For a supposed genius Ritsu was kind of a moron sometimes.

Teru could be an idiot too, sometimes, that one time that he didn't like to talk about. That one time that he didn't need Ritsu throwing back in his face every single time they fought about this. 'This' being the Claw member currently standing in the middle of Ritsu's bedroom tossing his coat onto the bed. 'This' being the redheaded near stranger who somehow thought that wearing a Christmas shirt on December thirty first as somehow an acceptable thing to do. 'This' being the supposed love of Ritsu's life or whatever. 'This' being the guy that could turn Ritsu from a genius to a complete and total moron in ten seconds.

This being Suzuki Sho, first born son of Suzuki Touichirou and heir to everything.

Everything being Claw. The entire organization…and the world, too, if they were successful in taking it over. Sho was going to succeed his father, who was apparently aging if the forums were to be believed. He was losing his touch, they had said, and he was delegating more and more to his oldest daughter…Shigeko…not that Teru had been doing any real research on Shigeko. It had just come up. Apparently Suzuki was starting to lose it and a lot of people weren't sure how much time he had, especially with all the assassination attempts…he wondered if anyone had taken Teru up on his letter bomb idea. Either way Suzuki Touichirou, supposedly, wasn't long for this world and his son would succeed him…though there was some discussion over who his oldest son even was.

Teru wouldn't be asking.

In front of him was the best source of information on Claw that they would ever get. That was what Ritsu would say as soon as he got the hearts out of his eyes. He was practically swooning like a shoujo girl, or maybe he was on the verge of a nosebleed like in those trashy shows Reigen watched when he thought Teru wasn't paying attention. Either way he looked like a moron right now…he was a moron. He didn't care what Sho knew or the fact that he'd sworn to Ritsu that he was on their side. He didn't want Sho here at all!

But, of course, Ritsu wasn't going to listen to a word he had to say.

"You're an idiot, you know that? I can't believe that you invited him in! You know something, Kageyama? You can't bring you-know-what up anymore. Not after this." Said Teru. He crossed his arms and shook his head. He knew that he had said it the last time but, yeah, Ritsu had lost the right to bring up what happened with Shigeko. At least Teru had learned from his actions. Ritsu, somehow, still hadn't learned even after all of this time!

"Can I hit him, please?" asked Sho, turning to Ritsu and actually giving him…Teru knew those eyes. He gave girls those eyes all the time. He knew they worked, that was why he did it…but they had better not have worked in this case!

But of course they did. Of freaking course.

"Don't." said Ritsu, giggling…actually giggling! Teru would have torn his hair out if he had been a lesser man. But he wasn't. he was, if anything, composed…and he was going to stay that way. Reigen had told him, before that the first person to lose their temper lost the argument. It didn't matter what you said after you lost control, the fact that you had lost control in the first place meant that anything that you had said before losing control was erased from people's minds and anything that you said afterwards was ignored. People who were right didn't lose control. People who were right were just that, right, and they didn't have to scream and shout to defend their positions. Their positions defended themselves….

Though Reigen had also told him to never argue with a moron, either.

"Why not? He just called you an idiot! Also he ripped my sister's heart out and shit, and I can't just let him get away with that. That's not how it works." Said Sho

"I know what he did, but don't hit him. I need him and we're friends, I guess." said Ritsu

"You guess?" asked Teru. Never argue with an idiot and never be on an idiot's side, either. If you were on an idiot's side then you were an idiot but association. Choose your social circle wisely, Reigen had said, though he had said that when he caught Teru trying to get the blood out of his school shirt. There had been a lot of blood that fight…and he wasn't going to stop fighting…but he could admit when Reigen was right. Never side with an idiot…

Even when that idiot was your best friend.

"You know what I mean." Said Ritsu, his eyes meeting Teru's. He knew what Ritsu was talking about…and for a moment he wanted to leave. If Ritsu wanted to be a moron then, fine, he could be a moron all on his own. He…he needed Teru…and Teru could use the help…so he stayed. He stayed and he kept his cool.

Mostly.

"And you know what I mean. Ritsu, you're being a moron right now and you know it. You know how dangerous Claw is, you know what happened to me and…and you just…you just invited this guy into your house! You just let him walk right in the front door-" said Teru

"He let himself in through the window." Said Ritsu

"That-that doesn't help! That actually just makes the whole thing sound worse!" said Teru

"It was unlocked, it's not like I broke it or anything…and you need to lock your windows. If I can get in then, like, a serial killer or a maniac or something can come in and then you'd get axe murdered or chainsaw murdered or, um, a guy in a hockey mask could put you in a bunch of Saw traps-" said Sho

"Don't be stupid." Said Teru. He couldn't even believe what he had just heard. Sho was messing with him…right? Nobody could have been that much of a philistine…right? Even Ritsu knew better than that and his taste was just as pedestrian.

