Thanks so much for all the reviews! Sorry I took so long again to update but hopefully it was worth it. If you hadn't got the reference, the title is from the show 'Queer as Folk'.
Normally I plan out a bunch of jokes, then write. But this time I'm just gonna wing it. So hopefully it turns out half decent.
P.S In this I put in a lot of mistakes Mary-Sue's often make, so don't start flaming me screaming, "it's not that, you idiot!" 'Cause I purposely did it.
PP.S I kinda added a joke at myself in there… See if you can spot it… well if you're a person who reads my reviews in Bad Influence.
PPP.S In the new Charlie and The Chocolate Factory movie, in the glass elevator there's a room called, "fragile egos." How cool is that?
5
4
3
2
1
I had been at the hospital all day reading to under-privileged, fashion-challenged orphans, and it was getting late so I decided to go home. As I leaned against my car in the parking lot, I had only one thing on my mind: a ride home. I was wishing I looked more like- aw, who we kidding! I'm gorgeous!
I would describe what I look like, but that appears to change every chapter. If you haven't guessed, I am Mary-Sue. Ponyboy took a break narrating for a bit since no one can grasp the concept of changing points of view. So now I'm here.
I decided to just walk home.
I was new to the town. I worried about not fitting in and I felt isolated and alone amongst this place. Even when I made heaps of friends and got a few boyfriends before I met Ponyboy, things still felt rough. But I guess that's just how things are when you're the new chick in town. You're seen as fresh meat amongst all the boys and a threat to all the girls. But I guess that's just how things go when you just moved in 7 years ago.
I live in Tulsa. A town that's split into two with it's social classes. One side are the rich kids who are stuck up… they're called the soc's. Abbreviation for the Society's.
On the other side is my side. We're the greasers. The super, really really, cool, and totally awesome and amazing kids, who live on the East side. We're friendly and kind and everyone loves us because we're all so great and happy, and life just can't get any better if you're a greaser. Why else would all the new girls in town move here to the poor side and date all the cute guys here? See. It's a great place to live! Life just couldn't get any better.
That is… until I met the greaser's. Yes, they're a gang. Named the greasers. Since moving in with them, I've really come to know the greasers and find out a lot about them. They're all so special to me and I can't imagine what life would be like without them now. Thinking about them… I can come up with a million things describing how cool they are and how much they love me.
First, is Darry. He's 20 and works a lot. He treats me like his little sister.
Then there is Sodapop. He's so great and funny, and handsome. That's why all the girls love him so much and follow him around. It really gets them jealous that he only loves me and would do anything for me. They all cry and scream, but he loves me and only me. Because he's so in love with me. We're so alike it's scary. Both beautiful blondes, with brown eyes and happy-go-lucky, fun personalities. We always have hangovers in the morning because of how drunk we got off life the night before together.
Steve, is Sodapop's bestfriend and loves me.
Two-Bit, is hilarious! And loves me.
Dally is a tough hood, but I'm like his kid sister. The whole gang looks at me like that, like how they look at Johnny as a kid brother. Dally could never hurt me. He'd beat up Ponyboy for sure… but never me. Because he loves me.
Now there's Johnny. He's small and quiet and doesn't talk much. He can always talk to me though about his problems and fears. He can sit there for hours listening to me talking about my hair or clothes and watches me when I sleep. He's so sweet.
Ponyboy likes to read a lot and watch sunsets. I also enjoy reading and watching sunsets. In fact I'm the one who taught him how to draw. And read. Also to pee standing up. Ponyboy and me… we're close.
Over the past few weeks, being with them, they had given me my own nickname. I was so honoured to be given a nickname by them. It was oh so sweet, and flattering. Two-Bit thought of it, which only made sense since he was the only one in the gang to have a nick name to describe himself. The name they chose was perfect. It said I was beautiful, intelligent, loved by all and kind to everyone. It really did suit me and soon everyone caught onto it and was calling me by it, it was that catchy.
They nicknamed me… Mary.
So anyway, I was walking home when I spotted a car trailing behind me. I walked slower, to catch a glimpse of them in their car, in case I ever had to describe them to police. I still couldn't see them that well but they were definitely closer.
