Mob could be pretty damn annoying sometimes.
"…then I couldn't find my other gym shoe, the blue one with the glitter, and Mukai told me that she hid it. She likes to hide my things, I don't know why, I think she thinks that it's funny. She laughed a lot when I was looking for my shoe and she kept on telling me that I was hot and then I was cold and it took me so long to realize that she didn't know what she was saying…or maybe she was just trying to mess with me, I'm not sure. She likes to mess with me a lot, me specifically. Never Sho. Maybe she likes him better because they hang out more…." Said Mob. She leaned back in her chair, turned to the side so she could speak to everyone. She went on and on, as she had been for some time now. Minegishi was mostly used to her. They liked spending time with her, the loved her, but they could admit one simple truth.
There were very few things in this world more annoying than a thirteen year old girl.
"…poptarts in his pockets! Both of them. I didn't notice until I did the laundry and it was full of crumbs. Sho just said that he forgot them in there and, ok, I know that boy's pants have bigger pockets than girls pants, I mean I don't wear pants but Minegishi says so and they always wear pants. That's why they like boy's pants better than girl's pants. Also boy's pants aren't as tight. I think that all pants are way too tight. It's weird not being able to…walk? I mean I can walk but it's not comfortable." said Mob. Minegishi loved her, they really did, so of course they could admit when she was being annoying. That was just in her nature or whatever. The only thing more annoying than a thirteen year old girl was a thirteen year old boy.
Or maybe twelve and eleven twelfths would have been better.
If Sho had been there to add his commentary then Minegishi would have had to close their book and beat themselves over the head with it until they passed out. They were used to Mob and her various Mob-isms. The long stories about her life that didn't go anywhere, though the fine aged cognac might have had something to do with that, the tangents, the way she fidgeted with things with her powers…they were used to it. At least she wasn't jumping around, climbing the walls, and making up new and exciting bits of profanity to share with everyone. They could handle her.
Most other people couldn't have.
"…wears pajama pants all the time. I don't think I could do that either…it's nothing against you, Serizawa, I just don't like pants. They're just…not comfortable for me. Like Mukai and how she used to wear overalls but now she doesn't like them. Now she wears this ballerina costume, it's hers not mine, she actually doesn't wear a lot of my old costumes. They're too big for her and she doesn't like them anyway. Now she says that she's a ballerina and also she says that ballerinas hide shoes. I don't know how she came up with that. She just comes up with things sometimes…or maybe it's a game that she and Sho made up." Said Mob
"Or-or maybe she was messing with you like-like you said." Said Serizawa quickly. Minegishi looked up. Someone was tense again. Of course he tense. Anyone would have been if they had been in his position. Minegishi may not have spent half their life in self-imposed solitary confinement but even they would have been on edge if someone had been staring at them as intently as Serizawa was being stared at.
Somehow not the strangest thing about Joseph. Not by a longshot.
"She probably was. She's starting to understand more stuff. I really needed my other shoe and she was laughing a lot…but that's ok. I like it when she laughs. I didn't like how she hid my shoe in my room. Sho locked himself in again and when he does that he doesn't let me in no matter how many times I knock." Said Mob
"Why does he do that?" asked Serizawa. Joseph laughed. He put his hand over his mouth and laughed. If he hadn't been sitting so far away then they would have kicked him. Mob needed more plant life in here. Suzuki had never been a fan of living things in his space, anything that had needs was too much for him to deal with it seemed, so this office had been nothing but dark wood, books nobody ever read, fine aged liquors he never drank, and framed drawings of Sho's. Mob hadn't changed much in here. The desk had stickers on it, now. The decorative books had been replaced with manga on some shelves, and Minegishi's books on others. The hard backed, overstuffed, chairs had been replaced with bungee chairs, beanbags, and giant cushions. The couch was the same, the only useable piece of furniture in this office, and two real chairs had been added.
She only needed the one.
Minegishi was bringing in a plant. Just one. Just one near his chair so that they could smack him over the head whenever they needed to…which they got the feeling was going to be often. There was only one reason that a man his age, besides Serizawa, would have had for hovering around Mob. They didn't like it. Ryou was…part of them wanted to say that at least he had been honest. Minegishi may not have wanted to see it but he hadn't once lied to them…
Sometimes they really hated themselves.
"What…um…what are we laughing about?" asked Serizawa
"Nothing. Mob, keep going. How'd you get your shoe back?" asked Minegishi. They felt Joseph's aura. They slammed theirs into his. They didn't have much of an aura, and it worked best when it traveled through plant life, but it seemed like the message had been read loud and clear. Joseph pulled his aura back into his physical body where it belonged.
