Title: Ordered Lives (Formerly posted as "He Came Back")
Author: meroe
Pairings: EdWin
Disclaimer: I don't own it. I don't even do it justice.
A/N: I redid Prologue and Reunion. I even renamed the story and the chapters (Yay! I told you I can't come up with something at that time). To those who read this before, please read again. . I hope I made it better. My apologies, La Dame du Lac. I'll make up for it.
Ordered Lives
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"Take care of it."
Al carefully put down the receiver, his face passive. For a while, he kept sitting in the high chair in the bar counter, chin resting on his hand. He paid the bill. Sometimes, we have to play the older brother. This was one of those times, his brother just went crazed.
But he did not blame him, if at all, he kind of blamed himself. He should have seen this happening; he was the one who out of sheer concern for Ed's emotional health convinced his brother to devote another three hard years to find a way back, unaided by wild inventions and cranked up societies.
But until Ed told him, he never thought of Winry marrying that early a possibility. His brother met him at Central, after calling him to invent some stupid excuse that the military wanted him on the double. They proceeded to rent a hotel room, and the rest of the night was worn away in a bar. Only after considerably halving the bottle of Whisky did his brother began to speak.
Quite honestly, he seemed to have been drinking since he was on the train. Al hoped he would stop, he could never take too much alcohol or his body would tolerate it. No one of Al's capacity wanted a brother turning into a drunkard waste.
Not that he didn't know what happened. When Edward called, his voice was rather detached, much like the same cool voice he mastered to adopt whenever he was hurt. That moment, he knew something went wrong.
Al drank with him patiently, as Ed had drank with him back when he had some woman problem in Munich. As he sat watching his brother drink his spirit away, he pondered reflectively. They mustn't stop now. The situation wasn't as bad as you first make it to be.
Or rather, they couldn't stop now. Even at this time of their lives, they were still wandering to find their lost home. The Elric brothers never stopped on their journey because they stubbornly insisted they had nowhere to come back. Just when they finally accepted the home left in Resembool, it stopped waiting for their return.
"Al, let's go," came his brother's drunken drawl. He looked at Ed and continued his drink. He slumped in his chair, idly fiddling his cup with his fingers.
"Brother, it wasn't as bad as you think."
Edward snorted.
"Somewhere along —"
"She was married. Had kid," he snorted. "Nice platter," he remarked as he shifted his attention to the workmanship of the platter that held their appetizer.
"Don't give up so easily—"
"It's fine."
"The line —"
"There was no line.
"Shut up brother!" Al rose from his seat, then checked himself. His brother looked at him lazily, not quite comprehending his anger. He fiddled his cup some more, drank its imaginary contents while Al refilled it for him. He smiled wearily. Al looked at him. For the moment, he could do nothing but let his brother numb his system down. He can get pretty intense, and when he was intense, he often went the wrong way. He knew the basic routine, go to a pub, drink some, talk some, force some direction to his increasingly directionless drive. It had been the trend since he started gaining height. That should have been a cause for celebration. But his dream of getting taller only brought the issue of his automail arm and hand, and automail lead to nothing but their frustrated recollections of a blissful home.
"So unlike you," Al gulped his last drink and shot his brother a challenging smile. No, he thought. He won't tell his brother about that urgent call just yet. "Giving up, that is.
Ed managed a broken smile. "Let me be," the formerly intense fullmetal answered. "Her words…hurt…here," he drawled lazily while making a vague motion to his chest.
Al considered him for a moment. No, he's had enough, he justified.
----
Meanwhile, Winry covered her dear daughter to sleep. How dare he show up this late, she smiled to herself. She didn't quite know what she felt. Their meeting was very civil. She didn't know what to do, she never expected him to return. But he was very civil about it, civil to a degree that it was quite impersonal, it hurt. It was not as if she no longer had any feelings for him. But she long ago placed the last image of the Elric brothers in a special place in her heart and locked it, she wanted to keep that image safe and taint-free.
"Mommy," Trisha moved to face her side.
