Okay, here's the deal, so listen up and well! What you do is read the question. When you answer the question, go to the number it specifies. Pretty simple, hmm? Just answer correctly! Will you get to SUCCESS? Or will you fail your job as hero and get a GAME OVER? This one is for Wind Waker, but the next one is fro Ocarina of Time, so if you've played that game but not this one, stay tunnified!

WARNING: Mild, yet totally obnoxious violence. Hide your children!


Today is your birthday. Your little sister, Aryll, finds you in the lookout. She tells you to come to your house, because your grandma has a special surprise for you. What do you do?

1 - Go to your house.

2 - Explore the town.

3 - Go into the forest.

1. You go to your house and upstairs. Your grandma tells you quite a long, boring story about your family history and coming of age and the Hero of Time and stuff. Then she gives you a weird outfit that's green and forces you into wearing it. Then she says to go get Aryll. What do you do?

4 - Go get Aryll.

5 - Go do some jobs.

2. You see an annoying boy that keeps saying "Happy birthday!" and pokes you with a stick. He's kind of annoying, so you go to see the rest of the villagers. What do you do?

6 - Go do some jobs.

7 - Go see if you can practice sword techniques with a sword.

3. You hear a rustling in the bushes. After going to see what it is, a monster pops out and kills you. GAME OVER.

4. You race back to the lookout to see Aryll. She has a special surprise for you. Aryll hands you her telescope, but gives you the warning that you can only use it for one day, so if you lose it, she'll cream you. You thank her and then practice using it. Suddenly, you see a huge bird up in the sky. It seems to be carrying a girl. A pirate ship is following it and shooting rocks at the bird. Once the bird is hit, it drops the girl into the forest. Aryll looks sad that a girl fell into the forest, because she might be hurt. What do you do?

8 - Go get your sword so you can save the girl.

9 - Keep practicing with the telescope.

10 - Run into the forest absent-mindedly.

5. One of the women on the island says that her pigs are missing. You run around searching for them all, but they keep running away once you find them. What do you do?

11 - Give up.

12 - Seek advice.

6. One of the women on the island says that her pigs are missing. You run around searching for them all, but they keep running away once you find them. What do you do?

11 - Give up.

12 - Seek advice.

7. You run off to Orca's house. When you enter, you find him meditating, but he's a weirdo so it's not that unexpected. When you ask him about learning about sword techniques, he tells you to fight him. After teaching you a number of tricks, he apologizes, saying that your grandma won't let you have a sword until you need one. What do you do?

13 - Whack him silly with a stick.

14 - Accept the fact that you can't get a sword yet and leave.

8. You go to Orca's house. Orca is drinking coffee, but sees that you "have a troubled look on your face", so he promises you sword practice. If you get everything right, the sword is yours. You perform every trick correctly and receive the blade. Now what?

15 - Off to the forest!

16 - Let's go swimming.

9. You keep practicing with the telescope, but practice so long that the girl gets killed by the monsters. Oh well, you never met her anyway. GAME OVER.

10. Considering you're completely swordless, you get killed by the monsters. GAME OVER.

11. You give up, so finally decide to go home and see what your grandma has to give you. It's some weird green outfit that kind of looks like a dress and tights. Though it really freaks you out, you are forced to wear it and be told an excruciatingly long story about the past. After that is through, your grandma tells you to go get Aryll. When you get there, she shows you her gift- a telescope, but you can only use it for one day. She tells you to practice on it and you look at your house. But then you see a bird up in the sky. It's carrying a girl and a pirate ship is firing rocks at it. As soon as it hits the bird, the girl falls into the forest. Aryll is squealing something about how horrible that is. What do you do?

17 - Go get a sword to save the girl.

18 - Run into the forest.

19 - Go find a job.

12. You find a man who tells you that the only way to capture a pig is to crouch down and sneak up on them. Pigs obviously aren't the brightest of creatures. Once you've captured all the pigs, the woman gives you sixty rupees, twenty for each pig. What do you do now?

20 - Go home to get Grandma's present.

21 - Try to find another job.

13. Orca looks very angry, so he will not let you get a sword. How upsetting. When you see a bird fly overhead and a girl falls into the forest, there's absolutely nothing you can do. GAME OVER.

