A/N: I couldn't resist writing the other side of the story. I'm literally just trying to keep it together until we find out about the letter and this is helping me cope.

Disclaimer: If I owned anything, I'd already know what's in the letter and wouldn't need a distraction.


Elliot Stabler hated the rain.

It was always so intrusive, popping up at the most convenient times. Like now, when he was standing on a street corner 15 blocks from his own home after a massive fight with his soon-to-be ex-fiance.

He didn't quite know where the evening went wrong. This morning he'd gotten up for work as usual, but instead of heading to the beat, he had an interview for his bid to become a detective. He knew it was soon. Just a few years in service, not even 22 yet (that was next month), but his military background, exceptional performance at the academy, and his high collar rate were all playing in his favor.

He caught a ride to the train station with a neighbor. He'd nailed the interview, and Kathy picked him up that night and drove to their favorite Italian restaurant, Vinnie's, to celebrate.

It had been nice to have a night just the two of them. Maureen was at Kathy's parents' place and they had a few months before their next bundle of joy showed up. They ate pasta and he drank wine. Everything seemed to be going fine until right before they were getting ready to leave.

"Do you really have to try to make detective now?" Kathy asked.

Elliot couldn't quite figure out why, because they'd discussed it before and he laid it all out for her-how becoming a detective could mean more stable hours, less late nights, and ultimately better pay-she'd been excited.

Of course, that had been before they found out about the second pregnancy.

"I thought we talked about this?" Elliot said with a little bite in his tone. He was tired of her second guessing his decisions when all he ever did was think about her and Maureen, and the new baby.

It's why they even stayed together, got engaged, in the first place. He wanted to get married before Maureen was born, but Kathy wanted a real wedding. Not a big one, but a real one, with the church and family and a party afterwards. Plus, she wanted to wear a wedding dress she actually liked. So they waited until after Maureen was born, but then her parents told them they wouldn't pay for it after what they'd gone and done (given them a grandchild they adored, Elliot always liked to remind himself). So they didn't have enough money for a real wedding and he barely had money for the ring.

"But things have changed since we talked about it," Kathy said, pointing at her belly, as if he didn't remember.

"And that's exactly why I'm doing this Kath," he said, scrubbing a hand over his face. "We need to get married. We need a bigger place. We need more money. And this job can do that."

"But with Maureen, and being pregnant, and night school, I can't do it all," Kathy said. "I'm already basically a single parent and a college student. And if you become a detective you'll be a low man on the pole, again. Late nights, on call all the time, no seniority and no leeway."

"Well you can't exactly tell victims you have to get home for diaper duty," he said, hoping it came across as a joke, but he knew it didn't.

"I can't keep doing this," Kathy said, pacing in the Vinnie's lobby. "I can't keep juggling all these balls in the air while you run around playing cops and robbers and throwing yourself in front of bullets."

"That was one time Kathy, and it barely nicked me," he said. "There's not even a scar."

"I just can't anymore, El," she said defeated. She slipped her engagement ring into his palm and turned to leave.

"Maybe just don't come home tonight," she said. "And I'll move back into my parents' place with Maureen this weekend."

Then she turned and left. Elliot stood there stunned for a few minutes not believing what she'd just done. He ran out to catch her and realized it was raining. He also realized she had the keys in her purse and had taken the car. She'd told him not to come home, but there was no way in hell he was staying away. They didn't do all of this, fight for all of this, just to throw it away.

So he started walking, sloshing really, back home.

And that's how he found himself standing in the pouring rain on a street corner when a car pulled up to the curb and someone inside rolled down the window.

"Hey," the woman in the car yelled, though it was hard to hear her over the drops.

He cocked an eyebrow at her, wondering why someone would pull over in this weather to have a chat. But he walked to the window anyway.

"Yeah?" he said, leaning into the car, finally being able to see the person at the steering wheel without water in his eyes. She was young, but she was also gorgeous.

"You need a ride?" she questioned.

He looked down the road toward home. Kathy had told him not to come back tonight and she really probably wouldn't appreciate him pulling up soaked in a car with a woman she didn't know. But, if he could get back there before she arrived with Maureen, Kathy would never know. That thought made him smile.

"That'd be great," he said, pulling for the handle. "Thanks."

He got in, very aware of the fact that he was dripping wet everywhere. He didn't know where to put his hands, not wanting to drip on the carpet or the dash, but his pants were soaked too.

"Sorry about the mess," he said. "I didn't really expect to be standing out in a rainstorm."

"Don't worry about it," she said. "This car has seen worse."

He didn't really want to think about what could be "worse" than all this water in her car. But for a pretty girl like her it probably meant drunk friends or manipulative boyfriends in the backseat.

