Hello Ranma, Genma, Happosai and Shampoo! PG-13
Niklas "Hawk" Jonsson

Summary: When the Tendo girls first meet the Saotomes, the Saotomes doesn't come alone. They've managed to pick up an early awakened Master Happosai and our favorite cat-shifting Chinese Amazon on their journey. Master Happosai has already declared Ranma his heir and passed on some of his techniques to him. Akane has never needed much encouragement to accuse Ranma of being a pervert, but this time around, she's actually right!

Disclaimer: Ranma ½, the characters and whatnot are not mine, though I certainly wish they were. The story is mine though, all mine. This series deals with mature subject matters and violence. If this disturbs you, don't read. But if it does, then why the heck are you watching the show/reading the manga in the first place?

Feedback/Flames: Yes, please. Both of them are equally fun to read, although I must admit that I greatly prefer the first variety. :)
I can be found on ICQ as 21771860 or through e-mail as iamhawk at yahoo dot com, more stories are available at my nifty lil' site at hawksgalaxy dot com or by clicking on my handle up above if you're reading this on fanfiction dot net.

"speech"
emphasis/shouts/Kindred Domination/post-hypnotic triggers
/thoughts/
/telepathy/
translation
+soundeffect/radio/telephone conversation/TV+

Previously, on 'Hello Ranma, Genma, Happosai and Shampoo!'

"How good are you two?" Akane asked, interested to find out more about these two strangers Martial Arts ability.

"Shampoo is the best of her generation, in a village with a 3000 year old tradition of Martial Arts. I don't think there's more then one or possibly two dozen other women in the world who can match up with her, if that. And most of those are Amazons themselves." Ranma replied. "I've been training since I was old enough to walk and have participated in more fights all across the world then I'd care to remember. The only ones who have managed to defeat me in the last year, are Happosai and Shampoo's grandmother. There's probably two or three more Elders in the village besides her grandmother who can kick my ass, according to Shampoo. But other then those, I've never come across anyone who's good enough to beat me right now." he finished, which annoyed Akane to no end, though she did manage to keep a rein on her temper. /I'll show him.../ she thought, eagerly anticipating putting him in his place.

He was faster then her, if the way he and Shampoo fought over food was any indicator. But she'd show him that speed wasn't all that counted. There was no way he could match up with her in either skill or strength, after all, she was the best Nerima had to offer!

Roll credits

Chapter Six:

"Oh, what a cute little kitten!" Kasumi cheerfully exclaimed as the recently fed fivesome was heading back towards the Tendo Dojo and the eldest Tendo sister spotted a youngish member of the feline species.

"Gck!" Ranma stuttered as his eyes opened as wide as humanly possible as he stared fearfully at the cute kitten.

"Shoo! Bad critter get away from Airen!" Shampoo snapped and suddenly brandished a throwing knife, which she launched at the cat which scampered off with a scared meow. Shampoo instantly moved over to Ranma and wrapped her left arm around his shoulders, glancing up at him with a sympathetic look. "Airen okay? Take deep breath."

"Y-y-yeah." Ranma managed to get out, nearly hyperventilating from what appeared to be genuine fear.

"Shampoo! Why did you scare that poor kitten?" Akane demanded to know, then looked over at Ranma with a confused expression. "And what's wrong with you? It was just a cat for crying out loud!" she asked, while Nabiki shrewdly noted that even Akane saying 'kitten' and 'cat' got a twitch and a barely suppressed yelp out of Ranma.

"Yeah, Saotome. What is it about cats that get your panties in a bind?" Nabiki asked with Ranma twitching once again as 'cats' were mentioned.

"Moron panda try brainless training technique. Make Airen react too-too bad when four-legged critter we just see is near or talked about." Shampoo replied. "Poor Airen." she lamented and rubbed Ranma's back.

"No training, no matter how 'brainless' could possibly do this." Nabiki claimed.

"Noisy Pervert Girl try being wrapped in fishy produce when tiny child, then get tossed into dark pit with starving ca... Bad critters." Shampoo responded. "Repeatedly."

"Mr Saotome did that!" Nabiki exclaimed and shook her head in revulsion. "I didn't think he seemed all that stable, but that sounds downright insane!"

"Moron Panda surprisingly insane at times. Surprised it even able to walk upright." Shampoo agreed.

