House Loyalties
by: angelicmayuka
Chapter 5: Make
Harry's P.O.V.
We finally made it to the Trophy Room and I couldn't forget the look on Snape's face when he was talking about us making fools of ourselves. The utmost glee on his face at the thought of what he was going to subject us to later, frankly, it scared the crap out of me. I didn't want to just forget it though, I had a feeling when they said to get to know one another, that they meant it. I knew Parkinson wouldn't start, so I did.
"So..." I muttered, mentally kicking myself. I wanted to have a conversation and I start it with so? What kind of loser am I?
"So..." came the response I expected.
"Let's start this stupid get to know each other deal then."
"Fine."
"Talkative today aren't we?" I asked dryly. Parkinson smirked but didn't say much.
"Guess not."
"Whatever. So...tell me about your goals after Hogwarts then." I said carefully. I wasn't sure really what went on inside Parkinson's head and she was as unpredictable as the Womping Willow.
"Well after I graduate I planned on going to a Healer academy...but..."
"-but what?"
"I probably won't be able to." Parkinson finished. I was confused.
"Why not? If that's what you want, you should go for it. I thought you had good grades."
"It's not the grades Potter, but then again I guess I can't expect the golden boy of our history to understand something like this." she said glaring at me. Yep, I never knew what she was thinking.
"Well obviously I'm not some golden boy if I don't understand, so explain it to me."
"Hello Potter! My parents are Death Eaters, you really think they're going to let me decide my future? Are you that naïve?"
"I-" I cut myself off, I had almost never been that shocked in my life. To think that the sons and daugters of death eaters would be so controlled had never occured to me.
"I mean, my future was set in stone the day I was born. I can't expect you to understand though, you with...your perfect life and your perfect little friends." Parkinson spat. I frowned, how could she call my life perfect? I'd had nothing but problems!
"Oh please Parkinson, project those fantasies somewhere else, that's stupid." I growled. She rose an eyebrow.
"Give me a break Potter, you think you've had it bad? You're idolized everywhere you go, you have people begging to be your friends. People who worship the ground you walk on, Little children are taught to grow up and be like you! You've never had to deal with parents who work on the side of evil. You've never had to go through that pain. How can you say you know how it is?"
"You think I like it? Having people stalk you, snapping pictures every time you walk down a street? Having every person you meet gawking at some scar on your forehead and whispers following you that 'Hey! That's the boy-who-lived!' or 'Say, isn't that Harry Potter?' everywhere you go? I don't even have parents or anything to get an example from if I wanted to! I have to live with god-forsaken magic-hating muggles who are terrified of me so they lock me in a broom closet all summer long and half the time forbid me from writing my friends let alone do my homework. Then the only father-figure I even had died two years ago at the hands of death eaters. You think that's easy? You think I don't feel pain? Are you delusional?"
"I-" Pansy started but I cut her off.
"Plus those friends don't actually want to be my friends, they just want to brag that they're friends with Harry Potter! They don't want my friendship, they want my fame! Hell, I don't want it, they can have it! They think it's so great, but it just makes me a bigger target for people out to kill me. You think you understand me? Think again, because very few people do." I snarled, I knew I shouldn't have snapped like that on her, she didn't deserve it, but hell, I do know pain. Pansy started glaring at me.
"So you think no one else feels pain? Do you ever think about others Potter? Isn't that what you're known for or is that some other lie by the press? Did those "god-forsaken magic-hating muggles" ever hit you? Did they ever hit to you to the point of non-recognition because you said you didn't want to be like them? Do you have the most evil and feared lord in all of the wizarding world knocking on your door wondering when you're going to join his ranks? Do you get howlers sent to you in the dead of night screaming at you how you're disrespecting your family name and how the second you get home, you'll be locked up without food and water and get beat every day just to have a charm put on you the day before you get back to school so no one notices? Did you have to run away from your own home because your father or mother tried force the Dark Mark onto your arm? Well? Did you?" Pansy hissed, her scowl deepening with each word and her eyes snapping in hatred. "Are you afraid to go home? Are you afraid your own parents pulling the killing curse on you?" she yelled. I sat in shock unable to respond, sure, I didn't have parents to kill me but the Dursley's couldn't do it. I...just didn't know what to say to her. How could I have known what she'd gone through? Sure, I knew lots of people had problems...but to that extent?
"I...I'm sorry." I whispered.