"So, where can I drop you off?" she asked.

He knew better than to lead a stranger right to his front door. If she could just get him within two or three blocks he still might have time to beat Kathy home.

"That depends," he said. "Where are you headed, so I don't take you too far out of your way?"

"Oh, I'm just out for a drive," she said. "So anywhere, really."

He bit his lip. He didn't really want to make this girl drive him home. He checked his watch and realized that it'd been nearly an hour since he left the restaurant by now and Kathy had probably already locked him out for the night. His house keys were on the car keyring, which she had.

"Mind if I just come along for the ride for a while?" he asked. "At this point, there's nowhere I really need to be."

Thankfully, the girl didn't ask any more questions. She just turned the radio on low to some classic rock station and put the car in drive.

They didn't talk, but the silence was comfortable. He'd been in a lot of enclosed spaces with Marines, perps, and victims, but he's never felt this calm about it. He didn't feel the need to make small talk or keep a conversation going. It was nice, until something caught the corner of his eye.

"Look out!" he yelled, just as a deer tried to make its way across the road.

She slammed on the brakes and missed the deer, but with all the water on the road she hydroplaned into the curb and that sickening pop was definitely a tire.

"Son of a…" she muttered under her breath, reaching to unlock her seatbelt.

But he was already soaked and as much as this girl looked like she could probably take care of herself, Elliot wasn't about to let a woman, nor a civilian, crawl around on the road at night to check a tire.

"I'll get out and take a look," he said.

"No," she said, reaching out and putting her hand on his bicep. He felt an electric tingle where her fingers grazed him. "I know somewhere we can take it.

She inched the car two blocks down to an all-night service station Elliot had never trusted. He'd heard too many stories from the Queens cops about what went on in the back room at this place. She parked under an awning and was out of the car and stalking into the office before he could even get his seatbelt off. He followed her in, just in case something bad happened, but by the time he was in there, she was already yelling at the attendant.

"It's really going to take you seven hours to replace a tire?" she said. "What kind of 24 hour service is that?"

"Supply and demand," the man said, taking a sip of his PBR and flipping to the next page in Playboy.

Elliot didn't know what this guy was capable of or if he had a gun behind the counter. He wished he'd thought to pack his off-duty weapon this morning, but he didn't.

"Look pal," he said, trying to placate the attendant. "The lady just needs a tire."

"It'll be done by 7 a.m.," he said with a belch. "There's a motel next door and you're welcome to wait or try to push your car home in the rain."

His driving partner threw her keys down on the counter with such force that it startled him a bit.

"I'll be back at 6:59, and it better be done," she growled before stalking out of the office, and again, he had no choice but to follow her.

They dashed across the parking lot to the motel and were both completely soaked by the time they got inside. They stumbled into the lobby where the night manager was snoozing at his post. She slammed her hand down on the bell to wake him up.

Elliot hated this place too. This entire block was nothing but seedy scum, and this particular establishment, a pay-by-the-hour joint, was a haven for drugs, partying, and reported sex trafficking. But what were they going to do? Walk around in a monsoon looking for another place to stay? He was going to invite this girl back to his house for the night while Kathy was already furious with him? Yeah, right.

When the night manager snorted awake and realized they were standing there, she spoke first.

"We need two rooms for the night," she said.

"Best I can give you is one," he said.

"There's like 50 rooms in this place and you're saying all 49 are booked?" she said with a bite in her voice, and he tried not to think about how she knew the number of rooms in the motel.

"Big wedding on Saturday and big funeral tomorrow," he said. "Room 205. Take it or leave it."

"We'll take it," he said before she could argue any further. He just wanted to get out of the lobby and away from anyone or anything that could make this night worse. At least they'd be somewhat safer in their own room. He tossed some cash on the counter, more than enough to pay for the room until morning and grabbed the key. He started up the stairs and it was her turn tto follow him.

When they got to room 205, he opened the door and stepped inside, holding it open for her.

"Great accommodations," he joked, considering the room was nothing but a bed, bathroom and a television with a cracked screen. They could hear something on the other side of the wall that sounded like a rager and Elliot cringed.

They were both dripping all over the floor as he shut the door.

"I did not plan on this," she murmured, trying to wring out the end of her t-shirt.

"Trust me," he said. "Neither did I."

He hadn't planned on any of this. And what exactly were they going to do with a gross motel room with one bed in sticky disgusting clothes that weighed about 100 pounds?

"I really wish I had a change of clothes in my purse," she griped. "Wet denim is so unforgiving."

Elliot had an idea. He went into the bathroom that wasn't great but could look much worse for the place they were in. He found exactly what he wanted. Two oversized towels. He brought them out to her.

