"Natalie Honey, are you alright?" Nick said as he stood up and pulled Natalie up off the floor.
"I'm fine" Natalie said red in the face and she wiped herself off.
"Are you sure Natty, that looked like a nasty fall?" John asked
"Yes, I'm sure!" she got mad and told John she looked at Nick, and then she looked back to John.
"What are you doing here John?" Natalie asked as she tried not to stare at him for to long, she looked away briefly and then looked at nick before refocusing her attention on john and his answer.
"I live here again. Got my old job back to, so I guess you'd say I've come home" John told her as Natalie looked at John a little longer than she should have and Nick looked between the two, before focusing his attention on John.
"That's right, I remember you, John Mcbain right? You were my boss for a few days before you got fired" Nick said as he leaned his hand out to shake John's.
"It's nice to see you again" Nick added as the two men shook hands.
"You too, It was Ned right?" John said, as he knew what his name really was.
"Nick, his name is Nick" Natalie told John as she caught on to what he was doing, the game he was playing. He was purposely trying to catch her off guard, purposely trying to make her feel uncomfortable.
"So john, what brings you back to Llanview?" Nick said standing next to Natalie putting his arm across her shoulders pulling her a little bit closer to him.
"I've always loved it here, but the real reason is I have some unfinished business here" John said as he wasn't trying to hide the fact that he couldn't and wouldn't get his eye's off of Natalie. Nick was no dummy he knew John and Nat had a thing before he came into the picture and it was obvious by the way John was looking at her he still had a thing for her.
"Well that's great, have you heard our great news? Natalie is giving me the great pleasure of marrying me on Saturday. Maybe if you're not busy you'd like to come to the wedding? " Nick told John. Nick was just making John aware if he didn't already know that she was off limits and he invited him to the wedding almost as if rubbing his nose in it.
"Yeah, I heard that somewhere, congratulations, I'd love to come to the wedding and see you two get married, thank you. Maybe it'll even last a little longer than Natty's other marriages." John said being a smart ass and looking at Natalie while he said it. Nick was about to open up his mouth and say something when his cell phone rang. he excused himself and took the call a few feet away from them. Natalie walked a little bit closer to John and spoke softly to him.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Natalie said with her back to Nick as she leaned in a little closer to John.
"What are you talking about Nat, I came up here for some air" John replied as he turned slightly and saw Nick watching them as he took his phone call.
"Bull shit! Why'd you come back to Llanview now all of a sudden." Natalie said not to loud still leaning into John.
" Like I told your boy wonder I have unfinished business here" John said as he caught her eyes and he stared straight into them.
"And what business might that be?" Natalie said after turning her body to see Nick staring at their backs.
"You" John said as he leaned in really close to her ear so she could feel his breath on her neck. Natalie closed her eyes, he was so near, and she could feel him. She opened up her eyes when John backed up because he heard Nick approaching them.
"I'm sorry babe but I gotta go, that was Bo, he needs some help with a case tonight" Nick said as he leaned in and kissed her
"Will you be alright getting home without me? " Nick asked as he pulled her body close to his with his arms, Natalie nodded.
"Good, I'll see ya when I get home and we'll finish what we started here on the roof" He said and then he gave her one more long lingering kiss mostly for John's benefit .He told John he looked forward to seeing him at work and the wedding and then Nick left. After Nick was completely gone john turned to Natalie.
"I can't believe you like all that babe and honey crap" John told her making a weird face.
"I won't let you ruin this for me john, not now, Nick's a great guy and I'm marrying him on Saturday and he's everything I could have hoped for." Natalie said as she watched John slowly move closer to her.
" But he's not me " John told her as they stared into each other's eye's. Natalie stayed silent for a few minutes before she spoke.
"Yeah, you're right he's not you, he has no demons, no baggage, no problem telling me he loves me, If I walk away he follows, he's a great guy" Natalie said as John continued to get closer to her, closer to her on the roof, their roof, the place where they made love for the first time.
"Yeah, you said that" John told her as he got real close and he stared into her glassy eyes, he leaned in with a soft kiss. Natalie responded to his kiss at first because of the way it made her feel, the way it always made her feel. But then she pushed him away from her.
"I won't let you, I won't let you walk back into my life and ruin this for me, I won't!" she said and she left the roof.
Later that night Natalie laid awake on her side of his bed and she had been trying to sleep for hours. All she could think about was John, he was back and for a minute there on the roof she was excited by that fact, the fact that he was back in Llanview. She asked him why he was back and he said because of her. He was playing games again, playing with her heart, he always did this, he couldn't tell her how he felt about her, that he loved her but he didn't want anyone else to either. Typical John McBain stuff. Can't love me, won't even try, feels I'm too good for him, but doesn't like the fact that I'm with someone else. He comes across as if he might take action, might try, might fight, but when push comes to shove he can't it's just not in him. I won't give in to him, not this time, not when I have a terrific guy wanting to marry me and that loves me. She told herself. I won't be stupid and fall for John and let him string me along for the rest of my life it ends now. Right here, right now.
