Chapter 12

Bam kicked his feet a few times. He rolled over, not realizing how close to the edge he was, and fell off of the bed. The blankets somehow managed to wrap and tangle around his legs. Sitting up he rubbed his eyes and grumpily gazed around the room.

"Ooohhh!" He groaned as he tried to untangle himself from the blankets.

He wiggled and squirmed for a second before hitting the palms of his hands on the floor in frustration. A nurse came into his room and chuckled lightly as she caught sight of Bam on the floor.

"Did we fall out of bed?" She asked as she assisted Bam with his blankets.

He grumbled under his breath.

"What was that? I didn't quite catch you."

"Nothin'." He grouched.

"Well now aren't we Mr. Sunshine this morning."

"You're not funny." Bam stood up and crawled back into bed to sulk. The nurse spread the blanket across him.

"Well grumpy butt. What's the matter with you? You're normally so cheerful in the morning."

"I had a bad dream and then I fell out of bed. Geeze, wouldn't you be grumpy too?" He said, while sounding like a cross between himself and the child.

"I suppose so. Why don't you tell me about your dream? Would that make you feel better?"

"No."

"No What? It wouldn't make you feel better?"

"No I don't want to tell you my dream."

"Ok fine. So Brandon are you going to go back to sleep then?"

"Bam." He mumbled.

"What?"

"Bam." He repeated, turning away from her.

"I don't get it. What do you mean by, Bam?"

"I don't want to be called Brandon any more. Call me Bam."

"Oh! Ok, Bam Bam. So you're…"

"No not Bam Bam. Just Bam."

"Ok, just Bam." She smirked. "So you're going to sleep some more I take it?"

"I'm gonna try any way."

"All righty then."

The nurse turned and left Bam alone in his room. Once he was sure that he was alone, Bam opened his eyes and sat up.

He drew his knees up to his chest and rested his hands on them. He felt disturbed by the dream he had. It wasn't making sense to him, and yet part of it made perfect sense.

The thing is, he wasn't sure which part made sense, or even if all of it did. He tilted his head back and closed his eyes, trying to get his mind off of the dream.

As he lied back down he folded one arm and placed it behind his head. He knew that he wasn't going to be able to get back to sleep so he decided to concentrate on the ceiling for a while.

The ceiling bored him for it all it was, was plain white tile. Everything in his room was white. White walls, white floor, white sheets, white bedspread… Well his bedspread had a hint of blue in it but it didn't matter. It was very boring to him.

He just wanted to do something to change his surroundings, even if he had to break out of the hospital to do it. All he knew was, he wasn't going to keep his room the way it was.

It needed a Bam touch if he was going to stay there. But how was he going to change it? He didn't have any paint or anything.

He closed his eyes and turned over onto his side. Now instead of thinking about his strange dream, he was trying to think of ways he could make his room more comfortable for him.

Hey Bam.

His eyes popped open to the sound of his own voice in his head. "W…what?" He sat up and looked around.

Bam it's me. Please just listen to me.

"No you're not doing this to me. Not now. That…. That was just a dream."

If you say so Bam. I'll just be waiting here until you're ready to face me.

"Why are you doing this to me?"

I'm trying to help you. Now I can't help you if you don't listen.

Don't listen to him Brandon. He doesn't really wanna help you.

"No! Not this again! That was just a dream!"

Brandon it's ok I'm here to help you again.

What the fuck? How in the hell did you manage to come back here?

I'm always here, just like you. Only I'm here to help Brandon. You just want to hurt him like you did before.

Bam sat at the edge of his bed staring at the floor. He put his shaking hands over his ears and began to rock back and fourth.

"No! No! Leave me alone!"

Bam it's ok. All you have to do is listen to me. I'll take care of the little shit.

Don't do it Brandon! Don't let him take over!

"No! Stop it! Please just leave me alone!" He began to cry. "Why are you doing this to me?" He closed his eyes tight and squeezed more tears out.

When he opened his eyes again a box of tissues was held in front of his face.

"That sounds like quite a dream Brandon." Doctor Dorian said as he sat back into his seat.

Bam plucked a tissue from the box and dabbed his tears away. "It seemed like it really happened." He said with a sniff.

"I know, Brandon, I know. Dreams are capable of being like that. They tend to play tricks with your mind."

"I don't want this dream again." He said sounding very much like the little boy. "I don't understand it."

"Well Brandon. That's what we're going to figure out together. It could simply be exactly that, a dream. Or it could be a little more, a compilation of your internal battle with your conscience over control of your mind. I realize that you probably don't understand what I mean by that right now, but we have plenty of time, and much more therapy sessions to figure everything out."

"I don't want to be in the hospital any more. I wanna go home." Bam said softly as he sank into his chair further.

"I know you do Brandon. Believe me, we all want you to be able to go home. We're all doing our best to help you get better. It's also up to you to get better."

"I thought I was."

"You are, you are. But there's so much more you have to do on your own that this therapy can't fix alone."

"Like what?"

"You'll know."