"Hmmm?"
"Is he the famous Full Metel Alcwemst you and daddy told me about?"
She laughed. "Alchemist," she slowly repeated Trisha's words. The child blushed. "Yes, he is."
"Where had he been all this time?"
Winry felt shock. She mentally kicked herself and closed her mouth. It was an innocent question. Maybe Trisha wondered why that golden-haired man suddenly came to the picture when his daddy who used to talk about him was long gone.
Yes, her daddy was already gone.
----
"You see, I was living with Winry ever since we last met," Rosé casually told the story while Edward stood beside her, staring at the grave marker that was for Pinako Rokbell. "So many things happened, believe me. She told me she was going to Central. When she came back, she was happy and sad, I don't know at that time. She told me you came back, but something horrible happened, and you and Al had disappeared together for good. That was what the military said." The woman made a defeated sound. Ed did not appear moved at all.
Rosé looked at him and then at the grave marker he had been blindly staring at. "Don't worry, the shock will wear through," Ed shot up an eyebrow and looked at her. She smiled. "Yes, right? We're both adults now, there's no need to be ashamed. Honestly, it was quite naïve for you to not expect a scene like this," she continued with her gentle voice. Edward smiled. "Yeah, I guess so."
"It's just we were used to Winry just being Winry and being patient with us. We didn't realize we made an impression that we would never come back." He added light-heartedly. They started walking home.
"Everybody loved you both," she unexpectedly said as they made their way back.He looked surprised. "When the two of you disappeared, many invested on the fanciful idea of you two coming back. She did, but she was more resigned. You see, life goes on. After two years, Winry decided to move on. She was so vulnerable at that time — Edward inwardly cringed— it was a good thing that she fell in love again."
They began to descend the hill. Already, they can make out the sunny yellow house with two children playing on its front yard. "Shemet himthree years ago. Mark was a good man. It was unfortunate he died."
Unfortunate? Edward thought. It was luck— he checked himself. Even so, it must have been painful. Death always was. The sense of calamity that awaits us after our loved one has departed, that is. It was selfish, but in death we cry only for ourselves. Because we knew it's us who lost something, the other rested in peace. "How did he die?"
"He was a soldier." A soldier? he felt his blood rushing. "He died in action."
He was saved from the burden of reacting when they heard Ken, Rose's son, calling out. "Ah! Auntie Rosé!" Trisha came running to their direction, holding a broken toy train in her hand. Rosé bent and hugged the two kids.
"Hello sir," Ken smiled to them. "Edward Elric. Call me Ed." He grinned and shook the boy's hand. Ken smiled wide.
"Ano, auntie, I broke Ken's train. Can you fix it?"
"Oh, why don't you ask Mr. Elric over here? He was such a good alchemist of his time."
"Don't talk in past tense," Ed commanded. Rosé laughed.
"Uhm, Mr. Edward," Trisha looked at him hopefully and extended her hand which held the broken toy. "Heheh," Edward was about to alchemize it when a thought ran through his head. Instead, he procured some glue and fixed the tire the way he remembered his sensei had done before.
A look of pure adoration enveloped her face, and she suddenly hugged the little of Ed that she could grab. He fell back to the ground surprised. Rosé smiled as Ed awkwardly patted her head. "You see," Rosé began. "Trisha grew up with stories about you. Her parents fed her with it."
Just then, Winry came out of the house. She looked at Ed waving his arms at her. She managed a smile, much like her old faked smile and motioned the party to come inside the house for lunch.
----
"You know you can't send me away." Edward said with full conviction in his voice. This conversation had gone off absurdly and he was having, as usual, a hard time in keeping his emotions in check.
He should never have had the idea to talk with her after lunch.
"This conversation was long overdue," Winry said, trying to keep her voice even. "But I wish you realizeour situation now." His nerve, her wounded pride, a rather large portion of her that had been buried with her faith in Edward Elric, Mark Rother and love, shouted. She decided to say it out; she had enough torture repeating the questions for two years, then some.
