Author: It seems like infinity before I get a chance to use the computer! I know there is a grammar mistake or two in the sentance previous but I don't care all that much.
Axl: Yay! Story!
X and Zero: (apatheticaly) Huzzahhhhhh!
Author: My mom says that I should start writing my story already so lets cut right to the nitty-gritty!
Prjct. WAR: Simple, but elegant review. Bravo.
Archaon: How true, how true. Yes, the thing with Lifesaver and the donkey is quite interesting but unfortunately, I couldn't really fit that into the story but I really want to!
Wait... Only two reviews? Oh well, I'll take that as a sign to update more often!
Robb: Heh heh, I get a bigger role now!
Dynamo: (not even in the story) Shut up.
The day following the last chapter was the day that they were going to say it. The thing. Yes, the thing. You know, about X and Zero switched bodies? Yes, forget about the thing I said about that they didn't really switch bodies, but that instead the AlterMan's ability transformed their bodies to match each other. The only reason I said that was a poor excuse to make sense stating that AlterMan's only ability was to change things but in the world of fanfictions, if reploids could give birth and eat, than they sure as heck can switch bodies.
Anyway, X and Zero were wondering how they were going to pull this off. Axl was playing the Lockeman X collection. On his GameSphere. "What if we were to slip it in during regular conversation?" X said while scribbling down some conversation-starters on a note pad.
"I could imagine it now. 'So how's the wife and kids? Great, and oh, before you leave, I'm not really X. Have a good time playing golf! Bye!' I think not." Zero was a bit tired of X's suggestions.
X stopped scribbling, and in that silence, he sighed, ripped out the paper, balled it up and threw it away. "Well we have to come up with something."
And the sound of the door knob stopped everything that Axl, Zero and X were doing, thinking, or saying. (Consequently, this caused Axl to lose his game) When the person at the door found that the door was locked, the door came bursting down and Alia was crying waterfalls. Literally. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
"Alia, calm down! What happened!" X said as Alia hugged Zero for comfort.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
"What happened!"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH?"
"I said WHAT HAPPENED?" X yelled over Alia sobbing, but it was too for Zero was covered in gooey, green snot! Alia still teary eyed turned to face X.
"Douglas, he-he-"
"Yes?"
"He-he-he-"
"Yessss?"
"He-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-"
"Oh this is going to take forever!" Zero grabbed a handful of the snot and rubbed some on Alia's face. And then a WTF expression went on Alia's face but then a friggin' miracle happened because Alia managed to finish her sentance and Zero didn't beat up!
"DOUGLAS ATE FLUFFYYYYYYYYYY! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" The waterfalls came back Alia cried again.
(Two months ago)
Douglas was starving himself to see if the consequences of not eating was the same for reploids as it was for humans. And yes, it was.
"SOOOOOOOO HUNGRYYYYYYYYYYY!"
And then Fluffy, the pet cat came in. "Mao!"
"Wait, aren't you Kitty, the cat from Full Metal Potatoe, the story that the author has been writing at school?"
"(shifty eyes) Maoooooo..."
But then Douglas' programming kicked in.
FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!
"Hmmm, Caaaaaaat... (Homer Simpson sound effect)"
"You know, that was some what disturbing."
"WAAH!"
AT THE WAREHOUSE!
"Aha! The reason why Signas is acting so dumb is because there was a virus planted in him! I finally solved the problem!" Dr. Cain rejoiced happily by jumping around in his blue robe-thing.
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! REAWREDNU GNIREAW TON S'EH! SEYE YMMMMMMMMMMMM! MEHT FO THGIE LLAAAAAAA! NURB YEHTTTTT!"
Of course, the spider had to suffer the agonizing view from under Dr. Cain's robe while trying not to get squished by Cain's hopping.
"Uhhhh, my friend says you're not wearing under wear." The idiot Signas said.
Dr. Cain looked embarrassed and gave a quick yelp as he tried to cover his swimsuit-area. But then he calmed down and gave a Sherlock Holmes-thinking-pose. "Of course. The mavericks must've planted this virus in him but why? ...OH SHIT!"
"TI STEG EH WONNNNN." The spider thought it was quiet obvious that the mavericks had implanted this stupid-virus in Signas as to distract Dr. Cain from their real goal.
And then all hell broke loose as the mavericks swarmed the warehouse (the spider had climbed to the rafters to avoid getting squished) and kidnapped Dr. Cain. As fast as they came, they left.
Alia was calm now and it took a couple of hail Mary's from Zero to stop her from killing him when she remembered that he smeared snot on her. Axl was entertaing the group (unintentially) by telling them his theory.
"And I certain that Sigma is my creator!"
"Oh really?" X had a certain tone of voice that oozed I-don't-believe-you-but-keep-talking-because-you're-freaking-funny but Axl was oblivious to this.