"Well, at least that explains your fear of ca... Bad critters." Nabiki said, changing her wording as she saw how he begun to twitch as she had been about to say cat.

"Oh my. Mr Saotome shouldn't have done that." Kasumi stated and looked at Ranma with sympathy and concern in her eyes. "Are you all right now, Saotome-san?" she asked.

"I will be." Ranma replied and took a deep breath. "Hangin' around Shamps has made things better. ... Somewhat. Before that, I probably wouldn't still be around after having seen one of... Them." he admitted, before shrugging off Shampoo's comforting arm. She sighed and her shoulders slumped slightly, before she strode off to retrieve her blade from where she had thrown it.

"You're scared of c... Them?" Akane asked for clarification and Ranma nodded in response. She shook her head and then looked thoughtful. "Could be a problem, Kasumi feeds the neighbourhood... Well, she feeds them."

"You li-l-l-like 'em?" Ranma asked, eyeing Kasumi nervously.

"I do. They've often kept me company during the days." Kasumi admitted. "But they haven't been around lately for some odd reason. They seem to shy away from me these days." she added, which caused Ranma to exhale with relief, though he tried to keep it bottled up as Kasumi seemed faintly sad over the cats change in behaviour.

He wondered about that. Kasumi seemed like a nice person, but there was a sense of oddness around her, something which put him on edge and occasionally made the hairs on his arms rise. He wished that he'd advanced further in his training, so he could use Ki-sight to check her out. Genma had taught him internal techniques for the last couple of years and Happosai had started him on external techniques as well as deepening his knowledge of the internal ones, but he hadn't mastered any of them yet.

Or at least not any that didn't have some sort of sexual connection or application, which wasn't of any use to him at the moment.

He could sense something though, something odd. All three of the sisters had some sort of talent in Ki and quite possibly Chi manipulation to varying degrees.

Akane had managed a visible aura earlier, which was either a sign of great skill or great power. Considering how her emotions seemed to be allowed free reign and be under little conscious control, he guessed it was the latter as skill often required a greater amount of control then she seemed to have.

He could sense something of the potential in Nabiki. She must have greater then average potential, or he wouldn't have been able to sense it. But he wasn't advanced enough to be able to tell the extent of that potential. But seeing as how Akane had managed a visible aura of great magnitude, he guessed that Nabiki had a much greater potential then average. Things like these usually ran in the family.

He could sense potential from Kasumi as well, but she actually appeared to have some skill as well as inherent power, as she was constantly emitting faint tendrils of power, which usually was a sign of active manipulation being preformed. Though it could also mean that her power reserves were so great that her body couldn't completely contain them, so that she was constantly 'leaking' Ki. But something about her energy was distinctly off. He was in no way skilled enough to tell how or why, but her energy signature was vastly different from her sisters.

"Have you ever seen a therapist for this problem?" Nabiki asked.

"Huh? A what?" Ranma asked with a bewildered expression, broken out of his train of thought and ruminations of the eldest Tendo sister's internal energies.

"A psychologist, someone who could try to help you get over this phobia of yours." Nabiki clarified.

"A who to help me get over what?" Ranma asked, completely baffled at the unfamiliar words.

"I guess that answers that question." Nabiki sighed. "I'll ask Doctor Tofu to come over sometime. He's our family doctor, he might know somebody who could help you with this problem."

"Great idea, Nabiki! He might even know of some way to cure your curse!" Akane agreed enthusiastically. "Doctor Tofu is amazing, he'll know just what to do." she gushed.

"Come on brat. It's time for some training." Happosai declared when the odd fivesome returned to the Tendo Dojo and Ranma slowly nodded in response. While the Old Freak spent most of his time as a raging pervert, he did apparently take the fact that he'd named Ranma his heir sort of seriously from time to time. This appeared to be one of those times, he reflected as the old man dragged him off towards the Dojo.

"All right, Old Freak." Ranma sighed. "See you guys later. It was nice, we'll have to do this again sometime." he added to the four girls.

"I'll be looking forward to it, Saotome-kun." Nabiki replied with a half-smile. His table manners were atrocious, but once he settled down, he proved himself a somewhat apt conversationalist even if he was a bit boring and mundane compared to what she usually liked in a man.

"Thanks again for treating us, Saotome-san." Kasumi added. "I had a nice time."