14. You finally decide it's time to head home and see what your grandma got you. When she holds up a weird-looking green outfit, you are almost mad you came to your house. Still, it's part of the tradition and apparently so is a boring tale about history. Yawn. When that's finally finished, your grandma tells you to go get Aryll. What do you do?

22 - Go get Aryll.

23 - Make a sandcastle.

15. You've never been to the forest before and it doesn't look very inviting. But still, off in the distance, you see the girl hanging from the tree. But a monster approaches and with a few slashes with your sword, it dies. What are monsters doing in the forest? You have no time to think about that right now. Two other monsters come on birds and are dropped before you. They are also easy to kill. And apparently you got here just in time. The girl has landed in a tree, but the tree limb snaps. When you run over, she immediately insults you. Friendly girl. What do you do?

24 - Slash her with your sword. That wasn't a very nice little comment!

25 - Ignore the smart remark and try to help her.

16. Swimming has never done anything for you! But it is rather fun... Aryll gives you an angry look, so you have a feeling you should get your butt out of the water. What do you do?

26 - Talk to Aryll.

27 - Rush off to the forest!

17. Orca tells you that he will let you have a sword if you perform all of his tricks correctly. When you do, he hands it to you and "wishes you luck". Somehow he knows about the bird... old people are creepy that way. What do you do?

28 - Cut down some bushes with your new sword for practice.

29 - Run off into the forest to save the girl!

18. What a smart move. As soon as you enter, you see the girl, but a monster pops out at you. With no way to defend yourself, it's not a very good match. The last thing you see is a sword swung right at your neck. GAME OVER.

19. You earn a few rupees cutting down some grass, but realize you wasted your time when two birds carrying monsters head into the forest. If the girl has no protection, it won't look good for her. You don't have anyway to save her - if you had a sword, you could have made it in time. GAME OVER.

20. When you enter the house, your grandma gives you a weird outfit that looks kind of like a dress. You put it on, rather reluctantly, and then hear a boring story of the past. After that is over, your grandma tells you to go get Aryll. What do you do?

30 - Go get Aryll.

31 - Make cookies.

21. You cut the grass for somebody, but then you see a huge bird fly overhead. It drops a girl into the forest when hit with a rock thrown by a pirate ship. If only you had a sword. Shouldn't have spent so much of your time doing odd jobs. GAME OVER.

22. Aryll has a surprise for you when you get to the lookout - a telescope, her telescope, but you can only use it for one day. When you practice using it, you see a huge pirate ship shooting rocks at a bird that has a girl in its talons. When hit, the birds drops the girl into the forest. Aryll is yelling something about how horrible that is and that you should do something, but it's up to you. What do you do?

32 - Go get a sword to fight in the forest.

33 - Go have a quick breakfast.

23. Since when does making a sandcastle do anything? When a huge bird flies overhead and drops a girl in the forest, you rush in. But then you get attacked by monsters. Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo... everything gets dark. GAME OVER.

24. Ew. What a mess. Nothing happened; nothing happened... suddenly, a man comes into the forest you figure is one of the pirates. Dead Tetra... bloody sword... it's too obvious. You go to Juvenile Hall. Oh yeah, and your family has been dishonored or something from Yu Gi-OH! GAME OVER.

25. You try to explain what happened to her, when someone runs in, some pirate that worked for her. The girl's name is Tetra, you figure out. Obviously the pirate was worried about her, but Tetra doesn't really seem to care. The two of them run off, Tetra saying something about getting back at that bird. What do you do?

34 - Stay in the forest to meditate. It's peaceful in here.

35 - Walk out with them; it's the only exit anyhow.

26. You waste plenty of time talking to Aryll about seagulls. A scream come for the forest. Whoopsie... you delayed a little too long. Well, it's not like you knew her. GAME OVER.

27. You see the girl cornered by monsters. She takes out her sword and slashes them. I guess she did the job for you. At least she's not dead. When she sees you, you are immediately insulted by her, but choose to ignore the comment. A man runs in, saying that her name is Tetra and is grateful for her safety. They run outside, Tetra saying something about "repaying that bird's debt in full". What do you do?

34 - Stay in the forest to meditate. It's peaceful in here.

35 - Walk out with them; it's the only exit anyhow.

