Chapter 89 - Frequencies
(MPOV)
"I really, really want to know what you guys talk about," Jacobs half grumbled, lounging on the human catwalk in central.
"What, you mean the morning pep-ribbing?" Ironhide snorted.
"Alright," Sideswipe grinned, ready to start the action. "Ratchet, help me translate it."
"That, is a terrible idea," I chuckled immediately as Ratchet snorted back his own guffaw.
"Why?" Epps asked with a grin.
"Because Sideswipe is a predator, and Ratchet is a medic," I laughed.
"Which means you have to translate it," Ratchet smirked down at me as I casually walked to lean against my spark-father's leg.
"That's an even worse idea," Bumblebee piped up cheerfully.
"Why?" Epps looked at Bee curiously.
"Because my big sister actually knows what it means, she's both." Bumblebee smirked.
"Bee-ee!" Jacobs called out in a mockingly whining voice.
"It's a language thing," Bumblebee laughed, "every caste has it's own frequency, and they're separated according to compatibility."
"The ultimate simplification is that on one end of the scale are the uber killers," I grinned, "On the other side are the healers. One works for death, one works against."
"So the speed that I say Good... good..." Sideswipe stated blandly.
"Means a shit ton of work for me to clean up the mess he made of everyone else," Ratchet grumbled. "I'd roughly translate it to massacre."
The soldiers stared back and forth between the mechs.
"How do you keep it straight?" Jacobs asked in an awed voice.
"We speak common," Bee shrugged with a grin, "the amalgam of all the frequencies."
"Otherwise none of us would have a single scrapping idea of what Bee says," Ironhide added with a snort, giving the scout a light shove as I laughed. "It's one thing to respect tradition, it's entirely another to make your primary language scout." The weapons specialist settled onto a bench with a contented groan and nodded to Will as he swung down to sit on his shoulder.
"What's your primary language?" Epps asked curiously, looking up at Bee.
"Scout," Bee announced proudly, "=Spoken-at-high-speed-for-short-burst-communications-over-long-distances. Top-that.="
"What'd you say?" Chance asked curiously, "It sounded like what, two words?" he looked at Ratchet. The mech shrugged.
"Bee's showing off," I giggled, I couldn't help it. "He said 'spoken at high speed for short burst communications over long distances. Top that'."
"Holy crap!" Jacobs laughed.
"If you think that's bad, wait until you get Prime in on the conversation," Ironhide snorted as Optimus strode in.
ΩShould I be worried, my beloved Archangel?Ω Optimus rumbled placidly as Ironhide jumped.
"No my beloved Optimus," I smiled up at my guardian, "Oh crap, I said that in english didn't I?" I frowned slightly.
"Getting backlogged again?" Ratchet snorted.
"Oi! You try switching though six frequencies in the space of five minutes with only one processor running!" I shot back at him with a grin.
"No see if I did that, I'd be swearing, not laughing," Ratchet grumbled.
"Is that why you're always grumbling?" Ironhide asked innocently, "We could always stick with english for you, old-timer."
"What, and let the humans know just how many times you can insult someone in the space of thirty seconds? We'll be shooed off planet before you can draw your cannons!" Ratchet shot back at the bot.
I grinned and lightly took my place on Optimus' shoulder.
"So am I allowed to ask how the hell that works?" Epps called up to me with a laugh.
"How what works?" Optimus rumbled curiously.
"How you two..." Epps frowned and began gesturing vaguely.
"How they interface?" Ironhide snorted, "well do we have to explain the birds and the bees? or-"
"Leave me out of that one!" Bumblebee called out with a broad grin.
"It's the size thing that's got me," Jacobs rumbled with a snort.
"That's the easy part," Chromia piped up gleefully as she leaned against Ironhide. "She's small enough to fit inside his spark-chamber, their sparks can merge without them accidentally becoming misaligned."
"It's getting them apart again that's difficult," Ratchet added with a snort.
"Can you blame the bot?" Arcee asked in an innocent voice.
"Yeah I can," Ironhide rumbled gleefully, "he's the first pick for a first guide, he knows damn well how to keep himself from getting tangled up!"
"It's the cables, gotta be, it's just not a good idea to have more than eighteen," Sideswipe added with a broad grin.
"Wait what?" Will asked with wide eyes. Optimus glanced at me.
ΩShall we?Ω he asked mildly.
ΩAfter you, beloved,Ω I stated with a grin.
"Oi! That's cheating!" Sideswipe called out with a laugh.
"What is?" Will grinned.
"Speaking the language of the Primes," Ratchet snorted, "the rest of us can't even come close to comprehending what they're saying."
"But she sounds so erotic when she's speaking it," my Optimus rumbled placidly.
"Shame, Optimus," Ironhide snorted. "That's taking kink to an entirely different frequency."
"Share!" Chromia demanded in counterpart.
"How do I translate it?" I murmured with a small smile.
