No Sleep Tonight
"Are you okay?"
He grinned down at her. "Yes."
"You sure?"
He dipped his head to kiss her. "MmmHmm."
"Do you always experience this back and forth in your head when you're with someone?" Liv asked. She was genuinely curious about what made him tick. If this was normal or if he was just having issues with her.
He brushed a lone ringlet curl from her forehead and kissed the skin there. God, she was beautiful. In a quiet voice he said, "no."
"Oh." Olivia thought that over for a minute. "So, it's just me that's forcing you to be in your head so much right now?"
That was as close to perfectly explaining the unexplainable as he could imagine. "Yea."
"That's bad, isn't it?" She thought they had a connection. Something that felt...strong. Or raw. Or...hell, she didn't know. She had never experienced anything like it before. She could be funny one minute, serious the next, and felt more seen than she ever had before the next. It had been a wild evening to be sure.
"Hey! No. It's not bad. It's the exact opposite of being bad." He was sounding like an asshole again, but somehow unable to stop it, so he let it tumble out. "I think I'm so cautious with you – being careful not to hurt you or do anything you aren't comfortable with – because it's...important somehow. I don't know how to say that without sounding like an insane person, but that's the truth of it! You matter. I mean...Jesus, of course you matter. You matter to me! I am looking at you and I'm wondering..."
"What?" She asked too fast. Quieting her voice, she asked, "I mean, what are you wondering?"
His thumb stroked her cheek before he pecked her lips. "I feel like the more I say the greater the chances are of scaring you off with my bullshit?"
She pushed him off and sat up in bed, bringing the tangled sheets up with her. "Is it? Bullshit I mean? Are you just telling me what you think I want to hear?"
He sat up beside her and looked into her eyes. "No. I'm not doing that. I've done it before to other women, I'm ashamed to admit, but I am not doing that now. Not with you."
"Okay."
"Do you think I'm an asshole?"
"No." After a quiet minute, she added, "I've done the same thing to a few guys in my past before too."
"What?" He shouted with fake outrage. Pulling away from her he began to tickle her ribs.
Liv shrieked loudly, giggling like a crazed kid. "STOP IT! STOP IT NOW!"
"You made me feel like shit for twelve whole seconds. That's one lip lick taken away." He threatened with an evil smile. They both knew he was lying. Even as he said it, the need to lick them was getting unbearable.
She stilled at his words. "Awww."
He simply shook his head back and forth at her adorableness. As she did her best to give him puppy dog eyes, he licked his lips in super slow motion. The crazy grin he watched bloom on her face was indescribable.
He began to chuckle until she joined in, but moments after it started, it stopped when Liv pulled his face down for a soft heart stopping kiss. When she pulled her head back and looked him in the eye, she asked a serious question. "Am I going to scare you off with my bullshit if I say that the way I feel when I'm with you feels a lot like love?"
How do you ask someone a question that is so full of everything that is on your heart, but you can't imagine speaking it out loud for fear of mockery or rejection? And even as you are trying to figure out how to put the words together, the person you want to say the words to, says the exact same thing to you about how they feel? It was a magical moment for both of them.
The two of them just looked at each other, heads full of questions, hearts full of a love that would last through generations and touch so many lives that love would spill over onto everyone they held dear. Their shy smiles turned into knowing grins. He held her hand, and pulled her onto his lap. Resting his head in the crook of her neck he softly said, "not at all. I'm just glad you said it before we had sex."
Liv giggled. "Why is that?"
"It's pretty typical for a woman to profess her love for me after sex."
"Oh my god!" She shrieked, giggling louder and trying to get off his lap. He held her tightly in place and returned his head to its resting spot.
"I'm kidding. Sex confuses emotion sometimes. What is meant to be a one night stand sometimes is confused with forever."
"You're talking about the person who tries to make a relationship out of a physical need?"
"Exactly." She got it!
"So, which am I in this scenario?" Liv asked with a grin.
"Well...not to be cheesy or presumptuous, but I can see you as my forever." He exhaled loudly, but felt so much lighter for saying the words out loud.
Liv turned in his arms so they were face to face and she was straddling him. She brushed the top of her index finger across his cheek. "I love cheesy stuff."
He held onto her back and tried to ignore the hardness between them as they sat like this. "Yea?"
"MmmmHmmm."
This new information had to be properly tested. "What's your favorite chick flick?"
"Serendipity." She answered without hesitation.
"John Cusack is a legend in that film."
"Bet your ass he is. He's almost as amazing as Kate Beckinsale."
"Truth! What's your favorite summer chick flick?
"How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days."
"Another great choice." Fitz shot her a worried look. "You wouldn't do any of the things to me that she did to him, would you?"
"I brought a love fern with me to leave here." She teased with a chuckle.
Fitz laughed loudly at her and pulled her closer. "You're my kinda crazy, Liv."
She pulled out of his embrace, tilted her head, and kissed him. In no time at all, it turned passionate. She felt her back gently hit the mattress once more and broke the kiss to inhale air. Fitz had his mouth in her neck in a flash. "Without overthinking it anymore, show me."
With his weight on his elbows on either side of her body, Fitz instantly came out of her neck. He guided his hardened length to her entrance and pushed very lightly. Looking down at her patient brown eyes, and filled with overwhelming strong feelings for her, he once again, licked his lips very slowly. The moment her eyes dipped to watch her favorite show, he pushed himself all the way inside of her with one thrust.