Pansy P.O.V.
His words echoed inside my head, and for some reason I could tell he meant it. Really, I was terrified with myself. Just because I'd snapped in anger because he couldn't understand, I had spilled some of my deepest...darkest innermost secrets and now I was scared. How could I know if he'd tell his stupid Gryffindor friends? I was mentally kicking myself, I hadn't even told that to Draco, and he was the one who came closest to understanding and even feeling some of it some extent. What was I gonna do? Hell, I'd just told Harry Potter! My sworn enemy!
"Seriously, I'm sorry. I didn't know." he said quietly.
"How could you? People never realise there is two sides to a coin. You just live on the happy side so you don't understand the problems of the sad side. It's...human nature I guess...we get caught up so much in our own problems we don't realize other people have their share of them. Hell, I didn't know you even had a godfather let alone that he died."
"Yea...Sirius Black. His sister...Bellatrix killed him in the Department of Mysteries two years ago." he sounded...so pained. "I was there, a few people snuck out of Hogwarts that day and we all...we all witnessed it. Of course, I probably shouldn't tell you this because it'll give Fudge a reason to lock me up into Azkaban now." he muttered.
"That loser of a Minister?" I asked. I remember once being dragged on a trip with my father to visit that blubbering moron. It was sickening the way my father barely lifted his wand and the great Minister of Magic was on his knees groveling for his life and offering everything the ministry had. I frowned.
"Yea. He claims I'm delusional and that the attack from Voldemort on me as a baby has finally gone to my head and that I'm just begging for more fame." he spat scrubbing the trophy he was cleaning a bit...too hard.
"Of course he would, he's in the Death Eaters pockets. He's terrified of them." I said with a shrug. He'd shared something with me, I could do the same I guess. He looked shocked...sort of, like a shock he was expecting. He paused then shrugged.
"Sounds like something he'd do I guess." he muttered.
"Anyway these questions aren't getting us anywhere else. We just end up fighting."
"Right. Next on then, I think we both know about the families now. Mine dead, yours, sucky Death Eaters yes?"
"Right." I said rolling my eyes at his definition.
"Onwards then, friends?"
"What are you talking about? My friends? I don't have any." I replied coldly.
"What? Surely you have...someone!"
"Well Draco is somewhat...well no. He's usually a prat to everyone so yea. He's not one I'd go telling my secrets to. I don't have anyone like that."
"No one." He stated dumbly.
"Nope. You?"
"Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger. I've known Ron since day one at Hogwarts and we've been friends since. I'd do anything him...well really I'd do anything for either of them. I became friends with Hermione after we saved her from that Troll during Halloween first year."
"It was you that batted off Quirrell's beast? Figures."
"You knew about him?"
"Of course, my parents are with the dark lord, I hear just about everything." I said with a shrug.
"Right. Anyway Hermione is great, she nice and understanding, the balance between me and Ron. Though her brain definately helps us out when we're in trouble or when we're stuck with homework." he grinned.
"I guess." I said. I tried to sound as normal as I could...his friends sounded so wonderful, I've always wanted someone like that to confide in and help me when I just need a shoulder to cry on. I'd never had that, even as a baby, I'd been hit if I cried...so I just stopped crying.
"Right then..."
"You know...you never told me your goal."
"Oh. You're right."
"Of course I am." I interrupted with a smirk. He rolled his eyes.
"Whatever. Anyway I plan to become and Auror and put Voldemort down for good, along with all his followers." he said clearly not thinking.
"I guess I should just wait for you to kill my parents off then?" I said, meaning for it to be a joke, but my luck, he didn't catch it that way.
"Oh. I'm so-"
"Shut up Potter I was kidding. I know you just...want what's best for the world right?"
"Contrary to popular belief, no. Voldemort killed my parents, I'm out for revenge. Bellatrix because she killed Sirius, and Lucius Malfoy because he's been a git to me since the day I met him and he's like pretending to be some saint talking about his "error" in his ways. Lastly Peter Pettigrew...because he sold my parents to Voldemort then escaped when I kept Sirius and Remus from killing him in my third year. I'll never forgive him."
"So...who would've thought our golden hero isn't really out for the people, but out for himself?" I said with a smirk. "That sounds much more like a Slytherin than a Gryffindor."
"Would you believe that the sorting hat almost put me there?" he said with a wry grin.
"I might."