I then lifted up my skirt to see if I could catch their reflection on my smooth thighs. They were only blurs. But I knew, glossing my legs last night was a good idea.
They were very close now and had even stopped the car. I took off my top to try and make smoke signals on the side walk for help. Sadly though, I didn't have enough time to make a fire because 12 guys pinned me down.
Now, normally 12 guys can't fit into a car. But what I hadn't noticed was there were several other cars trailing behind the one I saw. Yes, I thought it was very sneaky too.
"Sex!" The guys chanted while another one cried, "I'm 23… and this will be the first and only time I may have sex." Another guy wiped away his tears nodding.
They continued to hold me down for at least 10 minutes, just staring at me blankly. "Well…" A blonde boy said, "what now?" "I really don't know. I didn't expect to get this far." They got off me, and huddled, discussing what information they knew. But it was too late, since Darry's tracking device he had planted on me had already alerted him and he was now on his way with the gang.
"Ohmigod! Greasers!" One screamed. The socs all began running to their cars and speeding off.
Darry knelt down beside me, holding me up and hugging me tightly, "are you okay!"
"I was so scared. I thought maybe in another 15 minutes I may have gotten raped."
Daisy-Sue was there too, and she sat down beside me also, "oh, your first almost rape. You're growing up into a beautiful young prey for hungry desperate men to jump on. I couldn't be more proud."
I wiped away tears, just now noticing I had been crying. I stood up and brushed myself off, "I'll be okay. Let's just thank god it's over for this week at least."
The boys all nodded, and Ponyboy looked around at them all strangely, and then we sat down again.
"I'm going to the drive-ins," Dally said out of the blue, while lighting up a smoke. "Who will come with?"
"Me," I said immediately, "me, Johnny and Ponyboy will too."
"Do I have to?" He groaned.
"How else will our romance in this story begin Ponyboy?" I tilted my head.
"There won't be any romance between you and me! God, why can't people just realize I'm not interested in girls yet! I even said it in the book! NOT INTERESTED! And no, this does not give any proof that I'm actually gay!"
Johnny looked at him strangely and leaned over to me, whispering, "he's still in denial."
"I am not!"
"Denial," Johnny nodded once again, sadly.
"So it's decided," Dally grinned cheerfully, "we'll skip straight to the scene where we're at the drive-ins!"
3
2
1
At the drive-ins… And thankfully back in Ponyboy's point of view.
So we sat in those seat things at the drive-ins, 'cause we had no car. Sure, Mary-Sue got offered a lot of times to seat in someone else's car, but she just giggled and said, she'd rather be with us. Johnny giggled and Dally blushed, giggling as well.
As we waited for the movie to begin and the previews played, Johnny picked up a guitar from the ground and faced Mary-Sue. Smiling and playing a tune, "I think this is the perfect time to play you that new song I wrote all about you. It's called, 'Mary-Sue, you're my hero.'"
I rolled my eyes, sighing frustratingly. Since when could Johnny play the guitar? Or even sing? Or afford a guitar in the first place!
A few girls in front us turned around in their seats and swooned over his voice. They all began to cheer after Johnny was done with his song and said, "you should join our band! We can travel the world!"
Johnny thought about it for a bit then asked, "what are you called?"
"Chick Chick Chicken Tonight. But if you joined, we'd be the Johnny and the Chick Chick Chicken Tonight's. What do you say? Will you join us?"
"Johnny…" Mary-Sue, pouted sadly, and fluttered her eye lashes.
"I'm sorry girls, but there's only room in my heart for one Mary-Sue," he put his arm around Mary-Sue and she giggled once again.
They all grumbled sadly, and turned around, sighing, "it was a stupid plot line anyway, I guess."
But beside those few girls in that band, were a red head and her friend.
Dally stood up, "I'm going to go get drinks for us all, you guys want a drink?"
I nodded, and so did Mary-Sue. She then looked over at Johnny, "aren't you thirsty?"
"Yes… but I have no money."
She smiled sympathetically, and reached into her bra to get her money, "don't worry, I've got plenty of cash."