28. A little practice never hurt nobody. After cutting some of the bushes around your house (you hope your grandma doesn't kill you, but they miraculously grow back a few seconds later), you go into the forest. There's a girl hanging in a tree. A monster suddenly jumps out of nowhere and you slash it with your sword. It disappears in a puff of purple smoke. After attacking a few more monsters, you're wondering how to get the girl out of the tree, but that's taken care of when the limb breaks. The girl insults your outfit, but a pirate, one of her workers, runs in before you can say anything in defense of yourself. The girl's name is Tetra apparently and she's no picnic. Though the pirate cared a great deal about her safety, Tetra didn't much think about him. And what's worse is that they don't seem to realize you rescued her and are completely ignoring you. What do you do?

36 - Explain that you are the one that saved Tetra.

37 - Follow them out of the forest and decide they can figure it out on their own.

29. The forest is quiet... too quiet. But you see the girl in the tree and turn one bend and a monster jumps at you. Instinct makes you swing the sword and the monster disappears in a purple smoke, leaving behind a rupee. You pick it up and put it in your pocket. After fighting two more monsters, you see the girl fall from the tree. As you try to explain what happened, she seems to do all the talking and is not very nice. A pirate runs in and thanks gosh she's okay. After the two of them run out of the forest, what do you do?

38 - Follow them.

39 - Climb a tree.

30. You go to the lookout. Aryll tells you that a bird carrying a girl just flew overhead and dropped her into the forest after it was hit by a rock. Forget her present and getting Aryll- you have to save the girl. But how?

40 - Go get a sword from Orca.

41 - Rush in the forest anyway.

31. You make some really good cookies, but you've wasted some time. Aryll runs in saying that a girl was dropped in the forest some half an hour ago. What's the point of continuing even if you survived? GAME OVER.

32. You go to Orca's house to get your sword. He says you can have one if you perform every sword technique correctly. After doing so, you receive your sword. Now what do you do?

42 - Go to the forest.

43 - Play with a crab you found.

33. You crave for breakfast has made you late to save the girl. Bummer. GAME OVER.

34. You meditate happily, surrounded by cute little animals, when Tetra and her servant pirate run back in. She says that your sister has been captured by a bird and not that they really care, but thought you might want to know. What do you say?

44 - Nothing. You continue to meditate.

45 - " Oh no! I have to do something! Can I stow away on your pirate ship?"

46 - " Wanna be my girlfriend?"

35. When you walk out of the forest, you see Aryll standing on the other side of the bridge. She's waving, so you wave back. Tetra rolls her eyes and mumbles something about sappy brother/sister moments. But when Aryll starts to walk across the bridge, the huge bird comes back and picks her up and takes her away. What do you do?

47 - Jump stupidly at the bird.

48 - Stare as the bird flies away.

36. You try to explain you rescued her, but the girl explains that she must have saved herself. You try again, but the man with her says, "You calling Miss Tetra a liar!" He beats you to the ground and you wake up later in the forest surrounded by hungry bears. GAME OVER.

37. Sighing because they don't know you helped her, you follow the two of them out, seeing as there's nothing else left to do. Aryll is waving at you happily and starts walking across the bridge to you. Suddenly, a huge bird comes down and carries her away. Though she is shouting at you to help, there seems to be nothing you can do. You watch sadly as the bird flies away, but figure you must do something. What do you do?

49- Ask the pirate girl if she knows where the bird is taking Aryll

50- Jump off the cliff. I'll save you, Aryll!

38. You follow them out and see Aryll. She skips across the bridge, but gets taken up by a giant bird! You don't know what the heck to do, so you try to go after it. Unfortunately, there's a huge cliff. Fortunately, the girl and the other pirate grab you before you go hurtling to the ground to a bloody death. You thank her, but know you must do something. But what?

49- Ask the pirate girl if she knows where the bird is taking Aryll

51- Sigh, because this is the worst birthday ever and totally give up

39. You have fun tree climbing for a while, but all good things must come to an end when a squirrel with rabies bites your arm. Foaming at the mouth, you try to make it home, but with no prevail. GAME OVER.

40. You go to Orca's house and ask for a sword. He trains you for a while and then gives it to you, happy with your performance. Though you did well, you think you might need a little more practice first. Or should you save the girl?

52- Practice cutting a few bushes

53- Hurry off into the forest!