"Thanks." Akane groused and then perked up as a notion occurred to her. "Mind if I come with to watch?" she asked.

"I don't much care either way. Ask the freak." Ranma replied with a shrug, then looked down at Happosai.

"Wear something nice and I'll allow it." Happosai responded with a grin. "Something lacy up above and a thong down below, with nothing else to ruin the imagery, would be perfect."

"Pervert!" Akane huffed and stormed off, muttering about perverts to herself.

"Bai bai, Airen. See later." Shampoo called and followed Kasumi and Nabiki to the living room, where Kasumi poured them all a cup of tea after making it.

"Don't you train with them too?" Nabiki asked.

"Train with Freak too too much bother. Spend more time fending Freak off tits then learn, Ranma no time learn much either. Much faster leave alone, then have Airen teach later when Old Freak no here." Shampoo replied with a shrug. "Is perfect timing besides, Xian Pu want talk in private with Tendo sisters." she added and cracked her knuckles.

"So, what did you have in mind for today, Old Freak? Panty removal? A technique to make clothes transparent?" Ranma asked and shook his head. "Or is it actually something non-perverted for once?" he continued, already plotting ahead and trying to come up with some way to adapt whatever he would be taught to something that could actually be of use.

"Insolent brat. While my Martial Art aptitude and genius isn't up to par with you, I still am a genius and I've had almost two hundred years to train, learn, adapt and perfect what I've picked up over the years. You learn faster then I ever have, but you're still at least seventy years to early to really challenge me." Happosai commented with a faintly displeased expression. "As such, I will require respect when I'm taking time out of my busy days to teach you some kernel of hard-earned wisdom." he explained and Ranma shrugged.

"Fine. So, what's on the perverted agenda today, Happosai-sensei?" Ranma asked, giving in without much of a struggle, as being stubborn only rarely got good results when Happosai was in one of his rare teaching moods.

"Your magical potential and aptitude are abysmal, but at least you do have some faint smattering of potential. It would be a shame not to take advantage of this fact, because you never know when such skills might come in handy." Happosai replied and rubbed his hands together.

"Magic?" Ranma asked with a shudder, succumbing to a full-body shiver.

"Magic." Happosai agreed and seated himself in the middle of the Dojo, indicating for Ranma to sit himself down in front of him. "Genma taught you about Ki, your own internal energy source. You've learned how to use that to move faster, react more quickly, put more strength behind your moves, enhance your staying power and endure injuries that would have crippled someone without your talent. I've begun to teach you about Chi, the external energy that is all around us and inherent to all living things. You've learned to use that as a means to sense unseen opponents and become more aware of your surroundings. You will learn how to use it to master your surroundings, control the weather, manipulate nature and restock your Ki."

"Now, we will move on to the third energy. Magic." Happosai announced and held out his left hand, palm up. "This is Ki." he said and forced his own considerable energy to move out of his own body, forming a ball of glowing energy floating above the palm of his left hand. "This is Chi." he continued and held out his right hand, palm up. Energy drifted over towards it, until he had a second ball of glowing energy floating above his right hand. "This... Is magic." he finished and a third ball of glowing energy formed in the air between the other two, hovering without support between his two hands.

"They're exactly the same." Ranma remarked, unable to tell the difference between the three balls of energy.

"A layman wouldn't be able to tell the difference between them." Happosai agreed. "You, will learn to do so." he added with a determined expression.

"Why don't I just focus on one of them? You said once that I had remarkable Ki reserves, so why can't I just focus on that? Why bother with Chi and Magic?" Ranma inquired.

"Ki comes from within. Your body creates it, your heart enhances it and your mind directs it. It's your own personal source of energy. But while you do have an astounding amount of it and a greater potential then I've ever come across in all my wanderings, there's always a limit. It's also vulnerable. There are many ways to disrupt Ki, either by rendering your body incapable of producing it, storing it or making your mind unable to direct it. There are also many techniques to remove or at least greatly lessen it. So while it is a very potential weapon, it is one that can be taken away from one." Happosai explained. "The reason why we won't focus entirely on Ki, is the same reason why Genma treats weapons with such disdain. They're useful tools, but if you rely too much on them, you'll be helpless if you can't use them."