She then handed Dally her change, "with my coke, I'd also like a popcorn."
Dally nodded and walked away. Johnny began crying and I patted his shoulder to comfort him in a friend way not a gay way.
Mary-Sue also patted his shoulder, "we all know you're poor, Johnny. But it's nothing to be ashamed of, we love you for who you are. And also, so what if you're parents hit you? Or neglect you? What only matters is that we're the ones who care for you."
"And who cares if you have a small dick, plenty of girls will still want you. Namely, Ponyboy." Two-Bit said, sitting down at this moment, beside Mary-Sue.
"I'm not gay!" I protested.
Two-Bit put his arm around Mary-Sue and flirted with her.
"Great boobs."
"Thankyou!"
"I love blondes, did anyone tell you? Yep, I love 'em a whole lot! Hell, I wouldn't even look twice at a girl who ain't blonde! Dang, I'm so attracted to blondes- and only blondes, that I found myself a little attracted to Sodapop once… damn, that boy has some mighty nice blonde hair!"
The red head's friend turned around, who happened to be a brunette, "hey, I know you! You're from my school! I'm Marcia, aren't you Two-Bit…"
"Get the hell away from me!" He yelled, standing up and shrieking, "you're not blonde!" He stood up on his chair, shaking violently with fear, "…you hear stories about people meeting people who aren't blonde, and actually getting along with them. I laughed it off thinking, 'yeah, that'd never happen to me.' But it did. I'm standing here, being looked at by a girl without blonde hair. And… I'm so scared," a tear ran down his cheek. "Help!" He screamed, "somebody help! Get this girl some peroxide for gods sake!"
"Look, calm down," she said, staring at him strangely, "I was just making small talk is all."
Two-Bit, squeezed his eyes shut, holding out the cross, "away from me, you non-blonde evil beast! I could never be attracted to you! NEVER! Go straight back to hell from where you came!"
"Freak," she said, standing up and walking away. The red headed girl beside her also got up to follow, but her arm knocked Dally on his way back, causing him to spill the drinks on himself and also on her.
"Oh, I'm sorry," he said, "that was my fault."
He got a napkin to help dry her off, and she smiled, welcoming the gesture, but Johnny stood up stopping him, "leave her alone, Dal."
Dally glared at him, surely Dally would have punched anyone whoever tried to tell him what to do… and this time was no exception.
He dropped the napkin, tightened his fist and was about to hurl it straight into Johnny's face, when Mary-Sue shook her head, "no."
Dally then lowered his arm, and nodded sadly, "you're right. Fighting is wrong on all levels and I'm glad you have shown me the way, Mary-Sue. From now on I shall use words, instead of violence to solve my problems, because that is what truly makes a man."
"I'm very proud of you," Mary-Sue smiled.
"WHAT!" I yelled, standing up, "I hate this! I hate you, Mary-Sue! And I hate everything! I'm leaving!"
I stormed out of there. I was just sick of everything. I was sick of Mary-Sue and her stupid "rebellious" sister, how much everyone loves Mary-Sue and how they all think she's so perfect. I also hate it what stereotypes my friends have all become ever since she arrived! I have to get out of town or something… find me a place where no Mary-Sue's are. A place of peace and quiet and exciting story lines without romance.
As I walked away I heard Two-Bit crying softly and he say barely above a whisper, "I see non-blondes…." I rolled my eyes.
I left the drive-ins and walked home, somehow walking straight into the lot.
I saw a few girls there all huddled together and giggling. I wondered for a moment whether this was some lesbian slash when I remembered there is no lesbian slash on this site.
I hadn't noticed how long I had been staring at them till they walked over to me and began talking to me, wheeling over a table with a glowing box on it as they went.
"Ponyboy!" A blonde grinned, "we have been expecting you!"
"You have?" I asked, confused. The blonde and her 3 friends smiled, nodding.
"We have come to introduce… fan fiction to you!" The blonde girl grinned excitedly as she bounced up and down, pointing the computer. The 3 other girls clapped, and wolf whistled.
"I'm sure you're wondering what the hell that is," she smirked.