(OPOV)
"Take your time," Optimus rumbled, letting a broad grin cross his face, "you are young, we do not mind."
"Oh you're playing that card are you?" Mikaela shot back at him, her grin spread to reach her eyes.
"It is the burden of the elders to have patience," Optimus rumbled placidly.
"Decrepit," Kae shot at him.
"Hatchling," he rumbled back immediately.
"You weren't saying that last night," she drawled, her voice dropping to a sultry level.
"That is true, but then the only thing you were screaming last night was my name," Optimus rumbled with a deep, smug smirk as the humans howled.
"Which I am most certainly going to get you back for," Kae purred.
"Promise?" Optimus parroted her response.
"Aw yeah, he's back," Ratchet grinned.
"All is right with the world when Prime's getting laid," Bumblebee added cheerfully.
"Video Femme!" Arcee demanded with a broad grin.
"You know the rules," Mikaela shot back at her with her own grin.
"What rules?" Will called out.
"You want the video from a bot's room, you cough up the video from your own," Ironhide rumbled with a broad grin.
There was silence for a moment.
"That's fair," Jacobs nodded.
"Alright, we have work to do," Optimus rumbled calmly, watching his unit with a smile.
"What are your orders Captain?" Bumblebee played the soundbyte cheerfully.
"You have been waiting two months to play that clip, haven't you" Optimus rumbled with a snort, looking at his scout.
"More fun this way," Bee grinned.
"Alright, Bumblebee, Sideswipe, you have patrol today, please do not destroy anything or get pulled over for speeding tickets – no, no high-speed chases either."
"Aaww," Bee grinned.
"Jolt."
"Communications!" the bot called out with a small smile.
"Ratchet."
"Same thing we do everyday," Ratchet snorted, "'Mon Kae, we've got a new shipload, courtesy of that guy you found."
"Clutches," Mikaela snorted, casually walking down Optimus' arm onto Ratchet's shoulder.
"Ironhide, you and the femmes are on training duty."
"Right, c'mon you lot, simulator day," Ironhide rumbled with a broad grin, he looked at the femmes.
"Let's get some size going, shall we?" Arcee called out with a grin, Chromia and Flare promptly began cheering, whizzing to their dominant sister.
"Now," Arcee stated calmly. Binder cables stretched limb to torso as they combined into one unit.
"Now that's just cool," Will stated with a grin as Ironhide rose with the human still lounging on his shoulder.
"You should see them in action like that," 'Hide snorted, "gorgeous, deadly creatures."
"Amen!" Mikaela called out, cheerfully clinging to Ratchet as the mech rose and headed for the Med bay.
Optimus watched his unit cheerfully heading for their duties before rising and following the technician to communications. The first few hours of his day were calm, peaceful, dealing with calls from the various military commanders whom more often than not treated him with respect.
However, just past the human's first duty-shift rotation, General Moreshower was striding toward him with a desperate look in his eyes. Galloway gleefully following behind.
"General, Director," Optimus rumbled calmly.
Galloway shoved his way forward, climbed up the communications central catwalks, and began ranting again. Optimus glanced at the General again, the man standing with a disturbing expression on his face beside one of the enclaves of human technicians before turning his attention to the ranting Director.
::. Kae, could you come to communications?.:: he sent over the primary, hoping she had her iPod in one ear.
::. I'll get her.:: Ratchet sent back immediately, a moment later Kae's voice was added.
::. What's wrong?.:: she asked immediately.
::. Director Galloway is ranting, but General Moreshower seems upset.::
::. I'm on my way.:: she stated instantly, and minutes later she strode in through the door, Galloway never even noticing.
"General? Are you alright?" Kae asked softly.
"Mikaela!" he jumped, looking at her in shock, glancing up toward Galloway. "I don't suppose there's any possibility of announcing to that idiot that you're engaged to marry Prime there or something?" he murmured softly, "I'm almost certain he'll resign if you out-smart him again..."
Mikaela glanced up at Optimus with a twinkle in her eyes, Optimus noted that she was still wearing his ring, he gave the appearance of being focused entirely on Director Galloway again.
::. Shall we?.:: Mikaela sent silently.
::. Please?.:: Optimus murmured gleefully. Chris Moreshower looked at Mikaela as she kept her eyes on Optimus, touching her iPod with one earbud still in. She glanced at him and offered him the twin.
The brilliant, beautiful Femme.
::. Good afternoon General.:: Optimus sent to the iPod with a snort. ::. Just murmur, I can hear you just fine, I might note you have yet to congratulate my ambassador, she is engaged.::
"You're what!?" General Moreshower shouted, startling Galloway out of his rant.
"Engaged," Mikaela smiled shyly, offering her left hand.
"Congratulations!" Chris shouted, grabbing the Femme's hand and dragging her into a hug while Epps, Lennox and Jacobs all hid laughing grins behind yawns, coughs and a sneeze. "Who's the lucky bastard that snared you!?"
