Chapter 8

Bam had been in the hospital for a week before he was allowed any visitors. His parents and Jess were the first ones to visit him. Bam clung to his parents at first, while practically, though not purposely, shunning Jess. That was because he didn't recognize this "big boy" as his brother, since he was expecting to see Jess as a little kid.

They were trying to get Bam to realize that he was much older than he believed he was. Bam just thought they were being silly and went on his merry, delusional, way.

Jenn had stopped by as well, much to Bam's surprise. But he quickly grew attached to her, making her his new favorite playmate.

As much fun as he was having with Jenn and his big brother Jess when they were there, he couldn't help but complain that there was no one there his age to play with. He had to be constantly reminded that he was actually twenty-five and not five years old, but he didn't buy it.

One day his friends, including Johnny Knoxville and Steve-O, came to visit him. Bam, of course, didn't have the slightest clue who they were. Since, in his mind, he was only about five years old, he had forgotten the people he met when he was in his late teens and early twenties.

"Hello there." Brandon said as they all sat at a table with Bam. "What's your name?"

"Brandon."

"Really? That's cool because my name is Brandon too."

"It is?" he asked with a smile.

"Yes. Nice to meet you." He shook Bam's hand.

"We heard that you have been kind of… down in the dumps lately because you don't have any one to play with you around here."

"Ev'ryone here is too old. And they're funny, but not the kind of funny that makes you laugh."

"That's too bad. Well that's why we're here, Brandon." Ryan said. "I'm Ryan by the way."

"Hi Ryan."

"And this is Raab Himself." Ryan continued.

"You have a funny name." Bam giggled.

"Yeah?" Raab said. "Well it's not as funny as his name. You know what his name is?' Bam shook his head. "His name is Rake."

"Rake!" Bam started laughing. "That's funny!"

"Oh hey." Johnny said once Bam stopped laughing. "We haven't introduced ourselves yet. I'm Johnny, and this guy is Steve-O."

"Nice to meet you." Bam said with a grin.

"Well aren't you a polite little boy. Who taught you that?"

"My mom did. And my dad."

"Oh well they did a good job. Hope we don't ruin it." Brandon said, half sarcastically.

"Oh Brandon." Johnny said to Bam. "Do you have any nicknames? Because we don't want to confuse you and the other Brandon."

"Bam Bam."

"Bam Bam? That's a good nickname. How did you get it?"

"Pop pop calls me it."

"Your Pop pop calls you Bam Bam?" Asked Johnny. Bam answered with a nod. "Would you like us to call you Bam Bam?"

"I like Bam Bam."

"Ok so we'll take that as a yes then." Ryan said.

There was a Styrofoam tray sitting on the table in front of Bam that held the remnants of a meal. Steve-O spied the tray and pointed to it.

"Hey Bam Bam, what's that tray for?" He asked.

"That was my lunch."

"Doesn't look like you finished all of it." Raab said in a mock-scolding tone.

Bam looked at the tray. The only thing that was left on it was a couple pieces of asparagus. Bam frowned.

"Yeah that's sparegis. It's icky so I didn't eat it."

"Well I wouldn't want to eat the icky sparegis either." Steve-O said. "But I can take care of that for you."

"How?"

"Watch this."

Steve-O picked up the offending pieces of asparagus and turned around in his seat, making sure that no one could see what he was doing. He turned back around and he had a piece of asparagus hanging from each nostril in his nose.

"There, all taken care of." Bam started laughing, which caused the other guys to laugh as well. "What? What's so funny? Oh man do I have something hanging from my nose?"

"You're so funny!" Bam squealed. "The sparegis is in your nose!" He clapped his hands as he started laughing again.

"The sparegis is in my nose? Well how'd it get up there?"

"You put it up there!" Bam said through his hysterics.

Ryan reached over and pulled the asparagus from Steve-O's nose and put it back on the tray.

"Ok Steve-O that's enough of that. We got the joke."

"Do it again!" Bam protested.

"No. I can only put things up my nose once a day. Doctor's orders."

"Awwww!" Groaned Bam.

Johnny looked at Bam with a grin. "Hey you want to see something neat?"

"Yeah!"

"Come here. I got a secret for ya." Johnny whispered in Bam's ear, and Bam giggled. "Try it."

"Ok."

A second later Rake jumped up from his spot and shouted in pain.

"What's the matter Rake?"

"That fucker just kicked my shin under the table!" Rake pointed to Bam.

Bam gasped. "Ooooohhhh…. You just said a naughty word!"

The other guys laughed at how cute Bam sounded.

"Man Rake! Can't you control your potty mouth for once?" Brandon asked.

"Yeah. Hey Bam Bam what should we do to teach Rake a lesson?' Asked Ryan.

"Um… get the soap!" Bam chimed. "He said a naughty word now you have to wash his mouth out!" He sang.

"All right, you heard him Rake. Raab go find some soap so we can wash his mouth out like Bam Bam said."

"No! You're not going to wash my mouth out with soap. I just won't say it again."

"Them's the rules Rake. You say a naughty word and you get your mouth washed out with soap. Right Bam Bam?"

Raab returned with a bar of soap from the restroom and shoved it into Rake's mouth. The rest of them laughed as Rake spit the soap out.

"That stuff is nasty!" Rake complained.

"Well you shouldn't have said that naughty word, right Bam Bam?"

"Right!"

The group of guys sat and had a good time for a while. Finally the nurse came up to the table and said that visiting hour was over. Bam looked at them with a smile as they started to leave.

"You're going to see me again, aren't you?" He asked hopefully.

"Of course we are, Bam Bam." Ryan said.

"We wouldn't miss hanging out with you for the world." Brandon added.

They messed up Bam's hair with a few noogies, and said their goodbyes. Then Bam was escorted back to his room for some rest. So far that day was the best day he had while at the hospital.