"No," I shook my head, "we were introduced to it a long time ago… where the hell is that thing plugged into!" I looked around.
"Uh…" the 3 girls said, now confused as to what to do. "Well… we'll show it to you, anyway!"
"Yes, anyway!" They giggled.
They sat me down on a chair in front of the glowing box and flicked through some stories.
"By the way, my name is Gidangowin," the blonde introduced herself, "these are my friends. But you may refer to us all as the must-be-high's."
"Why are you called the must-be-high's?" I asked, furrowing my brow.
Gidangowin…who the hell name's there kid that! Gidangowin, shrugged, "no idea. Hey, why don't you read our favourite stories!"
She quickly clicked on them and I read them through. After a few stories she turned the box off and grinned, with her friends, "so! Aren't they great!"
"No," I said, shaking my head, dumb founded, "it was quite obviously the author placing herself into all those stories and making herself the main character of it, with an unrealistic portrayal of herself as some beautiful, perfect girl who me and my friends all love and somehow she can fight off like 9 socs. How could you possibly read that! What's so appealing about reading page after page of how 'perfect' this chick was!"
The must-be-high's lips all trembled and there eyes all filled with tears. Gidangowin stepped forward though, taking in deep breaths to calm herself. She then glared at me, "how dare you say that! Those stories are all very well written and are very entertaining! And, we all have stories up there about some random girl mysteriously coming into town too!" Her friends nodded.
"You're just a jerk," she glared, "a mean old nasty pants, that's what you are! You obviously can't appreciate a good story when you come across one, because I'm not easily entertained, but these stories keep me exhilarated at every last word!… My god… is that grass! Look how green it is!"
Her face brightened up into a wide smile and she layed on the ground, tilting her head in pure wonder, "I have to watch it grow!"
Her friends squealed excitedly, laying beside her, "this is so much fun!" "Look it's growing!" Another screamed, "more more! I must have more!" The girls continued screaming how great it was, and that's when I decided to slowly back off and make a run for it down the street.
When I got home, Johnny and Mary-Sue were waiting for me on the porch.
"Are you okay?" Mary-Sue asked.
I glared at her, but had forgotten what I was mad about, so I started a new argument, "why haven't your parents called you! Don't they care about you at all!"
"No…" she said, her eyes watering with tears, "they never cared. I guess that's why they were so glad to get rid of me…"
Sodapop then walked out onto the porch and picked up a basket at the door, with blankets, clothes, and various jams inside, "oh, look Mary-Sue! Another gift basket from your parents! And there's a little card inside! It says, 'to Daisy-Sue and Mary-Sue, we both miss you very very much and we wish terribly that you would come home soon. We love you with all our hearts."
"Those cruel heartless bastards," Johnny sighed, shaking his head.
Mary-Sue nodded, sobbing, "they were always mean like that! I bet they only wrote that because the bar was closed at the time!"
Sodapop hugged her, and she cried into his chest. "Come on," he cooed, "let's go inside." He then noticed me, "hey, Ponyboy." Then him and Mary-Sue walked inside.
"You aren't mad with me are you, Ponyboy?" Johnny asked, searching my eyes with worry.
I smiled at him, "no, Johnny. You're my bestfriend, I could never get mad at you. I'm just a little irritated lately how much you've ignored me ever since Mary-Sue came along."
Johnny stepped forward and put his hand on my shoulder, "I'm so sorry…" Then he pressed his lips to mine!
I pushed him away violently, staying at him in disgusted shock.
That's when Steve came out and wrapped his arms around us, smiling, "oh, golly I knew it." He then pushed us inside, "everyone, Johnny and Ponyboy are together!"
"We are not!" I yelled.
Steve laughed, "oh, Pony, you weren't fooling anyone. "the sunsets, the drawings, that magazine of naked men under your bed."
"I told you I don't know how it got there!"