41. You go into the forest, where a bunch of monsters greet you. Monsters? In the forest? Alas, you have no way to protect yourself and perish before you get to save the girl. Oh well… it's not like your death will be MEANINGFUL or anything. GAME OVER.

42. You rush into the forest with your sword. The girl has just fallen from a tree she was in and is surrounded by monsters. You rush over there and kill them all, but the girl doesn't thank you when she wakes up. How horribly mean. You go outside together and see Aryll off in the distance with a bird. The girl says that she knows where the bird is going. What do you do?

54- Ask her if she can give you a ride there

55- Tell the girl she can leave now if she wants to

43. Oh boy! Crabs are so much fun, aren't they? Terribly sad, though, that you were so absorbed in your crab games that you forgot about the girl. A shriek comes from the forest and so do noises that sound like someone being devoured. You had a good birthday at least, so far. You see some pirates crying for some reason, but you still had a good day. GAME OVER. YOU ARE THE HERO. YOU CAN'T JUST PLAY WITH CRABS ALL DAY!

44. The pirates leave without you and you feel like such an idiot because you meditated the whole time, instead of finding a way to save Aryll. Aryll was devoured by hungry moblins. GAME OVER.

45. The girl looks totally bewildered that you would ask that question and says "No way!" Her comrade agrees with her. But a bird comes down, your mailman actually, and says that you were the one who rescued you. The girl finally agrees to let you come aboard, as long as you have some other way to protect yourself than "a dinky sword". What do you do?

56- Go find the family shield!

57- Stab her for that comment! That'll teach her not to call your sword "dinky"!

46. "NO YOU FREAK!" She punches you out and her comrade punches you in the nose. Your vision is all red and fuzzy. GAME OVER.

47. You jump at the bird and the girl tries to catch you, but misses. You fall onto the rocks bellow and stare at the scared villagers before your vision goes completely black. Your poor grandmother… GAME OVER.

48. You stare sadly and watch the bird fly away. You must do something! But what?

49- Ask the pirate girl if she knows where the bird is taking Aryll

51- Sigh, because this is the worse birthday ever and totally give up

49. The pirate girl says, "I do know, but I won't tell you unless you pay me!" What do you do?

58- Take out some birthday money and give it to her

59- No way! Stab her for that stupid comment. After all, it is your birthday

50. You do a belly flop into the water bellow. You can feel your heart stop abruptly. As you gasp for air, you wish you had looked before you leaped… literally. GAME OVER.

51. This birthday does totally suck, but because you gave up, Aryll died and was eaten by moblins. GAME OVER.

52. Practice makes perfect! You quickly learn some good sword techniques, than rush up into the woods. The girl is surrounded by monsters and you kill them. The girl has had one of her arms eaten, but whatever. She's not dead at least. Still, you feel bad for delaying her and give her a few rupees and try unsuccessfully to sew her arm back on. You sew it on backwards. That's okay. Maybe it'll be a fad. You drag her outside by her good arm and see Aryll crossing the bridge. Suddenly, a bird takes her away. What do you do?

60- Jump after her!

61- Try to wake up the girl to see what she knows about the bird

53. You kill some monsters you see running around and rescue the girl from the tree. Then you take her outside to see Aryll crossing the bridge. A bird comes and takes her away. What do you do?

60- Jump after her

61- Ask the girl to see what she knows about where the bird is going

54. She replies with a, "NO!" A bird person comes down and says that she should give Link a ride there, because he saved her. She finally agrees, but says she'll only help if Link gets some other way to protect himself besides a "stupid sword".

56- Go find the family shield!

57- Stab her for that comment! That'll teach her not to call your sword "stupid"!

55. The girl happily leaves and you see the ship casting off. Whoops. You needed a ride. Oh well. Aryll dies, but otherwise, it was a pretty good birthday. GAME OVER.

56. You race into your house to find the shield, but it's gone. Your grandma is holding it and asks you to bring Aryll home and that you should use the shield. What do you do?

62- Hug her (Kodak moment!) and promise the safe return of Aryll

63- Say, "Well, how much are paying me, Granny?"

57. Tetra dies, but you're next! Her comrade, Gonzo, pulverizes you. As you fade away and start to see the light, you are sorry for your wrong-doing. GAME OVER.

