."
―Oscar Wilde
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Sam sat quietly in the old rocking chair, strategically placed where the sun didn't hit him in the face with full force, on the left side of the porch of his house.
He was not the Sam he knew, nor the one he wished he still was. This version of him was older, yet, not bolder as he thought he would be. He was a lucky man with a beautiful wife and a great son; however, he had never felt so alone in the world since November 19th, 2020.
Dean was dead. He had died twenty years ago, but Sam still looked for any proof of the life he had hated living when he was younger. As a twenty-two-year-old man, all he wished was marrying Jessica and getting his college degree. He dreamt about the normal life he had never been able to experience, until he ran away from his father and big brother, just to find that he never really fit there. It was not part of his element.
His kid, named Dean Robert Winchester, was not going to come home early today. He had a date, and soon was going to start attending to college, which meant he had to leave the house for a couple of years. His wife, Genevieve, or "Gen" for short, was making them dinner as he sat there; all alone with a cold beer in hand. Ever since the day he was forced to burn his big brother's body, everything changed. It didn't take long before he moved out of the Bunker with their dog. A couple of years after that, Miracle passed naturally to the other side. He was a great dog.
Dean would have been proud of how well he looked after him. Dean would be proud of the life he was living.
The only place he would ever call home aside from the Impala was the Bunker. That was the one place that had witnessed their latest happy moments as they fought against evil creatures and Archangels that thought could defeat them. They thought wrong.
Every fiber of his body wanted to drive back to the Bunker and find Dean waiting for him, yelling at him for not telling him he was heading out for a very long-lasting morning run. His mind was certain that his brother was still there, but his heart knew better. Dean was physically dead. No one but him and a few other hunters remembered him after so many years. Maybe it was not a bad thing. Only the best hunters, their family, were the ones that really knew him for who he was. He was silly, caring, very protective of the ones he loved, and above all things, Sam knew he did not expect to die the way he did.
His big brother was dead. He made sure Dean was not breathing a thousand times as the dead weight of his body fell onto his. It was useless, but he tried CPR for a minute or two after he freed him from the rebar that ended his life.
Miracle sniffed his body, covered with a white sheet, and quietly sobbed while Sam prepared the pyer, not ready to say goodbye yet. The days that followed were blurry. He did not want to remember them.
Jack was doing God's chores, and after praying for a miracle that never happened, Sam knew he was the only survivor of them all. Of all people, he should have been the one that died that night. When destiny finally gave them a second chance to live, they took his heart away. Where was his home now? He could pretend playing a full-time loving husband and father for as long as he was needed, but his will was set on the many ways he could stop breathing. Whatever the cause was, he wanted to die, because that was the only way he could see the ones he lost along the way again.
Sam heard his wife calling his name. He ignored her as he watched the sunset through his glasses. Another day went by, and his brother's ashes were still spread in a cemetery, right next to his mother's ones. His father's remains were somewhere else, but that did not affect him too much those days. Overwhelming grief had the amazing capacity of making him feel incredibly numb most of the time. It didn't hit him he was living another life until he really thought about it, and those were the moments when he sat on the porch to wait for someone who would never walk back to him. Dean would never find his new house, or meet his nephew. Dean never got the chance to say goodbye to Miracle either. He was robbed of all those things and more. He was supposed to be there.
Those were the moments when he looked at the other empty rocking chair next to his. It was strategically placed there, so the sun could not find it.
If the light didn't touch its surface, the chair would never be empty, until he remembered it was a just an illusion. If that was hell, it was the worst one he had ever experienced.
Sam Winchester was an old man with a broken heart and a bad drawn smile on his face. He had to be strong for his wife and son, though. He had to be there.
He had had a life, but he lost it. Now, he could not define if he was truly living, or just trying to force his mind to think positively, honoring his brother's dying wish.
With a small sigh, he shifted positions, as the chair started rocking back and forth, bringing a sense of comfort to his soul. It almost felt like a hug from above. He chose to believe Dean was still looking after him. His pain in the ass little brother still needed him.
He was rocking him in his arms, just like the first time he met him. A tiny baby who would end up being taller than him, causing some playful punches between them that used to leave his arm hurting for a while.
Maybe existing was just enough for now. Sam thought about it for a second, and it felt right. Existing would be good enough for him until he left that place to live a better life. A happier one.
Taking a deep breath, the retired hunter got up from the chair and looked for his wife, joining her in the kitchen as the song "Carry on my Wayward Son" played on the radio.
THE END.-
Author's Note: Hey guys! I am gonna write a few stories about the finale. Hope you're okay with that. I cannot believe it's been a year since the show ended. It breaks my heart.
If you enjoyed this story, please leave a review. It makes my day. By the way, the charcters do not belong to me. If they did, I would not share them with anyone. Lol
Love you guys. Take care.
KW.-