"I don't want to think about where those have been," she said as he held one out to her.

The next thing he said was out of his mouth before he could stop it.

"Well, we could just dry off with them," he said. "Or we could change into them."

"Are you crazy?" she asked.

In fact, he probably was crazy. But he wanted out of this tie and these ridiculous dress clothes. Even if it was just to put on a grimy towel in a room with a woman he didn't know. It's not like he'd never been naked in a room of strangers before. Sports, the service, and the locker rooms at work had pretty much eroded his modesty.

Of course, nobody in the locker rooms looked like her.

"It's either this towel or wet denim," he said with a smirk.

She yanked one of the offending items from his arms, stalked to the bathroom, and slammed the door shut.

She took about 20 minutes in the bathroom, which he was grateful for. It gave him time to strip down, calm down, and find a place to lay out his clothes. When she finally emerged from the bathroom, he was bare chested with his towel tied around his waist.

He tried not to stare at her. He knew it was wrong. Up until a few hours ago he'd been engaged. His entire purpose of the night had been to go home to win Kathy back, but he couldn't deny this woman was gorgeous. Her brown hair was long and beautiful, curling throughout thanks to the water. Her big brown eyes were innocent but full of stories. He tried not to think too hard about her body and how the towel clung to it, lest he embarrass himself. He felt himself lick his lips at the thought and hoped she didn't see.

They both somehow found their way to the bed, the only place to sit in the room. The full size wasn't nearly big enough for the both of them, especially not clad in just towels. He was having a really hard time restraining himself. It would be so easy to just reach out and touch her. To just do something wild and fun for one night.

"It's amazing how little there is to do in a motel when you can't watch TV," she cracked, breaking into his train of thought.

"We could do pushups," he tossed back as a joke and he heard her snicker. It did nothing to help what he was feeling.

"We could talk," she suggested, and he tensed.

Talk? She wanted to talk? And what was he going to say? Hi I'm Elliot. I'm a cop and a massive screwup who's in a seedy hotel room with a gorgeous woman I don't actually know because my fiance broke up with me for trying to make a better life for us and our soon-to-be two kids. And even though that should be the most pressing thing on my mind all I can really think about now is screwing your brains out? Yeah. That'd work.

"I'm not really up for talking right now," he said. "Everything I thought I knew in the world kind of came crashing down around me tonight and I just… want to forget."

She looked sad for a moment. Pensive even. Almost like she really did understand what it meant to just want to be someone else for a while. Be a person completely different from who you were. Let go.

He shifted his weight on the bed and their hands brushed accidentally. He felt that electric shock again when they touched. Brown eyes caught blue ones and he felt something he hadn't felt, not really, since before he and Kathy found out they were going to be parents the first time: desire.

"We could forget together," she said, deliberately taking his hand.

That was all he needed to hear, and then his lips were on hers.


Elliot had never had a night like that. He was pretty sure half of it was actually an out of body experience. Eight times in succession.

She fell asleep before he did, curled up with his arms around her. He thought about how wrong it all was but how it somehow felt right. He didn't know this woman at all, but somehow it felt like he'd known her all his life.

He drifted off to sleep as he breathed in the flowery scent from her hair.

He awoke with a start the next morning when he heard a crash in the next room. He didn't remember where he was or what he was doing. He looked around the room and he was in the empty, disgusting motel room. Alone.

He knit his eyebrows together and wondered if he dreamed the whole thing. That was, until he noticed a note on the second pillow.

Thanks for a wonderful night. I'll never forget it. Please don't come looking for me. We'll keep this memory between us.

It wasn't a dream. She'd been real, and now she was gone.

He checked his watch. It was 8:30, and he wondered if her car really had been done at 7 a.m. He dressed quickly, threw the room key at the morning desk attendant and sprinted to the service station, but her car wasn't where she left it last night.

He went inside just to be sure. A different, less disgusting man was behind the counter now.

"Did a woman come in here a little while ago to pick up a car with a flat tire?" he asked.

The man shook his head.

"I just started my shift a few minutes ago and nobody's been in yet, but let me check the log," the man said, flipping through pages on a clipboard.

"Yeah, so we had a flat tire come in last night, but whoever picked it up at 7 this morning paid cash. No other record."

Elliot didn't know why he felt so bad about it. One night of fun. That was all they did. Two people in the rain trying to forget, trying to pretend they were people they weren't. So why did he feel so damn guilty?

Then, he was running 13 blocks home. He had to get to Kathy before she left for good. It was just the wake-up call he needed.


Seven Years Later

"Yes, Kath," Elliot said into the phone. "I'll get the twins from your mom's house and pick up Vinnie's takeout on the way home."