58. The girl happily pockets it and leads you to her ship. When she realizes all you have is a sword, she gives you a shield. What next?

64- Set sail! Aye-aye!

65- Hug everyone in the village to say good-bye

59. Tetra dies, but the other pirates find out. Uh-oh. You climb a tree to try to get away, but a tree-climbing wolf bites you and you die anyhow. The pirates beat you with clubs. Ah, such a sad way to die. GAME OVER.

60. Alas, you perish in the rocky depths below. GAME OVER.

61. The girl knows where the bird is going- A scary-sounding place called "Forsaken Fortress". What do you do?

66- TOO SCARY! I'm staying here!
67- Bravely ask for a ride! You'd do anything for your sister!

62. Your grandma hands you the shield, glad that you are "such a nice boy". Then you go back outside to Tetra. She asks if you are ready. Are you?

68- Yes

69- No

63. Oh no! You forgot your grandma knows Tai-Kwon-Do! She kicks you into the wall and you faint. She goes after Aryll herself. So much for being the hero… GAME OVER.

64. Off you go! The islanders wave good-bye to you as you leave and you wave back. You've never left your island before, so this will be quite an adventure. Your grandma waves to you, so you have to her too. Tetra says you're a wimp. How do you react?

70- "Wimp! Die!"

71- "So where are we going?"

65. It is kind of you to say goodbye to everyone, but you've spent far too much time with your sappy ending and Aryll dies. GAME OVER.

66. Too scary? For you? Very well then. While you are hiding at home because of your cowardice, Aryll gets eaten by moblins. GAME OVER.

67. "Fine, you can have a ride, as long as you bring your own protection with you," Tetra replies. You go looking for some other way to protect yourself. Where do you look?

72- At home

73- In the forest

68. Ding, ding! You cast off, waving goodbye to everyone. Tetra tells you that you are going to Forsaken Fortress, but you need to work on the ship to make up for the ride. Ah, nuts. What do you do?

74- Begin working with Tetra's swabby, Niko

75- No way! I'm the hero! I don't have to do WORK!

69. What are you waiting for? To get killed again! A giant wave comes up and drowns you. Perhaps the gods would be happier if you had said "yes". GAME OVER.

70. You stab Tetra and throw her lifeless corpse into the water. When the pirates find out by the blood on your sword that you did, no matter how many songs you whistle, they stab you and throw you into the water, too. You drift into an endless sleep. GAME OVER.

71. Tetra seems slightly disappointed that you are ignoring her evil comments, but tells you that you are going to Forsaken Fortress. She says it is dangerous, so you'll need all the protection you can get. Then you have to swab the decks. By nightfall you are there and Tetra calls you up to the crow's nest. What do you do?

76- Go up there

77- Ignore her, because you're starting to have second thoughts

72. Your grandmother gives you the shield and says how much she loves you. You go back and cast off. While waving goodbye, you notice Tetra has a rather smirkish look on her face. What do you do?

78- Punch her in the gut! Yeah!

79- Ignore her look and go ask the other pirates about why Tetra's such a scallywag

73. But the monsters return and kill you. Blood stings at your eyes and fills your mouth. You begin to choke on the blood and wonder why, why didn't you go home first? GAME OVER.

74. Niko is proud of your hard work and gives you a spoils' bag. Tetra calls you and you find her on the crow's nest. It is nighttime and she points to the Forsaken Fortress. She says that the only way to get in is by catapult. What do you do?

80- Sadly agree to use the catapult

81- Say, "Uh-uh, girlfriend! You're not getting me in there!"

75. "Well, that's too bad, Mr. Stuck-Up Lazypants!" Tetra pushes you into the water and you cannot find the surface underneath the boat. Your last breath escapes you and all hope is lost as you plummet to the bottom of the sea. GAME OVER.

76. Tetra tells you that the security is so tight on Forsaken Fortress that the only way to get in is by catapult. What say you?

80- Sadly agree to use the catapult

81- Say, "Uh-uh, girlfriend! You're not getting me in there!"

77. "LINK!" Tetra calls you again. "GET YOUR LAZY BUTT UP HERE!" But you have agreed to disagree and therefore, the pirates kill you with their swords. Blood gushes and your head throbs as you go to a better place. GAME OVER.