"Hey! Just because stuff happens in movies doesn't mean that it can't happen in real life. People get chopped up and axe murdered in life all the time. Otherwise they wouldn't make movies about it. Art imitates life." said Sho

"No, I meant that you were being an idiot. Friday the Thirteenth and Saw don't take place in the same universe. Also, Jason isn't smart enough to set Saw traps for someone…and anyway those movies suck." Said Teru. And to think that Ritsu was supposed to be the smart one out of the two of them…and this was who he chose to risk his life for.

"Ritsu, your friend is an idiot. Those are the best movies ever. Just when you think that they ran out of ways to chop the people up or whatever they figure out new ones! It's like a bottomless pit of ideas!" said Sho, way too loudly if Teru's opinion held any weight. He was glad that Ritsu's parents weren't home. Not only would they have had a lot of questions but he would have looked worse to them if they saw him keeping company with someone like Sho.

"They're pedestrian. There's no story to it at all. Now if you want story-" said Teru

"Please, no more. I don't want to talk about Mother. He doesn't want to talk about Mother. Nobody wants to talk about Mother!" said Ritsu

"I saw that movie…it was the worst thing I've ever seen, and I'm counting those Frozen fan cartoon things that my sister likes!" said Sho

"Shigeko still likes Frozen?" asked Teru, quickly, before he could think. That had been…information gathering on the enemy. Shigeko had been promoted, if the forum was to be believed she pretty much ran the whole city of Tokyo. He needed to know as much as he could about her for…for reasons. Recon reasons or…or something. He didn't care if she still liked Frozen and he couldn't even remember if she had been wearing a Frozen dress or not that first time she'd rescued him…or if her favorite color had been blue…

He didn't care about Shigeko anymore as anything other than an enemy.

"Yeah, it's her favorite thing or whatever. She's always watching fan cartoons and listening to fan songs and-hey! Don't ask me about my sister! She doesn't like you because you're a dickhole and you have really bad taste in movies, too!" said Sho

"He's half right, you know." said Ritsu, smiling just a little…Teru knew that smile. He'd made plenty of girls smile like that before…damn it. Of course. He was in love with Sho after all and Teru knew better than most people just how stupid love could make you, how it could ruin your judgement. It was worse than drinking, Reigen had said, being in love with someone….but Ritsu was supposed to be smarter than this. Wasn't that what the wall of awards was downstairs for? To show the world that he was, supposedly, a genius? In love or not he should have been smarter than this!

"Why are you on his side? Why are you this dumb? I really want to know." said Teru

"You sure you don't want me to kick his ass or something?" asked Sho. Ritsu looked down and shook his head….was he blushing right now? He better not have been…he was supposed to be better than this, smarter than this. That was why he had declared himself to be their leader….supposedly because he was above making the same mistake that Teru had made.

"No, I'm ok, leave him alone." Said Ritsu. He waved Sho away. Sho grabbed his hand and squeezed it…they were really were flirting. Teru used his powers to break their hands apart. Ritsu put up a barrier and glared at him. He didn't care. Ritsu could glare all the he wanted, that didn't mean that he was anywhere near in the right.

"You know something? I would really, truly, like to see you try. Right now. Come on, let's go!" said Teru. Maybe if he kicked Sho's ass Ritsu would realize that he wasn't anything special, that he wasn't worth it. He wasn't even that cute, really. He dressed like his mom picked his clothes out, his hair looked like he didn't even know what a brush was, and his face could have been mistakes for a planetarium. Ritsu might have been kind of an asshole but he could have found a better boyfriend easily. It wasn't like it was hard to get girls to make out with you and guys should have been even easier. If he just stopped getting his clothes at Costco, started getting serious about taking care of his skin, and grew another ten centimeters then he wouldn't have had any trouble finding another guy. Then he could have dropped Suzuki Sho and focused on the big, stopping Claw from taking over the world, picture.