"Kathleen's expecting it because she got the lead in her class play," Kathy said. "Remember we told her she could get from anywhere if she got the part."

"I remember," Elliot said, scrubbing a hand over his face and looking at the framed photo on his desk. It was taken the day the twins were born, just about nine months ago. Kathy looked exhausted, holding Elizabeth. Maureen and Kathleen were up on the bed with her, cooing over their new sister, and he was standing next to them holding Dickie, his only son.

He was thankful everyday that he went back to Kathy and made things right. They worked it out. She finished school, and he did become a detective, and he started in Special Victims about three years ago. He was good at the job, and his captain was great and very forgiving about trying to let him balance work and family life.

"Elliot, get in here," Cragan yelled from his office.

He pushed back from his desk and sauntered into the office, wondering what he'd done this time.

"Olivia, meet your new partner, Elliot Stabler," Cragan said as he stepped in. There was a woman standing in the office dressed in black slacks and a white button up shirt. She had a short bob, brown with a reddish tint, and big, innocent brown eyes. Standing by her side was a little girl, not much younger than Kathleen.

He felt like he knew her from somewhere but he just couldn't place it. Maybe a police function. Maybe he knew the kid from somewhere? A girl from Kathleen's school?

He cocked his head at her before sticking a hand out to shake.

"Stabler," he said.

"Olivia Benson," she said, shaking with him. He heard it before he felt it, her voice. It sounded familiar too. Then an electric jolt in his fingers as she grasped his hand.

"Mommy, it's Olivia Messer," the girl huffed. Elliot realized this must be her daughter.

"Not at work, baby," Olivia said with a snicker. "I still use my maiden name here."

And that's when he realized where he knew her from. The snicker gave it away. The woman from the motel all those years ago who left him with nothing but a note.

"Who's this," Elliot said, squatting down to the little girl's level. His eyes widened when he looked into her face. He'd know her eyes anywhere. He saw them every day when he looked in the mirror. Saw them every time he looked at one of his children.

And with that thought in his head, he realized she must be about seven years old, and it took everything in him not to pass out right there.

"Chelsea Messer," she said, smiling and shaking Elliot's hand. "Captain says you're going to keep my Mommy safe."

Keep her mommy safe? After her mommy ran out on him and never bothered to tell him he had another child?

"Well, that is my job," Elliot said. "I'm her partner, for better or worse."

He didn't get to say anything else because his new "partner" intervened.

"This has been fun," Olivia said, pulling Chelsea slightly towards the door. "But we don't want to interrupt your cases. I officially start Monday so you can catch me up to speed then."

But he wasn't going to let her leave that way again.

"Before you go," Elliot said. "Chelsea, I have two daughters just about your age, Maureen and Kathleen. And I have to say, your eyes are just so pretty. You remind me of them."

He looked up at her and she'd gone pale. Now she knew he knew. And it served her right.

"Chelsea, why don't you go wash your hands before we go to the bakery," Olivia said in a fake happy voice. "Captain, could you show her where the bathrooms are?"

"Sure," Cragan said, leading the little girl out of his office.

He just couldn't help himself from making a smart remark.

"So, seven years ago all I got was an unsigned note, and today I get a partner and a kid?" he asked sarcastically, his fists balling at his sides.

He wanted to scream. He wanted to punch a wall, or a perp, or a garbage can. All this time he had another child out there that he knew nothing about. What if she didn't have a father? What if she thought he'd abandoned her and didn't love her? And oh hell, what was Kathy going to do when she found out?

He didn't get to spend too much time thinking about that because she spoke the second Cragan and Chelsea were out of earshot.

"Listen closely, because I'm only going to say this once," she whispered but it came out more like a growl. "That night that we spent together was wonderful, but I'm in love with someone else. My husband, Mark, is a good man. The night he proposed to me he told me there was a 99% chance he couldn't have children, and when I found out I was pregnant he called her our miracle baby. I have worked damn hard to get here today and I won't let you or anyone else ruin that. It sounds like you have a family too, and I'm not going to let one night wreck either one of them, my family or yours. You can ask the Captain for a new partner if you can't handle this. Otherwise, nobody here or anywhere else can know, and I'll see you Monday."

Then, Olivia turned on her heel and walked back into the squad room, picking Chelsea up from Cragan and heading for the elevator.

Cragan didn't come back into his office right away, stopping to talk to Munch about something, so Elliot stayed where he was, watching her. He didn't break eye contact until the elevator doors shut.

And outside, it started to rain.


A/N: So how'd you like that side? I might continue, I might not. But you know what to do now, right? Review please!