Her grip on his shoulders tightened significantly and she groaned at the magnificent intrusion. She would never look at his lip licking quite the same now. "Holy shit! You did that on purpose!"
He knew she would want an answer, but he was gonna need a minute before he could even remember how to talk. He focused on breathing in and out and not on the exquisite feeling of his lower region being snugly surrounded in heat. Finally, he gave it a try, but it was in between deep breaths. "Well, yea...You...shit...you said not to overthink it. So...umm..I didn't."
"I'm getting some satisfaction knowing you're having a hard time too." She chuckled.
"Don't laugh!" He demanded.
That made her laugh even harder.
"Liv, I swear to god! You are going to make me lose it!"
He'd better not ever lose his ridiculous side. "What are you fifteen years old? The worst that happens is we go again and I don't laugh the next time."
"That's not the plan."
"We're not going a second time?" She continued to tease.
He shot her a look that had her questioning her own stamina. "We're going to go a hell of a lot more than that before I let you go to sleep."
That shut her up.
And that was the moment Fitz began to move. Slow and steady strokes that began to ignite the inferno already threatening to incinerate them both. "Feels so good."
She opened her legs wider and moved with his hips. This intimate closeness with Fitz was nothing short of perfect. There were no awkward silences, no thoughts of how quick can I get out of here afterwards, no list of things she had to do the next day to fill her mind until the act was over. It was perfect. He was perfect.
He was looking at her like she was the only thing that mattered in his world. Always mindful of her and her comfort and needs. He wasn't trying to make this a fairy tale, but inserted humor into the conversation – right in the middle of sex. And wasn't he amazing for not expecting her to be some sex starved nympho who thought he was the greatest man on the planet. It just happened to be a coincidence that she actually thought that. Her ridiculous bigfoot was the dream. How crazy was that? She grinned at the thought.
"Something you want to share with the class?" He prompted as he pushed himself slowly back inside of her.
She snorted. "No. Just thinking."
He eyed her lips as she talked. He had to kiss her soon. It wasn't a want it was a need. "How come? I thought we agreed that wasn't a good thing with us?"
"You're right. I'm sorry."
"You know how you can make it up to me?" He mocked.
"I thought I was making it up to you quite well right now?" She replied with a slow smile.
"Sex? No! We are never going to use sex as a way to fix something that is wrong between us. Deal?"
"Deal. Whaddya want, Grant?"
She might not get any sleep tonight, he thought. He continued to methodically move his hips up and down. "Kiss me."
Bringing her hand to the back of his neck and pulling his face down to hers, Olivia held eye contact with him until their lips met. It was then that her grip on his hair tightened while her other hand reached under his and slid down one side of his back until it landed on his ass. Groaning, she gave it a light pinch and moved her hips a little faster.
"Mmm!" Fitz groaned in surprise with his mouth still very much attached to hers.
Liv began to rub the area she had just pinched to take the sting out for the big baby on top of her. She almost laughed again, but she really wasn't quite ready for him to lose it just yet. Instead, she reached her other hand down to his other ass cheek and gripped two handfuls firmly.
Whatever the hell she was doing, he was game. He moved one leg over hers, giving her hands easier reaching abilities.
Encouraged by his actions, she thrust him closer using the grip she had. At the same time, she roughly slammed her hips against his. The feeling was all intense, and she knew he felt it too when he broke the kiss and moaned, putting his weight on his palms on the bed.
"You like that?" He asked.
She spoke no words. Just continued slamming their bodies together and reveled in the feeling.
"Take a break. Bigfoot's got this." He dipped his head to peck her lips once and then thrust his hips against hers. Once he was inside her to the hilt, he ground their pelvises together for a few seconds, and then pulled almost all the way out of her and repeating it again.
"Yes! More! Mmmmm!" She panted out, trying to keep up with him.
He paused long enough to lean down and nibble on a nipple beckoned him to feast. That had her gripping the sheets and squirming underneath him again. The need to move faster was overwhelming, and he reluctantly dropped the tasty treat to focus on that need.
Jackhammer. It was the only mental picture Olivia could imagine to compare what he was doing to her body. He was relentlessly pounding in and out of her with an un stoppable drive. It felt absolutely delicious, and she would never compare him to a fifteen year old again! "Fitz! Fitz! Fitz!"
Why was the sound of her chanting his name the hottest most powerful thing in the world to his ears? As good as he was feeling and as close as he felt to it, he would not cross the finish line before her. Time to try something new with her. Reaching a hand down between them, Fitz fumbled until he found her bundle of nerves and started attempting to rub light circles on it. He'd much rather use his tongue, but that was physically impossible at the moment.
"What...are you..."whimpering. "Doing to me?"
"You see, when a man and a woman have sex the goal is to..."
"SHUT UP! And don't stop. Oh god! Please don't stop!"
"I had no...mmmm...intention of...stopping. Not until you are...ahhhhhhh completely satisfied." He needed to stop talking and focus. He pushed her over that line seconds before he was right behind her. He could hear her breathing like she had been chased by a murderer in the woods, but he couldn't see her. Not yet. He was in a similar state, trying to understand where all the air in his bedroom had disappeared to. Still, he groped around on the bed for her hand, and held onto it while they tried to get themselves together.
A/N - I can only hope that was worth the wait. I know sex is usually romanticized in writing - it has been by me before too - but sometimes it's funny banter and real conversations too. I felt like these 2 would be that way & I hope no one takes offense to my mix of the light hearted and the honesty. One chapter to go!