"Either way," Darry said, kneeling down beside me and then hugging me, "we don't care if you like boys. Even if this is a time and society where it is 100 totally not accepted, and even if you are gay, they still didn't come out… oh and if you did- the teasing, the taunting, the constant beatings and ridicule. You were a disgrace and seen as dirt and even your own family and friends would definitely turn their back on you without a second thought. And the possibility of being a gay boy and turning your straight best friend into a gay guy too, was impossible. But we live by 21st century rules in this house, mister, so we accept you for who you are!"
"But I'm not gay!"
"Stop living this lie of yours!" Darry insisted, "come out! Set your soul free!"
"Set my soul free..? Look, I'm not interested in girls yet! Maybe next year! Sodapop was the exact same way!"
"But he has a girlfriend, now," Darry tilted his head, confused.
"But at my age he didn't!"
"But he still found girls attractive."
"I do too! The girl who looks good in yellow!"
"There is no…'girl in yellow'," Darry said, looking at me as if I were insane.
"Yes there is!" I said, "she's in one of my classes!"
"But when has anyone actually made reference to this girl in yellow you speak of Ponyboy? No one… except for that Don't Say It Out Loud story… but you were gay in that. So in fan fic… she does not exist."
"I'm sure some Mary-Sue has come along and made herself that girl in yellow!"
"Yeah, you would think that, huh?" Sodapop nodded, "guess none of 'em really thought of doin' that."
-Suddenly the Mary-Sue authors reading this ran off to quickly write themselves as the girl in yellow. The Mary-Sue fics multiplied considerably in large numbers and every Mary-Sue hater out there cursed Fragile-Ego's name for bringing it up.
Darry then looked up at the time, "it's past curfew, anyway!" He spun around to me, glaring and shouting, "where the hell were you! I was up all night worrying about you! You stupid idiot, you never ever think! I should give you away to a foster home! Is that what you want! To leave!"
"Darry!" Sodapop shouted, "he isn't late! He's in fact an hour early!"
I stared in shock at my brother, trying to feel my heartbeat return, and hope I didn't look as white as I felt.
He looked back at the clock, "oh right… day light savings. My bad… But damn you, Ponyboy, damn you! You head straight to bed since you have school tomorrow and I swear to god, if you don't get your homework done and get all A's, I'm sending you away!"
"Why are you yelling at him?" Sodapop asked, a little scared.
Darry glared at him, "I DON'T KNOW! I'M GOING TO BED! THE REST OF YOU, I'LL SEE YOU IN HELL, BASTARDS!" He stormed off dramatically.
I shook my head, "Fragile-Ego has really lost all grasp of his character…"
Mary-Sue then began to whimper. We all turned and stared at her, but she ran out the door crying.
Me and Johnny looked at each other concerned, but in a you-do-know-we're-not-dating way, and then chased after her.
I hate her, I really do. But I wasn't that cold hearted to just leave her out there in tears.
Damn, she was a fast runner though! She ran so fast that she blew the trees down. Me and Johnny had to jump into some random car along the street and speed after her but she was still too quick. Damn, I forgot Mary-Sue had super fast speed. She made us follow her all the way to the park!
She stopped on the old play set and cried.
Me and Johnny somehow sat beside her, "what's wrong?"
She sniffed and whipped away her tears, "she tried her best damnit at trying to get Darry down! I mean god, how else was he meant to react at being woken up late at night when he had work in the morning! Wasn't like he was going to take Curly's hand and skip to the car, with all smiles!"
"I know, but you must let it go. But, like I said before, nobody cares about reading about her. And this isn't funny at all, we should really get moving onto the jokes."
"Oh, what jokes!" Mary-Sue cried, "this has just been crap after crap! She's quite obviously running out of cliché's and random insanity to do!"
Johnny smiled, "no she's not, don't worry!" That's when Johnny slipped on a banana peel and fell onto the ground, "silly me!" He chuckled.
"See!" Mary-Sue cried, "that wasn't funny! And she's already stretching it with the socs-rape joke!"
"Shh, that wasn't her best one, but I assure you she still has lots of jokes," I comforted her.
She smiled at me, "really?"
"Yes," I nodded.
That's when an unexpected exciting plot twist happened… the socs arrived in a car! Coincidently just like the Outsiders book!
They got out, smelling of alcohol and possibly something else.