"Don't fight, you won't accomplish anything. You're just going to end up getting hurt and trashing my room and I don't want to deal with either of those things right now." said Ritsu

"I could totally kick his ass though, right? You know I could. I'd do it if you asked me to." said Sho

"I think it would be a draw, but I don't want to waste our time finding out. We're all on the same side here and, really, the both of you are being ridiculous. Teru, especially." Said Ritsu

"I am not being-" said Teru

"How am I being ridiculous? He started it." Said Sho

"Yeah, he did, but you don't have to keep it going." Said Ritsu

"You sound just like my sister." Muttered Sho. Teru looked up. Shigeko…he had questions…ones that he knew he shouldn't have even wanted to ask. He had loved her, they'd hooked up, and now he was onto other girls. That was just how it worked. You met a girl, hooked up with her, and then that was it…sometimes the girl tried to honey trap you. Sometimes the girl only pretended to love you to…to get you onto her side. Sometimes the girl did this big, amazing, thing with you and then…and then she just…and then it didn't mean anything to her…but that was ok. That was how hookups worked. That was just how it worked when you were an adult…and Teru was pretty much an honorary adult. He didn't care at all about Shigeko anymore.

He hardly even remembered her.

"Maybe you should go back home to her, then, before someone comes looking for you. Think about it, Ritsu, for five seconds. He's here. That means that people either know where he is or they're going to be looking for him, find him here, and then we're back to where we started. I don't know about you but I don't think that we can fight off all of Claw with just us and the five guys we found!" said Teru. He covered his mouth as soon as he realized what had come out of it. Damn it! How could he have been so careless!?

"You have more guys? That's great! Me and Fukuda only have two other guys and your guys makes…nine guys! Hey! We could start a soccer team if we wanted." Said Sho. He gave Teru a look there. One that said 'hey, I remember you like soccer because I bitched at you all day because the only games you had were FIFA' to which Teru gave a look of his own. One that he hoped fully said 'fuck off' and 'fuck off right now' and maybe even 'why aren't you fucking off right now?' but, of course, Sho either didn't notice or didn't care. Ritsu, however, did and gave a glare of his own. One that said 'you're on thin ice, Hanazawa'.

"A soccer team has eleven people…but that doesn't matter! There is no way in hell that I am telling you anything and Ritsu's going to keep his mouth shut, too. I see through you even if he doesn't and-and you need to get out of here before I get you out!" said Teru

"Do you really think I'm working for my Dad right now? Do you actually think that he sent me? Are you really that stupid? Do you have brain worms or something?" asked Sho

"Is your family name 'Suzuki'?" asked Teru. Sho rolled his eyes…like he had any right to…

"Yeah, but just because I'm his son doesn't mean I'm his clone or whatever. I want to take Dad down just as bad as you do…actually what I really want to do is put my sister in charge, she's pretty awesome, but anyway that doesn't mean that I'm trying to fuck with you guys right now. I mean if you think about it for more than ten seconds it makes sense. If I was trying to take you guys down then I would have called asset acquisition or the hit squad or just one of the Scars. I didn't because I'm not going to get my fucking boyfriend captured!" said Sho. Ritsu was buying this. Ritsu was actually…that was exactly what Sho would have said if he was setting some kind of trap for them. Teru just didn't know what…this would have been so much easier if Ritsu hadn't been there. He could have just cracked Sho's head in and sent him running. He could have shown him who was boss…but he couldn't. Not while Ritsu was there…their self-proclaimed boss….

Damn it, Ritsu…damn it!

"See? So stop worrying. You'll make yourself break out." Said Ritsu with a laugh. That same dry laugh…that same…Teru stayed calm. He had to stay calm…and not just because, yes, he would end up breaking out if he lost it. Ritsu was being such a moron right now and…and he couldn't afford to be a moron. He had to be the one with a brain between them. He had to be the one with planning skills…he had to be the one to figure out what to do with all of this.

"You know what? Fuck you both, I'm going home. You guys can stay here and court danger or make plans or make out or…or whatever. I'm done." Said Teru

"Bye Teru, see you next year!" said Ritsu as he waved him off…really. He actually…if he had been anyone else then Teru would have kicked his ass…but he wasn't anyone else, he was Ritsu. He was a moron but he was Ritsu. He was…he was Teru's friend whether he liked it or not, and right now there was a whole lot of the 'not' happening. Honestly. He was always so stupid when it came to Sho…but Teru didn't have to stick around for this stupidity.

Let him get captured.

Teru had been about to say something to that effect. Go on, get captured, see if I care…but he didn't. Mostly because he did care, first of all, he cared a lot. He cared if he got up in the morning and found Ritsu gone. He cared if he let his guard down and then his friend…he cared a lot…but right now Ritsu didn't want him to care. It pissed him off…it pissed him off so much that he had to leave, for both of their own goods. Maybe Sho was telling the truth…or maybe he was the best liar in the world. Maybe Teru would wake up tomorrow to Ritsu begging his forgiveness…or rubbing it in his face that he'd been right…or begging to be rescued…either way Teru would deal with it. But not now.

He couldn't be around Ritsu right now, not when he was being a moron.