(WPOV)
"Oh so we're finally going to be rid of you then," Galloway sneered. Will buried his face into a hand. The man truly had no idea whatsoever. Idiot.
"I will thank you to be more civil to my fiancee," Optimus rumbled sternly, turning to glare at Galloway. The man paled. "She has shown you nothing but courtesy despite your continually far fetched and uncouth accusations, and has done a great deal to aid you in keeping your position as the liaison between myself and your President."
"Why the hell would you agree to marry a bloody machine!?" Galloway practically shrieked, opting to ignore Optimus altogether and fairly running down the catwalks to get into Mikaela's face.
"Whoa! Bad move!" Will shouted. Too late.
"Are you some kind of freak, or a complete idiot!?" Galloway bellowed, standing toe to toe with Mikaela. The only part of her that moved was an eyebrow. Will couldn't decide if he wanted to watch or look away before seeing the human get squashed by the girl's rather overprotective fiancee.
"Judging by the prime specimen of humanity that you believe yourself to be," she began calmly, "I chose the better man. I might remind you, Director Galloway, that you are the only person in this room that has not been trained to kill on some level, so I would suggest that you choose your next words wisely."
"How do you intend to consummate your wedding then?" Galloway sneered at her. "I know, you're going to impale yourself on his stick-shift and-"
"Can I slap him yet?" Mikaela interrupted mildly, turning to look at Moreshower curiously.
"I think you'd better, or I am," the General growled.
"That would be your second warning," Mikaela added patiently. Optimus glared down at the Director, and Will couldn't help but admire the sheer restraint that had to take.
Personally, he wanted to just shoot the idiot and be done with it.
Galloway was red in the face, snarling. He reached toward Mikaela's throat, and Will had his hand on his gun the next second.
Pointlessly of course, the next moment, Galloway was on his knees with Mikaela gripping his hand ruthlessly.
"Hands to yourself, Galloway," she snarled softly. "The Auto-bots have been designated as citizens, people, Director, and there is absolutely no law declaring that two people cannot be wed. My father gave his blessing before he passed, and you will not interfere with us."
"Let me go!" Galloway shrieked, "this is assault on a Director! I'll have your head for this!" the man stood up and began retreating toward the entrance bay, ranting the entire way.
Finally, finally communications central stood in silence.
"Well, that went well," Mikaela lilted cheerfully, walking over to sit in the hand Optimus offered. The mech deposited her lightly on his shoulder.
"Well now what?" Moreshower called up with a groan.
Mikaela smiled.
"The only precedent we have for sentient inter-species unions are borne by hollywood." she laughed. "Although I might note that Spock was half human, the son of an ambassador come to think of it. And rather popular among that generation."
Every last human in the Communications room stared at her.
She had pure innocence plastered on her face again.
Will burst out laughing.
"Damn she's good," Moreshower snorted, he looked up at Optimus. "Congratulations on snaring the Angel, Prime, I do have a few things to discuss with you, if you don't mind."
"Not at all, General," Optimus rumbled patiently, "Shall I come down, or would you care to join us up here?"
Will grinned as the General laughed, ascending the catwalk and leaning comfortably on the railing.
"Unfortunately I'm supposed to ask if you're ready to upgrade our weapons technology yet," the general shrugged. "But judging by that scowl you can't keep off of your face I'm going to ask instead that we skip the inevitable reaming out and get down to the actual business."
Optimus watched the General warily for a moment.
"Hey, I already know your answer is no," Chris Moreshower snorted. "I'm just advising you that I'm supposed to ask, so if you don't mind, I'd like to say that I asked and got the usual answer. Saves time."
Optimus snorted and glanced at his Kae.
"And if the wording isn't enough for the reports, we can always lie a bit later," she smiled at him.
"And then you advise us that lying is wrong while we are writing reports," he told her calmly, raising a brow ridge.
"White lies," General Moreshower grinned. "So can I write in my report that you reamed me out, again, about futilely asking about weapons technology?"
"That should be safe, yes," Optimus nodded, chuckling.
"Right then, down to the actual business," Moreshower grinned.
"I'll leave you to it," Mikaela stated in amusement, standing on Optimus' shoulder and pressing a gentle kiss to his jaw.
"I am made desolate in your absence," Optimus rumbled softly.
"You know where I live," Mikaela stated in amusement.
"True," Optimus rumbled, nodding and so obviously desperately trying to keep the smirk off of his face.
It was frankly adorable.
He turned and gently deposited his Kae on the ground before facing the General again.
There was silence for a moment.
"I'm sorry," Chris stated quietly.
"For?" Optimus prompted him calmly.
"I seem to have gotten you engaged to a fleshling," Moreshower stated quietly.
Will bit back a snort of laughter, almost impossible while staring into Optimus' patented, benignly calm expression.
"But you have gotten me engaged to one of the most beautiful of your people," Optimus rumbled contentedly. "I fear that I may need now apologize for taking her from the list of court-able females to your race..."