"Chi is very nearly almost always around, to a greater or lesser amount. Along the Great Dragon lines or in the powerful Dragons Nests, the nexus or crossroads of two or more Dragon Lines, there's staggering amounts of it. The further removed from nature you are, the lesser the amounts of Chi available. Inside a great factory or in the middle of a dreary city centre, it's almost non-existent. There are techniques to block out Chi from an entire area and ways to completely rob an entire area of Chi, but the ones capable of doing that are few and far between. That means that even if you find yourself unable to access your Ki for some reason, you will still almost always be able to access Chi. The two of them are very similar in some ways. Chi is often just Ki, belonging to someone or something other then yourself. My Ki, is Chi to you. Your Ki, is Chi to me. Exceptions to this exist, but the two are most often very similar to each other." Happosai continued.

"Both Ki and Chi, as you know, are made up from two distinctly different polar opposites. Yin and Yang, Light and Dark, Hot and Cold, Life and Death, Physical and Spiritual. Whatever. People have called them a lot of things over the years and it varies from continent to continent. Here, we call them Yin and Yang. The ideal is if these two polar opposites are exactly equal to each other, but such is rarely the case. Most people have more of one then the other. You, have slightly more Yang then Yin. So did I in my youth, these days it's the opposite." Happosai said, then shook his head. "Anyway, the point I was going to make, is that since they're so similar to each other, they can be used to accomplish the same things. If your Ki is disrupted, you can use Chi to get fast, strong and durable. If Chi is blocked off, you can externalize your Ki in order to sense your surroundings."

"Both of them can also be infused or laced with emotions. Anger for added destructive potential. Confidence for more power. Love or even affection for healing effects to work better. Concern for the one you're looking for to make scrying more effective." Happosai finished and Ranma gulped as his incredibly focused gaze settled on him. The Old Freak was a joke most of the time, but when he got serious, his true brilliance shone through.

The fact that Happosai wasted so much of his time in pursuit of panties to steal and breasts to fondle, was probably the greatest loss the Martial Arts world had ever suffered. If he instead had spent his time developing his art and training a group of students, he'd likely be the most respected Martial Artist on the planet instead of a living joke.

"Magic, is different." Happosai then announced, growing increasingly more serious. "Nobody I've talked with has ever given me a reasonable explanation for what magic really is. Some claim that magic doesn't exist, that it's merely another word for Ki and Chi. Others claim that it's the other way around, that Ki and Chi are just different names for magic energy. Some claim that magic is divine energy, left over or on loan from the Kami. Others say that it's the next step in human evolution. Yet others believe that it's demonic powers. Whatever it really is, there are more theories then you can shake a stick at, more wildly varying energies then there are colours in the rainbow and more ways to access them then you could ever imagine. Some use pure neutral magic energy, some call upon great elemental powers, others use wildly dynamic energies, still more call upon evil energies and I've seen some very few use what I guess I can best describe as innate goodness. Some do it with staffs, others use little wands, some use Martial Arts, some speak in obscure languages, others use machines, some sing, many pray and there are even those that use drugs to do magic."

"What did you use?" Ranma asked, looking at the third ball of energy Happosai had created.

"Willpower." Happosai replied. "It's the one thing that all the examples I've mentioned have in common. No matter if you use a computer, scream foreign words for half an hour, wave a staff about, shoot yourself full of heroin or some combination of them, it still takes an application of will-power to actually do magic. If the will isn't there, a mage can yell in Latin and wave his staff about for hours, without getting the wanted results. But if the will is strong enough, none of the above is really necessary. All of them help, but they're not actually necessary if sufficient will is there."

"Ki can be disrupted. Chi can be blocked. What about magic?" Ranma asked. "If all it takes is willpower, it's like a weapon that can never be removed, isn't it?"

"The human will can be shattered, willpower lessened and concentration broken. There are also powerful rituals that can completely remove any and all magic potential from you. So the short answer is no, even magic can be taken away from you. But not easily." Happosai replied.

"So, I ask again. If all of them can be rendered useless, why train in all three?" Ranma asked.

"Because it's astonishingly rare for somebody to have access to all three. I know of only three. You, me and a girl I met when I was younger." Happosai answered. "So the chances of you coming up against someone who can block off all three sources of energy is nearly non-existent." he continued and smiled. "That's the weakness with Genma's anti-weapon-beliefs. Sure, a weapon can be taken away from you. So can two. Even three. But the more of them you have, the smaller is the chance that you'll find yourself without one in a pinch. And if one is trained in the use of both weapons and without them, having one along is just a benefit."