"I didn't, this is a different pair of shoes." Said Mob, lifting her legs and pointing her toe to the ceiling. She was in a skirt and knee length socks, which of course she'd end up sticking with no matter how the Tokyo winter dragged on, and Minegishi…part of them wanted to tell her to watch the way she sat. They walked that part of themselves deep into the depths of their mind and slit it's throat, of course. Mob could wear whatever she wanted.
It wasn't on her if she was being looked at.
"Oh, ok, now I see…um…these are nice, too, Miss Suzuki…but I don't know very much about shoes. The President said that boys can't understand girl's fashion so it's best not to say anything…but I think nice things are ok." Said Serizawa. They didn't worry about him. It was the other person staring at her, the person who had no business being here. The person who should have had better things to do with his time than listen to a thirteen year old girl go on about her day.
"Those are pretty nice. What are those?" asked Joseph, curious as ever. It worked, of course, if you were trying to pick someone up. Which of course Joseph was. It was obvious. It was so obvious that according to the grapevine, Serizawa and Shibata's voices carrying down the hall, Serizawa had even noticed. Serizawa, the former shut in, Katsuya had noticed….and yet Mob hadn't.
Right?
"I don't remember, I just got them because they lit up." Said Mob. She put her foot down and immediately the floor was awash in a sea of blue light. It cast a shadow across Minegishi's book. They set up and put their bookmark in.
They hadn't been able to focus, anyway.
"Don't you have somewhere else to be?" asked Minegishi, sitting up. They made eye contact and aural contact with Joseph. The only contact left was their book to Joseph's forehead.
"Not until three." Said Mob
"No…Hatori says that he can't play anything with me right now because President Suzuki won't let him do anything but sleep and work." Said Serizawa
"They're really that busy? What even is there to do in Moscow?" said Joseph
"They're in St. Petersburg now. Dad says that they're acquiring more assets, so I don't know if he's recruiting Awakened or finding more Scars…maybe the Scars. There aren't enough for the Ninth Division." Said Mob
"Wait, he finally finished it?" asked Joseph
"Mostly. He's just having trouble filling it since there aren't that many new espers to find, he said, and-" said Mob
"That's something Joseph could get on, don't you think?" asked Minegishi
"That's a good idea, I think. I mean since there's not a lot to do around here." Said Mob
"I'd rather stay here, if you don't mind. It's nice to have company." Said Joseph, so transparent he was practically invisible. The next line out of his mouth, if Minegishi knew anything about men like him, would be some comment about how mature for her age Mob was. Then a few more well placed compliments and she'd be his.
It never changed.
They had given up on thinking, wishing, and hoping that Mob was going to turn out to be smarter than them. They had been a moron, an annoying thirteen year old moron, and so was Mob. They had gone looking for love in all the wrong places, found it with all the wrong people, and made all the wrong choices. They didn't know why they had expected any better from Mob. They couldn't fault her for not being smarter than they had been.
Bu they could protect her in any way they could.
"It…it really is, better to have company. Less lonely." Said Serizawa
"Joseph, you can stay here with us if you want. I'm sure that it was just a thought-" said Mob
"Then find some company your own age. This building houses over a thousand people. Find one that isn't Mob." Said Minegishi
"Minegishi! That's mean!" said Mob. She covered her mouth with both hands, as if to keep any other words from coming out. Her aura said more than words ever could. She was completely scandalized…Serizawa looked horrified. Joseph just immediately put his hands up in the universal gesture of surrender. It was smooth, suave, and above all else it was practiced. Everything about that man was just so, incredibly, practiced.
"It's ok, it's ok, I don't want to go where I'm not wanted." Said Joseph
"Joseph, wait-" said Mob, practically jumping to her feet.
"Sit." Said Minegishi
"But-" said Mob, still standing. Her aura reached out towards the door. Minegishi slapped it away with theirs. It was a weak slap but it served to get the message across. She kept her aura where it belonged but kept on standing, like she was going to bolt after him or something.
"I said sit down." Said Minegishi, pointing at Mob's chair. Mob lowered herself downwards about halfway. Then she stopped. She watched Minegishi. They raised a space where an eyebrow would have been. Really? Was this going to turn into a fight now?
"You should do what they say. They can be kind of scary sometimes." Whispered Serizawa loudly. Someone needed to tell him that it didn't count as whispering if the entire building could hear him.
"And mean. That was mean, Minegishi, and I don't know why you said that. Are you jealous? Because that would make sense, and if you are then-" said Mob. Minegishi was getting ready to beat their head in with their book. They didn't, of course, that would have just resulted in a headache and a book with a bent spine.