"Yeah! And for some reason in the next maverick uprising (cough cough game cough), I'm certain that it's going to hinted but not actually said!"
"Axl," X put his hand (or should I say Zero's? XD) "just becuase Your jewel-thing on your helmet looks like Sigma's jewel thing and the fact that Red Alert was maverick-"
"-Hence under Sigma's control." Axl added.
"-Under Sigma's control, and made demands for your return when you escaped, does not mean that Sigma wants his expiriment back so that he can use you to destroy me. Besides, no one would be that dumb to actually try that!"
Somewhere in the world, Capcom is crying.
But crying coporate executives aside, some one is at the door!
Robb came in fully armed with the tools of the trade for any mercanary. Explosives, body armor, gleaming-metal guns, a combat knife just in case, and a bottle of wine. Remember kids, don't drink liquor! It will kill you quicker!
Everyone stared at him.
"What? I like fine wines!"
There was a pregnant pause.
"Oh yeah, the guns and stuff. Well, it seems like I'm going back to work!" Robb smiled. X did not like the fact that Robb seemed happy to 'go back to work'.
"But what about the what The Order said! You can't do your mercanary stuff anymore! You're damn lucky that I saved you or else you'de be dead right now! And you're just going to throw your life away because working as a teacher isn't tough enough for you? ISN'T IT!" X was furious that Robb wasn't satisfied with his end of the deal when The Order decided to spare him only at the urgings of X. Otherwards, The Order would have spared a moment sentancing Robb to death for all the terrorist-esque acts he had comitted along with fellow merc, Dynamo. Heck, Robb had done so much bad stuff that the only reason why X had saved Robb was becuase Robb decided to save a group of kids from a falling building, and thought he had the potential to change his ways. The Order comprimised by sentancing Robb to be a teacher at MHHQ and be under parol by X, since he was the one who saved him. But X suffered severe reprimands and some other heignous stuff, followed by the fact that Robb liked to go against the rules, which caused X to be reprimanded even more but Signas was able to pull a couple of strings to prevent the more serious punishments that The Order had in mind.
Of course this didn't really cause anger in X until now because deep down, he knew that it was well worth it to spare Robb, but now that Robb was 'throwing all of his hard work away for his own selfish goals' it just all came back to him. All that he suffered.
Finished venting his anger, X realized what he had done. Everybody was staring at him and they were shocked. Tears began to swell in his eyes. "I-I'm sorry! I-It's just that-"
"Woah Zero, what the hell, man?" Robb was shocked and confused. He looked to Axl. "Post-Shock-Trauma? Sheesh did that knife guy get to you that bad? Don't worry, went through the same thing when I started as a merc. You'll get over it." He tried to sound reassuring but he chocked while talking. Now it made sense to him. Robb didn't really want to do this. He had to. "Axl," He patted Axl on the head and tried to smile. "You be good, kid." He turned to X. "Zero, I don't want sound annoying but I know what you're going through. Be tough, 'kay?"
And then he turned to Alia. "Alia," Robb nearly lost his smooth demeanor. "Oh, Alia, I-I.. Crap, Uh, well, just thanks, alright?" Robb then turned to Zero. "X," He grabbed Zero's hand put it to a strong hand shake. "I'm sorry that I'm wasting what you've worked for, but trust me, I don't want to this, They gave me an order." He let go and turned for the door. Before he left the room, he gave them a big cheezy smile and slammed the door behind them.
"NOW WAIT JUST DAMN MINUTE HERE! ROBB, GET YOUR ASS BACK!" X yelled.
Robb came back. "What the f-? Zero, if it's about where I'm heading then forget about-"
"DON'T CALL ME ZERO! I'M X DAMMIT!" He yelled.
The real Zero slapped his hands on X's mouth in order to stop him from telling Robb the truth. "X What do you think you're-! Crap, I did the same damn thing..." X licked the hand to make Zero let go, with fast results.
"Even if you don't beleive me, just hear me out! The Order, they forced you to, right?"
"Holy crap, X, you're-!"
"I can cancel the order! Just let me-!"
"No, X." Robb face was bleak. "They got Cain. They've made their ransom. Have to do this..." And then he changed subjects really quick. "You've switched!" He yanked on X's cheeck and looked at Zero as if the reaction was going to come out from him. Zero only looked mortified as he saw how ridiculous he looked with Robb pulling on his face. (You know what I mean by that, right?)
"Wait, then who are you?" Robb shook Alia by the shoulders. The he did same thing to Axl.
The gang explained to a confused Robb that only Zero and X switched. "O-okay then, this is new, alrighty then let's start all over again. X, whatever I said towards Zero I meant for you, since I can't remember. Before I forget," Robb took the note pad and wrote something really fast on it. "if I don't return in a month, do what the paper says."
And then he left for real.