Ranma slowly nodded. Happosai had talked about Ranma's non-weapon approach to things before and he had to admit that when held up to close scrutiny, most of Genma's arguments against weapons were found to be rather hollow.

He'd still never ever wind up being as reliant on weapons as some he'd met over the years, but he no longer held to a strict non-weapon approach to things.

And his opinions on what constituted a weapon had also changed greatly. He looked down and saw Happosai's pipe sticking out of his dirty Gi. It seemed innocent enough, but when reinforced with Ki or Chi, it became nearly unbreakable and extended the Old Freaks reach quite a bit. Innocent as it looked, it could be a fearsome weapon in the right hands and the Old Freak certainly knew how to use it for the best results.

He shook off these kind of thoughts as Happosai, now when he was done with talking about the different kinds of energy Ranma could use, instead started teaching him about how to differentiate between them and how to go about building up his magic reserves in preparation for being taught his first spell, which would come when his energy reserves had increased a bit.

"... sleep, no need wake up."

Nabiki stopped mid-stride on her way downstairs for a glass of water, her head swivelling around to glare at the door to the guest room that Ranma and his father used. Happosai had taken the other one and none had dared to protest against it. Kasumi had volunteered to take Shampoo in her room, as that was slightly larger then Nabiki's or Akane's.

So.

Why had she just heard Shampoo's voice coming from the guest room?

Nabiki slowly crept up to the door and painstakingly slow opened it, peeking inside wondering what was going on.

Kasumi would have her head if she knew what she was doing, but Nabiki decided to risk it. After all, one could never have too much information, but having too little could cause serious problems.

During their earlier conversation, she'd gotten the impression that Shampoo wasn't intimate with Ranma, much to Shampoo's own consternation. So, why was she in his ( and Genma's ) bedroom?

She wondered once again if she was doing the right thing here. Not only could she get a stern glance from Kasumi, but Shampoo herself seemed rather intimidating and she didn't think that the Chinese girl would stop with a mere glare if Nabiki managed to annoy her in some manner.

Especially not after earlier, when Kasumi and Nabiki had carefully and slowly explained the situation and why they were even considering the stupid deal that Soun and Genma had made.

It wasn't that she was stupid, as Nabiki had first pegged her as. No, Shampoo was actually rather clever. She just had problems adjusting to a new language. In fact, she had to be extraordinarily bright, as she hadn't been studying Japanese for very long. But although she could make herself understood, some nuances of the language still eluded her and she sometimes had problems understanding others. So Nabiki and Kasumi often found themselves having to go over earlier parts, explaining with other words, before Shampoo grasped everything.

What had finally made her understand the situation and why the two of them was making a play for 'her' man was when Kasumi brought up honour.

It seemed that she was intimately familiar with that particular concept and while she still didn't like it, she at least understood that the Tendo girls had little choice in the matter.

Or well, that Kasumi had little choice anyway. Nabiki wasn't overly concerned with honour for the same reasons that Kasumi were, the only reason why Nabiki cared at all, was because a reputation for dishonourable behaviour could be held against her later on in life. As she imagined herself having a career in the business world, before moving on into politics, she couldn't afford any horrific skeletons in her closet as they were sure to be dug up at some later point in life.

No, the reason why she was even willing to consider this silly arrangement, when it had been made clear that Kasumi would accept if none of the others would, was mostly because Ranma was hot, unexpectedly smart and would most likely be dynamite in bed.

She took a quiet deep breath and then pushed open the door a little further, looking past the snoring panda to where Ranma was sleeping curled up on a futon, with a blue blanket stretched out over him.

Behind his back, Shampoo was kneeling and gently stroking him, pushing his unruly hair into some semblance of order.

"Airen sleep well. Is just me, just Xian Pu." Shampoo mumbled as Ranma stirred in his sleep, calming down as she spoke with him. "Bad critters no harm Airen, no while Xian Pu here."

She looked exhausted and it was clear that she needed her sleep, but still wouldn't move away from Ranma's side.

"Hey. What's going on, Shampoo?" Nabiki whispered from the door, opening it a little wider.