"He's trying to sleep with you." said Minegishi. Mob's mouth snapped shut and she turned bright red. Serizawa did the same, though he pulled his robe up over his head. Minegishi rolled their eyes. A couple of kids…though at least Serizawa had an excuse.
"Minegishi! Why would you say something like that!?" asked Mob
"Because it's true." Said Minegishi
"He-he doesn't like me like that!" said Mob
"He doesn't, I asked. He said that he only liked you, Miss Suzuki, not that he liked you-liked you." said Serizawa
"Of course that's what he said, what else was he supposed to say?" asked Minegishi
"If someone asks you if you like someone then you have to tell the truth, or try and run away, but you shouldn't lie to people. It's not nice." Said Mob
"That's-that's true…and I don't know why anyone would lie about liking you." said Serizawa
"Generally most people don't walk around being open about how attracted they are to thirteen year old girls." Said Minegishi
"Shimazaki-" said Serizawa
"Knows that he can get away with anything. We're not here to discuss the sheer ideocracy that is Shimazaki Ryou." Said Minegishi
"I really am sorry about-" said Mob
"No." said Minegishi
"I didn't mean to-" said Mob
"We're not talking about Ryou right now. Come off it." Said Minegishi. No. He was not a subject of conversation. They weren't up to this, Mob wasn't up to this, and there wasn't enough time in the day for this.
"Are you…are you mad at-" said Mob
"I will be mad at you if you don't drop it." Said Minegishi
"Ok…but I'm sorry if I made you mad." Said Mob.
"What's making me mad is the fact that you're incapable of listening to me." said Minegishi
"I heard you…what you said." Said Mob
"You heard me but you're not listening. Joseph is clearly trying to sleep with you-and if you're going to be this squeamish about it then you shouldn't be doing it in the first place." Said Minegishi
"I'm not! Not since…um…since…I don't want to talk about this!" said Mob
"Can we please talk about something else? Can we please talk about…about…um…it's a nice day! Isn't it? It's really warm for November and…and sunny!" said Serizawa
"It-it is. I hope that it stays this nice for Sho's birthday. Usually we have a morning party but I was thinking that we could have an afternoon party and we could go somewhere he likes, like the park, and I could give everyone the day off…I mean Dad says that I have to ask him and he's going to say 'no' if I do, since he doesn't like Sho, so I'm just going to um….beg permission and ask forgiveness." Said Mob. They had no idea where she had picked that up. In a lot of ways it was better to beg forgiveness than ask permission, Minegishi had lived for years thinking that, and…and it had started around her age. When they had gotten older, stronger, when they had really decided that their life was their own…
When they had been about Mob's age. When they had been an annoying thirteen year old.
"It's better to beg forgiveness than ask permission. Fine. Believe that if you want to and do whatever you want to but just listen to me. Actually listen to what I'm saying, don't just hear it. Listen. Pay close attention. That man wants to sleep with you. You don't have to sleep with him if you don't want to…and I hope to God that you're smart enough not to want to." Said Minegishi. They did their best to stay calm. What they wanted to do was take her and shake her and knock some sense into her…but that wouldn't work. They had no idea what would work…but at least they knew what wouldn't.
"Can we please, please, please talk about something else? I really, really, really want to talk about something else." Said Serizawa, his head still turtled in his robe. He reached out with his right hand. Mob didn't even look over. She just passed him his umbrella.
"Mob, will you just listen to me-" said Minegishi
"I am! I know what you said and…and I don't…I don't want to talk about it, ok? I don't want to talk about stuff like this right now and-and-and I don't even know if I…I don't…" said Mob
"Please, can we talk about something else? There are so many other things to talk about." Said Serizawa. Mob took his hand in hers and nodded…and that was the end of that, it seemed.
"We can. We can talk about…um…have you played anything interesting lately? Sho was showing me this game where you take care of hamsters and I like it but we have real hamsters to take care of and that's a lot less fun and…um…I just think that it's interesting that there are so many pet games that Sho loves but he also has real pets. Sort of like how Mukai has a bunch of games on her phone where you have to find things and now she's hiding things around the house, like with my shoes today or the other day she hid Sho's phone in the microwave…" said Mob. Minegishi decided not to get in the middle of that. They'd said their piece and now…well now they had to hope that Mob listened to them…and then they were going to go out and collect acorns.
Lots of acorns.
Something nice, like cherry blossoms. Something useful, maybe, like cedar. Yes, cedar was good. Joseph smoked more than even they did, it was like a cloud of smoke followed him wherever he went. The room smelled for hours after he'd left…though Mob played her part. She'd probably smoke fewer cigarettes once Joseph wasn't there to egg her on, to ply her with cigarettes and nice words, once he was deep in the ground. Once he was food for a nice, tall tree. Something they could read under.
Something a bit less annoying.