"Well," Bob said stepping forward, "you know what greaser's are? White trash with… possibly greasy hair and non-rich families."
"Well you know what socs are!" Mary-Sue stepped forward, "white trash with mustangs and whatever the hell Madres are… if that is that right word!"
"I was going to say that!" I yelled at her, "you stole my line!"
"I did not! How was I supposed to know you were going to say that!" She said, as she hid The Outsiders behind her back, "it was just a strange coincidence!" I sighed frustratingly.
Bob then grinned drunkenly, "greaser bashin' time."
He grabbed me and pushed me into the fountain. I struggled but his friends came and also held me beneath the water. I'm dieing, I thought, as my vision became a red hazy blur.
3
2
1
I woke up coughing up water. I turned on my side and what I saw almost made me sick.
Mary-Sue was here and it hadn't all just been a dream.
But then I turned over onto my other side and saw Bob, laying in a pool of blood. I got up and threw up, and when I came back I walked over to Mary-Sue and Johnny.
"What happened!" I asked, panicking.
Mary-Sue got up and hugged me tightly, "oh, you're okay! Thank god!"
"What happened!" I repeated, pushing her away.
Johnny stared at his blood covered knife, "I… I…"
I looked over at Bob and noticed several holes in his body, quite obviously done only by a switchblade.
I looked back at Johnny. "what happened!"
Johnny sighed, "I've got Bob's blood on my knife… I shouldn't have stabbed him so many times."
"Stop changing the subject," I said, "what happened!"
"Johnny killed Bob," Mary-Sue said.
"Why, Johnny, why!" I yelled.
"After it looked like you were dead from drowning in the fountain… well he went near Mary-Sue."
I narrowed my eyes, "what had you been doing when I was being drowned!"
"I was discussing politics with Mary-Sue…" he said, a little embarrassed.
My jaw dropped.
"But after that," she said," they came after me. I held them off the best I could, but I didn't have my switchblade and I couldn't find a broken bottle, so I just used my sock."
"You're sock?"
Johnny nodded, "she was amazing, Ponyboy. But eventually you passed out so the rest came after her. So to protect her I killed Bob."
"We have to get out of here," I said.
"But where!" Mary-Sue asked.
"To Dally's!" Johnny said, grinning, "he'll know what to do!"
So we ran off to Dally's… which was actually Buck's.
3
2
1
"What?" Dally answered the door. The 3 of us stood there, cold and frightened.
"Johnny killed Bob," Mary-Sue said.
"Really?" Dally said, quite surprised. "You better come in then. And Ponyboy why you wet? You too Mary-Sue?"
I jumped when I saw she was dripping wet too. "How!" I asked, shocked.
Johnny answered me. "She dove in after you when I killed Bob. She saved you."
"Dove in? I was in a shallow fountain? How is that possibly?"
"I swam all over it too, and couldn't find you till it was almost too late," she said, then sighing happily, " but I found you in the end and pulled you back to shore."
"What?"
"You 3 better come inside," Dally said, pulling us in.
"SURPRISE!"
Inside was a massive crowd of people and they all jumped up, grinning like idiots. They were holding balloons and threw confetti. Also there was a big banner up saying, "Happy Surprise Birthday Party, Mary-Sue!"
"You guys!" She grinned, modestly, "you shouldn't have!"
I looked around confused. That's when Bob emerged from the crowd, completely alive and un harmed. He laughed, "we faked the whole death! Johnny was in on it too!"
"I was so scared," I said, "why would you do something that horrible?"
"For Mary-Sue of course," he smiled and hugged her, "happy birthday."
I groaned, and walked away. I sat at the bar and Buck walked over, cleaning a glass with a white towel. "Can I just have a glass of something strong?" I asked, sighing.
Buck flung the towel over his shoulder and shook his head, pointing at the sign for minimum age drinking. "Ponyboy, you know I can't."
"Nobody has to know," I pleaded.
"Darry would kill me. Besides… this isn't a bar."
"What?" I said, confused. I turned around in my bar stool and looked around, "what the hell is this place then!"
"A big house for partying? I'm not sure myself. I don't think anyone really is. Hell, it might be a bar?"