"Well it would have if I didn't ask it not to." he said with a shrug.
"Well I had to ask it to." I replied as I recalled the sorting.
Pansy sat onto the stool as Professor McGonagall dropped the hat onto her head. She waited for the voice she was bound to hear.
"Ahh...a Parkinson." it mused in her head.
"What's it to ya?"
"Yes, you've got a Slytherin tongue alright...but...what's this I see inside your head? This...burning desire to defy your family? How you want to prove yourself...that's much more like a Gryffindor wouldn't you say?"
"No! I can't be!" she yelled inside her mind. "I must be Slytherin, my parents will kill me if I'm not! Please..."
"Ahh...but why should I care about your personal problems?"
"If you put me in Gryffindor I swear I'll hunt you down and burn you to nothingness." she snarled in her mind.
"Well I guess you have enough Slytherin in you to threaten me...better be SLYTHERIN!"
"You did?" Harry said with a grin.
"Yup, wanted to put me in Gryffindor but I threated to burn it and it put me in Slytherin like I asked." she said smirking.
"I find that amusing really."
"I do now as well. How...do you plan on fighting the Dark Lord?"
"Well last year a group of students created the D.A. to fight off dark wizards. Other than that, just duel him I guess. Haven't thought about it too much."
"The D.A.?"
"I probably shouldn't be telling you this, Umbridge tried to get me expelled for it and I'm sure you could; but it was a secret organization teaching real Defense Against the Dark Arts instead of writing down notes. I was teaching the class and it was called Dumbledore's Army."
"How didn't I catch wind of this thing?"
"It was really hush hush, we didn't want to get in trouble so...we didn't tell any Slytherins at all, figured you'd turn us in."
"Can't blaim you...we would have."
"Exactly, but now it's not together anymore so you have no proof and it's my word versus yours." he said with a smirk.
"Ha, you're very much like a Slytherin...nice and sneaky." I laughed.
"Really, I can't tell wether that should be a compliment or not."
"Then don't take it either way. Take it as a spur of the moment fluke."
"Whatever."
"Intelligent answer you have there."
"Thank you, I learn from the best of the muggles."
"I'm sure you do."
"Do you have any ideas what Snape and McGonagall are subjecting us to next?"
"No idea, and I think that scares me more than knowing."
A/N: Three cheers for an update!
OO I just realized I forgot to put on the disclaimer for the first 4 chapters! Eeeeee. ANYway, I DON'T own Harry Potter and co.
Review Responses:
The Cheshire Katt - hahahaha you hate cliffhangers...but I love them. :P I didn't think that was much of a cliffie...but if you say so!
Crimson Romance - o.O awesomeful? That's the coolest word EVER. Anyway thankies for the review, I loved it!
gallandro-83 - x.x A I have told countless reviewers, this story is Harry/Pansy BASED. I won't really have other couples so that I don't get off topic. So if you think you see other couples I'm sorry but...I am basing this story on Harry and Pansy. I don't know how else to put it.
forgotmyself - awww, thank you!
mizlovegood - Eeee so glad you do that! I'm the same way when it comes to my favorite stories, so I'm glad you like it that much!
yo yo - beats head into wall X.x it's NOT Hr/Dr people! I keep telling everyone that it's Harry/Pansy focused so there won't BE other couples in the fic. Glad you think it's good though.
CMaca - Yay, I 3 faithful readers. You lot truely make my day, seriously. Well...I know what's in store for them, but you however must wait. :3 hahahaha. Glad you like, I promise to keep updating!
irishdrinkingjig - eep sorry about that! Glad you kept reading though! I promise to update quicker now.
SlytherinDamian - XD awwwwww! Yay! I'm inspiring! I can't believe my fic can persuade you to change your pairing! o.O I must rock. lol j/k. I'm amazed you think my fic is so far the best H/P out there, that's like...a major compliment, thank you. XD Hope you like this chapter as well!
KyrpticMobile - whooo glad you like it! Malfoy torture...sounds like fun. :3 I'll try my best.
Damia - XD Ahh, the things your realize you forgot to add. Whoops! Erm...well I think they were expecting them to be able to hold their own against stuff being 7th years. That and I don't think Snape would care anyway. o.O Meh I'll figure something out to rectify that. XD
shade - XD yaaay glad you think so!
Katsumi-Sanata - ehehe XD pushy aren't you? Right right, I'm working on it.