78. Tetra looks like she's in a lot of pain, but still rips your heart out. With no way to pump oxygen and blood through your arteries, you quickly turn blue and die. GAME OVER.

79. The pirates tell you of Tetra's mother dying. As sad as that is, you don't really care because she's such a barnacle. Suddenly, you hear Tetra calling you. You go up there and are suddenly catapulted into Forsaken Fortress! What do you do?

82- Scream and except fate

83- Try to turn yourself a different way

80. Tetra flings you into Forsaken Fortress. Gee, thank goodness that hard wall broke your fall or that would've really hurt! You peel yourself off and look around. The place is heavily guarded and you don't know what happened to your sword. What do you do?

84- Turn yourself in and save the moblins the trouble

85- Think up a plan to get past everything without your sword

81. Tetra kicks you for insulting her equipment. You're in so much pain you can hardly breath. GAME OVER.

82. You here something crack when you hit the wall, but are still awake enough to see where you're going. But your sword- it's gone! What do you do?

84- Turn yourself in and save the moblins the trouble

85- Think up a plan to get past everything with your sword

83. When you try to turn yourself, you accidentally land in the water a few feet from Forsaken Fortress. Darn! Now you have to swim. You finally get inside, but a moblin is waiting for you! What do you do?

86- Take out your sword and attack!

87- Quiver in fear and beg he spare your life

84- A few minutes later of thinking, your pocket rumbles. You take out a necklace with a blue stone on it. Tetra explains that she can talk through the stone to you. You ask for some help, but she says she doesn't exactly know what to do either. What do you do?

88- Run across to the castle like the dickens!

89- Hide under a barrel you spotted

85. It works! The moblin dies and explodes in a puff of purple smoke. You take the rupees that landed from your killing into your pocket and proceed into the castle. You are in a large kitchen, but a few devil-like creatures come out and attack! What do you do?

90- Slay them with my sword!

91- Become very cocky. I don't need a sword when I have fists!

86. Alas, moblins spare no one. The moblin eats you bit by bit and saves your head for last so you have time to think about your foolish behavior. GAME OVER.

87. The search lights spot you and you are thrown into prison. Tetra tells you that usually old jails like this one have more than one way out. What do you do?

92- Give up. What a sucky birthday

93- Search around for an escape

88. You cut two eye slits in the barrel and walk around. When a search light shines on you, you duck and cover. You get inside and manage to get past the rest of the guards. When you get into an area of the castle, you find your sword and defeat some enemies guarding the door. You open it… and there's Aryll! She's so happy to see you. But the bird comes in through the sky roof! What say you?

94- "Spare me, Mr. Bird!"

95- "We're having CHICKEN tonight!"

89. The devils die and you continue to explore Forsaken Fortress. Huzzah! It's Aryll! You try to unlock the door, but the giant bird comes in. What do you do?

96- Okay, now I use my fists! It's just a bird!
97- More slaying to be done! You take out your sword.

90. Okay, perhaps you became too cocky. The devils slice you into tiny bits and throw you into the pot of stew. You will taste rather good with a little salt. GAME OVER.

91. You give up and a moblin comes in with a knife and a cooking pot. Too late to escape now. He sharpens the knife and turns your lights out. GAME OVER.

92. Aha! You find a way out. You go through several tunnels and find the room Aryll is in! But lo! It's the giant bird! And there's your sword as well. What do you do?

98- I attack! Hup-ya!

99- Beg forgiveness for intruding

93. The bird spares no one, so you're eaten. Do I even have to say it? Yes I do. GAME OVER.

94. You kill the bird with many blows of your sword and rescue Aryll. Hurray! Your mission is completed. Tetra takes you back home and you live Happily Ever Birthday. SUCCESS!

95. But the bird eats you, because fists are lame. GAME OVER.

96. You kill the bird with many blows of your sword and rescue Aryll. Hurray! Your mission is completed. Tetra takes you back home and you live Happily Ever Birthday. SUCCESS!

97. You kill the bird with many blows of your sword and rescue Aryll. Hurray! Your mission is completed. Tetra takes you back home and you live Happily Ever Birthday. SUCCESS!

98. Too bad. The bird accepts your apology and when all looks well and you turn around, it eats you. GAME OVER.


Wow. That was long. I know it wasn't fanfiction, but I needed to post it somewhere.