"That's just stupid!" I scowled.
He shrugged, "I'm just happy to actually be around when complete strangers from the street walk onto my property. I mean, the least they could do is come find me and say, 'hey, buck.' Instead it's just, 'we're here, lets find a room!' You know this is probably the first time I've actually appeared at my own home!"
Mary-Sue walked up to me, smiling, "I'm about to blow out the candles to my birthday cake."
"So?"
"Well I'm just hoping that the wish I'm going to make will come true."
"'kay…"
"You know what I'm going to wish for?" She smiled, fluttering her eye lashes.
"A sequel?"
"No, silly," she giggled, "for you to give me just one kiss."
I rolled my eyes, "my god, how cliché was that!" I stood up and yelled sarcastically, "raise your hand if you weren't expecting that!"
The must-be-high's jumped up and down with their hands in the air, "I did NOT see that one coming!" "What an original and exciting twist!" "I had no idea those two were going to hook up, though it was categorised under their names!" "More, more! I must have more!"
They continued to squeal excitingly. I tilted my head, staring at them. Mary-Sue snapped me out of it though and smiled, "so?"
"No."
"Aw, come on, Ponyboy," Buck said, grinning, "can't hurt."
"Yes, it will!" I shrieked, "nobody said anything about romance in this story!"
"Well, honestly, from the moment I met you guys I didn't think at all that I would hook up with any of you," Mary-Sue said, twirling her hair.
I glared at her, "yeah…"
Buck then shrugged, and said carelessly while staring at the bottom of the glass, "guess the rumours were true about you, Ponyboy, and you are gay."
I narrowed my eyes at him, "go and blow those candles out, Mary-Sue."
"How sweet!" The must-be-high's chanted, "you go, Ponyboy! I love Mary-Sue, she's the most original character I've ever met!"
Mary-Sue dragged me over to her cake where everyone was surrounded. She bent over it and her top caught on fire.
She screamed, but someone threw a glass of water on her, so only her top burnt away.
She giggled, "Isn't that oh so funny and embarrassing! I'm left in only my bra now!"
"My god, that was hilarious!" The must-be-high's laughed, "you're so funny!" "Poor, Mary-Sue… but how exciting is that!"
"Will someone shut them up?" I asked absently.
Mary-Sue closed her eyes, and then blew out the candles. Everyone cheered for her and then she grinned at me, "ready."
"Whatever…"
She stepped close to me and then placed her lips on mine. But as soon as they met mine I backed off yelping, "ow!"
I touched my lips gingerly, "you sparked me!"
"Yes, that would be the fireworks," she smiled, tilting her head.
"Huh!"
She hiccupped and a butterfly flew out her mouth, "wow, it's gonna take me a while to get the rest of them out."
"Ponyboy Curtis!"
I turned around and Bob was pushing through the crowd. Oh no, I thought.
"That's my ex girlfriend you just kissed!" He growled, grabbing me by the collar.
"I didn't want to! Honest!" I struggled against him but his arm was holding on too tight.
"You'll pay for that!" He growled, and he put up his fist.
THE END FOR THIS CHAPTER!
"Ohmigosh, cliffhanger!" a must-be-high gasped, "no you can't just end it there! I must know what happens!" "Does Ponyboy eventually come to like Mary-Sue, oh god, please say he does!" Another began to cry, "I just want them to get together sooo badly!" "Mary-Sue is so cool, gosh if only I were like her… which reminds me about a new story I'm writing."
"SHUTUP!" Ponyboy yelled angrily at them.
"How rude…" they shook their heads. "I know…"
5
4
3
2
1
So, that's it for this chapter. Hope you liked. Wasn't my best chapter, but I had to rush it by the end. Hopefully you all found it funny, I got a pretty funny joke I was gonna put in this one, but I thought I should probably put it in the next chapter.
I do have lots of material left to work with… it's makin' it into a joke which is so hard!
P.S The fan fiction introduction was not to actually make fun of the people who have wrote those stories, as I like one of the authors heaps. But it was more just so I could introuduce the Mary-Sue readers.