"Airen dream nightmares." Shampoo replied in a low whisper. "Always do after meet with bad critters." she added with a sigh, then looked over at Nabiki. "Xian Pu able ask Nabiki favour?" she asked, never halting her stroking, comforting motions.

"Sure." Nabiki whispered back after a few moments of considering the situation. Having Shampoo owing her one could come in handy later on.

"Nabiki stroke Airen hair for minute until Xian Pu back. This one need visit little girl's room." she responded with an embarrassed expression.

"Sure thing, Shampoo." Nabiki replied and kneeled down at the head end of Ranma's futon, reaching out to stroke his hair for Shampoo.

"Xian Pu soon be back, in other form." Shampoo stated as she rose and started removing her clothes.

"What are you doing!" Nabiki hissed as loud as she dared.

"Xian Pu go toilet, then change shape. Try get Airen used to... Cats." she replied and stepped out of her panties, leaving them on the ground. "Seem help some. Have tried before." she explained and then tip-toed off towards the bathroom, as Nabiki shook her head at the brazen Amazon. What if Genma or Soun woke up and saw her in the nude? What if Ranma did?

She definitively had guts anyway, Nabiki had to give her that.

"Mmmno..." Ranma muttered in his sleep and Nabiki returned to stroking his head, a task which had slipped from her mind as Shampoo shocked her by undressing.

"Ssshh, it's okay." Nabiki said, though she had no idea why. She hadn't intended to do so, it just slipped out of her. But it seemed to do the trick, as Ranma calmed down and fell silent again, only his deep breathing breaking the silence of the room.

True to her word, Shampoo returned after a few minutes, this time walking on all fours in her cursed form. She determinedly walked straight over to Ranma and curled up against his chest.

Ranma reacted badly at first, starting to tremble and shiver for almost three full minutes, before he seemed to calm down. Shampoo didn't seem to take it any better, the little cat trembled as well and Nabiki could see tears creeping out of the cats eyes.

Nabiki could understand it, somewhat. If she liked somebody as much as Shampoo seemed to like Ranma, who reacted that badly to her mere presence, she'd probably cry too.

But either Ranma himself craved the comfort of it, or he somehow subconsciously sensed Shampoo's distress and focused on that instead of his fear of cats, because he stopped trembling and his left arm moved, curling around Shampoo the cat, holding her against his chest.

Nabiki remained kneeling at his side, stroking his hair for a few minutes longer, before she stood up and looked down at the two of them. Shampoo opened her eyes and looked up at her in silence, before she nodded her cat-head in silent gratitude and closed her eyes again, resting her head on the back of Ranma's hand.

Nabiki observed them in silence for a while longer, before she quietly walked out of the room, closing the door behind her.

"Are they asleep?" a subdued voice asked and Nabiki nearly leaped right out of her skin at the fright, twirling around to face her older sister.

"Kasumi! You frightened me!" she hissed under her breath. "What! Yeah, they're asleep." she replied, holding her right hand against her chest, wondering if it was possible for her heart to beat it's way right out of her ribcage with the pace it was beating at right now.

"Sorry." Kasumi apologised as usual, though Nabiki couldn't help but notice that it sounded... Less sincere then usual. Not for the first time, she wondered just what was going on with Kasumi lately. She recalled what she had seen a week earlier and just barely managed to suppress a frightened yelp as Kasumi moved in closer.

"You were awake when she went to him?" Nabiki asked, trying to distract herself from recalling Kasumi doing anything unnatural, telling herself that she had just imagined that too, trying to convince herself that nothing at all was wrong with her gentle older sister.

"I wouldn't let her go at first. It's just not right for an innocent young girl to visit an unmarried mans sleeping quarters." Kasumi replied. "But she started crying when he cried out the first time and... After the third time, I couldn't keep her here any longer. I don't approve, but..." Kasumi trailed off and looked over at the closed door behind Nabiki. "There's nothing... Indecent going on in there, is it?"

"He's sleeping and she's a cat. Nothing will happen." Nabiki assured Kasumi.

"Oh, I guess that's okay then." Kasumi responded and assumed a more cheerful expression. "Good night, Nabiki."

"Good night, Kasumi." Nabiki bid her older sister as she returned to her room and Nabiki continued her interrupted trip to the kitchen for a glass of water.

The End! ( For now... )