"Walking out, waltzing in," she murmured.
"What? Ed looked at her, sitting defiantly before a cup of tea that could break in her grip. She was looking straight at him, and he was taken aback.
"Your nerve, acting as if nothing happened," she continued in a seething tone.
"What? Winry…"
She abruptly stood up; he went after her and grabbed her by the hand.
"LET GO OF ME EDWARD ELRIC!" Stunned, he let her hand drop and raise his arms in a form of surrender.
"Okay, ...calm down..." Winry never lost her cool this way, it was much better with the wrench.
"Winry," he began but felt the words stuck on his throat. His body went rigid at the sight of her tears, unabashedly flowing. What had he done.
She clenched her fists. This wasn't how their reunion should turn out. He was supposed to come back after three, four years, not seven. He was supposed to confess undying love, or missing her, whatever was sweet, and together they would be happy. They would marry and have children of their own. Not this way, when she already has Trisha. Did he know how many years it took her to concentrate her mind and put some order to what was left of her life when they 'heroically' disappeared?
It was bullshit.
There goes the frustration of seven years of believing all was over, and having your dream come true when you no longer want it to be. There goes three years of obsession and blindly staking everything with luck. The pain, misunderstanding and unrealized words made the distance farther than what he felt the night he stood with Ms. Winry Fulbright. She loved him too much she did not leave anything for herself. It was painful. At that moment, years of torturing herself with enduring memories, the pain of a love so greatly given that was never returned, it all went back to her that for a moment, she wished nothing but to inflict on him the same pain. The faint thought of him never appreciating her back then lingered. And maybe, by feeling what she was able to endure, he would begin to appreciate her strength.
She struggled for the right words. This time not to soothe, but to utterly crush him the way she remembered she was.
Finally, she raised her head. The look in her eyes told him something was coming. He only had enough time to warn himself.
"I wish you never came back, Edward."
It worked. The words hit home. She secretly relished as she saw the look of pain, no, horror, dilate his eyes.
When it was completely dark, he looked up. In the table, her wrench lay forgotten. God, how he hated that despicable contraption. But after all the words were spilled, he knew how much he yearned for it. At least, something other than his heart would hurt.
A/N: WOot.So what happens next? Will Ed just bash himself senseless? Or will Winry just, well I don't know what Winry plans to do. This chapter is dedicated to:
ChibiRaccoon — I'm so sorry (smiles sweetly) it took time. I was reconsidering the pace and how the story should progress, stuff, so sorry . I'm so happy you liked it, really your review made me going! I owe it to you I finished this chapter, so it's especially dedicated! I hope you like it (hugs). Please tell me what you think about the pace and stuff. Thanks! (hugs again)
Loki-The-Chocobo — No prob. Reviews keep me going, so everything dedicated to reviewers. . Anyways, I hoped you liked how it turned out (sweatdrops). No worries, (I worry about the pace though) but the story's far from over! Keep reading! XD
Fullmetalwinry — Thanks for the review! As promised, here's chapter two. I hope you like it!
La Dame du Lac — AWw, thanks soo much! I, erm, just hope you'll forgive me for revising the first two chapters . Please reread it. Tell me if it still works. I hope I made it better.
Shir0-ChaN — I got Ed IC! Yay, I got Ed IC! I was kinda worried they'll turn out OOC. Please tell me if they do. . Anyway, I sympathize. Yep, that knowledge was our (EdWin fans) only consolation from the movie.
LonelyLord, and
heathkin. Thanks!
Anyway, don't lose hope yet! Yep, Edward is so hating his life right now (I just love torturing our little bishie) . But keep on reading. I'm an EdWin fan, so some stuff's bound to happen. Thanks so much for the support, shiro-chan!
If you guys wanna suggest any ideas on what you think must happen, the floor's open. Or if you wish something to happen, review and I might consider it. ..Thanks to the readers and please keep on REVIEWING! That's if you wanna know what Al's gonna do with that call and how Winry will react to Ed…