She thought some more about John and how she could possibly have spent the rest of her life waiting for him, and for him to use those three words that he seem to be so hung up over. She shook her head as it lay on her pillow. No, she again told herself, I won't fall back into John's trap, I won't play that game again, and I most certainly won't continue our dance that has lasted almost three years. She rolled over in bed and looked at a sleeping Nick. She would have so much better of a life with him than waiting for something that might never happen. She kissed his cheek while he slept and she laid her head on his chest and again tried to get some sleep.
John couldn't sleep so he took a walk thru the park, it was really late but he didn't care. He walked thru the square thinking about her, he saw them together tonight for the first time and it really bothered him, nothing had bothered him as much as this except when Chris came home from prison and he lost her for good. She had a hard time forgiving him then, but she did end up forgiving him. She had resisted it but she slowly forgave him, she divorced Chris and had wanted to try but he wasn't responsive, he was afraid he'd again hurt her and he couldn't do that to her again, he couldn't do that to himself again. He couldn't go thru the pain he felt every time she was in pain, and then to know he was the one causing the pain. She once said she didn't need words from him to know how he felt about her but he thought it was time, time to try and say those words, say them to her.
He would never say something he didn't mean but his time both his heart and brain knew it was time, time to actually tell her the words, the truth. The only thing was, he was running out of time and he wasn't sure how to do it. How do you just say I love you to someone you've loved for so long in passing. How would he find the right time to tell her over the next two days before her wedding day? He stopped and looked at the bench they once sat at and said goodbye on. He knew he just had to do it, if he didn't it might be something he never recovered from, a regret he would live with that might paralyze his whole being. He thought about tonight and he got his answer about her still loving him, he saw it when she stared into his eyes, when she didn't pull out of his kiss, how she got so mad at him. She still loved him, just as much as she did six months ago, he was just hoping it wasn't impossible for them to get over all the bad stuff. He pulled his necklace out of his shirt, the St. Jude medal she bought him for Christmas, he rubbed it with his fingers for luck, and it's time I make the impossible possible.
The next two days had gone by so quickly and it was now the night before her wedding. Tomorrow she would be getting married, tonight was his last chance, his last chance to make her realize she could never be happy with Nick, with anyone else because she loved him, and he loved her. He had been trying to get time alone with her over the past two days but she was always with someone else, with Nick, Jessica, Vicky, even Roxy and if he asked to speak with her alone she wouldn't talk to him, she would barely even acknowledge he was around. It had to be tonight; tonight was his last chance, he thought as he walked thru the square heading for her rehearsal dinner at Rodi's. He had over heard a few of the officers talking about it at the station today when he had stopped by to see Bo. He didn't care if it was a rehearsal for her wedding, and that all her family would be there. He would tell her in a room full of people if he had to, he just needed for her to know , to know and then she could make her own choice if she wanted to marry Nick or be with him, but a choice for her to make after she knew the truth, after she heard the words from him.
John walked into Rodi's and a lump formed in his throat as he saw her, as he looked at her and saw how beautiful she looked, the party had already started and she was talking to Jessica and feeling Jessica's belly, probably trying to feel the baby kick or something he thought, he walked over by the Jukebox and saw Michael standing there.
"Hey bro, what's going on? Why you here?" John asked Michael
"Could ask you the same thing but I already know the answer. I hope you aren't going to do anything crazy tonight" Michael asked John as John saw Natalie walk over to Nick and give him a hug. This is going to be hard he thought, but I'm going to tell her tonight. He watched Nick escort Natalie to the dance area and he heard that one of Natalie's favorite songs was playing on the jukebox. John was completely ignoring Michael at this point and he walked a little closer to the happy looking couple.
"John, John I was talking to you, no John, don't. Just leave it alone," Michael said as he saw John walk right next to the slow dancing couple and tap Nick on the shoulder.
"May I cut in?" John asked Nick as Natalie shot John a look of annoyance. John didn't wait for an answer from Nick and he grabbed Natalie's hand out of his grip and glided her a few feet away. Nick just smiled not wanting to make a scene and walked over by the bar brooding inside while covering with a smile.
" What do you think you are doing John?" Natalie said with her own phony smile planted on her face.
" I need to talk to you and this is the only way I could think of getting you alone" John said looking over to see Nick's face start to become angry looking.
"Alone, there's like thirty people here" Natalie said with a small chuckle
"Yeah, but we're the only two dancing. Hey remember when I closed this place for us?" he said smiling
"Yeah" she said softening with a slight glimmer in her eye.
"That was fun wasn't it? We did have a lot of good times didn't we?" John asked as he continued to move her slowly around the dance area.
"We did, that we did" Natalie said looking into his eye's getting lost in those blue eyes of his. She had even forgotten all about nick for a moment or two.
"John why are you really here tonight?" Natalie said as the music started to come to the end of the song.
"Natalie, I love you" John said loudly as the music had stopped and everyone heard his declaration of love, including Nick.